Monthly Archives: July 2009

Has Sarah Palin Boarded the Crazy Train To Koo-Koo Town?

PalinLooneyTunes

Sarah Palin has been strangely silent since she quit the office of Governor of Alaska. No public speeches. No television appearences. No radio interviews. Little to no Twitter tweets. Oh where, oh where has the winking one gone?

Has she perhaps made a visit to the “Nervous Hospital”? Is she secretly receiving hair restoration treatments? Has she begun writing her book (probably not, she has a ghostwriter for that)? Is she helping O.J. Simpson find the real killers? Is she with Jimmy Hoffa? Has she gone underground?

We all wait with baited breath for our next Sarah sighting. Until then, please enjoy another Sarah Palin song parody. This time it is derived from a song written by those Bad Boys From Boston, Aerosmith.

Please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Back In The Saddle song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uQ_aXyStWO0

BACK IN WASILLA

(sung to the Aerosmith song “Back In The Saddle”)

She’s back
She’s back in Wasilla again
She’s back
She’s back in Wasilla again

Ridin’ into town dethroned
Like a childish cartoon
Lookin’ for Levi Johnston
To pop like a balloon
That boy’s the missing link
He best not tell no lies
Before Ol’ Sarah can wink
She’ll put out both his eyes

She’s back in Wasilla again
She’s back
She’s back in Wasilla again
She’s back

Best hide all of your dogs and cats
Until the risin’ sun
She’s in her copter wearin’ spats
And with her loaded gun
Shootin’ every living thing
That she can see
Sportin’ those fur hides like bling
On the T.V.
Reciting all of her lines
Like a G.O.P. hack
Tho’ she’s dressed to the nines
Does she have to come……back?

She’s back in Wasilla again
She’s back
She’s back in Wasilla again

She’s whining, and blaming the media
She’s whining, and talkin’ trash “Ya Betcha”
She’s whining, and claimin’ life’s a bummer
She’s whining, where’s her best pal “Joe the Plumber?”

She’s back in Wasilla again
She’s back
She’s back in Wasilla again
She’s back

Tellin’ lies
Tellin’ lies
Tellin’ lies
Already

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Jindal-Bells, Jindal-Bells, Jindal All The Way!

Mr. Jindal's Neighborhood promotional photo

Mr. Jindal's Neighborhood promotional photo

What a pathetic maroon. It appears that Louisiana Governor, Bobby Jindal has fallen into the same trap as Republican governors Mark Sanford (South Carolina) and Sarah Palin (Alaska). After last November’s election, these three (along with a few other more established Republicans) were considered to be serious contenders for the 2012 Republican Presidential nomination. But, something funny happened on the way to the convention. All three first tried to make a name for themselves by publicly declaring that they opposed all of President Obama’s stimulus initiatives and then upped the ante by declaring that they would not accept any stimulus funds on behalf of their respective states.

Problem is, when you publicly declare something, the public tends to take notice and hold you to your word. Sanford and Palin both reversed track and accepted the funds. Coincidentally, Palin is no longer a governor and Sanford’s days are numbered. So, then there was one. Bobby Jindal.

After witnessing the demise of Palin and Sanford, Jindal has elected to try a different tactic. He criticized the stimulus package allotted to his home state. He then gleefully, yet secretly, accepted the federal dollars. Thereafter, just yesterday, he disbursed hundreds of thousands of those same dollars (with a promise of millions more to follow) to his constituents but failed to inform them that the money was, in fact, federal stimulus money. How did he do this? Simple, he had a few of those giant checks printed up (you know, like the Publishers’ Clearinghouse checks on tv) which showed the payor/maker to be, ready…, you got it… ” State of Louisiana, Office of the Governor.”

That’s correct. He simply negated to tell his constituents that they were receiving federal stimulus proceeds and instead, mislead them to believe that his office was responsible for the payouts. (See photo below.) As Arte Johnson from the 1960’s television show, Laugh-In would say, “Very interesting…but stupid!” Jindal failed to realize that even some Louisianians can read about his deception in the press. Ouch!

jindal-check

For a very good description of Jindal’s latest antics, see this Crooks and Liars piece here.

Today’s song parody is another from off that list of #1 songs that appeared on my birthday. This one being from 1970. Please enjoy.

Please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L4XEbwyvxPc

TINFOIL KEEPS FORMING ON HIS HEAD

(sung to the B.J. Thomas song “Raindrops keep Falling On My Head”)

Tinfoil keeps formin’ on his head
Bob Jindal’s the guy who can’t remember what he said
Boy, what a dimwit
That tinfoil keeps formin’ on his head, it keeps formin’

Jindal’s been sitting way too long in the sun
He won’t admit it but he needs those Stimulus Funds
Just to keep his job
That tinfoil keeps formin’ on his head, it keeps formin’

And there’s one thing we know
This Jindal guy will cheat me indiscreetly
It won’t be long till Bobby J. implodes completely

Tinfoil keeps formin’ on his head
It’s hard to believe that he’s Louisiana born and bred
Whining constantly
Yet, Bobby still wants to play the game of complainin’
He just can’t see
He’s a spoiled crybaby

(musical interlude)

It won’t be long till Bobby J. implodes completely

Tinfoil keeps formin’ on his head
There’s no chance his state will ever emerge from the red
Not with Bobby J.
Cuz he don’t believe in funds for good job re-trainin’
Or equal pay
There’s no hope for LA


Birth Of A Fiction

Fred Derf, President of the Birther Movement

Fred Derf (R) Funkytown, President of the Birther Movement

If the Republican Party truly desires to return to relevence in American politics, it will first need to distance itself from many of the moon-bat sub groups which comprise its base. The most recent example of one of these conservative reich wing fringe groups is “The Birthers.” You know these crackpots. These are the folks that claim that Barack Obama is not the President of the United States because he was born in Kenya. Of course, they choose to ignore the fact that the State of Hawaii has certified his birth; the fact that his birth announcement appeared in two local Hawaii newspapers in 1961; the fact that that the Republican Governor has stated that he was born there and the fact that the most recent Republican nominee for President, John McCain has stated that he was born in Hawaii (which is interesting itself in light of the fact that McCain was born in Panama).

Facts simply do not matter to”The Birthers.” They would rather ignore facts and simply continue spreading baseless inaccuracies in an attempt to thwart the Obama Presidency. Here is a good example of Birthers in action. Hilarious. Turns out the crazy red shirted woman (why do these nuts always wear red shirts?) is known by local radio station callers as “Crazy Eileen” and has been banned from calling shows on WGMD.

Thankfully, the whole “Birther” brouhaha was finally put to rest yesterday. The House of Representatives unanimously passed a bill declaring Hawaii the birth place of President Obama.

Now on deck for the Crazy Republican Right Wing Base…?????

As you know, we here at Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off have a fondness for music. The “Birther” controversy piqued my interest in finding not only the #1 song played on the day of my birth, but also the #1 songs on each of my successive birthdays thereafter. After a bit of research, it was learned that this information can be found here. Try it. It is fun. The following is a list of the #1 songs on my first ten birthdays:

Go Away Little Girl – Steve Lawrence

There! I’ve Said it Again – Bobby Vinton

Come See About Me – The Supremes

We Can work it Out – The Beatles

I’m A Believer – The Monkees

Hello Goodbye – The Beatles

I Heard It Through The Grapevine – Marvin Gaye

Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head – B.J. Thomas

My Sweet Lord/Isn’t It A Pity – George Harrison

American Pie – Don McClean

You’re So Vain – Carley Simon

Staying on topic, today’s song parody will be derived from the first song on the list and will address our favorite right wing nut job. You guessed it, Sarah Palin.

Click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Go Away Little Girl song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k0OrTZd5KM0

GO AWAY SARAH GIRL

(sung to the Steve Lawrence song “Go Away Little Girl”)

Go away, Sarah girl
Go away, Sarah girl
We’ve had enough of you and the First Dude
You quit because of the heat
On Twitter now you can tweet
We’ve moved on to someone else
We’re all done with you

Oh, go away, Palin girl
Go away, Palin girl
Don’t think for even one minute that you can stay
Please fulfill our biggest wish
“Go with the flow like dead fish”
So, go away, Palin girl, and leave as soon as today

Go away

Make our day

That smile now is a pout

There’ll be no more hissy fits
Let’s have one last goodbye kiss
So, go away, Sarah girl
Call it a day, Sarah girl
Oh, please, go away, Sarah girl
And make it a happy day

Go away

Ebony And Ivy League (Updated 7/30/09)

Professor Gates and Officer Crowley continue to argue at White House

Professor Gates and Officer Crowley continue to argue at White House

We all know the story by now. In short, last week, Harvard professor Henry Louis Gates was arrested at his home by Cambridge, MA police officer, James Crowley on a charge of disorderly conduct. The events leading to the arrest were as follows.

Gates was attempting to enter his home after having just returned from an oversea business engagement. His front door was jammed and therefore, he and his driver were physically attempting to force the door open. At that time, a passerby noticed the situation, thought that perhaps she was witnessing a break-in, and consequently dialed 911 to report what she saw. Officer Crowley arrived at the scene after Gates had gained entrance to his home and questioned him as to his identity. An argument ensued between Gates and the officer during which Gates allegedly inter alia accused the officer of racial profiling and may have insulted the officer before providing identification proving he resided at the home. Despite providing said identification, Gates was arrested and charged with disorderly conduct. The next morning, the charges were dropped by the Middlesex County District Attorney.

The story immediately attracted news coverage in the Boston, MA area. Later, it attracted national news coverage when President Barack Obama (an acquaintance of Henry Gates) stated during a press conference that he thought (admittedly without knowing all of the facts) that the police officer, “acted stupidly.”

In typical anti-Obama Republican fashion, the right wing initiated an all out assault on the President by means of insinuating that he is either anti-law enforcement, racist or both. Obama did not take the bait. Instead, he has described the initial incident as well as the follow-up coverage and debate as a “teaching moment” from which we may learn how to better deal with race relations. To that end, he invited Professor Gates and Officer Crowley to the White House for a beer and an opportunity to discuss and hopefully defuse the situation on July 29th. We will keep you posted on the outcome of said meeting.

Although quite interested in the story, this humble scribe elected not to comment because of the story’s initial lack of national relevance. Once the reich wing media (i.e. Limbaugh, Beck etc.) began distorting the story as an unwarranted assault on law enforcement however, I now feel compelled to express my opinion.

I do not believe that Officer Crowley is a racist. I also do not believe that Professor Gates should have been arrested for disorderly conduct while lawfully at his home and after having produced identification proving so. That being said, I do believe that Professor Gates over-reacted by means of alleging that he was a victim of racial profiling and by directing insulting language at the officer when questioned as to his right to be in the home. I also believe, however, that Officer Crowley over-reacted to the verbal barrage by means of conducting an illegal arrest after it was proven that Gates had the right to be in the home. The District Attorney apparently agrees because the charges were immediately dropped.

In my opinion officer Crowley’s indiscretion was worse however, because he allowed his position of authority to be influenced by his personal feelings, rather than the law. This resulted in the full force of governmental police arrest power being initiated against an innocent man primarily because the innocent man said things to the officer which may have insulted him or hurt his feelings. This is not the way the law was intended to work. In short, Officer Crowley should have had thicker skin, accepted the insult without retaliation and exited Mr. Gates’ home. His failure to have done so may eventually lead to the taxpayers of Cambridge, MA being held responsible for the payment of legal damages to Professor Gates as the result of what a court of law may determine to be an illegal arrest.

I sincerely hope that it does not come to that. I hope that after having shared a beer or three at the White House and discussing the matter, the two reasonable men may put their differences aside and carry on without the need for protracted litigation and the acrimony and media attention that come therewith.

UPDATE 07/30/09

More disturbing news in Massachusetts today. Boston Police Officer, Justin Barrett has been placed on leave, stripped of his badge and gun, and is in the process of having his job terminated as the result of sending a racial slur laden email to many people as well as the Boston Globe. Barrett, also a member of the National Guard, used the term, “banana-eating jungle monkey” four times in the email communication, three times in reference to Professor Henry Louis Gates and once in reference to a Boston Globe columnist that wrote about the racially charged Gates/Crowley controversy.

Oh, and the Red Sox also lost again last night.

OK, now it is time for a fun song parody. Please enjoy.

Ebony and Ivory song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmALA8miQY8

EBONY AND IVY LEAGUE

(sung to the Paul McCartney song “Ebony And Ivory”)

Ebony and Ivy League got a dose of police brutality
Side by side Gates and Crowley were heard, oh Lord, arguing
They both earned fifteen minutes of shame, that honky and bro
But you can’t arrest just everyone,
We learn to live
And to forgive,
Each other even when we get jived, at home while inside

Ebony and Ivy League facing Cambridge Police brutality
Side by side Gates and Crowley were heard, oh Lord, arguing

(musical interlude)

Ebony, Ivy League, Cambridge Police brutality
Ebony, Ivy League, ooh

We all know, Gates called Crowley a name inside of his home
But you can’t arrest just everyone
Where they do live
You should forgive,
Another even when you get jived, your sure to survive

Ebony and Ivy League facing Cambridge Police brutality
Side by side Gates and Crowley were heard, oh Lord, arguing

Ebony, Ivy League, Cambridge Police brutality
Ebony, Ivy League, Cambridge Police brutality
Ebony, Ivy League, Cambridge Police brutality
(repeat and fade)

The Crazy World Of Michele Bachmann

Judge Judy schools Michele Bachmann

Judge Judy schools Michele Bachmann

Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann is often associated with the term, “Batshit Crazy.” Recently, the National Republican Congressional Committee added Bachmann’s name to its “Patriot Program” which identifies Republican office holders that are vulnerable to defeat and attempts to re-brand them as somehow “palatable.” To be blunt. If you are a Republican office holder, you do not want to be included in the “Patriot Program.”

Rather than try to explain the craziness of Michele Bachmann, we thought it would be best to let you judge for yourselves by reading some of her actual quotes.

“Little children will be forced to learn that homosexuality is normal and natural and perhaps they should try it.”
Sen Michele Bachmann, Interview with Jan Markell, Olive Tree Ministries.

and

“Many teenagers that come in should be paying the employer because of broken dishes or whatever occurs during that period of time. But you know what? After six months, that teenager is going to be a fabulous employee and is going to go on a trajectory where he’s going to be making so much money, we’ll be borrowing money from him.” —Michele Bachmann, 1/26/05, explaining why teenagers should pay employers for the privilege of working instead of receiving minimum wage.

and

“Approximately 114 million Americans are expected to leave private health insurance. Why? Their employers will drop the insurance because the taxpayer-subsidized plan will be 30 to 40 percent cheaper.” —Michele Bachmann accidentally making the case for the public option

oh, and here is a fun one

“Any of you who have members of your family that are in the lifestyle – we have a member of our family that is. This is not funny. It’s a very sad life. It’s part of Satan, I think, to say this is gay. It’s anything but gay.” – Michele Bachmann, (R) Minnesota 6th District.

and our favorite

“Is there no longer freedom of speech in this chamber, Mr. President?….Mr. President…MR. PRESIDENT?….You can turn my microphone off now.” – Michele Bachmann, May 16, 2004, Last day of 2004 Session.

For these quotes and even more, please visit Dump Bachmann.

Click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

The Flintstones television theme song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hByFDVwiQq8

BACHMANN

(sung to the television theme song “The Flinstones”)

Bachmann. Michele Bachman
A Congresswoman that is bat crazy
She and Sarah Palin
Driving voters from the G.O.P.

She can’t form a sentence that’s complete
Now she’s targeted for big defeat

When you’re Michele Bachmann
You’re just living off the state dime
Endorsing hate crimes
Exposed during prime time

Bachmann. Michele Bachman
Hates Blacks, children and those that are gay
She is clearly brain dead
Can’t seem to get out of her own way

She talks right through the rain, snow and sleet
Every single thought is incomplete

When you’re Michele Bachmann
You’re just living off the state dime
Endorsing hate crimes
Exposed during prime time

Exposed during prime time

Republicans: Adultery And Other Assorted Values

Sanford-Super-GOP-AHole

Republicans, the gift that keeps on giving. Now batting, Tennessee state senator Paul Stanley (no, not the make-up adorned rock star from Kiss). Where do we begin? Stanley is a 47 year old married (to a woman, of course) father of two who campaigns on an “abstinence only” platform. Last April, he told a Planned Parenthood representative that he could not support the organization because he, “didn’t believe young people should have sex before marriage.”

Really, Senator Stanley? Now, isn’t that special? Fact is however, that Stanley, like so many other Bible thumping, “family values” Republicans, is a hypocritical philanderer. His sexual tryst with his 22 year old legislative intern was revealed this week when he admitted that he was blackmailed into purchasing explicit photographs and video evidence of the affair by the girl’s boyfriend. Only surprise here is that further details did not reveal a trip to South America or a sit-in at an airport Men’s room stall. But stay tuned. These Republican adultery stories always seem to veer off into the absurd.

We can now update our list of Republican “Family Values” adulterers.

Ronald Reagan, Newt Gingrich, John McCain, David Vitter, Mark Foley, Larry Craig, Rudolph Giuliani, Ted Haggard, Bob Allen, Glenn Murphy, Jr., John Ensign, Sarah Palin (maybe), Mark Sanford and now, Paul Stanley.

Batting next for the Republicans…?

Please click on the song link below so as to have more fun singing along.

The Addams Family television theme  song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVRX_5tGOlo&feature=related

THE HORNY G.O.P.

(sung to the television theme song “The Addams Family”)

They’re creepy and they’re horny
Their dialect is corny
Morality is phony
The shady G.O.P.

If you’re in a museum
It’s real easy to see ‘em
With pants down to their knees’m
The dodgy G.O.P.

(Cheat)
(Beat)
(Their meat)

They always get their ball on
And that’s the sword they fall on
Another gal to crawl on
The horny G.O.P.

Palin And The Press

Palin-and-the-press

Just when you think that you are finally free of her, Sarah Palin reaches out, grabs you and drags you right back on to her planet. She gave her resignation (er, quitting) address yesterday and could not restrain herself from taking another shot at the press. She said:

And first, some straight talk for some, just some in the media because another right protected for all of us is freedom of the press, and you all have such important jobs reporting facts and informing the electorate, and exerting power to influence.  You represent what could and should be a respected honest profession that could and should be the cornerstone of our democracy.  Democracy depends on you, and that is why, that’s why our troops are willing to die for you.  So, how ’bout in honor of the American soldier, ya quit makin’ things up.

Huh? She failed of course, to give even one concrete example of the press “makin’ things up” about her or her family, so we must only speculate as to what she could have meant.

Let’s see, could it be that she couldn’t name a Supreme Court case other than Roe v. Wade? No, that was true. She could not.

Could it have been when they stated that she could not name a single newspaper, magazine or periodical that she reads? No, that was also true.

Could it be that the press exposed the fact that her teenaged unwed daughter was pregnant? No, in fact she volunteered that spicy tidbit herself before a national audience.

It must have been when the press falsely reported that it took her six years and five colleges before she earned her college degree. Nope, that was true also. To her credit though, even though she quit four colleges, she only quit one elected office.

If it is none of the above, then just what did the press make up about her and her family. When asked that precise question, Sarah Palin’s response was…

I’ll have to get back to ya on that

Oh, Sarah? We are still waiting.

Click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

You’re So Vain song link: http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x3dzr8_youre-so-vain-carly-simon_music

YOU’RE  SO LAME

(sung to the Carly Simon song, “You’re So Vain

You’re in the G.O.P. party
You think of yourself as a big shot
Your rimless glasses in front of your two eyes
Your shoes are a polka dot
You’re a fashion disaster, like
A whore in the parking lot
And John McCain dreamed that he’d be your partner
He’d be your partner, but

You’re so lame
You probably thought you’d win the election
You’re to blame
For causing massive voter rejection
Yes you. Yes you.

You hurried back to Alaska
Where you were still known as the Guv
You showed your disdain for the Legislature
You thought you could push and shove
But they taught you a thing or two
When they shot down Wayne Ross
Now there’s your problem with mass ethics complaints
Mass ethics complaints, and

You’re so lame
You’ll never win another election
You’re to blame
For Bristol’s failure to use protection

Now there’s your problem with mass ethics complaints
Mass ethics complaints, and

You’re so lame
You’ll never win another election
You’re to blame
For Bristol’s failure to use protection
Yes you. Yes you.

Well, I hear you flew down to NYC
And took little Bristol along
You need to mend some fences with the G.O.P.
While Bristol sings her abstinence song
With the Fox News folks you’ll wine and dine
And take a photo or two
Then you’ll return to Alaska as a disaster
As a disaster, and

You’re so lame
You’ll never win another election
You’re to blame
For Bristol’s failure to use protection
Yes you. Yes you.

Ann Coulter – Man On The Run

Coulter playboy

Look at those feminine hands.

Is she gone yet? Has Sarah Palin finally left the building? Thank goodness. Now we can return to lambasting all the other Reich Wing politicians and pundits for awhile before we dissect and analyze the Palin farewell address. So, without further adieu…

Of all the guys out there, who do you believe is the most acerbic, racist, homophobic right-wing pundit? Here, at Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off, we believe that it is Ann Coulter. This guy is so terrifying that he scares our pets when he appears on television. If there was ever a true right-wing boogeyman, this guy is it.

He outdid himself two weeks ago on the Fox Network’s Glenn Beck show when he stated, “being black trumps being an insect.” Even Beck was convinced that Coulter’s rhetoric,     ” has spiraled out of control.” Here is the clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pglUjpH7whQ

Coulter jumped the shark a long time ago (perhaps when he called John Edwards “a faggot”), nevertheless the folks at Fox News keep his star burning. He is a regular guest on not only Beck’s program, but also on Hannity and The O’Reilly Factor. His appearances however, seem calculated only to market his newest liberal trashing book rather than to advance any original coherent argument on behalf of the right wing cause. Indeed some of his quotes inadvertantly point out the absurdity of the conservative movement and may serve to steer voters away from the Republican Party. Let’s look at a few:

If we took away women’s right to vote, we’d never have to worry about another Democrat president. It’s kind of a pipe dream, it’s a personal fantasy of mine, but I don’t think it’s going to happen. And it is a good way of making the point that women are voting so stupidly, at least single women. It also makes the point, it is kind of embarrassing, the Democratic Party ought to be hanging its head in shame, that it has so much difficulty getting men to vote for it. I mean, you do see it’s the party of women and ‘We’ll pay for health care and tuition and day care — and here, what else can we give you, soccer moms”?

or

“These broads are millionaires, lionized on TV and in articles about them, reveling in their status as celebrities and stalked by griefparrazies. I have never seen people enjoying their husband’s deaths so much.” -on 9/11 widows who have been critical of the Bush administration

and

“We just want Jews to be perfected, as they say.” –arguing that it would be better if we were all Christian

and of course, our favorite

“I’m more of a man than any liberal.”

No argument from us on that that last quote of his. In fact, there have been rumors circulating on the internets tubes for some time now which advance the proposition that Ann Coulter is actually a male. Most of these articles focus on a few missing years during his adolescence when he presumably left the country to have a sex change operation overseas. The articles also often draw attention to his pronounced Adam’s Apple and masculine looking hands. Additionally, it is frequently pointed out that he has never been married or had children.

Here at Blast-Off, we have no idea as to the credibility of the Mann Coulter rumors. We do, however hope said rumors are true because of the wealth of satirical material which such a situation would spawn. As you can guess, we really do not like Ann Coulter or anything he has to say. So, without further adieu, let’s have a song…
Remember to click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Band On The Run song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7D65IomNYY

M’ANN ON THE RUN

(sung to the Paul McCartney and Wings song “Band On The Run”)

Just a boy with no balls, thinking that he’s clever,
Never havin’ no fun nights again, quite true,
Coulter you, Coulter you.

(musical interlude)

Spreading his politics of fear,
Hating you if you’re Black or gay,
Not a hint of veracity,
Does not know any other way
A transsexual without peer.
A transsexual without peer.

Well the rain exploded with a mighty crash when the Coulters had a son,
And before you know it he was growing his hair but he put it in a bun
M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run
Coulter had a plan not to be a man. A sex change would be so fun

For the M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run,

Next he put mascara on his manly eyes, but he lacked a curvy bum
And as he was singing, he let down his hair. He was having so much fun
M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run
Coulter had a plan not to be a man. A sex change would be so fun

Yeah the M’Ann on the run, the M’Ann on the run,
Yeah the M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run

Well, Fox News was calling as the right-wing world produced another clown
And the sound he’s making, unbalanced not fair, rumbles through the underground
M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run

Always touting “Drudge” and loves to judge
Research reveals this bore

He’s a M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run, M’Ann on the run,

Palin Is Slip Slidin’ Away

Palin Thinking

The Anti-Palin Funny Song Blog Marathon continues all weekend long here at Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off. That’s right, we will post anti-Palin songs and articles at a breathtaking pace for the next 48 hours in an attempt to keep you amused and informed during the final days of the Reign of Sarah Palin.

It is hard to believe that the short-lived but greatly divisive governorship of Sarah Palin is over. Thankfully, we will retain our memories of her hapless hijinks. The next several blog entries and song parodies will commemorate many of the Palin era lowlights. Please check back frequently as new entries will be posted rapidly in an attempt to keep you fully entertained prior to Caribou Barbie’s resignation speech. Also too, please leave a comment or three as they are always appreciated.

The following song parody is of a song that is an old favorite of ours. Please enjoy.

Click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Slip Slidin’ Away song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vuPJzzcV6jA

SLIP SLIDIN’ AWAY

(sung to the Paul Simon song “Slip Slidin’ Away”)

Slip slidin’ away
Slip slidin’ away
You know the nearer her resignation
Her numbers keep slidin’ away

I knew a gal
She’s from Wasilla Town
She was a beehive wearin’ woman
With a pageant crown
Did nothing for us
In her two years
Her perfume was so overpowering
She scared away the polar bears

Slip slidin’ away
Slip slidin’ away
You know the nearer her resignation
Her numbers keep slidin’ away

She’s from Alaska
The First Dude’s wife
She won’t condone birth control choices
‘Cuz she is pro-life
She said Tina Fey
Was such a pain
She likes to fly and fill wolves with hot lead
Without concern that they feel pain

Slip slidin’ away
Slip slidin’ away
You know the nearer her resignation
Her numbers keep slidin’ away

She is a mother
Who totes a gun
On snow machines in winter seasons
Each and every one
After a long day
She would explain
That there are few ways to keep busy
When you are a governor without a brain

Slip slidin’ away
Slip slidin’ away
You know the nearer her resignation
Her numbers keep slidin’ away

She had some foes
They had a plan
They found she was not unassailable
The next time she ran
When ethics problems
Won’t go away
She’ll quit and head right down the highway
As her support keeps slidin’ away

Slip slidin’ away
Slip slidin’ away
You know the nearer her resignation
Her numbers keep slidin’ away

Slip slidin’ away
You know the nearer her resignation
Her numbers keep slidin’ away
Mmm…

Sarah (You’re A Fine Girl)

sarah-palin-promo

The Anti-Palin Funny Song Blog Marathon continues all weekend long here at Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off. That’s right, we will post anti-Palin songs and articles at a breathtaking pace for the next 48 hours in an attempt to keep you amused and informed during the final days of the Reign of Sarah Palin.

It is hard to believe that the short-lived but greatly divisive governorship of Sarah Palin is over. Thankfully, we will retain our memories of her hapless hijinks. The next several blog entries and song parodies will commemorate many of the Palin era lowlights. Please check back frequently as new entries will be posted rapidly in an attempt to keep you fully entertained prior to Caribou Barbie’s resignation speech. Also too, please leave a comment or three as they are always appreciated.

The following song parody is from one of the most frequently requested karaoke songs, Brandy (You’re A Fine Girl). Please enjoy.

Click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Brandy (You’re A Fine Girl) song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-tRXewCAmU

SARAH (YOU’RE A FINE GIRL)

(sung to the Looking Glass song “Brandy (You’re a Fine Girl)”)

(doo da in doo da da), (doo da in doo da da)

There’s a town not far from Bristol Bay
With strip malls, both near and far away
Lonely oil guys go the Wasilla way
And live in motor homes

And there’s a girl in this forlorn town
One time, she wore a pageant crown
They say “Sarah, please put that gun down”
She knows she’s just a punch-line

The oil guys say “Sarah, you’re a fine girl” (you’re a fine girl)
“What a good Prez you would be” (such a fine girl)
“Not here, but maybe somewhere overseas”
(doo da in doo da da), (doo da in doo da da)

Sarah, sports a beehive mane
And some rimless glasses but she has no brain
A locket that bears the name
Of the man that Sarah loves

He came on a winter’s day
On board his gas-powered sleigh
What he saw in her, Todd couldn’t say
Cuz he was drunk since he left home

The First Dude said “Sarah, you’re a fine girl” (you’re a fine girl)
“What a good wife you would be” (such a fine girl)
But it’s booze, snow-machining and pornos for me
(doo da in doo da da), (doo da in doo da da)

But Sarah looked into his eyes
And she took an inventory
She could feel something on him rise
Then she saw his morning glory
She said “To hell with abstinence!”, Lord, she jumped on that sad-sack
And before she could say “Stop!”, she had Track.
(doo da in doo da da), (doo da in doo da da)

Todd, had a loaded pistol
Sarah gave birth to a daughter,  Bristol
She too had an ac-ci-den-tal
And now you hear her say…

You hear her say “Mama, you’re a fine girl” (you’re a fine girl)
“Two peas in a pod aren’t we” (such a fine girl)
“But Ya Betcha we have a screwed-up family”
(doo da in doo da da), (doo da in doo da da)

“Sarah, you’re a fine girl” (you’re a fine girl)
[FADE]

“What a good Prez you would be” (such a fine girl)
“No not here, but maybe somewhere overseas”