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Scott Brown Enables A Child Molester To Roam Freely

The talk radio airwaves in Boston were abuzz yesterday with discussion of Senator Scott Brown (R-MA). The one-time Tea Party darling who shocked the nation by winning Ted Kennedy’s Senate seat in 2010 had been fading from the public spotlight of late. For a short while, Brown was the 41st GOP Senator and consequently, his was the vote that could kill any Democratic Party bills. That all changed last November when the Republicans captured a few more Senate seats and Brown’s vote was no longer so critical. Brown also lost favor with the Tea Baggers when he sided with the Democrats on a number of bills including the financial reform regulation bill. Moreover, his intentional absence from Sarah Palin’s Boston Tea Party rally last April sealed his fate as a Tea Party has-been.

So, why all the recent interest in all things Scott Brown? The reason is simple. He released his memoir on Monday which is titled, “Against All Odds: My Life of Hardship, Fast Breaks, and Second Chances”. Heck, the title alone takes up the first few pages of text. The book itself however, is not what thrust Brown into the limelight once again. Rather, it was the press release which preceded the book last week wherein Brown revealed for the first time that he had been a victim of childhood sexual abuse on at least three occasions and by two different deviants. By including that bit of personal red meat in the pre-publication release, there is no denying that the revelation was intended to launch sales of his book.

Indeed, despite the other stories about a poor childhood, a history of youthful crime, some basketball, the military and his nude modeling, it was the sexual abuse that was the bombshell. Suddenly Brown appeared on Sunday night’s “60 Minutes”, “The View” and of course on “Fox News” and the discussion always turned to the sexual abuse. There are of course, fewer things more personally devastating to a child than sexual molestation and anybody who was subjected to such treatment deserves much sympathy. The fact that Brown not only overcame it, but then excelled at so many things thereafter is an example of true dedication.

Nevertheless, Brown is now unexpectedly receiving a great deal of blow-back in his own backyard. When asked by local television station WBZ if he would pursue his alleged sexual abuser, Brown said, “I have more important things to do… he’s probably in his 70s today.” Brown has even refused to identify the camp counselor that sexually abused him and declined a request by the Cape Cod & Islands District Attorney Michael O’Keefe to pursue an investigation to find the abuser and stop him. Brown’s post-publication words and actions are not sitting well with his constituents. Nor should they.

Brown has now painted himself into a corner. He had every right to keep his sexual abuse to himself as a matter of personal privacy. Indeed, he admitted last week, that until the release of his book, he never mentioned the molestation to anyone including his mother and wife. That was his prerogative, but as soon as Brown publicized the abuse in his memoir, the rules changed. The criminal allegations have now been made public by Brown and there are resultant ramifications and obligations which must be addressed. Scott Brown now has a moral duty to reveal the identity of his abuser if for no other reason than to prevent this sexual predator from hurting more children. It makes no difference that the criminal is “probably in his 70’s” because there are countless examples of convicted sexual predators in that age range. Additionally, inasmuch as sex offenders tend to repeat their crimes, it is likely that an identification made by a victim with Brown’s stature would urge any other past victims to come forward. Scott Brown’s silence is enabling an alleged child molester to remain on the loose. In short, Brown is personally profiting from his revelations of sexual molestation while doing nothing to prevent other children from suffering the same sexual abuse by the same deviant. That is not the type of leadership we expect from a United States Senator.

All of this also reminds us of Scott Brown’s decision just last autumn to endorse a fellow Republican, state Representative Jeffrey Perry, in his bid to replace Democratic Representative William Delahunt in Congress. During the campaign, it was revealed that Perry, while he was an officer with the Wareham (MA) Police Dept., allegedly covered up the actions of a fellow officer who was eventually found guilty of conducting illegal strip searches of two teen-aged girls allegedly in the presence of Perry. The Boston Globe reported, “One victim, who allowed herself to be identified by her maiden name, Lisa Allen, said in a late-October statement opposing Perry’s election that the then-Wareham sergeant “had to hear me screaming and crying” as Officer Scott Flanagan put his hand down the 14-year-old’s pants and ordered her to lift her bra after he, Perry, and another officer came upon a group of teens suspected of using drugs near a cranberry bog in 1991. Arguing Perry lacked the character to serve in such high office, Allen said: “Perry did not care about protecting teen-aged girls in Wareham from police officer Flanagan. Jeff Perry cared only about protecting police officer Flanagan.” Perry lost the election to Democrat William Delahunt.

Scott Brown endorsed Perry but never directly addressed the former officer’s involvement in the cover-up of the molestation. Rather, he criticized Perry’s opponent for making the subject known. In fact, Brown said, “It’s to the point: ‘Bill, stop with the dirty politics”. Wouldn’t you think that as the result of also having been sexually molested as a child, that Brown would not have considered the female victim’s statements and Delahunt’s criticism as merely “dirty politics”? Wouldn’t Brown have identified with the victim and perhaps second-guessed his endorsement. He did not. Brown simply towed the Republican Party line and supported Perry, and he has now politicized his own sexual molestation and is padding his wallet while doing so. And all this happens while a child molester remains at large because Brown refuses to identify him.

Senator Brown cannot have it both ways. It is morally abhorrent for him to profit by means of publicizing his own childhood sexual molestation and then to claim that he wants to keep the identity of the perpetrator a private matter. His book made this a public matter, and victims may be mounting as Scott Brown selfishly protects a child molester by refusing to identify him.

Scott Brown will need more than the Tea Party to win re-election in 2012. Massachusetts Republicans and Democrats may disagree on many issues, but protecting sexual offenders is not one of them.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody. Enjoy!

Bad, Bad Leroy Brown song link:


(sung to the Jim Croce song “Bad, Bad Leroy Brown”)

Well its nuthin’ like Chicago
We’re talkin’ ‘bout Boston Town
And if you like men bare
You’re gonna love it there
With Senator Scottie Brown

Now Scottie’s talkin’ double
He loved the Mass. health reform law
He voted for it like the flip-flopping Guvnor
Yet now he has declared war

And he’s nude, dude Scottie Brown
The nudist man in the whole damn town
On the issues he’s wrong
He won’t be in office long

Now Scottie he’s in NAMBLA
And he likes to strip his clothes
And he shows the world his private things
Most everywhere he goes
His senate seat is just a rental
Leased by the Tea Party crew
He better have some fun cuz he’s soon to be done
Massachusetts is too damn Blue

And he’s nude, dude Scottie Brown
The nudist man in the whole damn town
On the issues he’s wrong
He won’t be in office long

Well Friday ‘bout a week ago
Scottie was not nice
He just shouted near and far
About all the horrors
Of health care and the price
Well he blasted dear Obama
That’s when Brown’s trouble began
Scottie Brown learned a lesson
‘Bout messin’ with the likes of a smarter man

And he’s nude, dude Scottie Brown
The nudist man in the whole damn town
On the issues he’s wrong
He won’t be in office long

You see, Scott Brown needs enlightening
He don’t give a damn ‘bout the poor
Scottie Brown’s big mouth should be muzzled
As he’s voted off of the floor

And he’s nude, dude Scottie Brown
The nudist man in the whole damn town
On the issues he’s wrong
He won’t be in office long

And he’s nude, dude Scottie Brown
The nudist man in the whole damn town
On the issues he’s wrong
He won’t be in office long

Yeah, on the issues he’s wrong
He won’t be in office long

BREAKING NEWS: Nudist Teapublican Senator Scott Brown Was Buggered!

Scott Brown chuckles during his "60 Minutes" interview.

Sometimes you just have to wonder what inspires  people to reveal personal things. It was just over a year ago that the Tea Party claimed its first election victory at the federal level. In the special election to fill the late Ted Kennedy’s Massachusetts Senate seat, the Sarah Palin-endorsed Scott Brown upset the heavily favored Martha Coakley and a Republican was elected in that bluest of blue states for the first time in decades.

Brown immediately became the poster child for the defeat of the Democrats’ health care reform legislation (despite the fact that he voted in favor of the passage of the very same law while he was a Massachusetts state representative just 4 years earlier). He failed. The Democrats passed the health care reform law despite Brown’s so-called “41st vote” by means of utilizing the reconciliation procedure. Brown’s status continued to decline within conservative circles when he shunned appearing with Sarah Palin at her Boston Tea Party rally. Thereafter, he really started pissing-off the Tea Baggers when he began voting with Democrats on a job creation bill and the sweeping financial regulation package. Scott Brown’s star was fading in Republican circles.

No longer was Scott Brown one of the “go-to” guys for a Fox News soundbyte. All talk of a future Republican bid for President had ceased. The Republican Senate leadership even unceremoniously evicted him from Ted Kennedy’s cushy Capitol office space and banished him to a cubby-hole in a separate building. Jeesh, what does a former Tea Party star have to do to get some attention in the Beltway?

Let’s see. He could get involved in a sex scandal like fellow Republicans David Vitter, Larry Craig, Mark Sanford, Mark Foley or John Boehner (pronounced “boner”). But no, that would be too predictable and stale these days. Wait a minute, he could take the opposite approach. He could play the role of a victim of a sexual predator.

And voila! Scott Brown has just injected himself back into the public spotlight by revealing in an interview with CBS‘ “60 Minutes” that he was sexually abused at the age of 10. CNN reports today that he said,

“Fortunately, nothing was ever fully consummated so to speak. It was certainly, back then, very traumatic. “He [the perpetrator] said, ‘If you tell anybody, I’ll kill you. I’ll make sure nobody believes you,'”.That’s the biggest thing. When people find people like me at that young vulnerable age that are basically lost. The thing that they have over you is that that they make you believe no one will believe you.”

The Boston Globe reports that the perpetrator was a male camp counselor and some of the details will be provided in Brown’s autobiography which will be released on Monday. Brown said that the molestation took place on Cape Cod at a religious camp. He did not however, disclose the name of the camp in his book, or the denomination.

“I can remember how he looked, every inch of him: his long sandy, light brown hair; his long, full mustache; the beads he wore; the tie-dyed T-shirts and the cutoff jeans, which gave him the look of a hippie,” Brown writes in the book, “Against All Odds.”

The Boston Globe further reports, Brown said the abuse occurred when he went to the camp infirmary, not feeling well. The counselor followed him into the bathroom, according to Brown’s account.

“I was standing there with my pants down and he came right up next to me and asked me if I needed help, and then he reached out his hand,” Brown writes, continuing with a graphic description of the encounter.

In his book, Brown says the incident with the counselor was not the first time he faced a potential sex abuser. In an earlier episode Brown describes, when he was about 8 and living in Malden, MA, he befriended a 13-year old boy from the neighborhood. Late one winter afternoon, the friend approached Brown in the woods, threatened him with a knife, and commanded Brown to perform a sexual act, according to Brown’s account. Feeling desperate, Brown says, he hit the teenager in the face with a rock and ran away.

“To this day,” the senator writes, “I can still see the flash of that knife blade in the woods and the thirteen-year-old boy with his pants down.”

Brown claims that he had never revealed the attacks until this interview. You have to wonder if the episodes had any influence on his past nude modeling. Too bad “60 Minutes” did not enquire into that.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Centerfold song link:


(sung to the J. Geils Band song “Centerfold”)

C’mon !
Does he walk? Does he talk?
Is he G.O.P.?
Scott Brown’s a Men’s Room angel
Larry Craig would share his seat

His buns are white like snowflakes
No underwear to stain
He poses like a sweet angel
Naked but with no brain

This sad guy loves posing in those porno magazines
He’s like a nudist angel and he’s pimping out his teens

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

Nude behind his Senate desk
This girlie man should be in a dress
Can he see that Larry Craig
Is giving him the eye

He is naked but for shoes
Much too indecent for the news
You must wear clothes on TV
They told that Scott Brown guy

Wear diapers like Dave Vitter
They do not cover  much
Or simply wear a negligee
That would be a nice touch

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

(na, na, na, na, na, na…..)

It’s okay we understand
Scott’s nudity should not be banned
But while prancing on the Senate lawn
We wish he would keep his clothes on

Take his truck, Yes he will
He’ll take that truck and drive it
He says the cab has lots of room
For his ass and his private

He says that his bod’s really ripped
He loves it when his clothes are stripped
Oh, no, Scott can’t deny it
Oh yeah, it’s time for him to diet!

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold


McCain/Palin II: Dumb And Dumber Again!

The hilarious film that inspired the sequel.

In a world where up is down, where right is left and where confused Tea-Baggers aimlessly roam our nation’s highways and by-ways, there is hope. And that hope is personified by the reunification of John McCain and Sarah Palin. Coming to a theatre near you this Spring, McCain/Palin II: Dumb and Dumber Again!

Yes, it is true. The Washington Post reports that Sarah Palin, the former Alaska governor and 2008 vice presidential candidate will join John McCain, the failed 2008 Republican nominee for president, in Phoenix on March 26 to help campaign for his re-election to the U.S. Senate. Said McCain,

I’m looking forward to getting back on the campaign trail with my former running mate, and I know my fellow Arizonans will welcome her, as well,

If this coupling sounds a bit strange to you, it most certainly is. Immediately after the addle-minded Senator and the educationally-challenged Governor were whipped like a rented mule in the 2008 presidential election, their two respective camps began to brawl like a couple of spoiled, jealous siblings. The McCain staffers claimed Palin “went rogue” and the Palin staffers claimed Palin intentionally was left in the dark. That was only the beginning. Things heated up when Palin released a ghost-written novel titled, Going Rogue in which she lambasted the McCain staff for handling her incorrectly and refusing to allow her to give a speech of her own at the time when McCain was delivering his consolation speech. Thereafter, McCain’s campaign manager described Palin’s book as a “work of fiction” and just two weeks ago appeared on television’s 60 Minutes and said that the McCain staffers felt that she was so ill prepared for the office of vice president that it was “terrifying and unfathomable.” To add fuel to the fire, when asked after the airing of 60 Minutes whether he felt the initial vetting of Palin by his staff was inadequate, McCain responded, “I wouldn’t know”. Talk about an out of touch politician?

We can only hope that this renewed union will develop into another very public family feud. Until then, please enjoy today’s song parody which describes round one of the McCain/Palin relationship.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

El Paso song link:


(sung to the Marty Robbins song “El Paso”)

Up in the Alaskan town of Wasilla
They had a guv’nor that would make you hurl
She and her husband would ride snow-machina’s
But nobody ever saw her in Juneau

She was a blight and nobody was meaner,
Wicked and evil while casting a spell
Palin was all for politics of hatin’
And her beehive was slathered in hair gel

One night old Johnny McCain came in,
Reeking and stinking of gin
Cursing and swearing,
His dentures were baring
Searching for the queen of
Snowbound Wasilla

We remember he

Searched out this stranger cuz his hopes were fadin’
He did not know that she dressed like a whore
She got a new wardrobe thanks to the RNC
But prep for debating proved too much a chore

All McCain could do was stand there in silence
Knowing his election hopes were all done
Many thoughts raced through John’s mind as he stood there
And each of them involved his using a gun

She could not name the leader of Iran,
Evolution she denied
This sure was no fun,
Her brain was a wood one
Poor Johnny Mac’s
Election hopes had died

Could he send her back

Up to the Alaskan town of Wasilla
Bury her up to her neck in the snow
Sarah Palin proved to be something worthless
The “First Dude” and his wife jokes of the left
She could not name anything she was readin’
Of intelligence, Palin was bereft

Nobody liked her except “Plumber Joe”
And that guy’s brain was in “park”
Her head was hollow
Her rhetoric slimy
This Palin was worse than a
Poisonous dart

They suffered defeat

And poor Sarah was shipped back to Wasilla
But Palin disliked the Governor show
She felt Alaska was pulling her backwards
And she developed a hatred of snow

No longer enamored by northern cowboys
And denied most of her per diem dough
Shouting and shooting, “I can’t let them catch me!”
She quit her job and just “went with the flow”

Something went dreadfully wrong for that heel
Yet she kept on winking her eyes
She kept on lying
And waging her battle
Politics of fear
Yet office denied

But her love for

Tea-Baggers was strong and when they came a callin’
She wrote a fictional book to digest
The grammar was poor and the tone was spiteful
But off to Walmart they went on a quest

She signed the books and collected her bounty
Seldom in her motorcoach did she ride
She flew in a jet till bloggers did spy her
And they exposed just one more of her lies.

The Parallel Universe Of Sarah Palin Supporters

We thought that it might be interesting to see how Sarah Palin supporters (i.e. nutcases) reacted to the bloodbath that was Sunday night’s 60 Minutes expose´ on the failed Vice Presidential nominee. Accordingly, please find below, an assortment of comments posted on the Conservatives4Palin blog. It will not be necessary for us to provide any in depth commentary, only the occasional anecdotal note because the spelling, grammar and content of these comments are entertaining on their own. Please enjoy:

the though of schmidt and cooper staring lovingly into each others eyes is too much for me to bear.

go back to sleep panchita, its a nightmare

(Huh, ???)

The reason for this interview isn’t the ’08 election.  It was just another plum of a chance to make Sarah look bad, since the dems HAVE to take her out as the unofficial leader of conservatives in this country (and a few others, for that matter).

So, A) Either McCain asked Schmidt to zip it and was ignored or B) McCain said nothing and Schmidt just reverted to form.  I’m going with “B.”  If McCain had any real regard for Sarah he would have demanded that this garbage stop.  And, if Schmidt had any respect for McLame, he would’ve listened.  Makes you wonder if he wants to continue in the same line of work or he knows that all potential clients feel the same way he does and his behavior is condoned.

(I never realized that Steve Schmidt was a Democrat. Who knew?)

Steve Schmidt is a pondscum loser who should be glad sarah treated him nicely cause if i was sarah i’d show him my boot that lackey

(When did Sarah treat him nicely? Not in her fictional book.)

Palin is rising so the LSM will do whatever it takes to bring her down. I have four words to describe this interview.

Same Shmit Different Day!

(Umm, that would be”Schmidt”)

i will be interested to see how much attention schmidt comments get at this point.  the rift between him and the governor are well known and palin covers many of this in her book-  there is no real news on palin to discuss.  i expect that we will not hear anymore on this book from Palin unless it contians some personal “revelations” about the state of the Palin marrieage or the kids that she feels  need to be corrected. certainly right now the info on Reid and the Clintons and Elzabeth Edwards are getting the most buzz.

(Love the spelling)

Uffida I enjoyed you post on the book, I wrote a bit about it on thepalination, i am not as good as most of you, but i think i got the facts in the post…as I told you last night I hit my head pretty hard there is a soft spot there now my doctor want to look at it to make sure it not a blood clot..go see about that later this afternoon.

(That soft spot might explain your incoherent comment.)

All the trials and tribulations for Sarah have been God’s Plan.  He knows it makes her stronger and us, too.

Sarah’s book debunks all of what Schmidt is saying.  She barely mentions his name.  If he was part of “Headquarters” she pretty much found a way to expose his idiocy and disingenuousness without naming him.  Judging by the way he is acting now I think she stuck in the knife and gave it a little twist.
If you recall in her book the chapter when she first meets everyone at the AZ ranch, she lets us know that she knew that she was in for a wild ride.  Since we knew the outcome she let us in on what her thought processes were.  This was totally familiar territory for her as she ecounterd the same thing in all of her dealings with polititians.  And the final nail for Schmidt and his merry band of infantiles is that she didn’t include an index.  They had to read the whole book.  Look how long it has taken them to respond, again.

(If it was “God’s plan” to have Palin chosen as the VP nominee, was it “God’s practical joke” to have her fail so miserably?)

Look, CBS knows it will never, ever get Sarah Palin on 60 Minutes, so they will trash her.

By the way, who let the troll in? Nuke the bastard.

(Of course Palin will never appear on 60 Minutes. She will never appear on any true news program with unscripted questions.)

The know Sarah is a player and they must destroy her (or try) at all cost!

(Frankenstein must be destroyed!)

If it’s any consequence, the extended playoff game between Arizona and Green Bay probably took away many viewers from CBS’s audience.

(At least some people won’t learn the truth.)


As many of you know, this Tuesday January 19th is the date of the special election to fill Ted Kennedy’s Massachusetts Senate Seat. There has not been a Republican elected to a Massachusetts seat since 1972, but the G.O.P. has gone “All In” on this race and it is presently a toss up. The Democratic Party candidate, Martha Coakley (currently the Massachusetts Attorney General) is clinging to a razor thin lead in the polls but the momentum has swung to the Republican. I cannot overemphasize the importance of this race. Health care reform hangs in the balance. If Martha Coakley does not capture the Senate seat, the Democrats will lose their filibuster-proof 60 votes and the health care reform bill will not survive the Senate vote after reconciliation. Let me repeat, if Martha Coakley does not capture the Senate seat, the Democrats will lose their filibuster-proof 60 votes and the health care reform bill will not survive the Senate vote after reconciliation.

Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off has never asked any of you fellow Rocketeers to make a financial donation of any kind to any cause in the past and we hope that we will never feel the need to do so again. That being said, we are begging you to make a contribution (no matter how small it may be or what state you may be from) to the Martha Coakley campaign immediately. The well funded Republican national interest groups are flooding the  Brown campaign with contributions to get out the vote. We owe it to our nation to match their efforts. Please, please, please, please make a contribution today to:

Martha Coakley

Democrat For U.S. Senate

We thank you in advance for your anticipated cooperation,


In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band song link:


(sung to the Beatles song “Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band”)

About twenty years ago or so,
Sarah Palin married Todd her beau
They’ve been trying to enhance her style
With rimless glasses and a great big smile
So may I introduce to you
The folks you’ve known for all these years,
Sarah Palin’s crazy brain-dead clan.

We’re Sarah Palin’s crazy brain-dead clan,
The folks that you’ve all come to know
We’re Sarah Palin’s crazy brain-dead clan,
You wouldn’t want to be our foe.

Sarah Palin’s crazy, Sarah Palin’s crazy,
Sarah Palin’s crazy brain-dead clan.

There’s Bristol and there’s Levi
Good Ole Mike Wooten too
And don’t forget our pal Wayne Ross,
We’d love to take him home with us,
We’d love to take him home.

We don’t really want to end this song,
But Todd’s sister just fired up the bong
And the travel agent’s on the phone,
Seems Sarah’s flying off to Rome

So let us bid adieu, to you
And we’ll see you in about two years
We’re Sarah Palin’s Crazy Brain-Dead Clan.

Sarah Palin: A Pox On Fox

Palin will host new Fox News game shows like "Wheel of Stupid"

Once again we must remind you that sometimes this stuff just writes itself. Only one day after she was exposed as a bewildered, ignorant liar on television’s 60 Minutes, Sarah Palin has announced that she has accepted employment with Fox News. You would have thought that this marriage would have been consummated immediately after Palin quit her last job as governor of Alaska back in July, but Fox News executives have informed us that there is a pre-condition to employment with the network. All employees must first have been exposed as complete frauds, liars or deemed stupid by at least fifty credible sources before they are qualified to work on Fox. Fortunately for Palin, the 60 Minutes segment covered all three categories and was the fiftieth qualified news source to do so. So, without further adieu, let’s give a rousing welcome to Sarah Palin.

Palin will join other celebrated Fox News liars, cowards, college drop outs and racists such as Glenn Beck (liar, college drop out and racist), Bill O’Reilly (liar, racist and sex offender) and Sean Hannity (liar, college drop out, racist and coward). The Wall Street Journal’s (which like Fox News, is owned by Australian Rupert Murdoch) reports that,

Palin, for her part, now has an opportunity to appear as an expert commentator on political and family issues. This enables her to stay in the public eye prior to the 2012 presidential election.

Yes, you read that correctly, Fox News considers the educationally and phonetically challenged half term governor with a formerly unwed pregnant teen daughter and other children that seldom attend school to be an “expert commentator on political and family issues”. They should have more accurately said an “expert commentator on grade school level political and dysfunctional family issues”. But as Fox always says, why quibble over facts?

Apparently, Palin will not be getting her own show, but in addition to appearing as a frequent guest host or contributor, reports that she could also wind up hosting an occasional series. Perhaps that will include hosting a new lineup of Fox News game shows such as Wheel of Stupid, Palin Family Feud, Career in Jeopardy, Neither Truth Nor Consequences or Lack Of Concentration. No matter what her role may evolve to be however, it is only a matter of time (and probably a very short period of time) before Sarah Palin labels Fox News as part of the elitist liberal media and then quits her newest job. Stay tuned.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Fox On The Run song link:


(sung to the Sweet song “Fox On The Run”)

Why is that network insane
No one there has a brain
So easy to abhor
Each day they add a new pretty face
But they’re losing in the gene pool race
They speak like sidewalk whores

Fox on the run
They scream and everybody starts a-running
Beck, Britt Hume and big Bill O’Reilly
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.

Koo-Koo, that is the Fox network brand
As “fair and balanced” as DisneyLand
So easy to ignore
News, that is so God damned lame
Should hide their heads in shame
And show their hosts the door

Fox on the run
They scream and everybody starts a-running
Beck, Britt Hume and big Bill O’Reilly
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.

(musical interlude)

F-foxy, Fox is on the run
They scream and think that we’re having fun
Take a run and hide yourself away
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.

Sarah Palin Is An Ignorant, Lying Schizophrenic

The Palinistas must be apoplectic at the moment. That pesky mainstream media has finally exposed Sarah Palin as the dishonest, conniving, plain stupid, schizophrenic fool that she is. And what better program to drive the stake into the blood-sucking former ex-quitting governor of Alaska than the award winning 60 Minutes and during prime-time to boot? Ouch, that is going to leave a very visible mark!

As everyone certainly knows by now, last night’s show featured a segment during which former John McCain Campaign Manager Steve Schmidt simply eviscerated Palin. It is always entertaining to watch Republicans eat their own, but this was particularly delicious because Schmidt actually had full insider access to Palin and her multiple idiosyncrasies for the entire time that she was part of the failed presidential ticket. He witnessed her bewildering and perplexing behavior on a daily basis. Consequently, he knows that portion of Palin’s life better than any other person not related to her and possibly better than some of them also, too. The segment also included unflattering revelations about Palin from the authors of the soon to be released (and fact checked) Game Change, Mark Halperin and John Heinemann.

So, where to begin? I know, let’s start with Sarah Palin’s…

Lack Of Knowledge

Mark Halperin said that even after crash-course tutorials by campaign aides following the convention, Palin was still woefully uninformed about basic policy issues.

[S]he still didn’t really understand why there was a North Korea and a South Korea. She was still regularly saying that Saddam Hussein had been behind 9/11.

Steve Schmidt added that she hurt herself in the now-infamous interview with CBS’s Katie Couric by not adequately preparing and letting herself be distracted by what the authors describe as an obsession about her political standing in Alaska.

Steve Schmidt stated that Sarah Palin was dishonest as the GOP’s vice-presidential nominee and that her untruths have done long-term damage to her public image. More specifically, he said,

There were numerous instances that she said things that were – that were not accurate that ultimately, the campaign had to deal with, and that opened the door to criticism that she was being untruthful and inaccurate. And I think that is something that continues to this day.”

Schmidt then referred to an Alaskan ethics complaint filed against Palin which held that she had improperly abused her powers as governor. he said,

She went out and said, you know, ‘This report completely exonerates me,’” Schmidt said. “And in fact, it – it didn’t. You know it’s the equivalent of saying down is up and up is down. It was provably, demonstrably untrue.

Dual Personality

Perhaps the strangest of all the revelations about Sarah Palin however, was that she had two distinct personalities. Schmidt explained the two Palins as the bubbly, exuberant, self confident public person and the morose, glassy eyed, confused private person. Schmidt referred to the second personality as “the other Sarah”. Not exactly the type of level headed person fit for the office of Vice President of the United States. Indeed, Halperin and Heinemann stated that top McCain campaign officials were prepared in the event that McCain won the election, to urge him to have Palin step down. They felt that she was so ill prepared for the office that it was “terrifying and unfathomable.”

Palin’s Response

As is her usual response, Sarah Palin refused to be interviewed for the 60 Minutes program. That was to be expected however, when one considers how poorly she performs when questioned by true news outlets with unscripted questions. After all, she has never appeared on any of the serious Sunday morning talking head programs such as Meet The Press, Face The Nation or This Week.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

I’ve Just Seen A Face song link:


(sung to the Beatles song “I’ve Just Seen A Face”)

I’ve just seen her face,
I can’t forget the time or place
I’ll make a bet, she’s trolling for a fee
Palin wants all the world to see her jet
Na na na na na na

Unemployed and without pay
She lives her life the Palin way
With winking eyes and beehive hair
She’s an Alaskan “Mama Bear” alright !
Na na na na na na

Falling, yes Sarah’s falling
And she’s appalling to sober men

Sitting on her throne
With her intelligence on loan
The G.O.P. thinks she is out of sight
Their other girls were never quite like this
Na na na na na na

Crawling, an insect crawling
And she’s appalling to sober men

(musical interlude)

Falling, yes Sarah’s falling
And she’s appalling to sober men

I’ve just seen her face
To folks like me it’s a disgrace
And better yet, I want the world to see
There is no place for Sarah P., you bet
Na na na na na na

Crawling, an insect crawling
And she’s appalling to sober men

Falling, yes Sarah’s falling
And she’s appalling to sober men

Oh, falling, yes Sarah’s falling
And she’s appalling to sober men

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 24

Just a few noteworthy news stories and comments thereon that have been orbiting the galaxies this past week.

BREAKING NEWS: There was an interesting moment on MSNBC’s Hardball With Chris Matthews this week. The guest was Republican strategist Todd Harris. He was asked by Matthews to name just one thing that the Republican party has done for the country in the last 15 to 20 years. He could not come up with one thing.

MATTHEWS: I just wanted to get the Republican bragging points straight here. So the Republican Party has kept us safe, except for 9/11. Is that the argument? No, really, because you had the worst attack on the American homeland in history, but you`re bragging about your ability to defend the country because you say — you defended America, except for 9/11. That`s your defense, right?

HARRIS: Look, Chris…

MATTHEWS: That`s the bragging point of the Republican Party for the last — I asked you to name one thing they`ve done for this country in 15 to 20 years. I`ll keep going back further. And you`re having a hard time giving me an answer. What has the Republican Party…

HARRIS: No, no. I`m…

MATTHEWS: … done for the country?

HARRIS: I`m not…

MATTHEWS: I`m just — it`s a good question.

HARRIS: Chris, I`m not having…

MCMAHON: Squandered the surplus.

HARRIS: … a hard time giving you an answer.

MCMAHON: Don`t forget, squandered the surplus.

HARRIS: When I decide to write a book about the history of the last 20 years of the Republican Party, I`ll be happy to talk to you about that.

MATTHEWS: No, just give me one…

HARRIS: My job is to win elections — my job is to…

MATTHEWS: Just give me one.

HARRIS: … win elections in 2010.


HARRIS: And I`m going to keep my eye on the ball.

MCMAHON: He doesn`t have one. He doesn`t have one!

Yikes. Harris provided a whole lotta nuthin’.

THIS JUST IN: John Michael Farren, who served as deputy legal counsel to President George W. Bush, has been charged with strangulation and attempted murder after allegedly choking his wife and beating her with a flashlight. It is believed that Farren felt pressure to one-up Dick Cheney’s crime of shooting his friend in the face.

BREAKING NEWS: If the mainstream media is truly liberal, it has done a good job of hiding that fact this week. Most every televised news program at some point this week drew attention to Democratic Party Senators Chris Dodd and Byron Dorgan’s announced retirements and concluded that the party is in real trouble because of the number of vacated seats. The problem is that the media has failed to report the true facts. Those facts are that the Republicans have six Senate incumbents that are not seeking re-election (compared to the two aforementioned Democrats) and fourteen House members doing the same (compared to ten Democrats). Final score: Republicans vacating twenty congressional seats and Democrats vacating twelve. Looks like the Republicans have some real trouble of their own.

THIS JUST IN: Would someone please tell Liz Cheney that nobody cares what she has to say. This week the daughter of the former face-shooter in chief, Dick Cheney decided that she should give her opinion on how the Obama administration should handle terrorism. She should be reminded that she has absolutely no qualifications to comment on that subject.  She would be better served by accompanying the Bush twins on the party scene. Then again, she is probably not very fun to be around.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “Republicans Eating Their Young” features Republican National Committee chairman Michael Steele and wealthy Republican contributors. It appears that the contributors’ lack of faith in Steele is manifesting itself in a dearth of contributions to the RNC. Steele has responded to his Republican critics as follows in an ABC interview:

I’m telling them and I’m looking them in the eye and say I’ve had enough of it. If you don’t want me in the job, fire me. But until then, shut up. Get with the program or get out of the way.

Sounds like the Republican Party is in need of an intervention.

THIS JUST IN: Does anyone else find it a little ironic that although Hanes has terminated actor Charlie Sheen from his endorsement contract as the result of his pending spousal abuse charges, the underwear manufacturer continues to sell “wife-beater” undershirts?

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “Don’t Sugar Coat It, Go Ahead And Tell Us How You Really Feel” features Andrew Sullivan of The who says of Sarah Palin,

But it became almost immediately clear that she knew nothing about anything, had a private life that you usually see hashed out on Judge Judy, covered up her total lack of governing competence with so many lies they were hard to keep track of, and had next-to-no knowledge of any domestic or foreign policy issues, including energy. Isn’t that enough to regard her nomination as a total farce, the biggest insult ever delivered to voters since … well, Dan Quayle, who was far more informed, smart and serious than Palin ever was.

The idea that this person was qualified to run a country in one of its most serious crises, economically and militarily, beggars belief. The recklessness it revealed in McCain showed that he too was simply unqualified for high office, gambling with the core security of the US for cheap tactical advantage.

THIS JUST IN: Vice President Joe O’Biden says to the unemployed Sarah Palin, “Stay away from me lucky charms!” More on the sorry former ex-quitting governor of Alaska tonight on 60 Minutes which will feature a scathing synopsis of the 2008 Palin campaign by McCain campaign official Steve Schmidt.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “We Can’t Seem To Get Our Heads Out Of Our Asses” features those dimwitted curmudgeons known as Tea-Baggers. In December 2009, the group known as “Tea Party Support” announced the it would be sponsoring the National Conservative Symposium from January 22 – 24 in San Antonio, Texas. The speaker lineup included Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, Michelle Malkin and Laura Ingraham. The event was reported to be a symposium for “true” conservatives and would compete directly with the more celebrated annual CPAC conference which Palin has elected to shun. The price for attendance at the Tea Party event was announced to be $ 749.00.

Unfortunately, the group ran into a little trouble on the way to Texas. The event has now been canceled with no reason for cancellation announced by the group. This is noteworthy because it is the first event that has quit on Sarah Palin before she could quit on it. The cancellation also marks the most recent disaster of the Tea-Bagging campaign. Their “Die-In” event in Washington last December was remarkable only for its lack of attendance and they cannot seem to define what the heck their planned January 20th “strike” or “boycott” is supposed to be. Somebody better read their tea leaves and soon.

OOPS, ALMOST FORGOT: Here We Go Packers, Here We Go !!!

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Honesty Impaired Fox News Hosts” features Sean “The Cowardly Waterboarding Evader” Hannity. His most recent lie is that the CIA is diverting counter terrorism resources in an attempt to prove the existence of global warming. Hannity said,

The CIA director redirects manpower to monitor climate change, but is it all the cost — at the cost of our security, your security, your family’s security? In the wake of the attempted Christmas Day terror attack, you would think the spies at the CIA, that they would have their hands full securing America. But, believe it or not, assets at Langley are being used for other projects.

Hannity then quoted a National Center For Public Policy Research (NCPPR) press release which said,

As terrorists continue to infiltrate America, the Obama Administration is tasking some of our nation’s most elite intelligence-gathering agencies to divert their resources to environmental scientists researching global warming.

Of course Hannity failed to disclose that the NCPPR is sponsored and funded by the global warming denying Exxon Oil Company. Additionally, he failed to provide the CIA’s response to the ridiculous claim which is,

The monitoring program has little or no impact on regular intelligence gathering, federal officials said, but instead releases secret information already collected or takes advantage of opportunities to record environmental data when classified sensors are otherwise idle or passing over wilderness.

That is OK Mr. Hannity. Do not let the facts get in the way of a good lie. You just go on living in your Faux News fantasy world.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Dear Mr. Fantasy song link:


(sung to the Traffic song “Dear, Mr. Fantasy”)

Dear, Mr. Hannity you are a goon
Some even say you are daffy
Your nightly show is just like a cartoon
Hit that bong, chug that jar
Getting happy
You are the one that just makes us all laugh
Unlike Glenn Beck, you don’t go to tears
You should be sad that you do not have your gonads
You could face waterboarding fears

Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh Ahhhhh

Dear Mr. Hannity you’re no Brit Hume
Although, he too is unhappy
Insanity prevails throughout Fox News
Always wrong, that you are
Oh so crappy
Yeah, yeah

(musical interlude)

Dear Mr. Hannity  go back to your room
That would just make us all happy
Do anything, take us out of our gloom
Sing a song, play guitar
Make it snappy
We all just watch you to have a good laugh
We haven’t laughed so hard in ten years
You are one sad excuse for a real college grad
Just like all of your poor Fox News peers

Sarah Palin: The Tea-Bag Hag

This week’s edition of “Matches Made In Heaven” features Sarah Palin and the Teabaggers. The educationally challenged former ex-quitting governor of Alaska has been selected to be the keynote speaker at the First Annual National Tea Party Convention which will be held in Nashville in February. This is too good to be true for us bloggers. As we have said before, Palin is the gift that keeps on giving, just like a case of herpes.

Would one of you loyal Rocketeers from the area please take one for the team and buy a ticket to the event? We would like nothing better than to have photos of the many misspelled and unintelligible signs, placards and t-shirts that are certain to be on display.  If we could also obtain a transcript or recording of Palin’s sure to be hilarious speech, we would be forever indebted to the brave soul that subjected himself/herself to such an assault on the senses.

The event should resemble an outtake from the film, “Night Of The Living Dead“. Imagine all the drool, head scratching and confusion as the conventioneers tackle such difficult tasks as finding the bathrooms and remembering their hotel room numbers. They will rail against socialized programs as they fight to defend their socialized Medicare benefits. They will miss work and lose wages as they fight for tax cuts for their bosses. Eventually, Palin will deliver the closing speech in which she is certain to try to explain the fiction of “death panels” and why she cannot remember Joe Biden’s name. Finally Glenn Beck will take to the stage and announce that the attendance was greater than twenty million. This is the stuff of which comedians dream.

For more on Sarah Palin’s stupidity, do not forget to watch 60 Minutes tomorrow night. John McCain campaign manager, Steve Schmidt will dissect and analyze the lying Palin’s “debacle of historic and epic proportions”. Oh boy, get out your popcorn for this one.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below so as to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Magical Mystery Tour song link:


(sung to The Beatles song “Magical Mystery Tour”)

Roll up, roll up for the tragical misery tour. Step right this way.

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up AND THAT’S AN INVITATION, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, DON’T NEED NO EDUCATION, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour is eating your brain cells away
Eating your brain cells away

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, WE DON’T CARE IF YOU CAN’T READ, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, SO LONG AS YOU CAN SCREAM, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour will even pay you for the day
Even pay you for the day

(The misery trip is waiting)

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, TO MAKE A RESERVATION, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, FOR INSANE CONVERSATION, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour wants insurers to keep their payday
Please help them to have their way
The tragical misery tour is hoping that you die away
After you make your co-pay, make your co-pay