Blog Archives

Hey, Did You Hear What (fill in name of conservative pundit here) Said This Week?

Sean Hanitty (Fox News): The elimination of Osama bin Laden “wouldn’t have happened if he (President Barack Obama) had his way”;

Ann Coulter: At CPAC she said, “Voters with forty years of politically correct education are ecstatic to have the first black president. They just love the idea even if we did get Flavor Flav instead of Thomas Sowell.”;

Liz Trotta (Fox News): While commenting on the recent Pentagon report which reveals that there has been a 64% increase in violent sexual assaults in the military, Trotta said, “Well, what did they expect? These people are in close contact…That’s funny, I thought the mission of the armed forces was to defend and protect us, not the people who were fighting the war.”;

Fox Business Network: Sometimes actions speak louder than words. Such is the case with the Fox Business Network who’s executives responded to poor ratings by firing its entire prime-time lineup and replacing them with re-runs of other programs;

Charles Gasparino (Fox News): Referred to the recently announced $26 billion foreclosure malfeasance settlement as a “deadbeat bailout”;

Laura Ingraham (Radio): “Don’t you love it when people come to CPAC and they don’t really have access to conservatives? And I’m not talking about Governor Romney by the way.”;

Bill O’Reilly (Fox News): “Can you make fun of a gay person in this country? Can you just make a joke about a gay person? … Can you mock a gay person and your organization, other organizations — would you be OK with that if it’s just done in a casual, allegedly humorous way?”;

Glenn Beck (Radio): “I want to talk a little bit about the parallels between the Obama administration and the FDR administration as it comes into play with communists. We have Marxists, Maoists, communists in and around the White House influencing and actually working with [it]. We had that with FDR. Both denied it at the time.”

Sarah Palin (Fox News): “That glowing enthusiasm isn’t there yet. I believe a lot of that is in part the idea that it’s a foregone conclusion that Mitt Romney will be the GOP pick. He certainly has the establishment support and much of the media support. I also believe that he is the one that President Obama would love to debate and to run against in November.”;

Rush Limbaugh (Radio): “…as I’ve been saying the past couple of weeks, if you’re looking for a conservative who is the least corrupted, who has the least number of periods of wandering off the reservation, if you’re looking for a conservative who’s never sat down with Nancy Pelosi on the couch for any reason, you get Rick Santorum.  And people know this.”

Andrew Brietbart (Publisher-Videographer): The conservative pundit who doctored the infamous ACORN tapes  and the Shirley Sherrod tapes and was caught, appeared at the OCCUPY CPAC protest and had a complete and total public meltdown, which ironically, was caught on tape and has not been edited.
How is that for a week’s worth of right-wing crazy!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

AM Radio song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDiCJkITtes&feature=player_embedded

RIGHT WING RADIO

(sung to the Everclear song “AM Radio”)

Portions of this lame programming are reproduced
By means of electronical transcriptions or tape recordings.

Radio
You can hear that bullshit on the right wing radio

There’s Ann Coulter and Sean Hannity
There’s lots of that Glenn Beck’s crap
Heavy on insanity

It’s simulcast along
The world wide webs

They’re pouring out pitchers full of Kool-Aid
Through the internets grid

Tea-Bagging clowns
On the air waves

Won’t talk to you if you’re black, young or gay

Limbaugh taught ‘em
The EIB chair
Is so toxic and vile
And it is unbalanced and unfair

Yo!
You must listen
To the poison on
That right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Yeah… there’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)

Savage is without a clue
Steers clear of every single neighborhood
In a state if that state is “Blue”

Malkin
Makes an ungodly sound
Crazy shit she’s into
Cruisin’ with that Glenn Beck clown

These nuts are broadcast across the nation
To the dumb and poor
Who mimic them like apes

They’re all right their at prime-time
Sean Hannity looks fried
Bill O’Reilly and that Sarah P. lie all goddamn night

Don’t lie in bed with the radio on
You will lose your sanity before long
When you hear Glenn Beck and his song

There’s lots of hate
And you can hear it
On that right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Yeah… there’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)

Listen to Limbaugh say
“Boy…Let’s bring Obama down!”

Oh no, “The Glenn Beck” show again.
I don’t wanna hear that show
Talk about “end times” and socialism, man, he such a fool
Turn it off
(Turn it off, turn it off, turn it off)

Sean Hannity is on at five
I feel like throwing up
When he spins
All that lame jive
Lives in a bubble where he is “the man”
Can’t be trusted
Cuz he lies
Like Glenn Beck and that’s a fact, man

Remember way back in two-thousand-seven
They said Romney and his cohorts
Would be leading us to heaven
If ol’ Rush Limbaugh
Could have had his way
“Operation Chaos”
Would have had Hilary Clinton
On election day
Hey!
Election day!
Hey!
No way!
Hey Rush, go away!

There must be a place we can tell them to go
A real hot place where they don’t have any snow
But they’re sure to have right wing radio

Huh-uh huh-uh huh-uh huh

Yeah, things get real stupid
On those stupid shows
The hosts are really daffy

There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)
There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)
There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
…No I never liked (right wing radio) disco! (right wing radio)
Nooooo (right wing radio) oooooo! (right wing radio)
(right wing radio, right wing radio)
Nooooooo!
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

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A Saturday List To Think About And Comment Upon

Please read this list and then describe what thought comes to mind in the comment section:

  • Glenn Beck
  • Ron Paul
  • Rush Limbaugh
  • Donald Trump
  • Michelle Malkin
  • Newt Gingrich
  • Ann Coulter
  • Michele Bachmann
  • Sean Hannity
  • Sarah Palin
  • Laura Ingraham
  • Rand Paul
  • Tucker Carlson
  • Rudi Giuliani
  • Christine O’Donnell
  • Larry Craig
  • Michael Savage
  • David Vitter
  • Scott Brown
  • Dick Morris
  • Fox News
  • Dick Cheney
  • Tea Party

Here’s what comes to my mind:

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Strangers In The Night song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlSbSKNk9f0&feature=related

STRANGE ONES ON THE RIGHT

(sung to the Frank Sinatra song “Strangers In The Night”)

Strange ones on the right,
Fox News romancers
Not so very bright,
With our finances
This Tea Party love
Should be viewed as taboo

Palin shouting lies
And fear inciting
Rand Paul is hostile
And so damn frightening
Boehner has no heart
McConnell has no clue

Strange ones on the right,
Abnormal people
They are strange ones on the right
Not one sane moment
They should be in a freak-show
Little do they know
It would just enhance our day
If like Bristol they’d dance away and –

And on Fox every night,
They’re all together
Lovers on the right
In love forever
It’s an ugly sight
Those strange ones on the right

(Tea-Bagging break)

Don’t look now just glance away
Here comes their jailbird Tom Delay

You can join their fight
And hang together
Only if you’re white
Birds of a feather
Taking their last flight
Those strange ones on the right

Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin: “Boobs” Who Hate Healthy Children

Moonbat-crazy Michele Bachman, a Teapublican Rep. from Minnesota, is shooting off her mouth yet again. The potential (but doomed) presidential candidate appeared with radical right-wing radio host Laura Ingraham on Tuesday’s show and feigned shock that First Lady Michelle Obama would once again advocate on behalf of healthy children. Apparently, Bachmann hates healthy children.

Recently, Michelle Obama continued her efforts to reduce childhood obesity by promoting breast feeding. Additionally, the IRS has just announced that the cost of nursing supplies that aide in the practice will be tax-deductible. The First Lady explained to reporters last week, “We also want to focus on the important touch points in a child’s life. And what we’re learning now is that early intervention is key. Breastfeeding. Kids who are breastfed longer have a lower tendency to be obese.” Her spokeswoman Kristina Schake added, “Breastfeeding is a very personal choice for every woman. We are trying to make it easier for those who choose to do it.”

Sounds reasonable doesn’t it? Ms. Obama would like to encourage mothers to breastfeed their children so that they can potentially cut into the child obesity epidemic and the children can then live healthier adult lives. Furthermore, she would like to make it easier (i.e. less costly) for mothers to continue the practice by means of providing tax relief equal to the cost of the required supplies. A win-win. Healthier children and tax relief! Sounds like a plan right out of the tax-cutting, family-values Tea Party handbook.

But wait! We have a dilemma here. Another Teapublican rule is that members must oppose anything and everything promoted by the Obama administration regardless of its merit. Michele Bachmann is the Tea Party champion when it comes to obstinence. If Barack Obama suddenly switched parties and became a Republican, Bachmann would become a Democrat. How else can you explain her shocking opposition to this proposed tax relief? In her typical over-the-top and nonsensical language, Bachmann said that the Obama breastfeeding initiative amounts to a “new definition [of] the nanny state.” She told Ingraham,

“This is very consistent with where the hard left is coming from. For them, government is the answer to every problem. I’ve given birth to five babies and I breast fed every single one of these babies.To think that government has to go out and buy my breast pump for my babies? You wanna talk about the nanny state, I think you just got a new definition.”

Fade in, the sound of crickets. Michelle Bachmann makes as much sense as Sarah Palin did when, on her reality TV show, the former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska criticized the First Lady for advocating a healthy diet. Bachmann, Palin and their ilk are simply imbeciles. They fail to understand that when the government promotes a healthy life-style, it is not forcing or coercing members of the public to engage in one. When Predident John F. Kennedy famously said, “ask what you can do for your country”, he was not forcing America’s youth to seek government employment. Indeed, the government’s promotion of a healthy lifestyle is no different than the government’s issuance of storm preparation procedures prior to a hurricane. In these instances the government is simply looking out for the people’s best interests by suggesting (not commanding) a plan of action.

Michele Bachmann and Sarah Palin could each use a refresher course in junior-high civics.

Bonus: If you would like to read how Michele Bachmann was finally forced to admit that the Republican House has no ability to defund the new health care reform law after she lied all through election season that it could be defunded, click here.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Foxy Lady song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DnkYatAT7NE

FOXY LADIES

(sung to the Jimi Hendrix song “Foxy Lady”)

Foxy
Foxy

These two, they’re a couple of smart-fakers
Foxy
But they’re just a couple of hate-mongers
Foxy

Fox makes them feel at home
Do they have any charm? No!
But they’re on all the time, prime-time
Ooh, Foxy ladies

Foxy
Foxy

Palin, she’s just so spiteful and mean
Ooh, Foxy
She makes us wanna get up and scream
Foxy
And Michele Bachmann now
Has just lost her mind
They’re both just wasting all our precious time
But Fox thinks they’re fine, so fine
Foxy Ladies
They’re so dumb

Foxy
Foxy
Foxy
Foxy

Yeah, just listen to them drone
As they sound they’re alarms, Whoa
Fox says they are so fine, prime-time
Foxy ladies

They’re just dumb ladies
We’d love to forget ya
Foxy ladies
You’re both no good
Yeah, Foxy
You’re both so dumb
Foxy
Sour lemonade
You’re spreadin’ fear. Yikes
Night and day on Foxy
Foxy
Foxy ladies
Foxy ladies

Palin To Receive “Just Desserts” For Attacks Against First Lady?

One is smart and one's a tart!

As was revealed last week, three national polls indicate that in a head-to-head match-up against Barack Obama for the 2012 Presidency, Palin would be shellacked. Each of those polls showed Obama winning by double digits with one poll giving him a whopping 22 point advantage. Palin admitted on Friday’s episode of Good Morning America that the poll results were “lousy”.

So what does the “Queen of Quit” do in an attempt to rehabilitate her blemished image? Does she “reload not retreat” and continue with her attacks against the President? Of course not. She now realizes that that tactic is failing. Consequently, the ex-former, quitting, half-term Governor of Alaska has set her sights on a different target. She can’t hurt the President personally, so she has now initiated a cat-fight and turned on his wife, the First Lady. Meow!

Is Palin unaware that Michelle Obama enjoys the highest positive ratings of just about anybody in the public eye? That means that it would be even more difficult to tarnish her public image than that of the President’s. Moreover, Palin has elected to criticize Michelle Obama’s signature public policy mission which is to educate families and children about the negative effects of obesity and help them to choose a more healthy diet. A sane rational person might deduce that the First Lady’s mission is both beneficial to the general health of our nation and wildly popular with parents who must compete on a daily basis with massive corporations touting sugar and fat laden foods that are tantamount to a heart attack in a box. A sane rational person might understand that obesity is pervasive as is evidenced by reality television shows such as “The Biggest Loser”. A sane rational person would also connect the dots and understand that a healthier population would help bring down the skyrocketing costs of medical treatment which are handcuffing our nation. A sane rational person, at the very least, would realize that promoting a healthy diet is not a bad thing. Sarah Palin however, is not a sane rational person.

In a blatant swipe at Ms. Obama in Sunday’s episode of her un-reality television show, “Sarah Palin’s Alaska”, Palin was shown making s’mores and she proclaims the marshmallow and chocolate treat is “in honor of Michelle Obama, who said the other day we should not have dessert.” Of course that is not in any way what the First Lady actually said. Sarah Palin of course, misconstrues the words of others as much as she butchers the English language. Michelle Obama actually said this,

“In the afternoon, there was no way we’d be allowed to lie around the house watching TV. Our parents made us get up and play outside. As I tell my kids, dessert is not a right.”

Once again, a sane rational person would understand that Michelle Obama was simply explaining that tasty desserts should be earned by physical activities which reduce the ill effects of the sugary treats. Once again however, Sarah Palin has demonstrated that she is not a sane rational person.

CNN informs us that this was not not the first time Palin has taken a job at Mrs. Obama over her campaign to discourage fattening foods, especially from public schools. The former vice presidential nominee told conservative talk radio host Laura Ingraham last month that “the first lady cannot trust parents to make decisions for their own children, for their own families in what we should eat.” Palin also hand-delivered cookies to a Pennsylvania school last month before delivering a speech there, saying: “Who should be deciding what I eat? Should it be government or should it be parents? It should be the parents.”

Sarah Palin is a buffoon. After all, what sane rational parent would object to healthy food being fed to their children at public school rather than unhealthy fat-laden foods? Would Palin also object to those school crossing guards on the grounds that, “Who should be deciding when my child crosses the street? Should it be government or should it be parents?” Probably.

In addition to the futility of her attacks against promoting a healthy diet for children, Palin has also been exposed as a hypocrite. Whatever happened to her edict that family members should be “off limits” in the world of political debate? Palin has violated her very own golden rule by attacking the President’s wife. After all, he is the elected official, not Michelle. What would her response be if Barack Obama criticized daughter Bristol’s teen abstinence campaign as “closing the door after the horse has fled the barn”? Would she play the victim card yet again? You betcha!

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Santa Claus Is Coming To Town song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ky4wu58XTr4

SARAH PALIN’S COMING TO TOWN

(sung to the Patti Page version of “Santa Claus Is Coming To Town”)

Get your wallet out
Wink and blink your eyes
Holler and shout
At protesting guys
Sarah Palin’s coming to town

Your town’s on her list
So you must play nice
And listen to Sarah P.’s advice
Sarah Palin’s coming to town

She’ll fleece you while your sleeping
Your money she will take
She’ll force you to purchase her book
Although the story’s fake

Oh, get your money out
So that you can buy
Can’t be without
Her book full of lies
Sarah Palin’s coming to town

Sarah Palin’s coming to town

Sarah Palin’s coming to town

The crap she serves is heaping
The truth she does forsake
The writing is so bad it’s good
For a laugh you should partake

Sarah Palin’s coming to town

Oh, don’t make Sarah pout
Don’t make Sarah cry
Don’t go without
Her book full of lies
Sarah Palin’s coming to town

Your town’s on her list
So you must play nice
And listen to Sarah P.’s advice
Sarah Palin’s coming to town

The crap she serves is heaping
The truth she does forsake
The writing is so bad it’s good
For a laugh you should partake

Oh, don’t make Sarah pout
Don’t make Sarah cry
Don’t go without
Her book full of lies
Sarah Palin’s coming to town

Right Wing Radio Awkwardly Silent About Olbermann

Now that the MSNBC/Keith Olbermann affair has been resolved, it is time to dissect and analyze conservative talk radio’s take on the situation. So, Hannity and Beck what do you have to say? Speak up, we cannot hear you? Huh? (cue up the chirping grasshopper sound effect).

As we all know by now, Keith Olbermann was briefly suspended by MSNBC when the network learned that he had made personal campaign contributions to Democratic Party candidates in violation of NBC News’ prohibition against such actions without prior network approval. NBC believes that such contributions serve to create a perception that its news department is not, dare we say, “fair and balanced”. NBC has every right to enforce company policy which it created to enhance the perception of unbiased news coverage. Fox News and right-wing talk radio, on the other hand, do not have any such policy. Those media outlets have gone “all in” on partisan cheerleading and have abandoned any pretense of unbiased news coverage. So what have the reich-wing radio personalities had to say about Keith Olbermann?

Sean Hannity refrained from discussing the Olbermann situation on his radio program. His silence spoke volumes. As Media Matters has revealed, Hannity has personally contributed to GOP candidates and regularly promotes and allows such candidates to use his show as a fundraising platform. The site exposed the following:

  • Teapublican Sharron Angle bragged that she would appear with Hannity as “part of our push” to raise $ 1 million (she lost);
  • Teapublican Christine O’Donnell was so certain of Hannity’s support that she boasted that she had him “in her back pocket” (she lost);
  • Hannity held a book signing at the Southern Republican Leadership Conference;
  • Hannity told Teapublican Meg Whitman on air that he hoped she wins (she lost);
  • Hannity made a $ 5,000.00 donation to Teapublican Michele “Moon-Bat Crazy” Bachmann’s political action committee; and
  • Hannity and his wife donated $ 9,600.00 to Republican John Gomez (he lost).

What about Glenn Beck? He too has been suspiciously silent on the subject. That is not surprising considering what the Wall Street Journal has revealed.

  • Beck has given paid radio endorsements to FreedomWorks, a Washington, D.C.-based libertarian advocacy group that worked closely with tea party groups to support dozens of conservative candidates;
  • Beck gave a backward endorsement to Teapublican Linda McMahon when he told his listeners, “Do not vote for Dick blumenthal” (she lost);
  • Beck said on air that he “agreed” with Sarah Palin’s endorsement of Teapublican Rand Paul; and
  • Beck asked Michele “Moon-Bat Crazy” Bachmann on air, “How can I help you raise money?” and “We should have a fundraiser for you, Michele”.

Anything from Rush Limbaugh? Nope. No surprise there given that he performs live-read radio commercials that urge listeners to join the Heritage Foundation, a conservative think tank, and he is pictured on the Heritage website, next to a headline that reads “Reinforce the Wave: Donate Today.” By the way, have you noticed that Limbaugh has also been silent on the topic of foreign money flooding into American election campaigns? Is that because he plans to finally keep his word and move to Costa Rica as he promised if Barack Obama was elected and heralded in such sweeping programs as Health Care and Financial reform? Let’s hope so.

Mark Levin? Well, you might recall that in 2008 he called for Olbermann to suspended because as he so eloquently phrased it, “I’m calling on MSNBC to suspend Keith Olbermann because in the middle of a war, I don’t think a phony journalist should be able to use his position to give aid and comfort to the enemy, and worse than that even, to smear the American GI. […].” Yet Levin was silent this time. Why? Well, The Wall Street Journal informs us that, “Americans for Prosperity, which spent tens of millions during the election to defeat dozens of Democratic incumbents, sponsors live-read advertisements by Mr. Levin, whose radio show reaches 8.5 million listeners.” He has also, “spoken at events sponsored by the group, wrote an introduction to an AFP distributed guide to campaign tactics.”

Laura Ingraham has said nothing either, but we can cut her a break because, strange as it may sound, she used to date Keith Olbermann. It’s true. Check it out.

Perhaps MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow summed up the situation best. She told the Daily News that Fox News has a history of “not just giving money to candidates, but actively endorsing campaigns and raising millions of dollars for politicians and political parties. Their network is run as a political operation. Ours isn’t. Yeah, Keith’s a liberal, and so am I. But we’re not a political operation – Fox is. We’re a news operation.”

Truer words have never been spoken.

Oh, and don’t forget to honor Veteran’s Day. Kiss a soldier!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

AM Radio song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDiCJkITtes&feature=player_embedded

RIGHT WING RADIO

(sung to the Everclear song “AM Radio”)

Portions of this lame programming are reproduced
By means of electronical transcriptions or tape recordings.

Radio
You can hear that bullshit on the right wing radio

There’s Ann Coulter and Sean Hannity
There’s lots of that Glenn Beck’s crap
Heavy on insanity

It’s simulcast along
The world wide webs

They’re pouring out pitchers full of Kool-Aid
Through the internets grid

Tea-Bagging clowns
On the air waves

Won’t talk to you if you’re black, young or gay

Limbaugh taught ‘em
The EIB chair
Is so toxic and vile
And it is unbalanced and unfair

Yo!
You must listen
To the poison on
That right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Yeah… there’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)

Savage is without a clue
Steers clear of every single neighborhood
In a state if that state is “Blue”

Malkin
Makes an ungodly sound
Crazy shit she’s into
Cruisin’ with that Glenn Beck clown

These nuts are broadcast across the nation
To the dumb and poor
Who mimic them like apes

They’re all right their at prime-time
Sean Hannity looks fried
Bill O’Reilly and that Sarah P. lie all goddamn night

Don’t lie in bed with the radio on
You will lose your sanity before long
When you hear Glenn Beck and his song

There’s lots of hate
And you can hear it
On that right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Yeah… there’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)

Listen to Limbaugh say
“Boy…Let’s bring Obama down!”

Oh no, “The Glenn Beck” show again.
I don’t wanna hear that show
Talk about “end times” and socialism, man, he such a fool
Turn it off
(Turn it off, turn it off, turn it off)

Sean Hannity is on at five
I feel like throwing up
When he spins
All that lame jive
Lives in a bubble where he is “the man”
Can’t be trusted
Cuz he lies
Like Glenn Beck and that’s a fact, man

Remember way back in two-thousand-seven
They said Romney and his cohorts
Would be leading us to heaven
If ol’ Rush Limbaugh
Could have had his way
“Operation Chaos”
Would have had Hilary Clinton
On election day
Hey!
Election day!
Hey!
No way!
Hey Rush, go away!

There must be a place we can tell them to go
A real hot place where they don’t have any snow
But they’re sure to have right wing radio

Huh-uh huh-uh huh-uh huh

Yeah, things get real stupid
On those stupid shows
The hosts are really daffy

There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)
There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)
There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
…No I never liked (right wing radio) disco! (right wing radio)
Nooooo (right wing radio) oooooo! (right wing radio)
(right wing radio, right wing radio)
Nooooooo!
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 56

Just a few newsworthy events (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS:  Jesse Ventura put Fox News in a death grip this week. On Thursday, the former Minnesota governor was a guest on the Joy Behar Show when he said this,

“He’s (Bill O’Reilly) a spineless puke. The whole Fox won’t have me on. The nighttime guys. I call them the three stooges, and we all know which one’s Curly. If Glenn Beck isn’t Curly Howard’s kid*…I view him and Hannity and them as the Three Stooges, because if they can’t intimidate you, they won’t have you on”

THIS JUST IN: Speaking of Fox News, two Republican insiders revealed this week that moonbat-crazy Teapublican Christine O’Donnell told them, “I’ve got Sean Hannity in my back pocket, and I can go on his show and raise money by attacking you guys.” Jeesh, talk about stating the obvious!

BREAKING NEWS: Motherjones.com reports that It’s fairly common for conservative political candidates to support eliminating the federal Department of Education. But in California, Tea Party darling and congressional candidate David Harmer has gone further. He’s advocated eliminating public schools entirely and returning education to “the way things worked through the first century of American nationhood.” You know, back when educational opportunities for poor people, African-Americans, women, the disabled, and others were, to say the least, extremely limited. Just another Tea-Bagging crackpot.

THIS JUST IN: A sure sign that aliens have invaded earth and adversely affected the minds of countless Americans is that whack-job Teapublican Michele Bachmann will report $5.4 million in 3rd quarter fundraising later this week, a figure that smashes records in Minnesota and appears to set a new national mark as well for Congressional candidates. Don’t go into the light!

BREAKING NEWS: A great limerick found on Madkane.com.

Open Limerick To The Anti-Government Crowd
By Madeleine Begun Kane

You folks who cry out for less gov
Have lots of gov programs you love:
You think Medicare’s great
And you’d surely berate
Any pol who gave SS a shove.

You hate taxes for highways and schools,
But you don’t want your kids taught by fools.
And you’re quick to unload
When your bridges corrode.
Please wake up — don’t be Tea Party tools.

THIS JUST IN: It is nearly Halloween and that means scary freaks and ghouls are in season. Need proof? Just watch Fox NewsGretchen Carlson and Laura Ingraham.

BREAKING NEWS: Not yet convinced that Teapublican Rand Paul is crazy? Watch this and then vote for Jack Conway.

THIS JUST IN: President Barack Obama came to Boston yesterday to raise funds for Democratic candidates and to stump for Massachusetts Governor, Deval Patrick. The best line of the event however was delivered by Patrick when he said, “Three years ago we worked hard to change the guard. Now we have to work hard to guard the change.”

GO PACKERS!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today;s topical song parody.

Every Kind Of People song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tEH_YYqEH0&feature=player_embedded

EVERY KIND OF PEOPLE

(sung to the Robert Palmer version of the song “Every Kind Of People”)

The far right always competes
They all lie and then misspeak
Try to keep their jobs
Fighting to land a spot on Fox

It takes every kind of people
To make that right wing sound
Every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout

We’re not sure Glenn Beck can read
Is Ann Coulter a he or is it a she?
O’Reilly seems so damn uptight
Limbaugh cannot keep a wife

Though they profit by deceit
Honest men know that
Fox will suffer defeat
If you’re anything but white
Fox News will insult you with delight

It takes every kind of people
To make that right wing sound
Every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout

(musical interlude)

You know that hate’s their only goal
They learned that long ago from Bob Dole
Hey, and they are all insane
Looking to always pass the blame

It takes every kind of people
To make that right wing sound
It takes every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout

Every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout
It takes very kind of people


Mother’s Day Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 36

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you that may be mothers. For the rest of you, please do something nice for your own mothers on her special day. You have no way of knowing how many more of these days you will have the opportunity to share together. Make the most of all of them.

OK, no more proselytizing. Let’s have some fun. Rather than the usual recap of newsworthy events from the last week, today’s post will provide a list of appropriate Mother’s Day gifts for a bunch of well known conservative women. Please feel free to add to the list in the comment section. Let’s roll…

Barbara Bush:  A “do over” regarding son George W.

Ann Coulter: A definitive male or female sexual status.

Carrie Jean Prejean:  A map of the United States.

Condoleezza Rice: A “Where’s Condi?” placemat.

Michelle Malkin:  Non-“Anchor-Baby” status.

Ohio Rep. Jean Schmidt:  An official “Birther” T-shirt.

Laura Bush: A Stepford Sister.

Conservative radio pundit Laura Ingraham: A more feminine voice.

Congressional candidate Carly Fiorina: An endorsement from Hewlett Packard directors and shareholders.

Greta Van Susteren:  A contestant’s spot on tv’s Extreme Makeover.

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer:  An all expenses paid trip to Mexico.

Liz Cheney:  A chance to show her courage via a stint in the U.S. Army.

Michele Bachmann:  An unlimited prescription of Thorazine.

Elizabeth Hasselbeck:  Employment with Fox News.

Bristol Palin:  A time machine.

Sarah Palin: An English/Palin – Palin/ English dictionary.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

American Woman song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9o8SUSy_tY

REPUBLICAN WOMEN

(sung to the Guess Who song “American Woman”)

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women, they’ve really lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Say “R”, say “E”, say “P”
Say “L”, say “I”, say “C”
Say “A” “N”

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Republican women, stay away from me
Republican women, from the G.O.P.
You are someone I’ll just ignore
I don’t wanna see your face no more
I got more important things to do
And I will never be sold on you

Now women, I said stay away

Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, have no dignity
Republican women, and their tea-parties
Like I told you the time before
Michele Bachmann is just a bore
Mann Coulter I do despise
Malkin has a lazy eye
Now women, I said get away
Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, it’s clear as day
Republican women, they’re no Tina Fey
Talk about defending our shores
Their husbands prefer time with whores
Jean Schmidt always makes a scene
Sarah Palin thinks she’s queen
Mary Matalin’s hypnotized
Ingraham’s mouth is super-sized
Now women, from the G.O.P.
Republican women, mama let me be

Go, gotta get away, gotta get away
Now go go go
Gonna leave you, women
Gonna leave you, women
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
You’re no good for me
I’m no good for you
Gonna look you right in the eye.
Tell you what I’m gonna do
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go, women
I’m gonna leave, women
Goodbye, Republican women

A Tasty Morsel From The Meg Whitman Sampler

Meg Whitman: California's next Republican Governor?

Meg Whitman: California's next Governor?

Republican candidate for Governor of California, Meg Whitman is a disaster. This is a woman that is seeking the highest elective office in the nation’s most populous state even though she has failed to cast a vote in most every election since she reached the age of majority. She is often credited with piloting the internet auction site Ebay to extraordinary growth and success. Perhaps then, if elected she will act like most every other Republican politician and auction herself off to the highest corporate bidder.

Whitman pulled a doozy this week when she called a press conference and then refused to give the press access to the event let alone the opportunity to ask questions. Last Thursday she announced an “open press” stop in Oakland. Reporters from television, print and radio media showed up at the event at a Union Pacific Railroad facility. Once there however, the reporters were herded into a room and not allowed to view her tour of the facility. Thereafter, her staffers announced that she would take no questions from the press.

If this nutjob is elected, Californians should have their heads examined.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

American Woman song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9o8SUSy_tY

REPUBLICAN WOMEN

(sung to the Guess Who song “American Woman”)

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women, they’ve really lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Say “R”, say “E”, say “P”
Say “L”, say “I”, say “C”
Say “A” “N”

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Republican women, stay away from me
Republican women, from the G.O.P.
You are someone I’ll just ignore
I don’t wanna see your face no more
I got more important things to do
And I will never be sold on you

Now women, I said stay away

Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, have no dignity
Republican women, and their tea-parties
Like I told you the time before
Michele Bachmann is just a bore
Mann Coulter I do despise
Malkin has a lazy eye
Now women, I said get away
Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, it’s clear as day
Republican women, they’re no Tina Fey
Talk about defending our shores
Their husbands prefer time with whores
Jean Schmidt always makes a scene
Sarah Palin thinks she’s queen
Mary Matalin’s hypnotized
Ingraham’s mouth is super-sized

Now women, from the G.O.P.
Republican women, mama let me be

Go, gotta get away, gotta get away
Now go go go
Gonna leave you, women
Gonna leave you, women
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye

You’re no good for me
I’m no good for you
Gonna look you right in the eye.
Tell you what I’m gonna do
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go, women

I’m gonna leave, women
Goodbye, Republican women

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 24

Just a few noteworthy news stories and comments thereon that have been orbiting the galaxies this past week.

BREAKING NEWS: There was an interesting moment on MSNBC’s Hardball With Chris Matthews this week. The guest was Republican strategist Todd Harris. He was asked by Matthews to name just one thing that the Republican party has done for the country in the last 15 to 20 years. He could not come up with one thing.

MATTHEWS: I just wanted to get the Republican bragging points straight here. So the Republican Party has kept us safe, except for 9/11. Is that the argument? No, really, because you had the worst attack on the American homeland in history, but you`re bragging about your ability to defend the country because you say — you defended America, except for 9/11. That`s your defense, right?

HARRIS: Look, Chris…

MATTHEWS: That`s the bragging point of the Republican Party for the last — I asked you to name one thing they`ve done for this country in 15 to 20 years. I`ll keep going back further. And you`re having a hard time giving me an answer. What has the Republican Party…

HARRIS: No, no. I`m…

MATTHEWS: … done for the country?

HARRIS: I`m not…

MATTHEWS: I`m just — it`s a good question.

HARRIS: Chris, I`m not having…

MCMAHON: Squandered the surplus.

HARRIS: … a hard time giving you an answer.

MCMAHON: Don`t forget, squandered the surplus.

HARRIS: When I decide to write a book about the history of the last 20 years of the Republican Party, I`ll be happy to talk to you about that.

MATTHEWS: No, just give me one…

HARRIS: My job is to win elections — my job is to…

MATTHEWS: Just give me one.

HARRIS: … win elections in 2010.

MATTHEWS: OK.

HARRIS: And I`m going to keep my eye on the ball.

MCMAHON: He doesn`t have one. He doesn`t have one!

Yikes. Harris provided a whole lotta nuthin’.

THIS JUST IN: John Michael Farren, who served as deputy legal counsel to President George W. Bush, has been charged with strangulation and attempted murder after allegedly choking his wife and beating her with a flashlight. It is believed that Farren felt pressure to one-up Dick Cheney’s crime of shooting his friend in the face.

BREAKING NEWS: If the mainstream media is truly liberal, it has done a good job of hiding that fact this week. Most every televised news program at some point this week drew attention to Democratic Party Senators Chris Dodd and Byron Dorgan’s announced retirements and concluded that the party is in real trouble because of the number of vacated seats. The problem is that the media has failed to report the true facts. Those facts are that the Republicans have six Senate incumbents that are not seeking re-election (compared to the two aforementioned Democrats) and fourteen House members doing the same (compared to ten Democrats). Final score: Republicans vacating twenty congressional seats and Democrats vacating twelve. Looks like the Republicans have some real trouble of their own.

THIS JUST IN: Would someone please tell Liz Cheney that nobody cares what she has to say. This week the daughter of the former face-shooter in chief, Dick Cheney decided that she should give her opinion on how the Obama administration should handle terrorism. She should be reminded that she has absolutely no qualifications to comment on that subject.  She would be better served by accompanying the Bush twins on the party scene. Then again, she is probably not very fun to be around.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “Republicans Eating Their Young” features Republican National Committee chairman Michael Steele and wealthy Republican contributors. It appears that the contributors’ lack of faith in Steele is manifesting itself in a dearth of contributions to the RNC. Steele has responded to his Republican critics as follows in an ABC interview:

I’m telling them and I’m looking them in the eye and say I’ve had enough of it. If you don’t want me in the job, fire me. But until then, shut up. Get with the program or get out of the way.

Sounds like the Republican Party is in need of an intervention.

THIS JUST IN: Does anyone else find it a little ironic that although Hanes has terminated actor Charlie Sheen from his endorsement contract as the result of his pending spousal abuse charges, the underwear manufacturer continues to sell “wife-beater” undershirts?

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “Don’t Sugar Coat It, Go Ahead And Tell Us How You Really Feel” features Andrew Sullivan of The Atlantic.com who says of Sarah Palin,

But it became almost immediately clear that she knew nothing about anything, had a private life that you usually see hashed out on Judge Judy, covered up her total lack of governing competence with so many lies they were hard to keep track of, and had next-to-no knowledge of any domestic or foreign policy issues, including energy. Isn’t that enough to regard her nomination as a total farce, the biggest insult ever delivered to voters since … well, Dan Quayle, who was far more informed, smart and serious than Palin ever was.

The idea that this person was qualified to run a country in one of its most serious crises, economically and militarily, beggars belief. The recklessness it revealed in McCain showed that he too was simply unqualified for high office, gambling with the core security of the US for cheap tactical advantage.

THIS JUST IN: Vice President Joe O’Biden says to the unemployed Sarah Palin, “Stay away from me lucky charms!” More on the sorry former ex-quitting governor of Alaska tonight on 60 Minutes which will feature a scathing synopsis of the 2008 Palin campaign by McCain campaign official Steve Schmidt.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “We Can’t Seem To Get Our Heads Out Of Our Asses” features those dimwitted curmudgeons known as Tea-Baggers. In December 2009, the group known as “Tea Party Support” announced the it would be sponsoring the National Conservative Symposium from January 22 – 24 in San Antonio, Texas. The speaker lineup included Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, Michelle Malkin and Laura Ingraham. The event was reported to be a symposium for “true” conservatives and would compete directly with the more celebrated annual CPAC conference which Palin has elected to shun. The price for attendance at the Tea Party event was announced to be $ 749.00.

Unfortunately, the group ran into a little trouble on the way to Texas. The event has now been canceled with no reason for cancellation announced by the group. This is noteworthy because it is the first event that has quit on Sarah Palin before she could quit on it. The cancellation also marks the most recent disaster of the Tea-Bagging campaign. Their “Die-In” event in Washington last December was remarkable only for its lack of attendance and they cannot seem to define what the heck their planned January 20th “strike” or “boycott” is supposed to be. Somebody better read their tea leaves and soon.

OOPS, ALMOST FORGOT: Here We Go Packers, Here We Go !!!

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Honesty Impaired Fox News Hosts” features Sean “The Cowardly Waterboarding Evader” Hannity. His most recent lie is that the CIA is diverting counter terrorism resources in an attempt to prove the existence of global warming. Hannity said,

The CIA director redirects manpower to monitor climate change, but is it all the cost — at the cost of our security, your security, your family’s security? In the wake of the attempted Christmas Day terror attack, you would think the spies at the CIA, that they would have their hands full securing America. But, believe it or not, assets at Langley are being used for other projects.

Hannity then quoted a National Center For Public Policy Research (NCPPR) press release which said,

As terrorists continue to infiltrate America, the Obama Administration is tasking some of our nation’s most elite intelligence-gathering agencies to divert their resources to environmental scientists researching global warming.

Of course Hannity failed to disclose that the NCPPR is sponsored and funded by the global warming denying Exxon Oil Company. Additionally, he failed to provide the CIA’s response to the ridiculous claim which is,

The monitoring program has little or no impact on regular intelligence gathering, federal officials said, but instead releases secret information already collected or takes advantage of opportunities to record environmental data when classified sensors are otherwise idle or passing over wilderness.

That is OK Mr. Hannity. Do not let the facts get in the way of a good lie. You just go on living in your Faux News fantasy world.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Dear Mr. Fantasy song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vxVlN-LzIks

DEAR, MR. HANNITY

(sung to the Traffic song “Dear, Mr. Fantasy”)

Dear, Mr. Hannity you are a goon
Some even say you are daffy
Your nightly show is just like a cartoon
Hit that bong, chug that jar
Getting happy
You are the one that just makes us all laugh
Unlike Glenn Beck, you don’t go to tears
You should be sad that you do not have your gonads
You could face waterboarding fears

Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh Ahhhhh

Dear Mr. Hannity you’re no Brit Hume
Although, he too is unhappy
Insanity prevails throughout Fox News
Always wrong, that you are
Oh so crappy
Yeah, yeah

(musical interlude)

Dear Mr. Hannity  go back to your room
That would just make us all happy
Do anything, take us out of our gloom
Sing a song, play guitar
Make it snappy
We all just watch you to have a good laugh
We haven’t laughed so hard in ten years
You are one sad excuse for a real college grad
Just like all of your poor Fox News peers

Rush Limbaugh’s Holiday Death Squads

The Twelve Days of Christmas Song Parodies continues…

Rush Limbaugh and right-wing hate radio are inciting a new wave of holiday season violence this year. Bloomberg reports that the Chief Diversity Officer of the U.S. Federal Communications Commission (the FCC) has received death threats resulting from on-air and website criticism by Limbaugh. The FCC officer is Mark Lloyd and Limbaugh has said that he is planning to bring back the “fairness doctrine” to broadcast media through a “backdoor route”. The doctrine, which required broadcasters to air opposing political views was rescinded in 1987. Lloyd said, “The right-wing smear campaign has been, in a word, incredible, generating hate mail and death threats.” Lloyd also said he didn’t have a count of the death threats, which  came by e-mail, letter and telephone calls. The threats were referred to FCC security workers.

In a telephone interview with Glenn Beck on Fox News Channel, Limbaugh said, “The things he’s talking about doing to shut down radio are simply un-American. It’s not enough to say that it’s not constitutional.” Of the death threats to Lloyd, Limbaugh sympathetically said, “I know that guy doesn’t get near the amount of death threats that I do.”

Lloyd maintains that Limbaugh and other right-wing pundits distort the facts and misinform their audience. He says that his plans for the FCC are to develop a national plan to increase use of high-speed Internet, which is due to be addressed by Congress in February. He went on to say, “I am not at the FCC to restore the fairness doctrine through the front door or the back door, or to carry out a secret plot funded by George Soros to get rid of Rush Limbaugh or Glenn Beck or any other conservative talk show host.”

If Limbaugh, Beck, Sean Hannity, Ann Coulter, Michelle Malkin, Laura Ingraham, Bill OReilly and Boston’s Jay Severin and Michael Graham do not temper their on-air hate filled rhetoric, they will all have blood on their hands when someone is maimed or killed by an impressionable member of their audience. That then might become exactly the impetus to re-institute the “fairness doctrine”. If that happens, the right-wing Bloviators in Chief will have nobody to blame but themselves.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s holiday song parody.

Hark The Herald Angels Sing song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbdvo019mgM

HARK, THE DITTO-HEADS DO SING

(sung to the Amy Grant version of “Hark The Herald Angels Sing”)

Hark, the ditto-heads do sing
“Glory to Limbaugh our King!”
On the left he is reviled
Cuz he behaves like a child
On those islands where he flies
With Viagra he does rise
His tired old act is just a game
Intended to bring him fame
Hark, the ditto-heads do sing
“Glory to Limbaugh our King!”

When Rush speaks he only lies
Unlike Beck he does not cry
Rush has an expansive girth
He is shaped like planet earth
Former wives have numbered three
He prefers his Oxy-C
Right-wing drivel he does sell
From his brainless empty shell
Hark, the ditto-heads do sing
“Glory to Limbaugh our King!”

(musical interlude)

He calls his show the E.I.B.
It’s all about me, me, me
Of his fame, he often sings
While taking credit for all things
Yet, by most he is ignored
Like a little mouse that roared
With nothing beneath his dome
He emits a rabid foam
Hark, the ditto-heads do sing
“Glory to Limbaugh our King!”