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Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 60

Just a few newsworthy events (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS: Senate Democrats are confident they have at least 60 votes for a Defense Department authorization measure that includes a repeal of the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy. Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) has threatened to filibuster the policy, which bans openly gay people from serving in the military, but his threat is toothless if more than 60 votes are in favor of the repeal. John McCain’s staunch defense of the discriminating policy has assured that he will be remembered throughout history like George Wallace when he was the final defender of racial segregation. A bigoted dinosaur.

THIS JUST IN: After meeting with President Barack Obama Thursday, Democratic leaders in Congress said they plan to hold a series of politically charged votes to extend middle-class tax cuts while letting tax cuts for the wealthy expire. The Democrats are finally showing that they do,in fact, have a backbone. Such a vote will force Republicans to vote against a middle class tax cut which will prove to the nation that they care more for the wealthy than the working class.

BREAKING NEWS: Another example of  Republican lack of concern for the working class took place Thursday when the G.O.P. blocked an effort to maintain federal unemployment insurance (UI) benefits, making a lapse in benefits all but certain when they expire at the end of the month. Consequently, on November 30th 800,000 people unable to  find work in an economy with five job hunters for every one job will lose this critical help that keeps a roof over their heads and food on the table. By the end of the year, 2 million jobless will be without help and another 1 million a month will lose their benefits beginning next year.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Republicans Telling The Truth Only When Out Of Office” features recently defeated Rep. Bob Inglis of South Carolina. Inglis is now blasting the GOP for using “racism” to whip voters into a frenzy, for “following those personalities [such as Fox News host Glenn Beck] and not leading,” and for deceiving voters with conspiracy theories about death panels and “preying on their fears.” At a House subcommittee hearing on climate change this Thursday, Inglis mocked his Republican colleagues for refusing to acknowledge the truth and danger of global warming, saying, “They slept at a Holiday Inn Express last night, and they’re experts on climate change. They substitute their judgment for people who have Ph.D.s and work tirelessly [on climate change].” Watch this:

BREAKING NEWS: We posted this clip earlier in the week, but anytime that a Fox News host describes Sarah Palin as “self defecating” is worth repeating. Please enjoy Gretchen Carlson accidentally speaking the truth.

THIS JUST IN: Speaking of Sarah Palin, the former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska is calling for the waterboarding of a blogger that leaked excerpts of her yet to be released book. Yes, “waterboarding”. Palin authored the following Twitter tweet and then quickly removed it (but not before it was captured here). Imagine how the trigger-happy Palin would overreact with that little red button if she were ever Commander in Chief!

BREAKING NEWS: As long as we are on the subject of Sarah Palin, this week’s episode of “Hypocrite Of The Week” features you know who. This week Palin criticized Republican Rep. Spencer Bachus of Alabama, saying that because Bachus supported “the Bachus bigger government agenda,” it was “no wonder he’s not thrilled with people like me.” She cited Bachus’ votes for the Wall Street bailout and the cash-for-clunkers program as proof he was no “commonsense conservative.” However, in the two years since Palin was the Republican vice presidential candidate, the former Alaska governor has pulled a 180 regarding her position on the Wall Street bailout enacted by President George W. Bush. In the midst of the 2008 financial crisis, Palin held that now infamous interview with CBS News‘ Katie Couric, and she endorsed the bailout. The exchange was odd because Palin provided a confusing reply, inexplicably tying the bank bailout to health care reform, but it was clear she favored the bailout (as did Sen. John McCain). Shall we watch it and laugh?

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Bush-Whacked” co-stars former First lady Barbara Bush and Sarah Palin. The former appeared on Larry King’s television program this week and said of the latter, “I sat next to her once. Thought she was beautiful. And she’s very happy in Alaska, and I hope she’ll stay there.”

BREAKING NEWS: Massachusetts’ women voters will be particularly interested in learning that their newly elected Republican Senator and nudist Scott Brown voted this week to block the Paycheck Fairness Act. The law would have amended the portion of the Fair Labor Standards Act of 1938 (FLSA) known as the Equal Pay Act so that women would receive equal pay for equal work. It appears that Scott Brown believes sex discrimination is good for business.

Scott Brown in his Senate office.

GO PACKERS!!!

Centerfold song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNhnThb8gEw

SCOTT BROWN IS THE CENTERFOLD

(sung to the J. Geils Band song “Centerfold”)

C’mon !
Does he walk? Does he talk?
Is he G.O.P.?
Scott Brown’s a Men’s Room angel
Larry Craig would share his seat

His buns are white like snowflakes
No underwear to stain
He poses like a sweet angel
Naked but with no brain

This sad guy loves posing in those porno magazines
He’s like a nudist angel and he’s pimping out his teens

(CHORUS)
He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

Nude behind his Senate desk
This girlie man should be in a dress
Can he see that Larry Craig
Is giving him the eye

He is naked but for shoes
Much too indecent for the news
You must wear clothes on TV
They told that Scott Brown guy

Wear diapers like Dave Vitter
They do not cover  much
Or simply wear a negligee
That would be a nice touch

(CHORUS)
He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

(na, na, na, na, na, na…..)

It’s okay we understand
Scott’s nudity should not be banned
But while prancing on the Senate lawn
We wish he would keep his clothes on

Take his truck, Yes he will
He’ll take that truck and drive it
He says the cab has lots of room
For his ass and his private

He says that his bod’s really ripped
He loves it when his clothes are stripped
Oh, no, Scott can’t deny it
Oh yeah, it’s time for him to diet!

(CHORUS)
He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

(REPEAT)

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Palin Attacks The Fed As G.O.P. Attacks Palin (Again)

The midterm elections are now history (with the exception of the Alaska Senate race and a few Congressional races) and Sarah Palin has returned to her old stomping grounds. No, not Alaska, but rather the second-rate paid speakers’ circuit. In her never-ending pursuit to squeeze every last penny out of her supporters, the former ex-quitting half-term governor has once again found business conventions to be a good forum to spread her poison.  The more prestigious gatherings have previously shunned the divisive Palin, leaving her to speak at such lowly events as the Liquor Wholesalers’ Convention, the Bowling Convention and the Battery Back-Up Sump Pump Convention. Well, here she goes again. Yesterday, Palin was the keynote speaker at the Specialty Tools & Fasteners Distributors Association Convention in Phoenix, Arizona.

The subject of her ire is now Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke and his newly released “quantitative easing” plan. In its latest move to jump start the sluggish recovery, the Federal Reserve announced last week it will pump billions into the economy by buying $600 billion in long-term U.S. Treasury bonds over the next eight months – policy known as quantitative easing.

It is obvious that the educationally challenged Palin has no understanding of the plan or its underlying economic theory, but you can count on her to be against any measure which takes place during the Obama administration regardless of its merit. Of course she leaked the subject of her speech by means of the sophomoric means of communication known as Twitter. She tweeted, “Will discuss Fed’s quantitative easing plan(print $ out of thin air)tmrrw@ tools trade assn speech” and “Today:trade speech;tmrw school event 2 start discussing QuantitativeEasing w kids around US so they prepare 4 Feds experiment w their future.”

Oh, good God, the lowly scholar from five different safety schools now wants to teach economics to school children? Will she charge the kids a fee? Let’s hope “No Child Left Behind” is fully funded so as to counter this educational disaster in the making. If there was ever a day to keep your children out of school, it is the day that Sarah Palin appears and tries to teach them.

But, while Sarah Palin was busy attacking the Fed, the Republican establishment continued its attacks against her. Numerous G.O.P. leaders have already voiced their opposition to Sarah Palin’s potential run for president by suggesting that she would be “crushed” by President Obama in a general election. Now another Republican critic has emerged. CNN reports that Rep. Spencer Bachus of Alabama told a local Chamber of Commerce group that the candidates backed by the Tea Party and Palin may be to blame for the Republican Party’s failure to take back control of the Senate in last week’s midterm elections.

“The Senate would be Republican today except for states (in which Palin endorsed candidates) like Christine O’Donnell in Delaware,” Bachus said, according to the Shelby County Reporter. “Sarah Palin cost us control of the Senate.”

Stay tuned to Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off for tomorrow’s thrilling episode of “Republicans Eating Their Own“.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Every Little Thing song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AtD13JTU5H0

EVERY LITTLE THING

(sung to the Beatles song “Every Little Thing”)

Palin’s talking provides her
A pay-day in Kentucky
Yes, you know she’s the lucky kind
She holds onto her first dime
She’s a phony sellout girl
Can’t stop blinking and winking now

Every little thing she does
Is for a fee, yeah
And there’s not one thing she does
She’ll do for free, oooh

Sarah Palin is daffy
Don’t you know that she bugs me?
Yet the Tea Party loves her now
Still there’s one thing I’m sure of
President she’ll be, never
But her cash lust will never die

Every little thing she does
Is for a fee, yeah
And there’s not one thing she does
She’ll do for free, oooh

(grifting break)

Every little thing she does
Is for a fee, yeah
And there’s not one thing she does
She’ll do for free, oooh
Every little thing
Every little thing