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Last Call For Ron Paul

How fortunate that wacky Republican Ron Paul announced his candidacy for the 2012 presidency on a Friday the 13th. He now has a ready-made excuse for why his campaign was such an abysmal failure. Despite what the pundits constantly referred to as Paul’s fervently devoted group of grassroots supporters and Tea Party nut-jobs, nobody seemed to ever actually vote for this guy. He failed to win even one single Republican primary election. Not surprisingly, Ron Paul suspended his campaign yesterday leaving Mitt Romney as the only GOP candidate left in the race.

It was obvious from the beginning that Ron Paul’s candidacy would go nowhere.  He is after all, a radical crazy person. If you need evidence of Ron Paul’s zaniness, consider these tidbits:

–  He is known as “Dr. No” because of his insistence that he will “never vote for legislation unless the proposed measure is expressly authorized by the Constitution;

– He advocates withdrawal from the United Nations, and from the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO);

– He opposes birthright citizenship;

– He advocates for the elimination of the Federal Reserve;

– He would deny women their right of freedom of choice in birth;

– He believes that the civil Rights act of 1964 is unconstitutional; and

– He would rather have sick people die from their illnesses than receive government provided health care.

Now let’s take a look at some of Ron Paul’s quotes as published in his newsletters:

– “Boy, it sure burns me to have a national holiday for that pro-communist philanderer Martin Luther King. I voted against this outrage time and time again as a Congressman. What an infamy that Ronald Reagan approved it! We can thank him for our annual Hate Whitey Day.”;

– “even in my little town of Lake Jackson, Texas, I’ve urged everyone in my family to know how to use a gun in self defense. For the animals are coming.”;

– “opinion polls consistently show only about 5% of blacks have sensible political opinions”;

– “if you have ever been robbed by a black teen-aged male, you know how unbelievably fleet-footed they can be.”; and

– “hip-hop thing to do among the urban youth who play unsuspecting whites like pianos.” (referring to the crime of carjacking).

This is scary stuff. Is it any wonder that this man is never taken very seriously by the majority of Americans?

Nevertheless, Ron Paul does have the capacity to do some good for his country. He demonstrated this last autumn when he decided not to seek re-election to his Texas House of Representatives seat. Consequently, there is certain to be one less radical insane person in the next Congress. Also, there is always the possibility that  he may decide to run as either an Independent or a third party candidate. He would still have absolutely no chance of being elected, but he would steal a certain percentage of votes form Romney thereby helping Barack Obama to win the general election.

Do the right thing Mr. Paul.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Piano Man” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=se9rfWucgeY

TEA BAGGING MEN (RON PAUL VERSION)

(sung to the Billy Joel song “Piano Man”)

It’s nine o’clock on a Saturday
Rand Paul comes marching in
A proud member of the Tea Party
Like so many white racist men

He says, “Boy you know that I’m from Kentucky
And I think that Obama blows
It was sad and back-street how he chastised BP
Just because their damn oil rigs explode”

La la la, di da da
La la, di di da da dum

Sing us a song you Tea-Bagging men
Sing us a song tonight
Give us some patriotic imagery
Tri-corn hats and a wig that’s too tight

Now Sarah Palin is no friend of mine
Thank God she’s not the VP
Yes she looked like a dope every time she misspoke
As McCain claimed she was “mavericky”

She says, “Why does the press keep on grilling me?”
As her smile runs away from her face
“Can’t they see I’m a tabloid-bred superstar,
Though I quit my job in disgrace?”

Oh, la la la, di da da
La la, di da da da dum

Ron Paul is a right-wing apologist
He is anti-gay and pro-life
Grasp of history’s hazy and he’s moon-bat crazy
Ron Paul should be confined for life

And Scott Walker’s union-busting politics
Sparked a recall to get him de-throned
While Mike Huckabee thinks his “down-hominess”
Will coax liberals to leave him alone

Sing us a song you Tea-Bagging men
Sing us a song tonight
Give us some patriotic imagery
Tri-corn hats and a wig that’s too tight

Had a pretty big crowd just last Saturday
With the Tea Baggers dressed in high style
They were at a rally with signs misspelled badly
To express ignorance all the while

And the town common, it looks like a carnival
With the Tea Baggers from far and near
They unload from their cars lots of feathers and tar
As they fan flames of hatred and fear!

Oh, la la la, di da da
La la, di da da da dum

Sing us your song you Tea Bagging men
Sing us your song tonight
Cuz we’re all in the mood for a melody
Sung by folks that are old, dumb and white

(fade into extinction)

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GOP’s “Jobs Bills” Lies Exposed

If there is one single thing the Republican Party excels at, it is telling lies. Remember Sarah Palin’s “Death Panels”? How about George W. Bush’s “Weapons of Mass Destruction”? There was Ronald Reagan’s “The U.S. does not negotiate with terrorists”. We heard Mitt Romney say “Obama has made the economy worse.” Newt Gingrich said, “The $1.6 million I was paid by Freddie Mac were for my services as, uh, a historian.” Ron Paul lied about his racist newsletters and Rick Santorum said, President Obama is “driven by a phony theology – not a theology based on the Bible.” Is it any wonder that polls have shown Republican approval ratings as low as 10%?

One of the GOP’s favorite lies which is repeated by just about all of them is that they (i.e. House Republicans) have passed 30 “jobs bills” that have just been sitting in the Senate. Speaker of the House John Boehner (pronounced bo-ner) said last Sunday on Fox news (where else?), “30 jobs bills were passed over the last year in a Republican House of Representatives that are sitting in the United States Senate — thirty. Our focus over the last 12 months has been on jobs. Our focus over the course of the next 12 months is going to be on jobs.” The Republicans even have a webpage with a list of their so-called jobs bills.

Unfortunately for Mr. Boehner and the Republicans, somebody has been keeping score. Crooksandliars.com has gone so far as to point out why each of those bills is not, in fact, a jobs bill at all. Indeed, it is humorous to note that the Republicans’ web page lists only 27 (not 30) bills. There is another lie to add to the ever-growing list. The following is a brief synopsis of each alleged “jobs bill” and why it is not a “jobs bill” at all:

HR 3630 – The Middle Class Tax Relief & Job Creation Act of 2011: It cuts the 99-week maximum down to a 59-week maximum by mid-2012, allow states to drug-test UI recipients, and allow states to reduce state unemployment benefits and substitute federal funds. It also cuts funding for key provisions of the Affordable Care Act coming online. It also repeals the new timing rules for estimated corporate tax payments for companies with assets of $1 billion or more so that they can use payments of estimated taxes as a timing tool for fourth quarter profit declarations. So, where is the job creation in this bill? None of those provisions create jobs.

HR 1633 – Farm Dust Regulation Prevention Act of 2011: This bill prevents the EPA from issuing or finalizing regulations revising air quality standards under the Clean Air Act, and excepts farm dust from all references to “particulate matter.” No jobs there.

HR 10 – Regulations from the Executive in Need of Scrutiny (REINS) Act of 2011: Guts the regulation process by mandating that every regulation promulgated be approved by Congress after an onerous submission process, while exempting any Congressional finding from judicial review. Call this one the Carte Blanche For Congress To Kill All Regulatory Authority Bill.  No jobs created by this bill.

HR 3010 – Regulatory Accountability Act of 2011: This is a modified, somewhat less onerous version of HR 10, setting guidelines for whether any regulations are warranted at all even if called for under a statute. Calling an anti-regulatory statute a jobs bill is a little like calling a half-built bridge infrastructure. So again, not a jobs bill.

HR 527 – Regulatory Flexibility Improvements Act of 2011: This bill would reduce regulatory requirements on small businesses by forcing an impact study with specific focus on small business before regulation is adopted. It would limit EPA, OSHA and CFPB regulations while presumably protecting “small” closely-held Subchapter S corporations like Koch Industries. Not a jobs bill.

HR 3012 – Fairness for High-Skilled Immigrants Act of 2011: This bill would expand job immigration beyond current limits by eliminating employment-based immigrant visa caps and raising the percentage of total visas granted to 15% from 7%. For this one, I’ll say it IS a jobs bill, but not a jobs bill for American workers. It is the “Elite Immigration Jobs Bill of 2011”.

HR 3094 – Workforce Democracy and Fairness Act: This bill redefines collective bargaining units and makes significant changes to election procedures, including one intended to intimidate employees: an employer-supplied list of eligible voters with contact information provided by the employee. Not a jobs bill. A union-buster bill.

HR 2930 – Entrepreneur Access to Capital Act:This bill exempts startups raising less than $1 million in venture capital from small investors from SEC registration and oversight. Not a jobs bill. An anti-regulatory bill.

HR 2940 – Access to Capital for Job Creators Act: This bill repeals prohibitions on solicitation or advertising of a securities offering. It’s a companion to HR 2930, and is intended to allow people with no relationship to a startup company to invest in it without any oversight by the SEC. Let’s call this and its evil twins HR 2930 and HR 1965 the “Ponzi Scheme Coverup Acts of 2011”

HR 1965 – Securities Laws Amendment: This bill changes the shareholder threshhold for SEC registration from 500 to 2000 shareholders. It’s not a jobs bill. It’s a “hide from the SEC” bill. Its companion, HR 1970, would exempt SEC registration of public offerings under $50 million rather than the current $5 million threshold.

Many More EPA Acts: So many they don’t deserve to be broken down individually. HR 2273 removes coal ash regulation from the EPA and hands it to the states. HR 2681 would put a legislative stay on cement manufacturing emission standards. HR 2250 would put a legislative stay on EPA boiler MACT rules. HR 2401 would require analysis of all EPA regulations relating to air, waste, water and climate change. HR 2018 would restrict EPA from issuing any revisions to existing water standards or issuing a new standard for a pollutant if the state has already adopted one or there is an existing standard in place. In other words, ignore any new scientific research after an initial standard has been set. HR 2021 amends the Clean Air Act to open oil and gas exploration off the Alaska coast. HR 910 strips the EPA of authority to regulate greenhouse gases under the Clean Air Act, a direct assault on efforts to limit man-made contributions to climate change. HR 872 expands the use of pesticides, fungicides and rodent without EPA approval. Not a job created in any of these bills.

Many More Oil and Gas Drilling Acts: There is HR 1231, which would require the Administration to allow offshore oil and gas drilling and exploration in order to meet set domestic production goals, effectively forcing the moratorium on offshore drilling to be lifted to meet goals. HR 1229 requires the Energy Secretary to consider any offshore drilling permits within 30 days of receiving it and provide application denials in writing within 60 days of the application. Another “forced moratorium lift” bill. HR 1230 forces sales of oil leases in the Gulf of Mexico and Outer Continental Shelf of Virginia. It also lifts requirements for environmental impact statements and grandfathers in a 2007 document as authority for environmental impact. No new jobs created here either.

Special Interest Legislation, or Pandering to Corporate Interests

  • HR 1904 proposes an exchange of land so that Resolution Copper, LLC can mine copper on what is now part of the Tonto National Forest.
  • HJ Res 37 is a resolution of disapproval on net neutrality.
  • HR 2587 prohibits the NLRB from restricting where an employer can locate. This is in response to the NLRB’s objection to the Boeing plant relocation to South Carolina, a right-to-work state.

These would fall under the anti-labor, anti-environment categories, but not particularly effective job creators. In fact, in Boeing’s case, the jobs lost would hurt the economy more than jobs created in a right-to-work state where employers are not obligated to adhere to industry standards on contracts, safety or other issues.

Republicans passing jobs bills? Nope. Just more GOP lies.

Today’s song parody takes a rapid-fire look at Republicans past, present and future. Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the parody.

We Didn’t Start The Fire song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFTLKWw542g&ob=av2e

WE DIDN’T START THE LYING

(sung to the Billy Joel song “We Didn’t Start The Fire”)

Ronald Reagan, Larry Craig, Mark Sanford, Tom Delay
Michelle Malkin, Michele Bachmann, “Goin’ with the flow”

Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Howard Baker, lack of vision
Spreading Fear, Acting queer, and ole Sixpack Joe

No icebergs, H-Bomb, “Pay for play”, “Hockey Mom”
Landrieu, Hamid Karzai, and that Michael Savage guy

Ivy tower, Van Flein, Tea-bagger party scene
Party of “No”, Tim Pawlenty, Let’s watch Glenn Beck cry

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Vitter’s fallin’, Ginny Foxx, Boehner and Inhofe
Mitch McConnell, small umbrella, Talking the talk

Spin Zone, Rent to own, Straight martini, Bank loan
Russian view and Pastor Haggard’s flock

Sex crimes, Grassley, John McCain is “Mavericky”
Lining pockets, health care plan, Giuliani, Limbaugh Land

Barrasso, Fake protest, Tom “The Hammer”, Chambliss
Senate race, Lack of grace, and Melvin Martinez

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Loaded Glock, SarahPAC, Sam Alito, Johnny Mack
Jindal, Right to die, Tripp’s father is Levi

Pentagon, Border wall, We must deport them all
Bed-wetters, genocide, No assisted suicide

Bush’s folly, Torture, Dick Cheney, Blackwater
Hate groups, Castro, John Ensign and his ‘ho

First Dude, Hannity, Mann Coulter and O’Reilly
Scooter Libby, Karl Rove, Sarah Palin’s “Sixpack Joes”

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Kay Bailey, Muslims, K Street is full of bums
Villains, Pearlman, Iraqi Invasion

Health reform hysteria, Sarah Palin mania
Shameless G-Men, War in Afghanistan

Ron Paul, Airport sex, They don’t want no litmus test
Kneel and pray, Always “nay”, Can’t get married if you’re gay

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Birth control, Lives of sin, They like folks that have white skin
Buckshot, Dow stock, Loud mouthed chicken-hawks
Takin’ Bacon, Palestine, Palin is no friend of mine
Now they have nukes in Iran, Couldn’t stop the Taliban

Makin’ fortunes, Soldiers die, Did we mention Glenn Beck cried?
Foreign debts, Homeless vets, Exposed by three jets
We voted them out the door, Now they’re just a mouse that roars
Spider holes and unjust wars, I can’t take them anymore.

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it
(repeat chorus to fade)

The Free-Fall Of Ron Paul

How fortunate that wacky Republican Ron Paul announced his candidacy for the 2012 presidency on a Friday the 13th. He now has a ready-made excuse for why his campaign was such an abysmal failure. Despite what the pundits constantly refer to as Paul’s fervently devoted group of grassroots supporters and Tea Party nut-jobs, nobody seems to ever vote for this guy. In Iowa he garnered a respectable 21% of the vote but finished only third. In the New Hampshire primary election, his percentage of the vote plateaued at 22% and in South Carolina his support dropped to 13%. It remains to be seen how low his support will drop today in the Florida primary election.

We knew that, as always, Ron Paul’s candidacy would go nowhere.  He is after all, a radical crazy person. If you need evidence of Ron Paul’s zaniness, consider these tidbits:

–  He is known as “Dr. No” because of his insistence that he will “never vote for legislation unless the proposed measure is expressly authorized by the Constitution;

– He advocates withdrawal from the United Nations, and from the North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO);

– He opposes birthright citizenship;

– He advocates for the elimination of the Federal Reserve;

– He would deny women their right of freedom of choice in birth;

– He believes that the civil Rights act of 1964 is unconstitutional; and

– He would rather have sick people die from their illnesses than receive government provided health care.

Now let’s take a look at some of Ron Paul’s quotes as published in his newsletters:

– “Boy, it sure burns me to have a national holiday for that pro-communist philanderer Martin Luther King. I voted against this outrage time and time again as a Congressman. What an infamy that Ronald Reagan approved it! We can thank him for our annual Hate Whitey Day.”;

– “even in my little town of Lake Jackson, Texas, I’ve urged everyone in my family to know how to use a gun in self defense. For the animals are coming.”;

– “opinion polls consistently show only about 5% of blacks have sensible political opinions”;

– “if you have ever been robbed by a black teen-aged male, you know how unbelievably fleet-footed they can be.”; and

– “hip-hop thing to do among the urban youth who play unsuspecting whites like pianos.” (referring to the crime of carjacking).

This is scary stuff. Is it any wonder that this man is never taken very seriously by the majority of Americans?

Nevertheless, Ron Paul does have the capacity to do some good for his country. He demonstrated that this last autumn when he decided not to seek re-election to his Texas House of Representatives seat. Consequently, there is certain to be one less radical insane person in the next Congress. Also, there is always the possibility that as soon as Paul realizes that he has no chance of capturing the Republican nomination, he may decide to run as either an Independent or a third party candidate. He would still have absolutely no chance of being elected, but he would steal a certain percentage of votes form the Republican nominee (Mitt Romney or Newt Gingrich) thereby helping Barack Obama to win the general election.

Do the right thing Mr. Paul.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Piano Man” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBC6IVP-C84

TEA BAGGING MEN (RON PAUL VERSION)

(sung to the Billy Joel song “Piano Man”)

It’s nine o’clock on a Saturday
Rand Paul comes marching in
A proud member of the Tea Party
Like so many white racist men

He says, “Boy you know that I’m from Kentucky
And I think that Obama blows
It was sad and back-street how he chastised BP
Just because their damn oil rigs explode”

La la la, di da da
La la, di di da da dum

Sing us a song you Tea-Bagging men
Sing us a song tonight
Give us some patriotic imagery
Tri-corn hats and a wig that’s too tight

Now Sarah Palin is no friend of mine
Thank God she’s not the VP
Yes she looked like a dope every time she misspoke
As McCain claimed she was “mavericky”

She says, “Why does the press keep on grilling me?”
As her smile runs away from her face
“Can’t they see I’m a tabloid-bred superstar,
Though I quit my job in disgrace?”

Oh, la la la, di da da
La la, di da da da dum

Ron Paul is a right-wing apologist
He is anti-gay and pro-life
Grasp of history’s hazy and he’s moon-bat crazy
Ron Paul should be confined for life

And Scott Walker’s union-busting politics
Sparked a recall to get him de-throned
While Mike Huckabee thinks his “down-hominess”
Will coax liberals to leave him alone

Sing us a song you Tea-Bagging men
Sing us a song tonight
Give us some patriotic imagery
Tri-corn hats and a wig that’s too tight

Had a pretty big crowd just last Saturday
With the Tea Baggers dressed in high style
They were at a rally with signs misspelled badly
To express ignorance all the while

And the town common, it looks like a carnival
With the Tea Baggers from far and near
They unload from their cars lots of feathers and tar
As they fan flames of hatred and fear!

Oh, la la la, di da da
La la, di da da da dum

Sing us your song you Tea Bagging men
Sing us your song tonight
Cuz we’re all in the mood for a melody
Sung by folks that are old, dumb and white

(fade into extinction)

Rick Perry Exits Stage Right…Very Far Right

The insane asylum that is the field of Republican Presidential candidates is losing patients at an increasing rate. By quitting the race, Tim Pawlenty, Herman Cain, Michele Bachmann and Jon Huntsman have all demonstrated vast improvement in their ability to separate reality from fantasy. Those candidates have all made substantial progress by finally realizing that it was only fantasy to consider themselves qualified contenders for the presidency. They eventually accepted the reality that they are unelectable clowns and their quitting served to release them from the confines of false illusion.

Yesterday, Rick Perry joined them on the road to recovery. He too has now quit the race.

Rick Perry in fact, may have been the most delusional of all the clowns beneath The Koch Bros. and Tea Baggers Flying Republican Circus Big Top. This Texan’s ten gallon hat was filled with ten gallons of dumb. Take for example, his bizarre stump speech antics in New Hampshire. His speech was slurred. He made crazy faces. He made odd references. Often times he made no sense at all. It appeared that he was either drunk or overly medicated. It was sad to see a potential Presidential nominee in this condition. It was even more tragic to think that a person such as this could aspire to occupy the highest office in the United States.

Things got even worse at the Republican debate which followed. Perry made a fool of himself in front of his GOP opponents, the moderators, the live audience and the television audience. The Texas Governor was asked a question about his tax and spending plan — but completely blew the answer by looking like a complete fool. Perry was listing the three Cabinet agencies he wants to abolish — and forgot the third one. Remember how it transpired?

  • Perry:  And I will tell you it is three agencies of government when i get there that are gone. Commerce, Education, and the — what’s the third one there? Let’s see…Okay. Commerce, Education, and the —”
  • Romney:  EPA?
  • Perry:  EPA, there you go.
  • Moderator:  Seriously, is EPA the one you are talking about?
  • Perry:  No sir, no, sir. We are talking about the  – agencies of government – EPA needs to be rebuilt.
  • Moderator:  You can’t – you can’t name the third one?
  • Perry:  The third agency of government I would – I would do away with education, the Commerce…Commerce and, let’s see. I can’t. The third one, I can’t. Sorry. Oops.

It is hard to believe, but things got even worse for Rick Perry after those fumbles. While speaking to a group of students in New Hampshire, Perry misinformed his young audience that the voting age is 21 (it is 18). He also told them to vote on November 12, 2012 which is not the day of the election (it is November 6th). Then, after finishing embarrassingly low in the Iowa Caucuses, he lurched very far to the right and announced that he changed his position on abortion. He was now against abortion in all cases, even in the case of rape or incest.

Another poor showing in the New Hampshire primary sealed Perry’s fate. He has now joined the quitting team of Pawlenty, Cain, Bachmann and Huntsman.

And then there were four. The remaining lunatics are Newt “Open Marriage” Gingrich, Mitt “15%” Romney, Rick “Man on Dog” Santorum and Ron “Racist” Paul. As soon as Paul quits, America can rest assured that in 2012 there will be “No New Texans”!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Come Monday song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_lL046m1Is

DUMB PERRY

 (sung to the Jimmy Buffett song “Come Monday”)

Heading out from ol’ El Paso
For campaignin’ and making dough
Rick’s got his ten-gallon on
He’s got his Colt 45, now he can lock and load

And Romney, he didn’t know
That he’d be trailing his foe
Dumb Perry, he’s not too bright
Dumb Perry, way out there on the right
He spends day after day in a tongue-twisted haze
And his “Ponzi Scheme” charge was a lie

Yes, Rick Perry is a bummer
Simple talk and lack of brains
And he wants to lead our nation
Some things are hard to explain

His state’s unemployment rolls grow
Its graduation rates are so low
Dumb Perry, he’s not too bright
Dumb Perry, way out there on the right
An academic haze back in his college days
His degree should have just been denied

Trouble raisin’ money
A hay-chewin’ dumb redneck cow
He’ll get the white vote in Montana
Cuz cowboys love him without a doubt

Rick craves Pennsylvania Ave. scenery
Those gals have nice smellin’ hair
He’ll love bowling on Tuesdays
Not to mention his gubmint health care

San Antonio has worn Rick quite thin
He’ll take care of his oil-drillin’ friends
Dumb Perry, he’s not too bright
Dumb Perry, way out there on the right
He spends day after day in a tongue-twisted haze
And his “Ponzi Scheme” charge was a lie
He spends day after day in a tongue-twisted haze
And his “Ponzi Scheme” charge was a lie

More Lies At Last Night’s GOP Debate

Last night, the Republican Presidential candidates (what’s left of them, that is) held their 22nd debate thus far. If you missed it don’t worry, they have another one scheduled in just three days and then two more the following week.

By this time, the the remaining contenders Mitt “Flip-Flop” Romney, Newt “3 Wives” Gingrich, Rick “Man on Dog” Santorum, Ron “Racist” Paul and Rick “Count to 3” Perry have essentially already said all they have to say on any issue. Consequently, every debate now is simply a mishmash of each candidate uttering the words “Obamacare”, “socialist”, “taxes”, “Ronald Reagan”, “job creators”, “regulations”, “class warfare”, “abortion”, “entitlements” and “one man and one woman” in between the same old lies and misstatements. Conspicuously missing from virtually all of these debates are the terms “working class” and “middle class”. Hmmm…wonder why?

Because of the numerous and repetitive nature of these Republican debates, fewer and fewer people are actually taking the time to tune in to watch them. To do otherwise would be like watching the same rerun episode of “The Bachelor” over and over again. Simply put, there is very little new and substantive material emerging from each subsequent debate.

Occasionally however, a few new and unique lies and misstatements do surface. But do not worry, we are not suggesting that you watch the debates to learn about all the misinformation the GOP candidates spew out as fact. We will take one for the team (that’s “toftt” in cool computer talk) and watch these charades for you and then identify all the Republican lies and confusion right here. So, here we go. This is all the garbage from last night’s debate in South Carolina.

First of all, we should mention that the audience once again behaved like a group of drunken lunatics who are incapable of controlling their outbursts or whooping and screaming. Their behavior makes the GOP debates seem more like an evangelical revival meeting than a serious political forum. This crazy crowd even took to booing in the middle of questions. One example is when moderator Juan Williams was questioning Mitt Romney about immigration and mentioned that Romney’s father was born in Mexico. Before he could finish the question, “Boos!” came raining down from the audience. What could they possibly have been displeased about at that point, the fact that Romney’s father was born in Mexico or the fact that Williams revealed this truth? At another point, Ron Paul was booed when he said the United States should use “the Golden Rule” – do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Can you believe it? This wacky audience was booing “the Golden Rule”. This was very reminiscent of past GOP debate audiences cheering about the uninsured dying from their illnesses and cheering the fact that Rick Perry has executed more people than any other governor. What is next? Will Republican audiences boo the mail-carrier’s motto of “Neither snow nor rain nor gloom of night…”?

As for the lies and misstatements in last night’s debate, The Boston Globe has provided a fine fact-check column on the subject in today’s edition. Mitt Romney, as usual, was the biggest offender. First, Mitt Romney said “This president has opened up no new markets for American goods around the world in his three years, even as European nations and China have opened up 44.” Wrong! In fact, the Globe reminds us that “Obama revived (expired) Bush-administration-era free-trade pacts with South Korea, Panama and Columbia, all passed by Congress in October, in the biggest round of trade liberalization since the North American Free Trade Agreement and other pacts of that era. In particular, the agreement with South Korea is designed to break down barriers between the United States and the world’s 15th-largest economy. The South Korea deal has the potential to create as many as 280,000 American jobs, according to a recent assessment by the staff of the U.S. International Trade Commission, and to boost exports by more than $12 billion.”

Romney also misinformed the American people about his involvement with Bain Capital and his now admittedly false claim that while heading that firm, he created hundreds of thousands of jobs. Last night Romney said, “We invested in well over 100 different businesses. And the people have looked at the places that have added jobs and lost jobs and that record is pretty much available for people to take a close look at.” Not so fast there Mitt. The Globe reports “Romney’s record as a venture capitalist at Bain Capital has been presented by his campaign highly selectively; namely, by detailing several big success stories and ignoring the job losses that resulted from Bain-owned plants and companies that closed or shrank their workforce. His overall record is not even close to being known, because it is so complex. Many of the companies are private, without the public disclosure requirements that big corporations have, and his campaign has not released details.”

A few moments later Romney said, “Three years into office, he doesn’t have a jobs plan.” Wrong yet again! The Globe reports “Obama has proposed several plans intended to spur the economy and create jobs. The most well-known was his stimulus plan, introduced in February 2009, which included about $800 billion in tax cuts and spending. At the end of 2010, Obama struck a deal with GOP congressional leaders on a package intended to stimulate hiring and growth. The deal cut the Social Security payroll tax, which provided about an extra $1,000 a year to an average family. It also extended an unemployment benefits program that provided up to 99 weeks of aid. And in September, Obama introduced his most recent jobs plan, rolling it out in a speech to the full Congress in which he urged Congress to “pass it right away.” It included $450 billion in tax cuts and new spending, including greater cuts to payroll taxes and tax breaks for companies that hire those who’ve been out of work for six months or more.”

Not to be outdone in the misinformation category, Rick Santorum lied about negative campaign ads. He said, “My ads have been positive. The only ad that I’ve ever put up has contrasted myself with the other candidates, and does so in a way talking about issues.” Wrong! The Globe points out that “Santorum is coming out with an ad this week accusing Romney of being “just like Obama” and saying Romney “once bragged he’s even more liberal than Ted Kennedy on social issues,” two negative assertions that go beyond a mere look at issues.”

Of course, when it comes to lying, few people are better than Newt Gingrich. Gingrich was using Chile’s retirement system consisting of private accounts as a model for overhauling our government guaranteed Social Security program. He said “First of all, it’s totally voluntary. If you want to stay in the current system, stay in it. If you are younger and you want to go and take a personal savings account, which would be a Social Security savings account, you can take it.” Wrong! The Globe reveals that “There is nothing voluntary about Chile’s system. It requires that all workers contribute 10 percent of their salaries to private pension plans, plus other fees for insurance, instead of a government program like Social Security.”

Poor Rick Perry just showed once again that he is not intellectually up to the challenge to debate with adults. He foolishly described Turkey — a key US ally and NATO member — as a state “ruled by what many would perceive to be Islamic terrorists.” This really does not matter however, as Perry will soon drop out of the race like so many other unqualified GOP candidates before him.

Because Rick Perry is about to disappear from the race, we dedicated today’s song parody to the dumbest Texan since George W. Bush.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Wonderful World (Don’t Know Much) song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNO72aCnVr0

RIGHT WING WORLD (DON’T KNOW MUCH)-Rick Perry Version

(sung to the Sam Cooke song “Wonderful World”)

Don’t know much about history
Don’t know much ecology
Don’t know much about that climate change
Don’t know why voters think I am strange

But I do know I have no clue
And my brain cells are so very few
What a right wing world this should be

Don’t have much of an education
I know a lot about procreation
Opposition should have no voice
Pregnant women should have no choice

But I do know one thing that is true
Pilgrims came in 1492
What a right wing world this should be

Now I don’t claim to be be an “A” student
Somethings I’ll never be
But maybe my being a “D” student, baby
Lets me revise history

Don’t know much about history
Don’t believe biology
Don’t know much about a science book
Won’t give climate change a second look

But I do know my time is due
And I’ll be there in 2-0-1-2
What a right wing world this will be

(Ponzi Scheme break)

And I do know you’ll love Rick Perry
The new brain-trust of the Tea Party
What a right wing world this will be

Mitt(wit) Romney Is The Great Pretender

Today is a big day for New Hampshire Republicans as they cast the very first votes in the nation in the Republican primary election. The heavy favorite to win is former Massachusetts Governor. But do Granite Staters enthusiastically support Romney?

The answer is “not so much” in Dixville Notch. The tiny hamlet has already closed its polls after all 7 votes were cast. The result? Mitt Romney and former Utah Gov. and former ambassador to China Jon Huntsman tied for the lead with two votes each. Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich and Rep. Ron Paul of Texas had one vote apiece. President Barack Obama received all three votes in the Democratic primary. That’s right, Barack Obama received more votes than all the Republican candidates.

The Dixville Notch tally is not likely to be indicative of the statewide vote. Most pundits agree that Romney (who owns a massive home in New Hampshire) should win the primary by a solid margin. But will such a victory coalesce nationwide support for Romney? Probably not. CNN reports that its recent New Hampshire Insiders Survey reveals that top Republican New Hampshirites believe that Romney has some very large obstacle to becoming the eventual Republican nominee for President.

The survey reveals that Romney biggest negatives are problematic perceptions:

– that he has changed views on issues for political gain (i.e. the flip-flop factor) – 52%;

– that he is not a true conservative (i.e. the secret liberal factor) – 40%;

– that his vision is not bold enough (i.e. the milquetoast factor) – 6% and

– None of the above – 2%.

CNN reports “The branding of Romney as a flip-flopper is his greatest liability nationally,” said one New Hampshire GOP Insider. “Why it didn’t hurt him here is because it was never pushed hard in this campaign by other candidates or the editorial pages [of local newspapers].” Another GOP Insider noted that the perception that Romney’s not a true conservative was “because he’s changed his views on key issues for political gain.” And a third said simply that Romney has “a trust deficit.” In short, nobody really likes the Mitt(wit).

If, as expected, Romney leaves New Hampshire as the victor, that does not necessarily bode well for him. He will have won both the Iowa Caucuses and the first primary election but history tells us that such an early sweep does not predict future success. consider the fact that the last Republican to win both of those contests was Gerald Ford in 1976. Ford of course, was the incumbent President who went on to get trounced by Democrat Jimmy Carter in the general election. It is also interesting to note that the Republican Party has not nominated a candidate from the Northeast since Thomas E. Dewey in 1948 and that did not go very well either.

Here’s hoping the same thing happens to Mitt Romney.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more singing along with today’s topical, song parody. Please enjoy!

The Great Pretender song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1oJuwkXr0E

MITT IS THE GREAT PRETENDER

(sung to The Platters song “The Great Pretender”)

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Pretending that he is so swell
His needs are such; he pretends too much
The truth he simply cannot tell

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Romney’s true beliefs are unknown
Mitt plays the game; flip-flops without shame
With no firm beliefs of his own

He was pro-choice he had us all believe
But when he faced strife, he switched up to pro-life

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
His opinion changes by town
Mitt claims to be what he’s not; you see
He wears his deceit like a crown
Romney is a flip-flopping clown

In Mass., health reform was what he achieved
He now says he feels health reform needs repeal

Yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Just switching positions around
Ol’ Mitt Romney is not what you see
He wears his deceit like a crown
Romney is a flip-flopping clown

Bachmann To Leave Presidential Race For Slot On “The Biggest Loser” (Updated)

So what did we learn from the Republican Iowa caucuses? Two things. The deeply flawed GOP Presidential field of candidates is still a mess and Michele Bachmann is unelectable.

The year of Republican indecision was made public last night for the first time when Iowa voters could not choose a candidate to support as their eventual GOP Presidential nominee. Technically, Mitt(wit) Romney was declared the winner of the first in the nation contest, but he won by only a few votes. Romney edged out Rick “Man on Dog” Santorum by only 8 votes and Ron “Racist” Paul finished a close third with 21% of the overall vote. Consequently, all three of those candidates will take seven of the 25 delegates up for grabs in Iowa. That’s right, the Iowa caucuses resulted in a three-way tie for for delegates in the race for 1,144 delegates required to capture the GOP nomination. There was no winner in Iowa and that state’s Republican voters could not manage to coalesce behind and support a single candidate to oppose Barack Obama in the general election.

The rest of the GOP field finished-up as follows. Newt “Freddie Mac” Gingrich (the most recent GOP frontrunner and “flavor of the month” finished fourth with 13% of the vote and Rick “3 Agencies” Perry captured 10%. Michele “HPV Vaccine Causes Mental Retardation” Bachmann and Jon “The Only Sane Adult in the Room” Huntsman each garnered only single digit support with 5% and 1% respectively.

Keep in mind however, that the Iowa caucuses are not a very good indicator of who will be the eventual Republican nominee. In 1980, George H.W. Bush finished ahead of Ronald Reagan. In 1988 Bob Dole beat George H. W. Bush and in 2008 Mike Huckabee bested John McCain. Hence, in the big picture, Iowa means very little when it comes to picking Presidential nominees. Consequently, the 2012 Republican game of “Presidential Musical Chairs” is likely to continue with a new frontrunner emerging in almost every primary election. The bottom line is that Republican voters do not care too much for any of their candidates. It is anybody’s guess as to which one of these unqualified clowns will eventually emerge as Obama’s opponent in the general election.

One thing is clear however. Rick Perry and Michele Bachmann are likely to drop out soon. Perry at one time was looked upon as the savior of the GOP by the evangelical conservative voting bloc who want anybody other than Mitt Romney. Upon entering the race, Perry shot to the top spot but quickly vaporized when the public realized that he was dumber than George W. Bush. Remember when he couldn’t name the three federal agencies that he wanted to disband? How about when he gave that speech in New Hampshire in which he appeared to be drunk or overly medicated? Here is a little reminder:

Michele Bachmann? It should have been apparent to everybody with a pulse that she was unqualified from the very day that she announced her candidacy. Bachmann is the moonbat-crazy Tea Party darling who claims that the legendary “Shot Heard Round The World” which started the American Revolutionary War was fired from New Hampshire. She also foolishly stated that the Founding Fathers “worked tirelessly to end slavery.” She also said that judges instruct little children “to learn that homosexuality is normal and natural and perhaps they should try it.” She claims “There are hundreds and hundreds of scientists, many of them holding Nobel Prizes, who believe in intelligent design.” She said, “But there isn’t even one study that can be produced that shows that carbon dioxide is a harmful gas.” She claimed that our new health care law would allow “that someone’s 13-year-old daughter could walk into a sex clinic, have a pregnancy test done, be taken away to the local Planned Parenthood abortion clinic, have their abortion, be back and go home on the school bus. That night, mom and dad are never the wiser.” She said, “We’re running out of rich people in this country” and that the HPV vaccine causes mental retardation! It would appear that Michele Bachmann is the one suffering from mental retardation.

The Iowa results confirm that Bachmann is not a viable candidate. As the result of her earlier Ames Straw Poll victory in the state, she went “all in” on the Iowa Caucuses. She spent countless hours and resources campaigning there and repeated ad nauseam that she was born in Iowa. Her efforts were fruitless. By receiving only 5% of the vote, she earned the title as “The Biggest Loser”. Despite the fact that evangelical conservative Republicans will vote for most anybody in an attempt to deny Mitt Romney the nomination, even they will not support Michele Bachmann (or Rick Perry).

UPDATE: Bachmann quit today. Ahhh Michele we hardly knew ye!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Bette Davis Eyes” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifDycyRNpcI

MICHELE BACHMANN EYES

 (sung to the Kim Carnes song “Bette Davis Eyes”)

Her hair is wild and bold
Her breath smells like fries
Her hands are always cold
She’s got Michele Bachmann eyes
She’s a Tea Party pawn
And she never thinks twice
She’s running out of dough
She’s got Michele Bachmann eyes

And she’ll fleece you
She’ll displease you
With no substance, she’ll just tease you
She’s atrocious
And we knows just what it
Takes to make this ‘Ho blush
She wants to embargo seven guys
She’s got Michele Bachmann eyes

She’s out there all alone
Confused and so uptight
Don’t listen to her drone
She’s got Michele Bachmann eyes
She’s made a fumble or two
Misspoken more than twice
Staffers quit on her too
She’s got Michele Bachmann eyes

And she’ll fleece you
She’ll displease you
With no substance, she’ll just tease you
She’s atrocious
And we knows just what it
Takes to make this ‘Ho blush
She wants to embargo seven guys
She’s got Bette Davis eyes

She’ll tease you
She’ll unease you
Just to squeeze you
She’s got Michele Bachmann eyes

She’ll confuse you
And she’ll lose you
(fade to end)

GOP Candidates Lie During Debate

When will the clowns seeking the Republican presidential nomination ever realize that their lies will be exposed? In this day of the internet and audio and video tape, a person’s veracity can be ascertained almost immediately. Why is it then, that the GOP candidates continue to make blatantly false statements?

The answer is simple. They know that their audience of Fox News addicts will never be correctly informed about their lies. Fox News is simply the propaganda arm of the Republican Party and consequently that station not only enables, but joins in on the spreading of GOP talking-point misinformation. Case in point is this wonderful Fox News graph regarding the unemployment rate since President Obama has been elected. Notice how the November 2011 rate of 8.6% is shown graphically as being higher than the February 2011 rate of 8.9% and the March 2011 rate of 8.8%. Indeed, the Fox News graph shows Novembers 8.6% rate as being even with October’s 9.0% rate. Quite deceiving, yet it furthers the Fox News goal of making Obama look bad despite facts to the contrary.

Last night’s Republican primary debate was broadcasted and moderated by Fox News. Therefore, please do not expect any fact checking by Fox News in the next few days. Not to worry however, CNN has done the fact checking for us. That media outlet is actually unbiased, so it exposed the lies of both Newt Gingrich and Michele Bachmann.

First, Newt Gingrich said, “I balanced the budget for four straight years, paid off $405 billion in debt, pretty conservative.” He was lying of course. CNN revealed that According to the non-partisan Congressional Budget Office, the nation ran a deficit in 1995 (-$164 billion), 1996 (-$107.4 billion) and 1997 (-$21.9 billion). It ran a surplus in 1998 ($69.3 billion) and 1999 ($125.6 billion) all while Gingrich served as Speaker of the House. To make matters even worse, the national debt on the day Gingrich was sworn in as speaker was $4.8 trillion. Four years later, it was $5.6 trillion, an increased debt of $800 billion, according to the U.S. Treasury website. So, “No Newt, you did not balance the budget for four straight years or come close to paying off $405 billion in debt.”

Michele Bachmann did not fare much better. She said “We have an IAEA report that just recently came out that said, literally, Iran is within just months of being able to obtain that (nuclear) weapon.” Ron Paul responded immediately that her assertion was false, but she stuck with it. The fact is that the IAEA report does not say that Iran is within months of being able to obtain a nuclear weapon. Bachmann too is spreading false information.

There is not much to say about the performance of the other candidates in terms of “truthiness”. Romney was civil. Huntsman and Santorum were as invisible as ever. Ron Paul was noticeable only because he demonstratively opposed the mainstream Republican desire for more wars. Rick Perry however, provided some levity to the event when he described himself as the “Tim Tebow of the Iowa caucuses.” Perry of course was comparing his ineptitude in debates to Tebow’s perceived poor mechanics as a football quarterback who manages to win games despite his style. Unfortunately for Perry, his failings are irreparable.

Please remember to click on the song link below before reading the lyrics because it is so much more fun to sing along while the actual song is playing.

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpPdl0StUVs

HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY PERRY WISHLIST

 (sung to the Frank Sinatra song “Have Yourself A Very Merry Christmas”)

Have yourself a merry Perry wish-list
Rick loves the far right
He loves you, if you are Christian, rich and white

Have yourself a merry Perry wish-list (merry Perry wish-list)
That’s if you’re not gay (that’s if you’re not gay)
If you are, then simply pray that gay away

Rick Perry loves those olden days
Church-beholden days of yore
All those blacks that were near to us
In the rear of bus for sure

Tea-Baggers will vote for Rick together
Jews are not allowed
Muslims too are barred and for that Rick is proud
So have yourself a merry Perry wish-list now

(Rick Perry loves those olden days
Church-beholden days of yore
All those blacks that were near to us
In the rear of bus for sure)

Souvenirs of us and Rick together
He’s our sacred cow
Rick is our God on earth in the here and now
So have yourself a merry Perry wish-list now

Perry wish-list
Perry wish-list

GOP Flavor Of The Month Gingrich Leaves Bitter Aftertaste

The Republican Presidential candidate flavor of the week has just taken on a decidedly bitter aftertaste. First it was Sarah Palin that conservatives wanted as their Presidential nominee, then it was Michele Bachmann who titillated the Tea Party. When Palin elected not to run and it became evident that Bachmann was unelectable because she is moonbat-crazy, the Republican base turned to Chris Christie and Rick Perry as their taste du-jour. Like Palin however, Christie decided not to run and Perry lost favor the moment he opened his mouth at debates. Next up was Herman Cain. Unfortunately, he also left a bad taste in the mouths of conservatives when his series of unfortunate events (raising taxes on the working class, multiple sexual harassment claim and ignorance of foreign policy) unfolded. Consequently, Republicans have now turned their lonely eyes to Newt Gingrich. Unfortunately (for the GOP and Gingrich), he too is now quickly souring.

It is now more than obvious that Republicans are turning over every stone in an attempt to unearth a nominee other than the despised Mitt Romney. Nonetheless, it does not look like Newt Gingrich is “The One”. He jumped to the top of the GOP list only after the five aforementioned saviors imploded. It is understandable why he was their sixth choice. After all, Newt Gingrich was the only Speaker of the House in history to be sanctioned while in office for an ethics violation. It is also remarkable that he was driven from the speakership position and also his seat in the House of Representatives by his own Republican Party. Additionally, It was recently discovered that the self-described fiscal conservative ran up a nearly $1 million credit bill at toney Tiffany & Co. jewelers while simultaneously his campaign is nearly $1 million in debt. Shortly thereafter, his entire senior campaign staff abruptly quit on him.

This week, things got even worse for Newt Gingrich. Gingrich has long been running along the campaign trail blaming (unjustifiably) pseudo-governmental Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac for the mortgage meltdown which collapsed our economy in 2007. Indeed, on October 11, 2011 he went so far as to say,

“If you want to put people in jail… You ought to start with Barney Frank and Chris Dodd. And let’s look at the politicians who created the environment, the politicians who profited from the environment, and the politicians who put this country in trouble. In Barney Frank’s case, go back and look at the lobbyists he was close to at Freddie Mac.”

By the way, here is Barney Frank’s response to Gingrich’s statement:

Damming words. Unfortunately for Newt Gingrich, it was just discovered that he was one of those Freddie Mac lobbyists or consultants. Bloomberg reported on Tuesday that Gingrich was hired to gain GOP support on Capitol Hill as the government-backed mortgage company came under fire during the subprime mortgage meltdown. CNN also confirmed that “Gingrich Group was paid between $1.6 million and $1.8 million to lobby Republicans in Congress on behalf of the government-backed mortgage lender.” The payments to Gingrich were made during two periods – from 1999 to 2002 and 2006 to 2008. CNN reports that a former official who worked for Freddie Mac during both of Gingrich’s stints, claims that Gingrich was consulted about Freddie’s efforts to become more transparent about “risk and capital management” procedures, risk information disclosure, and how those efforts would be received in Congress, specifically by Republicans. The official went on to say that during his first stint, Freddie Mac wanted to “bond” with Bush administration officials on the idea of creating a “home ownership society” – getting more Latinos and other minorities into home ownership – and worked with Gingrich on that.

It sure looks like Newt Gingrich has some ‘splainin’ to do!

Stay tuned for the upcoming announcement of the newest Republican Presidential flavor of the week. Who will it be? Ron Paul? Rick Santorum? Jon Huntsman? One thing is certain however, it will not be the all but certain eventual nominee, Mitt Romney.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

I Am Woman song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MGMESM8JKOg

I AM GINGRICH

(sung to the Helen Reddy song “I Am Woman”)

I am Gingrich, hear me snore
The G.O.P. showed me the door
In ’98, I was thrown out on my rear end
‘cause I called for a class war
When Clinton dallied with that whore
So what if I also had a lady friend

Oh yes I’m despised
And I caused a lot of pain
I’ve been married thrice
And I will wed again
Remember, “Contract With America”
I was wrong (wrong)
Now I’m invisible (invisible)
I am Gingrich

Now I’ve shown you that I’m tasteless
By calling Sonia a racist
When I’m the guy that bloviates on ghettos
My lies will grow much stronger
And my nose will grow much longer
When I start to call Sotomayor a “Hoe”

Oh yes I’m despised
And I caused a lot of pain
I’ve been married thrice
And I will wed again
Remember, “Contract With America”
I was wrong (wrong)
Now I’m invisible (invisible)
I am Gingrich

I am Gingrich don’t you know
Democrats know that I blow
Fox News spreads my fat visage across the land
And I’ll use those embryos
And those nameless “baby does”
If it helps me to advance my final stand

Oh yes I’m despised
And I caused a lot of pain
I’ve been married thrice
And I will wed again
Remember, “Contract With America”
I am wrong (wrong)
And I’m invisible (invisible)
I am Gingrich
Oh, I am Gingrich
I am invisible
I am wrong

(Fading)
I am Gingrich
I am invisible
I am wrong
I am Gingrich

Simply Stated, Rick Perry Is Too Stupid To Be President

The Republican Presidential field of candidates is fast becoming the most unqualified and ridiculous bunch of coconuts to ever fall out of the tree. Here is what some pundits are saying. “As a Republican, I am panicking”, said Debra Saunders of the San Francisco Chronicle. Philip Klein of the WashingtonExaminer.com says the field is “incredibly weak” and the candidates are variously “uninspiring, unserious, unprepared, dishonest, unreliable, inexperienced, inconsistent or ideologically malleable,” and not one of them “seems up to the task at hand.” George Will of The Washington Post adds, “has conservatism really come so far, surmounting so many obstacles, to settle, at a moment of economic crisis, for this?”

Consider what we have witnessed even before a single primary vote has been cast. The self-described fiscal conservative Newt Gingrich was discovered to have approximately $1 million in credit charges at upscale jeweler Tiffany & Co. while his campaign is simultaneously approximately $1 million in debt. Ron Paul has advocated that people without health insurance should either rely on the charity of friends or die from lack of medical treatment. Mitt Romney continues to flip-flop by changing his positions on issues on a near daily basis and he believes that “corporations are people.” Rick Santorum believes that the certain result of same sex marriages is sex with dogs. Michele Bachmann believes that the HPV vaccination causes mental retardation and she also believes that her crop of uber-conservative GOP rivals are “frugal socialists.” Herman Cain has more sexual harassment charges levied against him than Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson combined and nobody knows who Jon Huntsman is.

The biggest joke of all however, is Rick Perry. This guy’s ten gallon hat is simply filled with ten gallons of dumb. Take for example, his bizarre stump speech antics last Friday in New Hampshire. His speech was slurred. He made crazy faces. He made odd references. Often times he made no sense at all. It appeared that he was either drunk or overly medicated. It was sad to see a potential Presidential nominee in this condition. It was even more tragic to think that a person such as this could aspire to occupy the highest office in the United States.

Things got even worse at the Republican debate which followed. Perry simply made a fool of himself in front of his GOP opponents, the moderators, the live audience and the television audience. The Texas Governor was asked a question about his tax and spending plan — but completely blew the answer by looking like a complete fool. Perry was listing the three Cabinet agencies he wants to abolish — and forgot the third one. Here is how it transpired:

  • Perry:  And I will tell you it is three agencies of government when i get there that are gone. Commerce, Education, and the — what’s the third one there? Let’s see…Okay. Commerce, Education, and the —”
  • Romney:  EPA?
  • Perry:  EPA, there you go.
  • Moderator:  Seriously, is EPA the one you are talking about?
  • Perry:  No sir, no, sir. We are talking about the  – agencies of government – EPA needs to be rebuilt.
  • Moderator:  You can’t – you can’t name the third one?
  • Perry:  The third agency of government I would – I would do away with education, the Commerce…Commerce and, let’s see. I can’t. The third one, I can’t. Sorry. Oops.

Stick a fork in Rick Perry because, like Herman Cain, he is done!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Wonderful World (Don’t Know Much) song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNO72aCnVr0

RIGHT WING WORLD (DON’T KNOW MUCH)-Rick Perry Version

(sung to the Sam Cooke song “Wonderful World”)

Don’t know much about history
Don’t know much ecology
Don’t know much about that climate change
Don’t know why voters think I am strange

But I do know I have no clue
And my brain cells are so very few
What a right wing world this should be

Don’t have much of an education
I know a lot about procreation
Opposition should have no voice
Pregnant women should have no choice

But i do know one thing that is true
Pilgrims came in 1492
What a right wing world this should be

Now I don’t claim to be be an “A” student
Somethings I’ll never be
But maybe my being a “D” student, baby
Lets me revise history

Don’t know much about history
Don’t believe biology
Don’t know much about a science book
Won’t give climate change a second look

But I do know my time is due
And I’ll be there in 2-0-1-2
What a right wing world this will be

(Ponzi Scheme break)

And I do know you’ll love Rick Perry
The new brain-trust of the Tea Party
What a right wing world this will be