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Great Scott, Elizabeth Warren Is Crushing Brown!

The Elizabeth Warren campaign received a belated Christmas present this week when her Federal Elections Committee filing revealed that she raised $5.7 million in the last quarter of 2011. Warren, the Massachusetts Democratic Party’s opponent to incumbent Republican Senator Scott Brown, is proving to be a more than formidable candidate. The support for Warren also appears to be substantially fueled by Massachusetts voters (predominantly Democrats) who are anxious to recapture Ted Kennedy’s Senate seat. Those voters consider it to have been an embarrassment when,  in 2010 Republican Scott Brown surprisingly won the special election for that seat with the help of gads of out of state Tea Party and Wall Street money.

Warren’s fourth quarter 2011 haul consisted of true grassroots support. She had 23,000 Massachusetts donors giving an average of $64.00 per person. Warren is also attracting a surprising amount of out of state money from Democrats who are aware that Brown’s (and the Republicans’) grasp on this Senate seat is quite tenuous. The $5.7 million raised by Warren easily outpaced the Brown campaign which raised $3.2 million during the same period. Warren’s campaign also walloped Brown’s in the third quarter of 2011 when she raised twice as much money as Brown. In fact, in the five months since Elizabeth Warren announced her candidacy last August, she has raised $8.8 million. In contrast, Brown has only raised $8.5 million during the entire twelve months of 2011.

Warren’s wide appeal stems from the national perception that she is a champion of the working/middle class and an opponent of the Wall Street system that caused our economy’s collapse. She was, of course, the architect of the new federal Consumer Financial Protection Bureau. The goal of that agency is to protect consumers from unscrupulous lenders, to insure that lending documents are written in plain English and not complicated legalese and to prevent another future taxpayer-funded bank bailout by means of subjecting the nation’s largest banks to periodic stress tests. Warren recently explained the mutual commitment between her and the working/middle class when she said, “From all across our Commonwealth, people are supporting our campaign and the fight to level the playing field for middle-class families.”

In stark contrast to the consumer-friendly appeal of Elizabeth Warren, Scott Brown was named by Forbes magazine as one of “Wall Street’s Favorite Congressmen.” Brown’s appeal to the Tea Party and conservative Republicans has also been on the wane as the result of his voting alongside Democrats and against the majority of Republicans on several hotly contested bills. Scott Brown is no longer the rising star of the Republican Party which he was projected to be when he took office in 2010. This became visibly apparent when Mitt Romney declined to have Brown speak on his behalf during the New Hampshire primary campaign despite the fact that Brown was one of his earliest endorsers. Consequently, it does appear as if Brown will be capable of raising nearly as much national money as he did in 2010.

Brown has other problems also. He injected himself into the spotlight last February when he issued a press release for his yet unreleased autobiography titled “Against All Odds: My Life of Hardship, Fast Breaks, and Second Chances”. That press release revealed for the first time that Brown had been a victim of childhood sexual abuse on at least three occasions and by two different deviants. Two of those molestations occurred at a Massachusetts summer camp and the other happened at an unidentified location. By including that bit of personal red meat in the pre-publication release, there is no denying that the revelation was intended to launch sales of his book. Brown however, has steadfastly refused to identify his molester and has also refused to assist law enforcement agencies in investigating the matter. When asked by local television station WBZ, at the time of the book’s release, if he would pursue his alleged sexual abuser, Brown said, “I have more important things to do… he’s probably in his 70s today.” Massachusetts Cape and Islands District Attorney, Michael O’Keefe reports that Scott Brown told him he didn’t want to pursue the case.

By means of his investigation obstruction, Scott Brown has painted himself into a corner from which he may not be able to escape without a permanent unsightly stain on his moral character. He had every right to keep his sexual abuse a private matter but as soon as he publicized and profited from the revelation the rules changed. Brown’s criminal allegations have been made public by the release of his book and Scott Brown now has a moral obligation to reveal the identity of his abuser if, for no other reason, than to prevent this sexual predator from hurting more children. It makes no difference that the criminal is “probably in his 70s” because there are numerous examples of convicted sexual predators in that age range and sexual predators tend to repeat their crimes. Scott Brown will need more than the Tea Party to win re-election in 2012. Massachusetts Republicans and Democrats may disagree on many issues, but protecting sexual offenders is not one of them.

The most recent poll conducted in December 2011 reveals waning support which spells trouble for the Scott Brown campaign. The UMass/Boston Herald poll reveals that Brown, who is routinely referred to as “Massachusetts’ Favorite Politician” is presently trailing Elizabeth Warren by 7 percentage points. If Brown wants to win this race, he might be forced to pull out all the stops and once again pose nude as he once did in Cosmopolitan Magazine.

Remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Downtown song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sku-1hqA5xw

SCOTT BROWN

(sung to the Petula Clark song “Downtown”)

If Mass. is your home
And you are full of baloney,
You must surely be – Scott Brown
You have your worries,
With no clothes in snow flurries
You’re a nudist boy – Scott Brown

You’re popular in the woods but were voteless in the city
Your term is only two years Scott, and isn’t that a pity?
You’re sure to lose

You’ve got some Mitt Romney hair
But it grows down on your buttocks, we’ve seen when you’re bare, and so
Scott Brown – politics of hate when you’re
Scott Brown – voted right out the door
Scott Brown – private life’s waiting for you
(Scott Brown, Scott Brown)

Don’t wear a frown
As the Tea-Baggers surround you
They are friends not foes – Scott Brown
The “Party of No”
Is just the place that they go to
Where their hatred grows – Scott Brown

Just charm them with the rhythm of your naked bossanova
They’ll be bare-assed with you too before the night is over
Happy again

They’ll take off their underwear
Then they’ll forget all their troubles, forget all their cares like you,
Scott Brown – not erudite or bright
Scott Brown – every nudist’s delight
Scott Brown – you’re gonna be alright now
(Scott Brown, Scott Brown, Scott brown)

(Scott Brown, Scott Brown)

And you might find that your behind will help ingratiate you
With Larry Craig who loves the view and has a gentle hand to
Guide you along

And maybe you’ll see him bare
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares dear bro
Scott Brown – get right down on all fours
Scott Brown – don’t wait a minute more
Scott Brown – Larry Craig’s waiting for you

Scott Brown (Scott Brown) Scott Brown (Scott Brown)
Scott Brown (Scott Brown) Scott Brown (Scott Brown)
(repeat and fade out)

Elizabeth Warren Gets Under Scott Brown’s Exposed Skin

This is what Elizabeth Warren thinks of Scott Brown's centerfold.

The race for Ted Kennedy’s Massachusetts Senate seat is heating up. You might recall that after Kennedy passed away in 2009, a special election to fill his seat was held in January 2010. As the result of out of state Tea Party money and some local Democratic Party apathy, Republican Scott Brown won that election. The very next day, Massachusetts Democrats vowed to re-energize themselves so as not only to recapture Kennedy’s Senate seat in 2012 but to ensure that Democrats hold on to every elected position which they control in the bluest of blue states.

As the month’s passed, Scott Brown’s popularity began to wain both nationally and in Massachusetts. The radically conservative Tea Baggers were angered at Brown as the result of his siding with Democrats on some crucial Senate votes such as on an expensive jobs bill and he has repeatedly sided with Democrats on cloture votes which served to defeat Republican filibusters of Democratic bills. He has also lost luster amongst Bay Staters because he has been legislatively insignificant (as compared to Kennedy) and because he has been seen by many as a person who is willing to enable a child molester to continue offending. In his recently released memoir, Brown admitted that he was sexually molested as child at a local summer camp, but he has refused every request from law enforcement officials to identify the criminal so that he may be apprehended.

The strengthening wave of Democratic momentum and the ebbing tide of enthusiasm for Scott Brown became most evident last November during the national midterm elections. Brown’s seat was not up for election, but most every other statewide seat was in contest. The startling result was that in an election where Republican candidates won in a landslide of national elections and captured control of the US House of Representatives, the Brown-endorsed GOP candidates lost every single statewide race in Massachusetts. This made the Democratic party even stronger in that state than it was prior to Brown’s election. Suddenly Scott Brown’s formerly iron-clad grasp on the Senate seat was showing signs of weakness. What the Democrats needed however, was a strong challenger.

Enter Elizabeth Warren. The Harvard Law School professor and architect of the newly formed Consumer Financial Protection Bureau recently declared her candidacy. She brought instant momentum in the form of national support (and the out of state money which comes with that) and her high profile energized Massachusetts Democrats. In less than a month after announcing her candidacy, Warren vaulted ahead of Brown in the polls. Next, she gave an impromptu speech at the home of a local supporter which was captured by an attendee’s video camera.  Her impassioned delivery of the progressive message that government helps not only the needy but also the well to do became an instant viral YouTube hit.

Seizing upon her gaining momentum, Warren then had a little fun at last week’s Massachusetts Democratic Senate debate. She chided Scott Brown on at least two occasions. First she declared that unlike Brown, she would would not be named “Wall Street’s Favorite Senator”.

Next, when asked how she paid for her college education, Warren jokingly answered, “I didn’t take my clothes off.” This was a lighthearted jab at Scott Brown for his decision to pose nude in Cosmopolitan magazine to finance his law school tuition. Brown however, took offense. He appeared on a Boston radio station a few days later and when asked by the host what his response to Warren’s comment would be, he answered, “Thank God.” Brown then gaffed however, by saying that unlike Warren, “I didn’t go to Harvard, I went to the school of hard knocks and I did whatever I had to do to pay for school.” Problem is, Elizabeth Warren did not go to Harvard either. In fact, the schools attended by Brown (Tufts University and Boston College Law School) are both “expensive, private, liberal elitist East Coast schools” as compared to the schools (University of Houston and Rutgers School of Law) which Warren attended.

There is no question that Elizabeth Warren has gotten under the very exposed skin of Scott Brown.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody. Please enjoy!

I’M DOWN (ON SCOTT BROWN)

(sung to the Beatles song “I’m Down”)

Scott’s tellin’ lies thinking I can’t see
That nude guy is so blind he can’t see
I’m down (I’m really down)
I’m down (Down on Scott Brown)
I’m down (I’m really down)
Watch as I laugh at that nude Scott Brown
(Watch as I laugh) When we vote him down

We’ll all sing when he’s voted away
Brown’s short fling will be over in days
I’m down (I’m really down)
I’m down (Down on Scott Brown)
I’m down (I’m really down)
Watch as I laugh at that nude Scott Brown
(Watch as I laugh) When we vote him down

Once he’s dethroned, he’ll be all by himself
Scott will moan: “They wanted somebody else!”
I’m down (I’m really down)
Let’s vote him down (Vote down Scott Brown)
Scott Brown (He’s goin’ down)
Watch as I laugh at that nude Scott Brown
(Watch as I laugh) When we vote him down

(Wow! Scott’s goin’ down!)

Whoo, baaby!

Oh Scott, you’re soon going down (He’s goin’ down)
I guess your down (He’s really down)
We’re down on Scott Brown (He’s goin’ down)
Scott! Brown! (He’s goin’ down)
Let’s hang him upside down
Oh yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh, yeh, he’s down (He’s really down)
Scott baby you’re down (He’s really down)
Let’s hang him upside down (Let’s watch him frown)
Ooh, that Brown (He’s such a clown)
Scott baby you’re down, yeh
Scott baby you’re down, yeh
Scottie, you’re down (You’re really down)
Scott baby you’re down (You’re goin’ down)
Oh, Scottie, Scottie, Scottie! (You’re goin’ down)
Oh, Scottie you’re down (You’re goin’ down)
You’re down, down, down, down, down, down, down, down,  yeh, whoa!!!

Lynnrockets’ Columbus Day Off

Today is a day when we conduct one of our family traditions. The autumn in New England is a magical time when the air is crisp and clean, the foliage is bold and bright and the smell of burning leaves and baking apples pies is everywhere. It is the season which defines New England best and endears it most to me.

Early in the morning each Columbus Day we assemble the family and head out to the Topsfield Fair in Topsfield, Massachusetts some 30 or so miles north of Boston. The Topsfield Fair is the nation’s oldest continuously run agricultural fair. It began back in 1818 as a vehicle to “to promote and improve the agricultural interests of farmers and others in Essex County.” By government decree it was suspended for three years during the Civil War and for three years, 1943, 1944 and 1945 during World War II. It has since developed the trappings and attractions of so many state fairs such as a midway with thrill rides and the usual assortment of exotic junk foods such as this year’s specialty, Fried Kool Aid (BTW, I am told that Tea Partiers are particularly fond of that treat).

Yet, despite the modern carnival atmosphere, the Topsfield Fair has somehow maintained the feeling of its agricultural history. There are assorted barn-like structures which display all the award-winning rabbits and chickens and turkeys, and pigeons, and vegetables, and flowers. There are also structures in which vendors hawk farm equipment and tractors and plows. There are dog shows and horse shows and pig chases and live entertainment. Nobody would miss viewing the giant pumpkin contest winner which is always prominently displayed in the very same spot of honor.

Nothing ever changes much at the Topsfield Fair, including the members of our touring party of about 10 or 12. Our ages change and members retire due to age and are replaced by fresh young toddlers, but the bloodline remains intact and the tradition persists. That is a nice feeling in these days of constant change and instant communication with strangers. Some quaint family traditions have that magical aura that reminds you how simple, loving and fun life can be. That might be the most rewarding and heart-warming feeling of them all.

Well, we are off to the fair!

Mitt(wit) Romney Makes It Official: The Flip-Flop Campaign Begins!

Mitt Romney, the former Governor of Massachusetts and the failed 2008 Republican Presidential candidate will announce that he is seeking the Presidency once again today. His announcement will be made in New Hampshire, which holds the nation’s first primary election.

Romney however, will face a lot of obstacles in attempting to win-over Republican support. The reason? Absolutely nobody understands what he stands for. He is, without doubt, the single biggest flip-flopper that we have ever scene. While Governor of Massachusetts he was in support of safe and legal abortions. He now claims to be staunchly pro-life. While campaigning in Massachusetts, he was a steadfast supporter of gun control regulations. Since then, he has joined the NRA and now claims to support essentially no firearm regulation. While in Massachusetts he favored carbon emission regulations. He now opposes them in any form.

Want more examples? In a 1994 letter to the Log Cabin Republicans, who advocate gay rights, Romney said he was in favor of “gays and lesbians being able to serve openly and honestly” in the military. He now says it would be a mistake to interfere with the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. In 1994, he advocated a spending limit on congressional elections and the abolition of political action committees. In 2002, he supported public financing of campaigns from a 10 percent tax on private fundraising. Later, Romney said the McCain-Feingold law limiting campaign contributions is an attack on free speech. In a November 2005 interview with the Boston Globe, he described an immigration overhaul advanced by John McCain as “reasonable.” He has since denounced it as an “amnesty plan.”

Of course, the most damaging of all the Mitt Romney flip-flops is his 360 degree reversal on health care reform policy. It is now common knowledge that although Romney is bending over backwards to join in on the Republican mantra of opposing everything about the Democrats’ 2010 health care reform law, he actually enacted a virtually identical plan in Massachusetts when he was governor… and supported or voted for similar federal plans in 1994, 2006, 2008 and 2009. In fact, Mitt Romney was the pioneer of the dreaded “personal mandate” which compels individuals to purchase health insurance and which is so universally hated by conservatives. In support of his personal mandate, Romney once said,

I think there are a number of features in the Massachusetts plan that could inform Washington on ways to improve health care for all Americans. The fact that we were able to get people insured without a government option is a model I think they can learn from.”

Ouch! That is surely going to leave a mark!

Even if Republican voters decide not to hold Mitt Romney accountable for his multiple policy flip-flops because they believe that he has the business acumen to help the economy create jobs, he still has a problem. You might recall that while running for Governor of Massachusetts, Romney promised Bay State voters that he would use his business savvy to create many new jobs. Did he fulfill his promise? Not exactly. During his full term in office, Massachusetts ranked 47th in the nation in terms of job creation according to the U.S. Labor Department. The only states that created fewer jobs were Ohio, Michigan and Louisiana. Also, when you examine Romney’s job creation ranking during the first two years of his administration (the period that Obama has now been in office), you will discover that Massachusetts ranked 50th. What makes those figures even worse is the fact that Romney governed during a time of national economic prosperity.

As Ricky Ricardo once said, “Mitt(wit), you got some splainin’ to do!”

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZk_HnE-cdU

IS IT “YES” OR IS IT ”NO”?

 (sung to The Clash song “Should I Stay Or Should I Go”)

Romney you’ve got to let us know
Is it “yes” or is it “no”?
Change positions all the time
You know we think you’ve lost your mind
Please Mitt Romney let us know
Is it “yes” or is it “no”?

It’s always tease, tease, tease
Just make your mind-up would you please
You were pro-choice but you went back
And your health plan you now attack
So come on Mitt let us know
Is it “yes” or is it “no”?

Is it “yes” or is it “no” now?
Is it “yes” or is it “no” now?
Mitt you know that you’re in trouble
Cuz your positions more than double
So come on Mitt let us know!

Your indecision’s bugging me
(weird double-talk)
What is  your gun right policy?
(more weird double-talk)
What do you think of amnesty?
(even more weird double-talk)
We just know that you’re really shifty
(yes, even more weird double-talk)
So Mitt Romney you know
(can you believe it, even more weird double-talk)
You should cool it or you should blow!
(here we go again)

Split!

Is it “yes” or is it “no” now?
Is it “yes” or is it “no” now?
Mitt you know that you’re in trouble
Cuz your positions more than double
So come on Mitt let us know
Is it “yes” or is it “no”?

Is it “yes” or is it “no” now?
Mitt you know that you’re in trouble
Cuz your positions more than double
So come on Mitt let us know
Is it “yes” or is it “no”?

Obama Praises Romney For Pioneering Obamacare

President Barack Obama visited Boston, Massachusetts last week on a fundraising mission. While there, he not only raised a boat-load of cash for his re-election campaign, but he also heaped words of praise upon one of his likely GOP opponents. Obama gave former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney a back-handed complement when he said,

“Yes, we passed health care with an assist from a former Massachusetts governor. Great idea!”

Obama’s remark was greeted with applause and laughter from the throng of supporters at the Boston Center of the Arts.

CNN reports, “Obama was of course referring to his health care reform law, passed and signed last year, that he has repeatedly – and probably at time facetiously – said was modeled on the landmark 2006 health care reform law signed into law in Massachusetts by then-Governor Mitch Romney.

The similarities between the Massachusetts law and the federal law have become a major sticking point for the probable 2012 contender. As he tests the waters for a presidential run, Romney continues to face questions from conservatives who deride a provision in the both the Massachusetts and federal health care laws that requires people to buy medical insurance or pay a tax penalty.”

In essence, Obama’s Boston visit accomplished at least two goals. He raised over two million dollars and he undermined one of his likely opponents in his very own backyard.

Well played, Mr. President.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more singing along with today’s topical, song parody. Please enjoy!

The Great Pretender song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1oJuwkXr0E

MITT IS THE GREAT PRETENDER

(sung to The Platters song “The Great Pretender”)

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Pretending that he is so swell
His needs are such; he pretends too much
The truth he simply cannot tell

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Romney’s true beliefs are unknown
Mitt plays the game; flip-flops without shame
With no firm beliefs of his own

He was pro-choice he had us all believe
But when he faced strife, he switched up to pro-life

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
His opinion changes by town
Mitt claims to be what he’s not; you see
He wears his deceit like a crown
Romney is a flip-flopping clown

In Mass., health reform was what he achieved
He now says he feels health reform needs repeal

Yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Just switching positions around
Ol’ Mitt Romney is not what you see
He wears his deceit like a crown
Romney is a flip-flopping clown

Mitt Romney Pontificates Prematurely

I know this much about job creation.

Former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney wrote an op-ed column in yesterday’s USA Today in which he criticized President Barack Obama over job creation. He went so far as to say that the president has made the recession worse and that high unempoyment will persist for years to come. He wrote,

“President Obama didn’t cause the recession, but he made it worse and caused it to last longer. From the outset, he inaugurated the most anti-investment, anti-business, anti-jobs policies we have seen since Jimmy Carter.”

Unfortunately for the Mitt(wit), he spoke a day too soon. Today the Labor Department released its jobs report for March 2011. It revealed that the job market improved once again last month as the result of strong business hiring which dropped the unemployment rate to its lowest level in two years. More specifically the report showed that the economy gained 216,000 jobs last month which was more than the 180,000 that was predicted and was also more than the 194,000 added in February. Additionally, the unemployment rate has dropped to 8.8% which is the lowest level since March of 2009. The rate has also dropped by a full percentage point over the last four months.

The official numbers also revealed that the unexpected job growth took place primarily within the private sector. Private businesses added 230,000 jobs. In fact, the private sector has added 1.8 million jobs since last year and a third of those were created in the last three months. In contrast, the public sector which Romney considers to be a bloated payroll which wastes taxpayer dollars lost 14,000 jobs last month. So let’s see, continued private sector job growth and continued taxpayer funded public payroll reduction seems to represent what Romney and other Republicans have been clamoring for all along.

These job figures by the way, are in sharp contrast to the numbers produced by the Mit(wit). You might recall that while running for Governor of Massachusetts, Romney promised Bay State voters that he would use his business savvy to create many new jobs. Did he fulfill his promise? Not exactly. During his full term in office, Massachusetts ranked 47th in the nation in terms of job creation according to the U.S. Labor Department. The only states that created fewer jobs were Ohio, Michigan and Louisiana. Also, when you examine Romney’s job creation ranking during the first two years of his administration (the period that Obama has now been in office), you will discover that Massachusetts ranked 50th. What makes those figures even worse is the fact that Romney governed during a time of national economic prosperity.

Romney’s job creation performance was not any better while he was in the private sector. Romney of course, was a primary partner of Bain Capital, which bought, sold, and merged dozens of companies. In the process, Romney slashed thousands of jobs and shipped thousands more oversees. The New York Post also revealed the following companies which Bain purchased and then led into bankruptcy:

* Bain in 1988 put $5 million down to buy Stage Stores, and in the mid-’90s took it public, collecting $100 million from stock offerings. Stage filed for bankruptcy in 2000.

* Bain in 1992 bought American Pad & Paper (AMPAD), investing $5 million, and collected $100 million from dividends. The business filed for bankruptcy in 2000.

* Bain in 1993 invested $60 million when buying GS Industries, and received $65 million from dividends. GS filed for bankruptcy in 2001.

* Bain in 1997 invested $46 million when buying Details, and made $93 million from stock offerings. The company filed for bankruptcy in 2003.

Those pesky little facts sure can get in the way of a good dose of Romney misinformation. The Democratic National Committee responded best to Romney’s misplaced criticism of the Obama administration by saying,

“Perhaps before attacking the President’s record – which has seen an increase of more than 1.5 million private sector jobs over 12 consecutive months – Romney should examine his own record, which the Boston Globe called ‘one of the worst in the country.’”

Should he decide to run for the presidency in 2012, Mitt Romney will be forced to defend his job creation numbers in the primary debates. His Republican opponents will surely enjoy watching him sweat as he tries to defend his poor performance. They might even enjoy it as much as they will revel in pointing to the fact that his RomneyCare was the blueprint for ObamaCare. I personally cannot wait to step into my favorite pair of flip-flops while watching the Mit(wit) contradict himself and change policy positions time and again during the televised debates.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more singing along with today’s topical, song parody. Please enjoy!

The Great Pretender song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1oJuwkXr0E

MITT IS THE GREAT PRETENDER

(sung to The Platters song “The Great Pretender”)

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Pretending that he is so swell
His needs are such; he pretends too much
The truth he simply cannot tell

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Romney’s true beliefs are unknown
Mitt plays the game; flip-flops without shame
With no firm beliefs of his own

He was pro-choice he had us all believe
But when he faced strife, he switched up to pro-life

Oh yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
His opinion changes by town
Mitt claims to be what he’s not; you see
He wears his deceit like a crown
Romney is a flip-flopping clown

In Mass., health reform was what he achieved
He now says he feels health reform needs repeal

Yes, Mitt’s the great pretender
Just switching positions around
Ol’ Mitt Romney is not what you see
He wears his deceit like a crown
Romney is a flip-flopping clown

Tea-Baggers Squeezed Dry In Massachusetts

Pres. Barack Obama and MA Gov. Deval Patrick

It was not all bad news yesterday. The Democrats lost the House as expected but they maintained control of the Senate. Consequently, there is no chance that radically conservative bills can emerge from Congress. Furthermore, virtually all of Sarah Palin’s hand chosen Tea Party crackpots lost. The voters said “no” to Sharron “2nd Amendment remedies” Angle. The voters said “no” to Christine “Masturbation is Adultery” O’Donnell. The voters said “no” to Linda “Women are Sex Objects” McMahon. The voters said “no” to Carly “Worst CEO in History” Fiorina. The voters said “no” to Meg “Illegal Housekeeper” Whitman. The voters said “no” to John “Lasers in the Sky” Raese. The voters said “no” to Sean “Privatize Social Security” Bielat. The voters said “no” to Tom “Let’s Bomb Mecca” Tancredo. And, it looks like the voters will say “no” to Joe “Dump Social Security” Miller and Dino “Repeal Wall Street Reform” Rossi. In short, Sarah Palin was “refudiated” in a big way.

Additionally, it is now apparent that Scott “Nudist” Brown’s Tea Party fueled Senate victory in Massachusetts last January was a fluke. Unlike most every other state (with the notable exceptions of New York and California), Massachusetts elected Democrats to virtually every elective office yesterday. Indeed, the state is bluer today than it was yesterday.

Brown’s surprise election was heralded (mostly by the Boston Herald Enquirer) as the beginning of a Republican revolution in the Bay State. He emboldened the state G.O.P. to challenge incumbent Democrats for the first time in decades. Problem is, the Republicans had no credible candidates. Additionally, Brown’s victory did not serve to energize the G.O.P. as much as it served to awaken and energize the hibernating Democratic Party voters who had become complacent after so many years of success. In short, Massachusetts voters vowed that they would not be fooled again. And they were not.

In yesterday’s elections, all statewide elected offices, including a closely fought governor’s race, and the entire 10-member US House delegation remained in Democratic hands, despite a national tide that left Republicans celebrating large gains last night. The Boston Globe reports that Peter Ubertaccio, a political science professor at Stonehill College said, “I don’t know how they view this as anything but a total disaster. I just don’t know what a political party does if all indicators across the nation, across the state, all point to a Republican year and they can’t win any races.”

Perhaps longterm Congressman Barney Frank put it best in his victory speech when he said, “The campaigns run by most Republicans were beneath the dignity of a democracy, and I am delighted they were repudiated.’’

Lynnrockets congratulates:

Deval Patrick
Barney Frank
John Tierney
Bill Keating
John Olver
Richard Neal
Jim McGovern
Niki Tsongas
Ed Markey
Mike Capuano
Stephen “Dino” Lynch
Steve Grossman
Suzanne Bump
Martha Coakley
Bill Galvin
Ben Downing
James Timilty
Mike Rodrigues
Mark Montigny
Dan Wolf
Steve Baddour
Fred Berry
Barry Finegold
Tom McGee
Jim Welch
Gale Candaras
Eileen Donaghue
Cynthia Creem
Karen Spilka
Sal DiDomenico
Jim Eldridge
Brian Joyce
John Keenan
Therese Murray
Marc Pacheco
Tom Kennedy
Anthony Petruccelli
Mike Bush
Harriette Chandler
Steve Brewer
Jen Flanagan and
Richard Moore

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Scott Brown's favorite birthday suit

Charlie Brown song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_UnPzp2lmNk

SCOTTIE BROWN

(sung to the Coasters song “Charlie Brown”)

Fe-fe, fi-fi, fo-fo, fum
He’s the senator that will bare his bum

Scottie Brown, Scottie Brown
He’s a clown, that nude Scott Brown
He likes to bare his bod
In those magazines
(That’s why everybody’s always pickin’ on me)

That’s him on his knees
I know that’s him
Yeah, from 7 come 11
Down in the Senate gym

Scottie Brown, Scottie Brown
He’s a clown, that nude Scott Brown
Craig thinks that he’s hot
He hopes to steal a peek
(Why’s Lynnrockets always pickin’ on me)

Who’s always nude at the roll call?
Who’s lurking in the men’s room stalls?
Who’s sporting his bat and balls?
Guess who? (who me?) yeah, you!

Who walks through the Senate dumb and slow?
Who calls Mitch McConnell, Daddy-O?

Scottie Brown, Scottie Brown
He’s going down, next time around
His votes can be bought
Just you wait and see
(Why’s everybody always pickin’ on me)

(musical interlude)

He is in the Party that says “No”
With his private parts swinging to and fro

Scottie Brown, Scottie Brown
He’s a clown, that nude Scott Brown
He’s showing a lot
His bum, his wee-wee
(Why’s Lynnrockets always pickin’ on me)

Palin Shunned In Massachusetts (Again)

It's Inevitable!

Sarah Palin may be one of the hottest names in conservative politics this election season, but she can cross  Massachusetts off her list of stops. The former half-term ex-quitting governor of Alaska took a personal gut-punch in the Bay State last April at her Tea Party Rally on Boston Common when Scott Brown, the state’s only G.O.P. member of Congress avoided the event. Brown was endorsed by Palin and the Tea Party in his surprising election victory to capture Ted Kennedy’s former Senate seat. Once elected however, Brown betrayed both by voting with the Democrats on a bitterly contested jobs bill and then by voting with the Democrats once again to break the Republican filibuster of the financial reform bill. Brown has realized that to be re-elected in the virtually all-Democratic Bay State, he must be quite moderate and he must distance himself from the radical conservatism of Palin and the Tea Party.

Brown’s rejection of Palin and her political philosophy did not sit well with the “Queen of Quit”. She ran to her BFF, Fox News and said this about Massachusetts voters,

“Perhaps they’re not going to look for such a hard-core constitutional conservative there, and they’re going to put up with Scott Brown and some of the antics there, but up here in Alaska, and so many places in the U.S. where we have a pioneering, independent spirit, and we have an expectation that our representatives in D.C. will respect the will of the people and the intelligence of the people. Well, up here, we wouldn’t stand for that.”

That was then, this is now. Just this week another Republican from Massachusetts has publicly shunned Sarah Palin. Jeff Perry, the Republican candidate for the Massachusetts 10th Congressional District says if Palin offered to campaign for him, he would decline the endorsement. Asked during a televised interview what he would say if Palin requested to come to Massachusetts to stump for him, Perry said, “I’m going to say no.’’ Adding insult to injury he said, “I don’t want her to come down. She’s an entertainer.” Ouch, another blow that is sure to leave a mark on Palin’s easily bruised ego.

How will Palin respond? Will she head back to the friendly waters of Fox to hurl a nationwide insult at Perry? Will she resort to Facebook or Twitter to scribble some nearly indecipherable invectives about Perry? Or, will Perry’s shunning be the straw that breaks the “Barracuda’s” back and initiates that nervous breakdown that we all know is inevitable?

Stay tuned.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s very topical song parody.

Mother’s Little Helper song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tfGYSHy1jQs

PALIN’S LITTLE HELPER

(sung to the Rolling Stones song “Mother’s Little Helper”)

What a drag it is getting old
Palin’s different today
Todd has locked his wife away
Sarah needs something today to calm her down
Thanks to our new Health Care Bill
She’s entitled to a pill
Though she’s gone quite helter skelter, she’s got Palin’s little helper
She takes four or five a day, helps those voices go away

Sarah’s different today
I just overheard her say
That she thinks the tabloid Globe is just a rag
She says that the rumor’s fake, that she’s really not half baked
And goes running for the shelter of her Palin’s little helper
Before they put her away, she gets on her knees to pray

Doctor please, some more of these
Sarah needs more, don’t lock that door
She’s a hag and she’s getting old

Men just aren’t the same today
She wants Todd to go away
It’s his antics that caused her to just retire
Sarah’s never satisfied and now must pacify her mind
Let’s all watch her sweat and swelter as the white coats try to help her
Is the strait-jacket too tight? Can she still put up a fight?

The C4P’s and G.O.P.’s
Try to ignore, that mean press corps
What a drag she is to behold

Life’s just much too hard today
I heard Sarah Palin say
That she thinks that Tina Fey is just a whore
She just wants to stand and pose in her brand new store bought clothes
Now she’s gone quite helter skelter is there anyone can help her?
Or will she stay locked away, straight on through her dying day?

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 33

Just a few noteworthy news satelites that have been careening around the blogosphere this week.

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s episode of “Rush To Judgment” features conservative radio comedian Rush Limbaugh. He blamed the labor union for failing to fight for protections for the 29 miners that were killed when Massey Energy’s mine in Montcoal, WV exploded under unsafe conditions. That mine’s owners had been sited for some 50 safety violations during the month prior to the tragedy. Limbaugh said,

Was there no union responsibility for improving mine safety? Where was the union here? Where was the union? The union is generally holding these companies up demanding all kinds of safety. Why were these miners continuing to work in what apparently was an unsafe atmosphere?

Umm, Rush, this was a non-union mine. When the employees tried to unionize, they were threatened with losing their jobs! But don’t let the facts get in the way. Limbaugh also announced that more than 30,000 people attended the Tea-Party rally on Boston Common when no other estimates exceeded 5000.

THIS JUST IN:  The Commonwealth of Massachusetts announced this week that it will penalize large national banks that do not lower credit card interest rates for consumers. The Washington Post reports, “State Treasurer Timothy Cahill said the state has removed Bank of America, Citi and Wells Fargo from a list of institutions approved for new state investments. Massachusetts, which is the only state to make such a move, is also beginning to divest $243 million in funds held at those banks, though the process could take up to six months.” Massachusetts’ action, “has reignited advocacy groups that support creating a national usury law after a 1978 Supreme Court decision found that interest rate caps could apply only to state-chartered lenders. As a result, many banks moved their headquarters to states with looser usury laws, such as Delaware, allowing them to bypass limits set in other states.” Massachusetts law caps interest rates at 18 percent. “Last week, state officials met with officials from Bank of America, where Massachusetts has $231 million in investments, to request that it meet that cap for state residents. When the bank declined, Cahill said, his office decided it would shift the funds into other accounts. Massachusetts also has $9 million invested with Citi and $3 million with Wells Fargo.” Good for you, Massachusetts.

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s edition of “They’re So Crazy They’re Dangerous” features the Oklahoma Tea Party leaders who are petitioning state legislators to create, “a new volunteer militia to help defend against what they believe are improper federal infringements on state sovereignty.” You read that correctly, the Tea-Baggers want to legally arm themselves to fight a war against the United States’ Military. I thought the Tea-Baggers honored the troops. Guess not. Who knew?

THIS JUST IN:  Mediamatters.org reports, “A New York Times poll has revealed that a majority of ‘Tea Party supporters’ named Fox News as the television network they ‘watch most for information about politics and current events.’ It should come as little surprise then that the tea party supporters polled also held positions that reflect misinformation pushed by Fox News on a variety of topics including socialism and the federal budget deficit.”

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s edition of “It Is Great To Be Patriotic” features Republican Senator, moonbat crazy Michele Bachmann (Turner Overdrive), who said on a radio talk show this week, “We’re, we’re, we’re hoping that President Obama’s policies don’t succeed.”

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “He Must Have Forgotten To Take His Medication” features Fox News owner Rupert Murdoch who surprisingly demanded that television host Sean Hannity return immediately from a planned appearance on behalf of the Tea-Party because Fox News should not be supporting the movement. Murdoch said, “I don’t think we should be supporting the Tea Party or any other party.” Well then, what will they have left to talk about? Our guess is that Fox may finally have realized that the Tea-Party support may reflect badly on the network’s ratings.

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s edition of “I Simply Cannot Stop Lying” features Fox News host Bill O”Reilly. He denied Republican Senator Tom Coburn’s charge that Fox News hosts have suggested that citizens could be thrown in jail if they do not buy health insurance after passage of the new health reform law. Let’s check the video…

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

The Who’s Baba O’Reilly (Teenage Wasteland) song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Ik_K3s7B2A

BLAH, BLAH O’REILLY

(sung to The Who song “Baba O’Reilly [Teenage Wasteand])

Out here on the air
Unbalanced, not fair
I earn my pay with all my fibbing
My show really bites
Just watch tonight
I’ll be on your television

Don’t cry
Don’t hide your eyes
It’s only Bill-O’s Wasteland

Coulter, take my hand
We’re in Fox News Land
We all are liars
“Pinheads” on our shoulders
The Exorcist is here
He’ll drive out all the queers
Dressed all in leather
They could not get much bolder

Bill-O’s Wasteland
It’s only Bill-O’s Wasteland
Bill-O’s Wasteland
It’s only Bill-O’s Wasteland
They’re all wasted

(classic Who musical harmonica fade-out)

Confused Scott Brown Angers Conservatives By Pursuit Of Pork

Yesterday, The Boston Globe exposed the dilemma that faces a Republican Senator in Democratic Massachusetts. Scott Brown has already been exposed on this blog for changing his position on health care reform. As a state senator, he voted in favor of Governor Mitt Romney’s Massachusetts health care reform law which is essentially a mirror image of the newly enacted national health care reform law. While campaigning for the US Senate last fall however, Brown suddenly changed his tune and vehemently opposed the national plan so as to garner conservative and Tea-Bagger support for all things anti-Obama. Luckily for the nation, Brown never had the opportunity to cast the “41st vote against health care reform”.  Now Brown faces another embarrassing flip-flop of position.

Those of you that followed Brown’s Senate race will recall that he also ran on the conservative mantra of pledging to eliminate unnecessary government spending. The Boston Globe reported yesterday however, that “Senator Scott Brown says he will fight to fund a multibillion-dollar weapons program that could generate jobs in Massachusetts but that the Pentagon insists it does not need, sparking criticism that Brown is breaking his campaign vow to rein in wasteful spending.” It added, “The Pentagon since 2006 has said that the primary engine for the F-35, built by Pratt & Whitney, in East Hartford, Conn., is sufficient, and that producing a backup model will siphon away money that could be spent on other defense priorities.” But, “the Bay State Republican’s support for General Electric’s (of Lynn, MA) bid to build a backup engine for the F-35 Joint Strike Fighter puts the new Senator in the middle of a confrontation over congressional earmarks with the Obama administration, which has threatened a presidential veto.”

Conservative spending critics say Brown is abandoning his personal pledge to battle pork barrel spending in Washington.

“This is yet another example of how ‘fiscally responsible’ lawmakers have a giant blind spot when it comes to defense spending in their districts,’’ said Laura Peterson, a senior national security analyst at Taxpayers for Common Sense, a nonpartisan budget watchdog group that monitors earmarks. “His support was clearly driven by parochial concerns rather than financial ones.’’

“If Scott Brown helps out GE he will be doing exactly the opposite of what he said he would do when he ran,’’ said Loren Thompson, a defense budget specialist at the Lexington Institute in Arlington, Va., which is supported by multiple defense firms, including Pratt & Whitney.

“We have reached a critical point in this debate where spending more money on a second engine for the [F-35] is unnecessary, wasteful, and simply diverts precious modernization funds from more pressing [military] priorities,’’ William J. Lynn, the deputy secretary of defense, told Congress in a February memo.

Scott Brown now finds himself in a true “catch 22″. If he fights to maintain the funding for the unnecessary back-up engine, he will please the generally Democratic citizens of Massachusetts by bringing jobs to the state, but he will anger fiscal conservatives that supported him as the result of his pledge to rein in government spending. If, on the other hand, he reverses his support for the engine program, the Tea-Baggers will be happy but his constituents will criticize him for depriving the state of needed jobs while his predecessor, Senator Ted Kennedy was able to sustain the program for the last six years. That inability to bring home the bacon will be remembered by Bay State voters when Brown seeks re-election in 2012.

Scott Brown is now in a pickle over pork. Kudos to The Boston Globe for bringing it to our attention.

We would also like to congratulate the Boston College men’s hockey team for defeating Miami of Ohio last night by the score of 7 to 1 and thereby advancing to the NCAA championship game. Boston College will face Wisconsin tomorrow with the national title on the line. Go, Eagles!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.


Centerfold song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNhnThb8gEw

SCOTT BROWN IS THE CENTERFOLD

(sung to the J. Geils Band song “Centerfold”)

C’mon !
Does he walk? Does he talk?
Is he G.O.P.?
Scott Brown’s a Men’s Room angel
Larry Craig would share his seat

His buns are white like snowflakes
No underwear to stain
He poses like a sweet angel
Naked but with no brain

This sad guy loves posing in those porno magazines
He’s like a nudist angel and he’s pimping out his teens

(CHORUS)
He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

Nude behind his Senate desk
This girlie man should be in a dress
Can he see that Larry Craig
Is giving him the eye

He is naked but for shoes
Much too indecent for the news
You must wear clothes on TV
They told that Scott Brown guy

Wear diapers like Dave Vitter
They do not cover  much
Or simply wear a negligee
That would be a nice touch

(CHORUS)
He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

(na, na, na, na, na, na…..)

It’s okay we understand
Scott’s nudity should not be banned
But while prancing on the Senate lawn
We wish he would keep his clothes on

Take his truck, Yes he will
He’ll take that truck and drive it
He says the cab has lots of room
For his ass and his private

He says that his bod’s really ripped
He loves it when his clothes are stripped
Oh, no, Scott can’t deny it
Oh yeah, it’s time for him to diet!

(CHORUS)
He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
That Scott Brown is the centerfold
Scott Brown is the centerfold

He must be cold
A naked man if truth be told
Scott Brown is the centerfold

(REPEAT)

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