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Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 83

Just a few newsworthy items (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week but may have escaped your attention. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS:  Representative Paul Ryan, the House Budget Committee chairman who has become a star in the Republican Party with his plan to destroy Medicare, is emerging as an unpopular figure among Americans. By a margin of 57 percent to 34 percent, recent Bloomberg poll respondents say they would be worse off if Ryan’s plan to convert Medicare to a system of subsidized private health coverage were adopted.Fifty-eight percent of independents, a critical voting bloc in recent elections, say they would be worse off. That’s likely to encourage Democrats to bank their success in next year’s presidential and congressional races on tying Republicans to the Medicare plan, which was passed by the Republican-controlled House on April 15.

THIS JUST IN:  The Republican controlled House has approved a bill removing a barrier to companies seeking to drill for oil in some areas offshore. The White House opposes the measure, saying it deprives citizens of a way to challenge permits and would also increase air pollution. Is it a surprise to anyone that the party that hates mother earth is up to its old tricks once again?

BREAKING NEWS:  The folks over at Buzzflash were spot-on when they concluded that it appeared that Minnesota’s moonbat-crazy Republican Rep. Michele Bachmann did well in last week’s GOP debate simply as the result of “not spewing vomit as her head twisted around”! Doesn’t everyone love a good “Exorcist” reference?

THIS JUST IN:  Just wondering, but if the Republicans know so much about creating jobs, then why was there negative job growth from 2000 through 2007 when they were in control of the government and it was a period of relative economic prosperity?

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s episode of “Leave It To The Courts To Redress Faulty GOP Policy” features Republican Indiana Governor Mitch Daniels and his law which eliminated funding to Planned Parenthood. U.S. District Court Judge Sarah Evans on Friday granted a preliminary injunction preventing Indiana from enforcing the law that eliminated funding to the organization because it performs abortions.

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of “Dazed And Confused” features the Republican members of the House. The majority party attempted to disgrace the President by rebuking his actions in Libya and cutting the funds for the military action. Problem is, the GOP does not know what it wants. In a very confusing action, the House voted to rebuke the President for the action, but also voted to continue funding the action. It is obvious that Speaker John Boehner has no control over his minions. This was an embarrassing defeat for the Republicans.

BREAKING NEWS:  The next time that some Republican tells you Texas is the best job creation state in the Union and that GOP gov. Rick Perry deserves the credit, remind them of this. ThinkProgress reveals that the theory that Perry has a stellar record on job creation is simply not true. As the Austin American-Statesman noted, “while the national unemployment rate is 9.1 percent and the Texas unemployment rate is 8 percent, some 23 states, including New York, have lower unemployment rates.” In addition, “jobs grew at about the same rate during Democrat Ann Richards’ four years as governor” as they have under Perry. Moreover, as it turns out, Texas is in fact leading the nation in one employment metric — the number and percentage of minimum wage jobs. Additionally, Texas has by far the largest number of employees working at or below the federal minimum wage.

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of “This Deserves Repeating” features Teapublican Sarah Palin. When the former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska told reporters that she would like to meet the Prime Minister during her world tour next month, a Thatcher aide reportedly said, “Lady Thatcher will not be seeing Sarah Palin. That would be belittling for Margaret. Sarah Palin is nuts.”

BREAKING NEWS:  Inasmuch as infamous Boston Irish Mob Boss and the nation’s “Most Wanted” villain, Whitey Bulger was captured last week, we were wondering what Martin Scorsese’s sequel to the film “The Departed” will be entitled. Perhaps “The Recently Apprehended” or “The Returned”? Any other suggestions?

THIS JUST IN:  Fox News Comment of the week. Headline: “Suspect in Custody for ‘Suspicious” backpack is Marine Corps Reservist.” Comment: “All of you liberals, illegal immigrants, and muslims need to be rounded-up and put into camps that are surrounded by razor-wire!!!” How is that for conservative intellectualism?

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s episode of “How Soon They Are Forgotten” features former Fox News host and self-described “rodeo clown” Glenn Beck. Honestly think about this for a moment. When was the last time you heard anything about the now near-invisible Beck? Well, TPM reports that Glenn Beck said Thursday that he will be visiting the former Nazi death camp Auschwitz in a visit to Poland, and he’ll broadcast a special from a town outside of the camp because this will help him “figure out,” he says, “how did this happen?” Beck went on to say, “Poland, I didn’t know this when I first started doing my research. Poland rose up, a lot of Poles rose up, to try to help the Jews but they had nothing left. They had no arms.” Apparently Beck’s research failed to reveal that Poland “did not exactly have a reputation for passionate philo-Semitism. Towards the end of the war, anti-Jewish riots even broke out in several Polish cities as Jews were returning to their homes.” It is nice to know that some things never change. Glenn Beck continues to misinform.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Crazy song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OVtpnpCOKM

HE’S CRAZY

(sung to the Patsy Cline song “Crazy”)

Crazy
Glenn Beck is a demented phony
He’s crazy
Marbles? He’s missing a few

We knew
He was one of Bellevue’s “Most Wanted”
And that someday
He’d make an asylum debut

Sorry
Beck’s on a mental safari
Wondrin’
How did he go so koo-koo

Oh, crazy
Glenn’s crazy and back on the home brew
There’s no use denyin’
Beck can’t stop cryin’
Glenn Beck’s crazy
And stupid too

Crazy
We’re not sure that Beck’s not sniffing glue
It seems like he’s flyin’
We’re not just implyin’
Glenn Beck’s crazy
We know it’s true

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 82

Just a few newsworthy items (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week but may have escaped your attention. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s episode of “Don’t Let Facts Get In The Way Of  A Good Lie” features Republican presidential candidate Tim “Good ‘n” Pawlenty. This week Tim Pawlenty said,

Keep in mind, whether it be the Bush tax cuts, the Reagan tax cuts, or other tax cuts, they always produce an increase in revenue. There’s no dispute about that…

Umm Tim, yes there is a dispute about that. As this graph shows, the 1981 Reagan tax cuts and the 2001/2003 Bush tax cuts were both followed by drops in revenue:

THIS JUST IN: Oh No! It was Weiner’s weiner!

BREAKING NEWS:  Prospective GOP presidential candidate and present Texas governor, Rick Perry wants to substantially cut funding for public education in his state to the extent that it may end public education. Few Texans should be surprised that their state wants to remove more financing from public education, since it has been doing so almost every year for the past decade. However, it is a sad commentary of a state that is almost last on the list of states providing quality public education. Hey, a stupid population is sure to vote Republican.

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of “Go Go Gophers” features Minnesota’s moonbat-crazy Michele Bachmann and Tim “Good ‘n” Pawlenty. Minnesota has a distinction in this presidential cycle, with two different candidates likely in the race for the Republican nomination. But as a new survey from Public Policy Polling (D) suggests, both former Gov. Tim Pawlenty and Rep. Michele Bachmann would lose their home state to President Obama were they the GOP nominee. So much for home field advantage.

BREAKING NEWS:  Speaking of home field advantage or the lack thereof, the same poll reveals that Barack Obama would crush former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney by a landslide margin of 57%-37% in the Bay State. The Mittwit is now unpopular in both of his home states of Massachusetts and Michigan.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Hypocrisy In Action” features New Jersey’s Republican Gov. Chris Christie. The self-proclaimed belt-tightening fiscal conservative who wants to drastically cut Medicaid eligibility in his state was caught taking a state owned helicopter to his son’s little league game. He only offered to refund the immensely expensive trip after he was caught.

BREAKING NEWS: Following in the footsteps of the buyer’s remorse demonstrated by Minnesotans, voters in Michigan have now initiated recall petitions against Republican Gov. Rick Snyder and 15 Republican legislators. Michigan voters are upset about the draconian emergency manager law, school cuts, the tax on pensions and other issues.

THIS JUST IN:  Fox News Comment of the week. Fox Headline: “Tracy Morgan’s Shocking Alleged Homophobic Rant: I’ll Kill My Son If He Acts Gay”. Fox news Comment: “If he’s serious that makes him a “go” at being a good dad too many parents have failed their children over the years. I’d off mine if he turned out gay. Homosexuality is disgusting, disturbing and wrong on every level. I like his idea.” Wow! How is that for an informed Fox news fan?

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Face-Slap Of The Week” features Sarah Palin. The former ex-quitting half-term Gov. of Alaska told the British newspaper The Guardian,

“I am going to Sudan in July and hope to stop in England on the way. I am just hoping Mrs Thatcher is well enough to see me as I so admire her.”

In response, the paper reported that a Margaret Thatcher associate said,

“Lady Thatcher will not be seeing Sarah Palin. That would be belittling for Margaret. Sarah Palin is nuts.”

Wow! That is sure to leave a mark!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Carefree Highway song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZbWM2whkVq4

WASILLA HIGHWAY

(sung to the Gordon Lightfoot song “Carefree Highway”)

Pickin’ up the pieces of my sweet Alaskan dream
I wonder how “Joe Sixpack” is tonight
Her name was Sarah, she wore rimless glasses on her face
She was Guv and she was quite uptight
Wasilla Highway, let her slip away on you
Wasilla Highway, she’s seen better days
The Sarah Palin blues from her beehive to her shoes
Wasilla Highway, please take her away
Her away on you.

Turnin’ back the pages to the good Ol’ Palinfest
I wonder if she’ll ever be the same
During interviews she only stumbled and then lied
Now all she has is Levi left to blame
Wasilla Highway, poor old Sarah was so lame
Wasilla Highway, she’s seen better days
The Sarah Palin blues induced by mainstream nightly news
Wasilla Highway, just take her away
Her away on you

Searchin’ through the fragments of a career that once was
I wonder if “Joe the Plumber” is still kind
Was it Ross, Levi, Wooten or Diana Palin’s bust
Or some other secret she wants left behind
Wasilla Highway, did she sneak away on you
Wasilla Highway, she’s seen better days
The mornin’ after blues will she turn to cheap-ass booze?
Wasilla Highway, did she sneak away
Sneak away on you

Did she sneak away on you
Wasilla Highway, she’s got no-one left to blame
Wasilla Highway, left without delay
No more nightly news for the Gov with fancy shoes
Wasilla Highway, let her sneak away
Sneak away on you

Sarah Palin: “Is Margaret Thatcher The Author Of Harry Potter?”

"Give me just a second, I know who Thatcher is"

Another tasty chestnut from the recent Vanity Fair article about Sarah Palin is this:

Early in the 2008 campaign, when John McCain’s aides discovered that Alaska-size gaps existed in Palin’s general knowledge (among those previously unreported: she had no idea who Margaret Thatcher was), they from time to time would give her some books to read in hopes of improving the candidate’s learning curve. On one such occasion, Palin accepted the books, set them aside, and for the next 25 minutes was held rapt by one of her three BlackBerrys.

Eventually, an aide asked, “What are you working on?”

“I’m reading these great e-mails,” she said, “from the prayer warriors.”

It has now been confirmed that while her son suffers from a disabling genetic condition, Sarah Palin is “retarded”. (Thanks nswfm)

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Imagine song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XLgYAHHkPFs&feature=related

IMAGINE

(Sung to the John Lennon song “Imagine”)

Imagine there’s no Sarah
She’s in a doublewide
No more winks and blinks
No Bristol the child bride
Imagine all Alaskans
Living life in peace…

(Aye-hi-hi-i-i-i…)

Imagine “thanks but no thanks”
Was never said at all
There was no “Joe the Plumber”
She stayed at City Hall
Imagine Americans
Spared from Sarah P….

(You-hoo-oo-oo-oo)

You may say that we’re dreamers
But we’re having tons of fun
The First Dude claims she’s a screamer
And she’s certainly no nun

Imagine a “pig with lipstick”
I’m certain that you can
Remember Katie Couric
And Gibson, he’s “the Man”
Imagine all the people
Tina Fey also…

(You-hoo-oo-oo-oo)

You may say that we’re dreamers
But we’re not the only ones
Levi Johnston’s right with us
And he’s got Sarah’s grandson

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