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Childish Michelle Malkin Has A Meltdown

Why does Fox News consistently avoid utilizing mature adults as guests on its programs? It is understood that the number of legitimate and serious conservative pundits is extremely limited, but Fox News seems to revel in giving airtime to child-like whiners. Consider the number of times that Sean Hannity and Bill O’Reilly have hosted the likes of Sarah Palin, Ann Coulter and Donald Trump rather than George F. Will or Peggy Noonan.

Wednesday night was a perfect example of Fox‘s studio serving as a psuedo-televised day-care for what appeared to be an over-tired and cranky guest. This time the bratty baby du jour was conservative blogger Michelle Malkin. She and Juan Williams were guests on the Hannity program and the topic was the alleged leaking of information from the Obama administration regarding proposed cyber attacks on Iran’s nuclear facilities.

Setting aside the actual content of the subject and debate between Williams and Malkin (and her cheerleader Sean Hannity), it was entertaining (and disturbing) to witness the histrionics of Michelle Malkin. She was so overly concerned with attacking her debate opponent that she resorted to making faces, eye-rolling, sneering and huffing. Most entertaining was her kindergarten-like schoolyard repetitive mocking of Williams when she exclaimed, “All you can do, Juan, is say, ‘Plame, Plame, Plame’ and ‘blame, blame, blame, Bush, Bush, Bush!” She also went on a childish name-calling tantrum when she said, “The American people are sick of the kind of snotty condescension from liberal elite journalists like Juan Williams.” But as they say, “a video is worth a thousand words”, so let’s enjoy the show:

It is people like Michelle Malkin that make blogging so fun for so many of us.

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along to today’s song parody.

The Monster Mash song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FeZftK2kO6U

THE MALKIN MASH

(sung to the Bobby “Boris” Pickett song “Monster Mash”)

She was mouthing off with gab late one night
Malkin’s strange visage, an eerie sight
My blood pressure and pulse both began to rise
What’s up with that weird lazy eye?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

She was ruminating on Obama’s speech
When her logic and her brains went to the beach
We knew she was lying by her growing nose
Inside her skull, a mighty wind blows

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Dear Malkin was having fun
Her air-time had just begun
It was quite apparent that
Michelle had come undone

The show was rockin’ with her babbling sounds
Michelle spewing sentences without nouns
There were blood-shot lines in her crazy ass eyes
One thing missing was the strait-jacket guys

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Out from the closet came the Coulter thing
He was wearing his decoder ring
Waving it round because he was pissed
Have you ever seen so much hair on anybody’s fist?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Now everything’s cool, Coulter hid his big hand
And Malkin’s diatribe was critically panned
It was one giant laugh if it was viewed
Next time we see that jerk, she is sure to be booed.

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

GOP Flavor Of The Week Is Pizza and Rick Perry “Really Did Throw-Up All Over Himself”

Breaking News: Herman Cain won the GOP straw poll in Florida last Friday. The former owner of Godfathers’ Pizza is now the “flavor of the week” for Republicans. The highly touted Florida Straw Poll is important to members of the Grand Old Party because its winner has an unusually high percentage of eventually capturing the party’s nomination for President. Cain is the “flavor of the week” because although he won this particular contest, moonbat-crazy Michele Bachmann won the earlier Iowa Straw Poll and Mitt(wit) Romney won the Michigan Straw Poll and Ron “Civil Rights Act is Unconstitutional” Paul won the California Straw Poll. Strangely enough, the consensus Republican front-runner, Rick Perry has consistently failed to win any contests (or debates for that matter). Floridians appeared to be impressed by Cain’s “9 – 9 – 9″ taxation plan which many of them confused with Godfathers’ Pizza’s “9 – 9 – 9 Pizza Deal” which consisted of a 9 inch pizza with 9 toppings all for $9 dollars.

Lynnrockets also took one for the team and watched “Fox News Sunday“. It was very enlightening to learn that not only do all all the conservative Fox News pundits dislike the field of Republican Presidential candidates, but that they also believe that the majority of Republican voters are displeased with the lot. Panelist A.B Stoddard said the Cain win represented not only a disappointment over Perry, but a “dissatisfaction” with the current field amongst the GOP base. She said the poll was “a real slap toward Perry and Mitt Romney…they don’t like their choices at all”.  Bill Kristol piped-in by saying “70% of Floridians voted against the two front-runners (i.e Perry and Romney)” and “it was a vote of no confidence ” against both of them. He concluded by saying “these are very weak front-runners”. Juan Williams (the only quasi-liberal panelist) said, “there still is this hankering for someone else to come in”. Williams went on to say,

“The impression they are giving to the nation as a whole is that this is a very limited conversation among the Tea Party element or the far right of the Republican Party. Not only is it that they won’t except $3 dollars in cuts for $1 dollar in a tax hike, but it’s things like the immigration argument that really held center this week…If I’m Hispanic and I’m watching that show (the debate), I think, ‘Gee, these people don’t like me. They don’t like immigrants of any stripe’”.

It was Brit Hume however, who was the most caustic toward Perry in particular and the Republican field in general. He opened by saying,

Perry really did throw-up all over himself at the debate and at a time when he really did need to raise his game, … he did worse…Perry is about one half a step away from total collapse as a candidate…What keeps happening here is these people have a moment, they get into the race as Perry did and zoom to the top and everybody is in love, and then we get a dose of them… and they don’t seem so great.”

Let’s go to the tape. The Brit Hume statements begin at the 2:00 minute mark:

Batting next for the Republican Party: Chris Christie?

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

“All Together Now” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LtjhW-ERoak

ALL TOGETHER NOW

 (sung to the Beatles song “All Together Now”)

One, two, three, four
Rick Perry’s a Texan whore
Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten I loathe you

A, B, C, D
Bachmann’s drinking too much tea
E, F, G, H, I, J I loathe you

Boom, bam, boom
Boom, bam, boom

Mitt’s a dip
Boom, bam, boom
Newt’s crazy
Boom, bam, boom
Paul’s a dope
Boom, bam, boom
Where’s Christie?

All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now

Black, white, green, red
Listen to what Herm Cain said
Pink, brown, yellow, orange and blue I loathe you

All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now

Rick’s a twit
Boom, bam, boom
Jon’s a dweeb
Boom, bam, boom
Not a hope
Boom, bam, boom
Nobodies!

All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now
All together now….

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