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Scott Brown Beats Elders Down!

The emperor wears no clothes!

Senator Scott Brown (R-MA) may have just alienated a large segment of his support base. Last Friday the clothing-challenged Republican announced that he would vote in favor of Teapublican Paul Ryan’s (R-WI) House-passed budget plan which calls for the dissolution of Medicare and replacement with a voucher system. “The leaders will bring forward (Budget Committee Chairman Paul Ryan’s) budget, and I will vote for it, and it will fail,” he said. The consensus opinion of most analysts is that such a change would hurt the elderly in at least two ways. It would not only force elders to make difficult decisions about choosing from a multitude of confusing private health insurance policies at a time in their lives when (as the result of advancing age) they are less capable of making such decisions, but it would also subject them to being personally responsible for increasing premium and medical costs.

The Boston Globe reports that after “the House passed the budget, Senate majority leader Harry Reid, Democrat of Nevada, vowed that his chamber will hold a vote on it, forcing Brown and other potentially vulnerable Republicans in the 2012 elections to take a stance on the cuts. A vote is expected before Memorial Day.” It is the Democrats’ intent to force GOP Senators to either vote in favor of curtailing benefits to senior citizens (which may cause a voter backlash from this ever-growing voting bloc) or to vote against the Ryan plan as passed in the House (which will highlight a fracturing of Republican unity on the issue). It is a win/win situation for the Party of Roosevelt.

Of course Massachusetts Democrats are also determined to win back Edward M. Kennedy’s senate seat and Brown’s rejection of senior citizens may be the spark they need to accomplish that goal. Democrats were complacent in the special election of January 2010 and consequently, Scott Brown surprisingly won with the assistance of out of state Tea Party support and money. But a re-dedicated Democratic voting base re-emerged in the November mid-term elections and Democrats were victorious in every state-wide election. Furthermore, inasmuch as Brown has voted against the Tea Party on such issues as the financial regulatory overhaul and the repeal of the military’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy, his support from the group is in question.

Christen Varley, president of the Greater Boston Tea Party, told the Boston Herald that Brown may not be able to count on the Tea Party support in 2012. “I’m looking at the ‘Scott Brown’ bumper sticker on the back of my car and having serious doubts (about him),” Varley said. “We’ll all have to independently make a decision in 2012 about whether we’ll support him again.”

Scott Brown is now vulnerable to defeat in 2012. His decision not to assist law enforcement by means of identifying his alleged sexual molester and thereby potentially allowing a child molester to remain at large does not sit well with Massachusetts residents regardless of party affiliation. Now his lack of support for senior citizens gives potential Democratic opponents another point of attack. One confirmed challenger, Newton mayor Setti Warren said,

“If he indeed does plan to vote for the Ryan budget, that is an affront to workers, families, and seniors across Massachusetts. There are approximately 1 million Medicare beneficiaries in our state, yet the Ryan budget would gut and privatize that program.’’

The Boston Globe also reports that David Certner, legislative policy director of the AARP, the nation’s largest group representing retired Americans, said that the elderly are protective of Medicare because it plays such a huge role in their lives and well-being.

“They certainly perceive attacks on the program as something that is very much something they’re not interested in,’’ he said.

This Medicare vote could spell the end for Scott Brown’s US Senate tenure. Let’s hope so.

UPDATE

This just in!!! Scott Brown has suddenly pulled a Mitt Romney-sized flip-flop regarding his support for the Republicans’ Medicare Destruction Act. He appeared on a local Boston talk radio program yesterday and here is what transpired:

Radio Host: This specific proposal, the Ryan proposal to privatize Medicare, if it came up, does it have your support or it doesn’t?

Brown: First of all, it’s very difficult to get into hypotheticals because it’s not coming up, but the way that the Medicare and Medicaid proposals and a lot of other proposals in that bill are right now, no, I can’t support it, and I’ve made that very clear.

Wow, talk about reversing yourself. Does Scott brown have any firmly held convictions or beliefs?

Remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Downtown song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sku-1hqA5xw

SCOTT BROWN

(sung to the Petula Clark song “Downtown”)

If Mass. is your home
And you are full of baloney,
You must surely be – Scott Brown
You have your worries,
With no clothes in snow flurries
You’re a nudist boy – Scott Brown

You’re popular in the woods but were voteless in the city
Your term is only two years Scott, and isn’t that a pity?
You’re sure to lose

You’ve got some Mitt Romney hair
But it grows down on your buttocks, we’ve seen when you’re bare, and so
Scott Brown – politics of hate when you’re
Scott Brown – voted right out the door
Scott Brown – private life’s waiting for you
(Scott Brown, Scott Brown)

Don’t wear a frown
As the Tea-Baggers surround you
They are friends not foes – Scott Brown
The “Party of No”
Is just the place that they go to
Where their hatred grows – Scott Brown

Just charm them with the rhythm of your naked bossanova
They’ll be bare-assed with you too before the night is over
Happy again

They’ll take off their underwear
Then they’ll forget all their troubles, forget all their cares like you,
Scott Brown – not erudite or bright
Scott Brown – every nudist’s delight
Scott Brown – you’re gonna be alright now
(Scott Brown, Scott Brown, Scott Brown)

(Scott Brown, Scott Brown)

And you might find that your behind will help ingratiate you
With Larry Craig who loves the view and has a gentle hand to
Guide you along

You two would make quite a pair
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares dear bro
Scott Brown – you’ll get kicked out the door
Scott Brown – Won’t take a minute more
Scott Brown – Private life’s waiting for you

Scott Brown (Scott Brown) Scott Brown (Scott Brown)
Scott Brown (Scott Brown) Scott Brown (Scott Brown)
(repeat and fade out)

Tea Party Turning Tepid?

Is the Tea Party nothing more than a passing fad? Is the group of misinformed, angry, racist illiterates in the process of evaporating? Well, at least one Tea-Bagger survivor believes so.

CNN reports that Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid is predicting the demise of the Tea Party movement. “The Tea Party was born because of the economy,” Reid said in an interview on NBC‘s “Meet the Press” set to air Sunday. “The economy is probably the worst it’s ever been except for maybe the great depression. The Tea Party will disappear as soon as the economy gets better and the economy’s getting better all the time.”

Harry Reid of course, speaks from experience. You will remember that the Nevada Democrat won reelection in November against Sharron “2nd Amendment Remedies” Angle, a Tea Party-backed Republican candidate. Let’s hope that his prediction is correct. Politics can be dirty enough without the injection of a bunch of old, white, gun-toting, costumed vigilantes. Honestly, how can anyone that runs around dressed like George Washington be taken seriously?

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Garden Party song link:  http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x89fev_ricky-nelson-garden-party_music

TEA BAG PARTY

(sung to the Ricky Nelson song “Garden Party”)

I went to a Tea Bag party hoping to make some brand new friends
But they became my enemies, those right wing racist men
When I got to the Tea Bag party, they all looked the same
That really surprised me, and no one had a brain

But its all right now, I learned my lesson well
You see, ya can’t please everyone, so ya got to please yourself

Crazies there from miles around, mostly with white hair
Locals brought their shotguns, there was hatred in the air
‘n’ over in the corner, not to my surprise
Sarah Palin sportin’ F-me pumps while just winking her eyes

But its all right now, I learned my lesson well
You see, ya can’t please everyone, so they can go to hell

Lot-in-dah-dah-dah, lot-in-dah-dah-dah

Told them they were so wrong, Glenn Beck is insane
Drill Baby, Drill’s stupid,  and Palin is to blame
I said Rand Paul is crazy too, best not drink his tea
Then I told them things about Michele Bachmann they would not believe

But its all right now, I learned my lesson well
You see, ya can’t please everyone, so they can go to hell

Lot-dah-dah-dah (lot-dah-dah-dah)
Lot-in-dah-dah-dah

Someone opened up a closet door and donned a white pointy hood
Punching his railroad ticket to Hell and just the way he should
If you’re goin’ to a Tea Bag party, I wish you a lotta luck
Bring a misspelled sign, use racist slang and drive a pick-up truck

But its all right now, I learned my lesson well
You see, ya can’t please everyone, so ya got to please yourself

Lot-dah-dah-dah (lot-dah-dah-dah)
Lot-in-dah-dah-dah

But its all right now, I learned my lesson well
You see, ya can’t please everyone, so ya got to please yourself

The Craziness That Is Sharron Angle

 

Vote for me!

 

Sharron Angle is the 2010 Teapublican nominee for the U.S. Senate seat in Nevada currently held by Democrat Harry Reid. She wants to ban all abortions even in the case of rape, wants to privatize the Veterans’ Administration, wants to abolish the Social Security and Medicare programs, wants to outlaw the sale and consumption of alcohol and remove the fluoride from our water supply. Angle also says that if candidates like her are not elected this fall, the masses should resort to their “2nd Amendment remedies” (she advocates assassinations of public officials?). Last week Angle declared that Dearborn, Michigan and the non-existent town of Frankford, Texas are governed by Sharia law. Crazy enough for you? Oh, and she has another thing in common with Sarah Palin, pulling “n0 shows” at events in which she is scheduled to speak. The most recent example of this was this Tuesday when Angle failed to appear at a health care conference in Las Vegas. Angle’s no-show status is noteworthy because the candidate keeps such a low profile on the trail. Press shy Angle has unabashedly rejected the tradition of submitting to a public vetting by the press corps – or rather, the non-partisan press. She regularly grants interviews to Fox News and conservative radio. When she spoke at a reception with conservative radio host Heidi Harris last weekend, it was supposed to be open to the press, but when local television stations showed up they were told they couldn’t cover it. Sharron Angle truly is a psycho-chicken.

It now appears however, that Angle’s crazy antics are not sitting well with the Nevada electorate. Prior to Angle’s Republican primary election victory, incumbent Democrat Harry Reid was almost assured of losing the general election. He was disliked by conservatives for being too liberal and he was disliked by progressives for not being liberal enough. Any center/right Republican candidate would have crushed Reid in the general election and captured a Senate seat for the G.O.P. Such is no longer the case.

According to a Suffolk University survey released Wednesday, 46 percent of likely voters in Nevada support Reid, the top Democrat in the Senate, with 43 percent backing Angle, the GOP nominee and a former state lawmaker who enjoys strong support by many Tea Party activists. Reid’s three point margin is within the poll’s sampling error, but the Suffolk survey is one of two recent polls to have Reid ahead. The Suffolk University poll was conducted October 8-11, with 500 likely voters in Nevada questioned by telephone. The survey’s sampling error is plus or minus 4.4 percentage points. Hence, it would appear that Angle could lose an unloseable race for the Republicans in their quest to recapture the U.S. Senate.

The two candidates participated in their one and only debate last night. Not much happened other than Angle unsuccessfully attempting to explain her flip-flops on the privatization of Social Security and Medicare. Most of Angle’s rhetoric was unintelligible, but she did repeat “Obama-Care” over and over.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today;s topical song parody.

Sexy Sadie song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSDFkjwMwes

SHADY SHARRON

(sung to the Beatles song “Sexy Sadie”)

Shady Sharron you’ll soon be done
You’re just a fool to everyone
You’re just a fool to everyone
Shady Sharron ooh your fun is done

Shady Sharron you broke the rules
You’re just a clown we all can see
You’re just a clown we all can see
Shady Sharron oooh you’ll soon be schooled

The Tea Party was duped because they could have picked another
It all went wrong when Angle was their one
Shady Sharron will lose to Reid this Fall

Shady Sharron, do you not know
Your Tea-Bagging days will be through
Your Tea-Bagging days will be through
Shady Sharron oooh you’re just a show

Shady Sharron you’ll get yours yet
However big you think you are
However big you think you are
Shady Sharron oooh you’ll get yours yet

She had a stage of her own on Fox News there on cable
Her crazy smile could frighten anything
Shady Sharron she’s the latest nutty sadist of them all

She’s just a fool to everyone

However big you think you are

Sharron’s New Angle on Hypocrisy

Remember last Spring when Republicans/Tea Partiers were enraged that the White House may have offered an unpaid position to Democratic Senate candidate Joe Sestak if he withdrew from the Senate primary and retained his House seat? Of course you do. Every elected Republican at the federal level was crying foul and right-wing radio buffoons such as Limbaugh, Hannity and Beck were calling for criminal investigations.

Well, “monkey see, monkey do”. CNN reports that Nevada GOP Senate nominee (and Sarah Palin endorsee) Sharron Angle urged third party candidate Scott Ashjian to pull out of the race at a meeting last week, saying his campaign could result in re-election for Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, according to an audio tape of the meeting recorded by Ashjian. Apparently during the session, she offered Ashjian access to several Republican Senators and “whatever juice I have” to help persuade him. Angle went on to say, “Anything I can deliver personally I am glad to.”

Ashjian released the audio-tape to a political journalist named Jon Ralston and the transcript was included in yesterday’s edition of the Las Vegas Sun. Ashjian also said, “She offered me political juice, I could have pretty much what I wanted.” However, while complimenting Angle as a nice person, he said her offers to him are exactly what is wrong with today’s politics. “She has given up her principles for the election,” Ashjian said.

Sharron Angle of course, needs no introduction. She is the radical nut-job that wants to ban all abortions even in the case of rape, wants to privatize the Veterans’ Administration, wants to abolish the Social Security and Medicare programs, wants to outlaw the sale and consumption of alcohol and remove the fluoride from our water supply. Oh and by the way, Angle says that if candidates like her are not elected this fall, the masses should resort to their “2nd Amendment remedies” (she advocates assassinations of public officials?). Wow, what a typical Republican/Tea Party crackpot!

Despite Angle’s promises however, Ashjian has chosen to remain in the race. Polls last month showed the race between Reid and Angle a dead heat with Ashjian pulling up to 5 percent support, depending on the survey. Obviously, Ashjian’s candidacy hurts only the moon-bat crazy Angle. Virtually every vote that Ashjian garners comes directly at the expense of Angle and helps incumbent Democrat Harry Reid.

So fellow Democrats, let’s hear it for Scott Ashjian. Hip, Hip, Hooray!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Three Times A Lady song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fjfq0Fr85Yg

THREE TIMES AS CRAZY

(sung to the Lionel Richie song “Three Times A Lady”)

How many times
Has she been dizzy
Sharron Angle’s the Tea-Bagging kind
And just like her chum
Sarah Palin the schizo
There’s something we must say out loud

They’re once, twice
Three times as crazy
And we loathe you
Yes, they’re once, twice
Three times as crazy
And we loathe you
We loathe you

When they are together
Common sense does perish
Angle and Palin aren’t too smart
F-Me shoes, but no clues
They’ll screw you, they’ll sue you
There’s no way to tell them apart

(instrumental)

They’re once, twice
Three times as crazy
And we loathe you
We loathe you

Sharron “Tea-Bagger” Angle Tries A New Angle

Harry Reid/Sharron Angle Debate

All the credit for this post goes to Salon.com and its wonderfully entertaining article about Nevada’s moon-bat crazy Republican candidate for US Senate, Sharron Angle. Rather than try to explain the article, here it is in its entirety. Please click the Salon.com link so that they get the credit they deserve.

Sharron Angle Denies Saying Things She Said

Sharron Angle just says words, ok? It’s not her job to make sure that the words are true, or make sense! So it’s not fair — it’s never fair — to ask her to explain what she meant, by these words. That’s GOTCHA JOURNALISM. And that is why Sharron Angle is totally justified in denying that she ever said things that she was recorded saying.

In a recent interview with ABC News, Angle denied saying that entitlement programs are a violation of the First Commandment, denied agreeing with a radio host that there are “domestic enemies” in Congress, and even denied saying that wonderful thing about “Second Amendment remedies.”

Karl asked Angle: “When you say if things don’t turn out the right way in this election, people may seek Second Amendment remedies. What did you mean by that?”

Angle replied, “No, I don’t think that was exactly the way I said it.”

She originally said it more like this:

“I hope that’s not where we’re going but you know if this Congress keeps going the way it is people are really looking toward those Second Amendment remedies and saying my goodness what can we do to turn this country around and I’ll tell ya the first thing we need to do is take Harry Reid out.”

As for the First Commandment thing? “No I didn’t say that,” Angle told Karl.

It is this explanation that I like the best:

She went on to say she was talking to a Christian broadcaster “in very Christian terms…. You speak the language of the folks you are communicating with, the language that I used is in our country we have become a country put our faith not in God we trust ….but in government we trust.”

And the language of Christians is apparently that our government is a false idol, and we should shoot it, with guns.

For those of you that may have missed the new Lynnrockets song parody about Sharron Angle which was posted last Friday, please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song which is re-posted today.

Psycho Killer song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Smge23DCE8

PSYCHO CHICKEN

(sung to the Talking Heads song “Psycho Killer”)

Sharron Angle is a Tea-Bagging hag
What her mouth needs is a silencing gag
She tells her fans to “open fire”
If her race comes down to the wire

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away

She starts a conversation she can’t even finish it
She’s talkin’ a lot but she’s not sayin’ anything
If she has her way, Medicare’s repealed
Sharron said once, that God hates gay men

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!!!

Angle is just so yellah
She spins like a propeller
She’s as cold as vichyssoise
Nevadans hope she just goes…away
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

She is vain and she is blind
She is the Tea Party kind

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!!!

Tea-Bagger Sharron Angle Morphs Into “Chicken Lady”

Remember back in August when moon-bat crazy Tea-Bagger Sharron Angle defeated Sue Lowden in the Nevada Republican US Senate primary. Lowden was known as “The Chicken Lady” because she insisted that Americans don’t need health-care reform when they can simply raise chickens and barter them in exchange for medical care. Angle of course, is the radical nut-job that wants to ban all abortions even in the case of rape, wants to privatize the Veterans’ Administration, wants to abolish the Social Security and Medicare programs, wants to outlaw the sale and consumption of alcohol and remove the fluoride from our water supply. Oh and by the way, Angle says that if candidates like her are not elected this fall, the masses should resort to their “2nd Amendment remedies” (she advocates assassinations of public officials?). Wow, was that ever a race between imbeciles!

Well, a funny thing happened on the way to the general election against Democratic Party incumbent, Harry Reid. First, the Tea-publican Angle began calling press conferences in which she refused to answer questions from the press. Next, she decided that she would not make herself available to the mainstream press in any way. And most recently we learned that she campaigned against a high school football team’s black uniforms because “black is the color of the devil”.

She also appeared on Fox and Friends (which nobody would consider mainstream media) and challenged Harry Reid to a debate. Indeed, just last week she appeared as a guest on Nevada’s  “Face to Face” and agreed to debate Harry Reid in an hour-long live broadcast from Reno on October 21st. Angle said, “What I would like to see is Harry Reid come into this studio with you and I and have a true debate.”

What Angle said and what she meant are two entirely different things however. We learned on Thursday that Angle has, shall we say “chickened out” of the debate. “Face to Face” host Joe Ralston said,  “that within hours of Reid accepting the debate challenge, Angle’s campaign called to say, well, its backing out now.” Ralston went on to say,

“I thought I had seen it all in this campaign. I guess not. I had agreement from Angle’s deputy campaign manager for this debate, but soon after we announced Reid had agreed to the date and place, her campaign spokesman called to say there was no agreement. I’m not making this up, folks. A campaign spokesman overrules a deputy campaign manager? I really don’t understand the hierarchy in that campaign.”

Fact is, absolutely everything about the Sharron Angle campaign is incomprehensible. By backing out of the debate that she requested, Angle has morphed into Nevada’s new “Chicken Lady”. She is a crazy woman of the highest degree and if she wins this election perhaps the sane people of Nevada should resort to their “2nd Amendment remedies”.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Psycho Killer song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Smge23DCE8

PSYCHO CHICKEN

(sung to the Talking Heads song “Psycho Killer”)

Sharron Angle is a Tea-Bagging hag
What her mouth needs is a silencing gag
She tells her fans to “open fire”
If her race comes down to the wire

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away

She starts a conversation she can’t even finish it
She’s talkin’ a lot but she’s not sayin’ anything
If she has her way, Medicare’s repealed
Sharron said once, that God hates gay men

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!!!

Angle is just so yellah
She spins like a propeller
She’s as cold as vichyssoise
Nevadans hope she just goes…away
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

She is vain and she is blind
She is the Tea Party kind

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!!!

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 41

Just a few noteworthy news satellites that have been careening around the blogosphere this week…

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “People In Glass Houses…” features California’s Republican nominee for US Senate Carly Fiorina. While preparing for a television news interview, the woman that drove Hewlett Packard into the ground before being fired said this about incumbent Democratic Party Senator Barbara Boxer whilst unaware that her microphone was live, “God, what is that hair? Soooo yesterday”. Such an insult coming from a woman that would be more aptly named Carly Purina.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Tea Party Hardy” features Tea Party candidate for Senate in Nevada, Sharron Angle. If you are unaware of Angle’s proposals, get a drink, sit down and get a load of these:

  • Bring more nuclear waste to Nevada.
  • Deregulate Big Oil; BP spill was only “an accident.”
  • Abolish the Education Department, Energy Department, EPA, United Nations and most of the IRS.
  • Eliminate Social Security — possibly Medicare and unemployment insurance too.
  • Outlaw alcohol.

That being said, let’s all congratulate Democrat Harry Reid on his re-election as Nevada Senator.

BREAKING NEWS: This week the racist, uneducated, drug addicted philanderer Rush Limbaugh was married for a fourth time. ‘Nuff said.

THIS JUST IN: U.S. government regulators warned in 2000 about the myriad problems that could be caused by a deepwater oil spill. But the George W. Bush administration ignored such warnings and issued an executive order in May 2001 that pushed to speed up the search for oil.  McLatchy reports,

A decade ago, U.S. government regulators warned that a major deepwater oil spill could start with a fire on a drilling rig, prove hard to stop and cause extensive damage to fish eggs and wetlands because there were few good ways to capture oil underwater, however, President George W. Bush ushered in the new era with an executive order on May 18, 2001, that pushed his new administration to speed up the search for oil.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Keep That Boycott Going” features Hall & Oates. The musical duo have canceled their July 2, 2010 concert in Arizona to protest the new racist Arizona immigration law. Other artists who have joined the Arizon boycott thus far include Cypress Hill, Pitbull, Rage Against the Machine, Kanye West, Sonic Youth, Carlos Santana, Willie Nelson, Joe Satriani, Tenacious D, Shakira and Massive Attack.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Conservatives Eating Their Young” features both Rush Limbaugh and Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly. In a new biography on sale Tuesday, Rush Limbaugh calls fellow conservative talk show host Bill O’Reilly a “Ted Baxter” — after the fictional character on the “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” who was portrayed as a vain, shallow, buffoonish TV newsman. Now that is insulting. Insulting to Ted Baxter, that is.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “Facts Don’t Lie” features the ten states with the lowest percentage of college graduates according to The Chronicle of Higher Education. Drumroll please. Arkansas, West Virginia, Nevada, New Mexico, Oklahoma, Alaska, Arizona, Texas, Tennessee and Mississippi. This is clear evidence of a red state brain drain. In contrast, the areas with the highest percentage of college graduates are Washington D.C., Massachusetts and North Dakota, Michigan, New York, New Jersey and Maryland. Hey, what is North Dakota doing on that list?

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Companies Deserving of a Consumer Boycott” features these BP brands: ARAL, ARCO, Castrol, ampm and Wild Bean Cafe. Now get to it!

BREAKING NEWS: You didn’t think that the Blast-Off would miss an opportunity to comment on Sarah Palin and the “the girls”, did you? Why, how in the world could we fail to mention the brouhaha surrounding Sarah’s majestic Denali and Redoubt? But where in the world will Palin flee to seek medical attention if one of those peaks becomes active, springs a leak and erupts? Let’s answer that question with today’s song parody!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Volcano song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IjGHwGkFIFw&feature=related

VOLCANO

(sung to the Jimmy Buffett song “Volcano”)

(Chorus)
Now I don’t know
I don’t know
I don’t know where Sarah P. will go
When her volcano blow

Let me say now,

I don’t know
I don’t know
I don’t know where Sarah P. will go
When her volcano blow

She wanted her boobs to grow
So she spent a lot of dough
If the peak begins to quake
Sarah P. will leave the state

Let me hear ya now

I don’t know
I don’t know
I don’t know where Sarah P. will go
When her volcano blow

Now Sarah girl she said to T.
Take me to New York City
I’m not looking quite so hot
My silicone is down one quart

Let me say now, I don’t know
I don’t know
I don’t know where Sarah P. will go
When her volcano blow

Mr. Wooten!
(musical interlude)

Just what are those balloons worth?
Bigger than when she gave birth
What is next for Grizzly Mom?
She’s having work done on her bum

Now I don’t know
I don’t know
I don’t know where Sarah P. will go
When her volcano blow

One more now, I don’t know
(she don’t know)
I don’t know (she don’t know mon)
I don’t know where Sarah P. will go
When her volcano blow

She might want to land
In Rapid City
Might want to land
In Buffalo (ho ho ho)
Don’t want to land on no
Three mile Island
Don’t want to see her boobies glow (no no no)

Might want to land in
Indianapolis
Or in Nashville, Tennessee (ho ho ho)
Don’t want to land in
Massachusetts
Or in Putin’s territory (no no no)

Might want to land
In San Diego
Might want to land
In Miami (ho ho ho)
But the place that she wants so dearly
Is Ol’ Washington DC

I don’t know
I don’t know
I don’t know where Sarah P. will go
When her volcano blow

Just one more, I don’t know
(she don’t know)
I don’t know
(she don’t know, man)
I don’t know where Sarah gonna go
When her volcano blow!

Sunday Mid-Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 34

Just a few noteworthy news satellites that have been careening around the blogosphere this week. Sorry about the late start today folks as well as yesterday’s lack of a post. I’ll try to be more regular (so to speak).

BREAKING NEWS:  Rumor has it that when Sarah Palin took to the witness stand in Tennessee and was asked by the court clerk if “everything you say will be the truth; the whole truth and nothing but the truth; so help you God?”, the former ex-quitting Governor of Alaska replied, “Ya Betcha!”.

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of I Saw It On The Internet, So It Must Be True features Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele. Last week, a group of gay and lesbian members of the military chained themselves to the fence surrounding the White House as a means to protest the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy. However, when Steele walked by and noticed the shackled lesbians, he felt obligated to pay a cover charge and tip the girls.

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s episode of Legislate To Hate features Republican Arizona Governor Jan Brewer who signed a controversial racial profiling bill into law last week. The law requires that police stop and question drivers about their immigration status if they have a “reasonable belief” that their status is in question. In short, the newly created crime will be known as DWB (i.e. driving while brown).

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of Republicans Who Can’t Walk And Chew Gum At The Same Time features South Carolina Senator, Lindsey Graham. On Saturday he said Saturday he’s abandoning talks on climate change legislation because he believes Democratic efforts to bring up a separate immigration reform package is undermining the legislative process. In a letter that he released to the press, Graham said,

Moving forward on immigration – in this hurried, panicked manner – is nothing more than a cynical political ploy.

In response, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid said the Democratic Party remains committed to both issues and,

I appreciate the work of Senator Graham on both of these issues and understand the tremendous pressure he is under from members of his own party not to work with us on either measure, but I will not allow him to play one issue off of another, and neither will the American people. They expect us to do both, and they will not accept the notion that trying to act on one is an excuse for not acting on the other.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of Another Birther Bites The Dust features Army Lt. Col. Terrence Lakin who last month, released a YouTube video in which he explained that he would not report for a second tour in Afghanistan until President Obama proves he is a citizen. The Army did not take kindly to his stated intentions, so formal court martial charges have been brought against  Lakin, for failing to follow orders, the military said today. Will Lakin be fortunate enough to be Tea-Bagged while in a military brink? Don’t ask, don’t tell.

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of Republicans Behaving Badly features both racist Glenn Beck of Fox News and secessionist Governor Rick Perry of Texas. You might recall the time when Beck, while interviewing Perry, admitted that he would like to give him a French kiss. Well, it looks like Beck got his chance yesterday. Fox News host Glenn Beck  appeared with Texas Gov. Rick Perry, who is running on the Republican ticket for re-election at a Tea-Party style town hall meeting. Any Texas Rocketeers know if the kiss took place?

BREAKING NEWS: Remember back last October when we blogged that the The Clare Boothe Luce (whoever the hell she is) Policy Institute had released its fifth annual “Great American Conservative Women Calendar for 2010″? Besides the fact that the words, “Great American” and “Conservative Women” are mutually exclusive, who in the mad, mad, mad, mad, mad world of marketing ever could believe that such a thing could sell? Now we wonder, did they actually sell any of those calendars? Has anyone seen one?

Rather than list the names of the morons that will be featured in the calendar, we felt that we would simply incorporate them into tonight’s song parody. Please take note however, that even this conservative brain trust elected not to associate itself with Sarah Palin. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.  Please enjoy.

Remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the parody.

Calendar Girl song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qUlOyj9F5gM

CALENDAR GALS

(sung to the Neil Sedaka song “Calendar Girl”)

Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Right wing calendar gals
Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Preaching those politics of fear

(January) Who is Kate Obenshain?
(February) Some Claire Boothe Luce dame
(March) Ann Coulter has a mannish smile
(April) Michelle Malkin’s breath smells just like bile
Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl
Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

(May) Marji Ross has a gigantic bum
(June) Kelly-Anne Conway is so very dumb
(July) Michele Bachmann looks like a ‘ho
(August) Carrie Prejean must really need the dough
Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl
Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

(musical interlude)

Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl

Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

(September) Bay Buchanan’s age is sixty-three
(October) Phyllis Schlafly’s older than a redwood tree
(November) The Cupp chick goes by the name S.E.
(December) That Star Parker keeps strange company
Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl
Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Right wing calendar gals
Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Preaching those politics of fear

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 31

Just a few news bits that have been careening around the cosmos this past week.

BREAKING NEWS: Sarah Palin and the Tea-Baggers teamed up in Searchlight, Nevada yesterday to rally against the re-election efforts of Democratic Senator Harry Reid. For his part, Reid was nonplussed. He said he was “happy so many people came to see my hometown of Searchlight and spend their out-of-state money especially in these tough economic times. Ultimately, though, this election will be decided by Nevadans, not people from other states who parachute in for one day to have a tea party.”

THIS JUST IN: Speaking of Sarah Palin, the former ex-quitting Governor of Alaska is teaming up once again with John McCain. No, they have not announced that they will once again be running for the nation’s top office. This time Palin is campaigning for McCain in his bid for re-election to the Senate. This proves that John McCain is clinically insane. No sane person who was drowning would ask for someone to throw him an anchor.

BREAKING NEWS: TeaParty.org founder Dale Robertson brandished a sign with the (misspelled) word “niggar.” Listen, Tea-Baggers, if you insist upon being racists, at least be literate racists.

THIS JUST IN: What is it with Republicans and their obsession with having sex with animals? Sen. John McCain’s (R-Ariz.) primary challenger, former Arizona congressman J.D. Hayworth, warned this past weekend that the same-sex marriage decision handed down by the Massachusetts Supreme Court is so loose in its logic and wording that it could lead to a man marrying his horse.

BREAKING NEWS: A recent Harris Poll reveals that 14 percent of Americans say President Barack Obama may be the Antichrist. When split by political party, 24 percent of Republicans and 6 percent of Democrats viewed the nation’s leader in this way. Ok, I can understand the ignorant Republicans, but who are these 6 percent of Democrats?

THIS JUST IN: The Federal Elections Commission is investigating moonbat crazy Michele Bachmann yet again. How is it that this self described former “Tax Lawyer” cannot seem to add?

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “It’s About Time” features the mainstream media. This morning’s Boston Globe has finally printed an article which exposes the truth that Republicans want to hide. As we all know, since the passage of health care reform into law, every Republican has sought out the media outlet of his/her choice (generally Fox News) to rant about the unconstitutionality or outright illegality of the individual insurance mandate provision of the new law. The Globe reports the dirty secret however, that the G.O.P. was in favor of mandates before they were against them. Indeed, the whole idea of requiring individuals to purchase health insurance was floated by the uber-conservative Heritage Foundation in the 1990′s as a way to avoid a single payer system. The Globe also points out that two of the G.O.P.’s fiercest critics of the mandate, former Massachusetts Governor Mittwit Romney and recently elected nudist Senator Scott Brown, voted in favor of the mandate in MA and actually signed it into law back in 2006. The Boston Globe has revealed that the true basis for Republican opposition to health care reform is not the content of the law, but rather a blind obsession with opposing anything that the Obama administration hopes to accomplish regardless of merit. They have earned the moniker, “The Party of No”.

THIS JUST IN: Speaking of The Boston Globe and the clothing challenged Scott Brown, have you heard the latest? In an attempt to rake in dwindling out of state donations to his campaign coffer, Brown has recently shown up on many Fox News telecasts as well as on any nationally syndicated or local right wing radio programs to proclaim that he will be challenged in his re-election bid in 2012 by MSNBC host Rachel Maddow. This is news to Rachel Maddow. When she heard the rumor, she immediately declared on her television show that she would not be running for office. She also appeared as a guest on both Ed Schultz‘s radio and television programs to confirm the same. End to the rumor? Nope, Scott Brown continued to insist that Massachusetts resident Maddow would be the Democratic challenger to his seat. In an effort to quash the rumor and expose Brown’s lying ways, Maddow took out a full page ad in Friday’s edition of The Boston Globe. The ad ( a copy of which can be seen here) was a duplicate of the personal letter that she mailed to Brown. The citizens of Massachusetts are finally learning something about the dark side of the person that they just elected to fill Ted Kennedy’s Senate seat. Let’s hope they kick him out in 2012 regardless of the absence of Rachel Maddow.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of  “Alaskans, I Love You , But…” features the Boston College men’s hockey team. The Boston Globe reports this morning,

When it comes to the big stage, Boston College has a veteran presence. The Eagles brought their experience, talent, determination, and winning pedigree to the Northeast Regional semifinals at the DCU Center (in Worcester, MA) yesterday against an inexperienced Alaska-Fairbanks team that traveled more than 4,000 miles to compete in its first NCAA Tournament.

The Nanooks (18-12-9) showed remarkable poise and grit but the Eagles had more scoring touch and escaped with a 3-1 victory.

BC (26-10-3) improved to 11-0 all time in the first round of the NCAAs and will face Yale, a 3-2 winner over North Dakota.

As a tribute to the BC icemen, here are the Dropkick Murphy’s performing the Boston College fight song, “For Boston”.


Just a little Sarah Palin dittie to start your day. Remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along.

Born In The USA song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oVzHm_S0-A

BORN IN GOOD OLD AK

(sung to the Bruce Springsteen song, “Born In The U.S.A.”)

Born in an Idaho town
When my parents looked at me they could only frown
My dad he had a job that he sure did hate
So he loaded up the truck and we left the state

I wish I was…

(chorus)
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK

We moved to the town of Wasilla
A bland place sort of like vanilla
I became a man killer
A temperament like Godzilla

Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK

I was soon running for the VP
John McCain said I was so “mavericky”
He bought me shoes and a real fine dress
Then he kicked me off the “Straight Talk Express”

Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK

I went back to state 49
Acted as if the whole place was mine
I did bitch, I did whine
Committed more than one ethics crime
I did the acts but I won’t serve the time

Up on the North Slope where the oil does flow
I cut some deals oughta make me some dough
Then I think I’ll write a book
You can make a lot of dough when you’re a crook

Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
Born in good old AK
I’m a lipstick wearin’ pig in the U.S.A.
Born in good old AK
I’m a pocket hockey momma in the U.S.A.
Born in good old AK
(fading)

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 21

Just a few noteworthy news stories that have been careening around the stratosphere this week.

BREAKING NEWS: And now, for this weeks episode of Republican Hypocrites we have John Boehner (pronounced, boner) and Mitch McConnell. The two Republican leaders have taken a new tact in obstructing the Senate health care reform bill. They are publicly proclaiming that proposed amendments to the  bill are being negotiated by the Democratic majority “behind closed doors.” In an effort to nip that allegation in the bud, Democratic Senator Harry Reid immediately suggested that all proposed amendments to the bill be posted online for  public scrutiny. The Republican leadership of course, rejected the suggestion outright.

THIS JUST IN: The Harlem Gospel Choir has pulled a Sarah Palin and backed out of an appearance on Glenn Beck’s Christmas special at the last moment. Good for them. They were alerted to Beck’s overtly racist mindset by Color Of Change, the group which successfully orchestrated the Glenn Beck advertiser boycott. Nobody noticed the choir’s absence however, because Beck’s show was a bust. Only 17 tickets were sold in Boston and New York City. This highlights the point that Beck’s audience is a lot smaller than he thinks.

BREAKING NEWS: Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann’s constituents suffer from the highest percentage of home foreclosures in the state of Minnesota. Bachmann’s district had 1097 foreclosures in July, August and September 2009. Let’s hope that her homeless constituents are aware of the fact that Bachmann voted against every major piece of foreclosure-relief legislation brought before the House during her term in office.

THIS JUST IN: Former Fox News Watch host Eric Burns has some strong words regarding the Fox Network and Glenn Beck. He writes on the Huffington Post that he used to work for a “right-wing partial-news-but-mostly-opinion-network.” As for Glenn beck, he said,

I speak out now because it is the time of year when one is supposed to count blessings. I have several. Among them is that I do not have to face the ethical problem of sharing an employer with Glenn Beck.

Actually, Beck is a problem of taste as well as ethics. He laughs and cries; he pouts and giggles; he makes funny faces and grins like a cartoon character; he makes earnest faces yet insists he is a clown; he cavorts like a victim of St. Vitus’s Dance. His means of communicating are, in other words, so wide-ranging as to suggest derangement as much as versatility.

BREAKING NEWS: On Thursday, Senate Democrats voted to keep nearly $ 500 billion in Medicare cuts in their version of the health care reform bill. By a vote of 58 to 42 they rejected Republican Senator John McCain’s proposal to strip out the cuts. Isn’t it ironic that the political party that has opposed the Medicare program from its inception now portrays itself as its champion? The cuts to the program will not limit medical services to recipients nor increase co-pays and the cuts are supported by AARP.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of Foolish Republican Tricks that Backfired features Senators David “Diaper Wearing” Vitter and Tom Coburn. The two tricky Republicans filed an amendment to the health care reform bill which would require that all members of Congress enroll in the “public option.” They believed that no self respecting legislator would ever submit his own health care to such a lousy plan. Problem is, Democrats Sherrod Brown, Al Franken, Barbara Mikulski and Chris Dodd have all agreed not only to enroll in the public option but also to co-sponsor the amendment with the two Republicans. Once their bluff was called, the cowardly Republicans retracted the amendment.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of Blue-Dog Democrats Behaving Badly features Senator Max Baucus of Montana. Baucus is best known as the jerk who did whatever he could to prevent a public option from appearing in the Senate version of the health care reform bill. We learned this week that Baucus has also sided with the Republicans in their favorite pastime, adultery. Baucus has now admitted that he was carrying on an affair with his state office director, at the same time that he nominated her to be U.S. Attorney in Montana. He may as well just switch party affiliation at this point.

THIS JUST IN: In this week’s episode of Indefensible Republican Votes we have the 30 Republican Senators that voted against an amendment to a defense spending bill that would withhold government contracts from companies that refused to let employee rape victims bring the rape cases before courts of law. ‘Nuff said.

Remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along to today’s song parody.

Every Kind Of People song link: http://www.ilike.com/artist/Robert+Palmer/track/Every+Kinda+People

EVERY KIND OF PEOPLE

(sung to the Robert Palmer version of the song “Every Kind Of People”)

The far right always competes
They all lie and then misspeak
Try to keep their jobs
Fighting to land a spot on Fox

It takes every kind of people
To make that right wing sound
Every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout

We’re not sure Glenn Beck can read
Is Ann Coulter a he or is it a she?
O’Reilly seems so damn uptight
Limbaugh cannot keep a wife

Though they profit by deceit
Honest men know that
Fox will suffer defeat
If you’re anything but white
Fox News will insult you with delight

It takes every kind of people
To make that right wing sound
Every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout

(musical interlude)

You know that hate’s their only goal
They learned that long ago from Bob Dole
Hey, and they are all insane
Looking to always pass the blame

It takes every kind of people
To make that right wing sound
It takes every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout

Every kind of people
To vainly scream and shout
It takes very kind of people




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