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Haiti Braces For Disaster: (Sarah Palin To Visit)

Santa Palin leads Haitian children in a "pageant walk"

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Haiti is an island nation in peril. First there was the devastating earthquake. Next came the disastrous hurricane That was followed by a massive cholera epidemic. And now, this weekend Sarah Palin will come stomping in like some hell-bent infrastructure destroying Godzilla. Well, that certainly is a lot more than most third world countries could cope with. Lets hope the Haitians are up to the task of entertaining the “Alaska Disaster” even as they try to merely survive the deplorable conditions in which they exist.

In a blatant example of political posturing, Sarah Palin is headed this weekend to Haiti with the evangelist Franklin Graham.The trip was announced by Samaritan’s Purse, Mr. Graham’s international relief organization. Graham said,

“I am pleased that Governor Palin will accompany us on a brief trip to Haiti this weekend and I appreciate her willingness to visit Haiti during such troubled times. I don’t know of any people in recent years who have suffered more, and in such a short period of time, than the people of this small country — with an earthquake, a hurricane and now a cholera epidemic.”

Palin has not commented on the trip either by Facebook or Twitter as of yet, but stay tuned. There is absolutely no way that the “Queen of Quit” will not try to embellish her world affairs bona fides by broadcasting to the world that she will single-handedly save the Haitians by warning them about government “death panels” and extolling the benefits of oil drilling. In fact, rumor has it that she will also hold a fee-based book signing event at the ruined rubble that was once Haiti’s only Borders Books. Palin would also like a head to head meeting with the King of Haiti to discuss the issue of gays in the military.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s Holiday Season inspired song parody.

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPAOBN4Pt-Y

HAVE YOURSELF A SARAH PALIN CHRISTMAS

(sung to the Christmas song “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas”)

Sarah Palin is far away
She’s out making some cash
This is Sarah Palin’s pay day
Just how long will it last?

Have yourself a Sarah Palin Christmas
Wink and blink your eyes
Leave the bus
And fly your jet up in the skies

Have yourself a Sarah Palin Christmas
Sign books to get paid
Take that dough
From people that you have betrayed

These are not like the olden days
These are golden days for sure
You don’t have to travel by bus
On your marvelous book tour

Come next year
Things will be even better
You’re the cat’s meow
You’ll still have the SarahPAC as your cash cow
So have yourself a Sarah Palin Christmas now

(These are not like the olden days)
(These are golden days for sure)
You don’t have to travel by bus
On your marvelous book tour

Come next year
Things will be even better
You’re the cat’s meow
You’ll still have the SarahPAC as your cash cow
So have yourself a Sarah Palin Christmas now

Fox Walks While Television Rocks

Fox News has a new slogan. It is “Heartless and Callous”. Is there any other way to describe the network’s dearth of coverage of the Haitian earthquake and its devastating aftermath? In short, one of the poorest nations on earth was struck by one of the worst natural disasters in recent history, resulting in a present death toll in excess of 100,000.00 and growing, coupled with one third of the nation’s population clinging to life and Fox News has remained largely silent. When compared to nearly every other network’s time allotted to coverage of the tragedy, Fox News consistently devoted less time to coverage.

The Fox News network’s indifference to the Haitian tragedy was never more conspicuous than on last Friday night. The cable news channel refused to air Hope For Haiti Now: A Global Benefit For Earthquake Relief. Instead, it broadcast its regular lineup of The O’Reilly Factor and Hannity. To add insult to injury, neither of those programs even devoted a segment to the Haitian disaster. Instead, Bill O’Reilly had segments on Sarah Palin’s body language while on Oprah, an interview with Glenn Beck about Glenn Beck and a segment on the deterioration of “far left media”. Sean Hannity’s program consisted of an interview with Karl Rove, Obama’s approval ratings with regard to health care reform and coverage of newly elected senator Scott Brown.

Hope For Haiti Now: A Global Benefit For Earthquake Relief was a telethon which was broadcast worldwide to raise funds for Haitian victims through organizations including Oxfam America, Partners In health, UNICEF, the Red Cross, United Nations World Food Programme, Yele Haiti Foundation and the Clinton Bush Haiti Foundation. There were  segments by George Clooney, Reese Witherspoon, Jennifer Aniston, Julia Roberts and Halle Berry. There were performances by Bruce Springsteen, Alicia Keys, John Legend, Kid Rock, Keith Urban, Sheryl Crow, Beyonce´, Madonna and U2’s Bono and The Edge.

The telethon was broadcast by the following media outlets:

MTV, ET, CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS, NBC, Fox, CNN, BET, The CW, HBO, MTV, VH1, CMT, PBS, TNT, Showtime, Comedy Central, Bravo, E! Entertainment, National Geographic Channel, Oxygen, G4, CENTRIC, Current TV, Fuse, MLB Network, EPIX, Palladia, SoapNet, Style, Discovery Health, Planet Green, CNN en Español, HBO Latino and Canadian networks, including CBC Television, CTV, Global Television and MuchMusic. The event will be live streamed online globally across sites including YouTube, Hulu, MySpace, Fancast, AOL, MSN.com, Yahoo, Bing.com, BET.com, CNN.com, MTV.com, VH1.com and Rhapsody, and on mobile via Alltel, AT&T, Sprint, Verizon and FloTV. “Hope for Haiti Now” will also air internationally on BET International, CNN International and national geographic.

Fox News‘ conspicuous absence from this lineup is indicative of its indifference to those in need and its single minded purpose of promoting an agenda solely dedicated to furthering the policies of the selfish far right. perhaps the network’s new slogan should be, “Fox News: Fairly Unbalanced”.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Let Em In song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xe990JYsbNo&feature=related

LET FOX IN

(sung to the Paul McCartney and Wings song “Let ‘Em In”)

Someone’s sniveling on the tube
Somebody’s startin’ to yell
Someone’s sportin’ new boobs
Somebody reeks of hair gel

Do me a favor,
Change the channel and let Fox in
Ooh yeah

Someone’s not “fair and balanced”
Somebody’s missing brain cells
Someone’s psyche is imbalanced
Somebody’s wearing pastels

Do me a favor,
Change the channel and let Fox in
Yeah ,yeah, yeah, let Fox in

Neil Cavuto, O’Reilly
Glenn Beck and Hannity
Huckabee and Sarah Palin
Change the channel and let Fox in
Yeah

(musical interlude)

Neil Cavuto, O’Reilly
Glenn Beck and Hannity
Huckabee and Van Susteren
Change the channel and let Fox in
Oh,yeah

Someone’s talking to Newt Gingrich
Somebody’s starting to shout
Someone called Hillary a bitch
Somebody’s starting to pout

Do me a favor,
Change the channel and let Fox in
Ooh yeah ,yeah, let Fox in, let ‘em in now

Doo doo doo doo da doo doo
Doo doo doo da doo da

Neil Cavuto, O’Reilly
Glenn Beck and Hannity
Huckabee and Sarah Palin
Change the channel and let Fox in
Oh,yeah

Someone’s sniveling on the tube
Somebody’s startin’ to yell
Someone’s sportin’ new boobs
Somebody reeks of hair gel

Do me a favor,
Change the channel and let Fox in
Ooh yeah , yeah , yeah ,yeah ,yeah

Here’s To You, Mr. Robertson!

There is a special place in Hell reserved for Pat Robertson. If you do not believe that, simply take a closer look at some of his vile quotes above. Those statements alone reveal this alleged “Man of God” to be a misogynistic, gay hating, racist, murder plotting  sorry excuse for a human being. And that is being kind.

He added to his hit-list of hate filled quotes this week while commenting upon the recent Haitian earthquake which killed thousands and left millions more clinging to existence. Did he offer sympathy? Did he offer prayer? No, he laid blame for the natural disaster on the victims thereof. He said they deserved what they got because their forefathers had made a pact with the Devil. Here are his words:

Something happened a long time ago in Haiti, and people might not want to talk about it. They were under the heel of the French … and they got together and swore a pact to the devil. They said, ‘We will serve you if you’ll get us free from the French’. True story. And so the devil said, ‘OK, it’s a deal.’ They kicked the French out. The Haitians revolted and got themselves free. Ever since, they have been cursed by one thing after the other. [Haitians] need to have a great turning to God, and out of this tragedy, I’m optimistic something good may come,

Nothing more need be said about the very reverend Pat Robertson, except maybe today’s very topical song parody. Please enjoy.

Remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

Mrs. Robinson song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvlTn5xnozE

MR. ROBERTSON

(sung to the Simon and Garfunkel song “Mrs. Robinson”)

And here’s to you, dear Pat Robertson
Jesus loathes you more than you will know (Wo, wo, wo)
You’re a disease, Mr. Robertson
You are a disgrace to those who pray
(Hey, hey, hey…hey, hey, hey)

The things you said of Haitians expose you as someone vile
You need some help to learn to help yourself
How do you believe you’ll fare when you’re before God’s eyes?
I think Satan’s hounds,  will make you feel at home

And here’s to you, dear Pat Robertson
Jesus loathes you more than you will know (Wo, wo, wo)
Down on your knees, Mr. Robertson
Beg forgiveness for the things you say
(Hey, hey, hey…hey, hey, hey)

You are in a deep dark place where only sinners go
Blaming all those victims for their heartaches
Please keep your intolerance out of their sad affairs
Most of all, don’t pin the blame on those poor kids

Here’s shame on you, Mr. Robertson
Jesus loathes you more than you will know (Wo, wo, wo)
And won’t you please, Mr. Robertson
Take your hate and quickly fade away?
(Hey, hey, hey…hey, hey, hey)

You’re a preaching joker every Sunday afternoon
Blaming the Haitians for the earthquake
And there is no doubt about it
You don’t have a clue
Ev’ry way I look at it, you lose

Your mind has gone and now you should go
Our nation does not need a jerk like you (Woo, woo, woo)
What’s that you say, Mr. Robertson?
Fox News tells you what they want you to say?
(Hey, hey, hey…hey, hey, hey)