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Glenn Beck: Tears of A Rodeo Clown

Yes, that is the proverbial “Fat Lady” who you can hear singing. The show is now officially over. That’s right, we are finally rid of the hate-speak and misinformation-spewing Glenn Beck. Even the Republican propaganda arm known as Fox News finally realized that steadily declining ratings and the continued loss of millions of dollars in free market advertising dictated a divorce between the network and the crazy-man. In the end, even Fox News president Roger Ailes had his limits when it comes to a lost cause.

The break-up came after months of infighting between Beck and the network. The straw that broke the camel’s back however, was the fact that virtually all of the program’s sponsors fled along with their advertising revenue and Beck’s ratings have plummeted by approximately 40%. What show could withstand that type of double-whammy?

During its run, Beck’s show focused primarily on criticizing President Barack Obama. It is interesting to note that the program debuted on Fox News the day before President Obama took office It is also ironic to note that Obama will retain his position at the very least through 2012 while Beck will be long gone from Fox. That alone shows that Beck’s program was a massive “Mission Unaccomplished”. In fact, Glenn Beck’s steady fall from grace began in 2009 when he proclaimed that President Barack Obama has a “deep-seated hatred for white people”. That remark caused such a public backlash that over 300 advertisers pulled their commercials from his program.

Soon thereafter, Beck, the self-described rodeo clown, began to describe wacky conspiracies involving socialists, communists, leftists and Muslims all joining forces to infiltrate the Obama administration and then take down the world. Honestly, even Austin Powers’ arch enemy, the sinister Dr. Evil, could not come up with something that devilish. It appeared that he was having a mental breakdown on a nightly basis before our very eyes. He was reduced to tears more often than John Boehner. His television stage-set resembled the hidden-away attic classroom of an addle-minded professor who has been reduced to spewing unintelligible gibberish and writing inane code on a blackboard in a near empty classroom. His conspiracy theories were so wildly imaginative and unrealistic that even the other Fox hosts such as Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity steered well clear of all things Beckian. Simply stated, Glenn Beck had become a raving lunatic and a liability to Fox News.

Fox executives should have realized that Beck spelled trouble from the very beginning. He has no formal education or work experience in the world of politics. Glenn Beck’s college career consisted of ONE COURSE, not one semester mind you, but one course. His radio background consisted of merely a bunch of shock-jock jobs with a number of different stations. Add to that his history of alcohol and drug abuse, and you have a recipe for some kind of on-air nervous breakdown. That is exactly what we and Beck’s bosses seem to have been witnessing.

Don’t believe me? Watch this:

Need more evidence? let’s watch a few more of Beck highlights as well as his final exit:

That my friends is a caseload of canned-crazy. But now it is time to celebrate. This weekend we should celebrate not only the holiday which commemorates our great nation’s independence, but also the final departure of one of our great nation’s craziest wackos from the free public airwaves.

Lynnrockets wishes all of you and your’s a happy, healthy 4th of July Weekend!!!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Tears Of A Clown song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zww7FQILQec

TEARS OF A RODEO CLOWN

 (sung to the Smokey Robinson song “Tears of A Clown”)

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah

Now Fox wiped that smile from Beck’s face
Was only there trying to fool the public
And Glenn was a drug-abusing fool
And honey, since now we’re on the subject
Don’t you let Beck’s sad expression
Lead to misplaced adulation
Really Beck’s mad, and he’s sadder than sad
Beck’s gone and he’s hurtin’ so bad
Like a clown Beck pretends to be glad

Now there’s some mad things ‘bout this man
But ain’t too much sadder than
The tears of this clown, as Beck stumbles around
Uh hum, oh yeah Becky

Now if it appears Fox set him free
It’s only to minimize the badness
They want to conceal that wild-eyed guy
His sponsors all fled due to Beck’s madness
Fox won’t let his show continue
Beck has too many issues
He just had to go, along with his show
Glenn’s hurt and it really does show
That dumb Glenn Beck has lost his mojo, ooh yeah

Now there’s some mad things ‘bout this man
But ain’t too much sadder than
The tears of this clown, as Beck stumbles around
Oh yeah

Just like Liberace did
Glenn Beck lost it and flipped his lid
Telling conspiracy lies
Moisture filling his jaundiced eyes
The tears of a clown
And his faked sobbing sound, oh yeah baby

Yes, Fox wiped that smile from Beck’s face
Look at Ailes’ glad expression
He taught Glenn Beck a lesson
Don’t let the smile Beck wears
Make you think that he don’t care
Cuz really he’s sad…Beck’s hurting so bad…

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Beck Bounced By Beleaguered Boss

Last month’s New York Times report that moonbat-crazy Glenn Beck may be told to pack up his things and leave Fox News-Ville in December when his contract with the network expires has proven to be true. Fox News announced on Wednesday that Glenn Beck’s nightly Teapublican propaganda show will be terminated before year’s end. The break-up allegedly came after months of infighting between Beck and the network. The straw that broke the camel’s back however, was most likely the fact that virtually all of the program’s sponsors fled along with their advertising revenue and Beck’s ratings have plummeted by approximately 40%. What show could withstand that type of double-whammy?

During its run, Beck’s show focused primarily on criticizing President Barack Obama. It is interesting to note that the program debuted on Fox News the day before President Obama took office It is also ironic to note that Obama will retain his position at the very least through 2012 while Beck will be long gone from Fox. That alone shows that Beck’s program was a massive “Mission Unaccomplished”. In fact, Glenn Beck’s steady fall from grace began in 2009 when he proclaimed that President Barack Obama has a “deep-seated hatred for white people”. That remark caused such a public backlash that over 300 advertisers pulled their commercials from his program.

Soon thereafter, Beck began to describe wacky conspiracies involving socialists, communists, leftists and Muslims all joining forces to infiltrate the Obama administration and then take down the world. Honestly, even Austin Powers’ arch enemy, the sinister Dr. Evil, could not come up with something that devilish. It appeared that he was having a mental breakdown on a nightly basis before our very eyes. He was reduced to tears more often than John Boehner. His television stage-set resembled the hidden-away attic classroom of an addle-minded tenured professor who has been reduced to spewing unintelligible gibberish and writing inane code on a blackboard in front of which there are no longer any sane students. His conspiracy theories were so wildly imaginative and unrealistic that even the other Fox hosts such as Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity steered well clear of all things Beckian. Simply stated, Glenn Beck had become a raving lunatic and a liability to Fox News.

Fox executives should have realized that Beck spelled trouble from the very beginning. He has no formal education or work experience in the world of politics. Glenn Beck’s college career consisted of ONE COURSE, not one semester mind you, but one course. His radio background consisted of merely a bunch of shock-jock jobs with a number of different stations. Add to that his history of alcohol and drug abuse, and you have a recipe for some kind of on-air nervous breakdown. That is exactly what we and Beck’s bosses seem to have been witnessing of late.

Don’t believe me? Watch this:

Beck delivered his own on-air epithet Wednesday night. It was a strange and rambling diatribe in which he compared himself to Paul Revere and quoted “Macbeth”. He said,

“When I took this job I didn’t take it because it was going to be a career for me. Paul Revere did not get up on the horse and say, ‘I’m going to do this for the rest of my life.  He didn’t do it. He got off the horse at some point and fought in the revolution, and then he went back to silversmithing.”

He then went on to say,

“If I could prove my case that something wicked this way was coming, something in America was wrong, America would listen, and they have. I will continue to tell the story. Stick together. I’m going to be showing you other ways for us to connect. But I have other things to do.”

Thankfully for most sane Americans, Glenn Beck will not be showing us things and doing things on one of the largest cable networks in the nation for much longer. Ah Glenn, we hardly knew ye!

Please take at a look at my WRKO Boston talk radio-based blog also, too. It can be found here: Kevin’s Blog-A Liberal Dose of Reality.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Last Train To Clarksville song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1KSHyXGy6XA

LAST TRAIN TO NUTSVILLE

(sung to the Monkees song “Last Train To Clarksville”)

Take the last train to Nutsville
Beck will meet you at the station
You can be there by four-thirty
Cuz Fox made your reservation
The Beck Show, oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no!

Glenn lost his mind without warning
And it won’t be back again
Glenn Beck’s facing stormy weather
And it’s causing quite a strain
So, he must go, oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no

He might have a lobotomy on his dome.

Take the last train to Nutsville
Glenn Beck is their famous patient
If he’s not crying he’ll blow some kisses
But don’t attempt conversation
Oh… oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no!

(conspiracy theory break)

Take the last train to Nutsville
That’s where Glenn Beck now calls home
We can’t hear him making noisy
Conversation all alone
He’s feelin’ low. Oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no!

And I don’t think that Glenn finds another home.

(break with reality)

Take the last train to Nutsville
Beck will meet you at the station
He will look ragged and dirty
And in need of medication
Beck must go, oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no!

And I don’t think that Glenn finds another home.

Take the last train to Nutsville
Take the last train to Nutsville
(repeat and fade)

Murdoch Tells Beck To Get The Fox Outta Here

The New York Times reports that moonbat-crazy Glenn Beck may be told to pack up his things and leave Fox News-Ville in December when his contract with the propaganda network expires.

Beck has lost more than a third of his audience since last August and it is easy to see why. He is having a mental breakdown on a nightly basis before our very eyes. His television stage-set resembles the hidden away attic classroom of an addle-minded tenured professor who has been reduced to spewing unintelligible gibberish and writing inane code on a blackboard in front of which there are no longer any sane students. His conspiracy theories are so wildly imaginative and unrealistic that even the other Fox hosts such as Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity steer well clear of all things Beckian. Simply stated, Glenn beck has become a raving lunatic and a liability to Fox News.

Glenn Beck’s steady fall from grace began in 2009 when he proclaimed that President Barack Obama has a “deep-seated hatred for white people”. That remark caused such a public backlash that that over 300 advertisers pulled their commercials from his program. Virtually his only remaining sponsors are gold-hawking economic doomsayers. The resultant startling loss of advertising revenue was not something the Fox network enjoyed. Soon thereafter, Beck began to describe wacky conspiracies involving socialists, communists, leftists and Muslims all joining forces to infiltrate the Obama administration and then take down the world. Honestly, even Austin Powers’ arch enemy, the sinister Dr. Evil, could not come up with something that devilish.

Fox executives should have realized that Beck spelled trouble from the very beginning. He has no formal education or work experience in the world of politics. Glenn Beck’s college career consisted of ONE COURSE, not one semester mind you, but one course. His radio background consisted of merely a bunch of shock-jock jobs with a number of different stations. Add to that his history of alcohol and drug abuse, and you have a recipe for some kind of on-air nervous breakdown. That is exactly what we and Beck’s bosses are witnessing at the moment. It is obvious that the network wants to rid itself of Beck’s huge salary and distance itself from his meltdown as soon as possible. For Fox News, December 2011 cannot come soon enough.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Always On My Mind” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s-Xl17B-Z0A

GLENN BECK’S SIMPLY LOST HIS MIND

(sung to the Willie Nelson song “You Were Always On My Mind”)

Glennie, we didn’t love you
Quite as often as we could have
Still, our goal is to defeat you
Cut your audience in half

Limbaugh makes you feel second best
It is him you are behind
Glenn, you’ve simply lost your mind
Glenn, you’ve simply lost your mind

And maybe Fox should’ve told you
Your show is a waste of time
All those folks that you sell gold to
Would do best to keep their dimes

Crazy things that you have said and done
Show a brain that’s in decline
Glenn, you’ve simply lost your mind
Glenn, you’ve simply lost your mind

Glenn B.
Tell us some more big outrageous lies
Silly
Silly conspiracies made-up in your mind
You should be tranquilized

(crying break)

Crazy things that you have said and done
Show a brain that’s in decline
Beck has simply lost his mind
Beck has simply lost his mind
Beck has simply lost his mind
Beck has simply lost his mind