Category Archives: Town Hall Protest Tour

Beck Being Buried By Bolting Believers?

The first fallout from Glenn Beck’s public descent into televised insanity was the massive advertiser boycott of his show when he called President Obama a “racist” with a “deep seated hatred of white people”. That remark caused at least 62 businesses to pull advertising and it cost Fox News millions of dollars. It also cost him just about every audience member that was a person of color. Next, the unhinged entertainer lost every single one of the advertisers on his United Kingdom broadcasts. That was followed by a Christian boycott of Beck as a consequence of his urging audience members to leave their churches if they promote “social justice”. Beck told them that the term “social justice” was simply a code word which indicates that their church supports socialism or communism or Nazism. Beck’s words? “Now, am I advising people to leave their church? Yes!”

With the loss of church goers to go along with the loss of people of color and mainstream sponsors, Beck was left only with an audience of flash in the pan fanatical Tea-Baggers. He held onto those spelling challenged, violence inciting crackpots by constantly promoting their cause and by posing as their political science professor. On a nightly basis Beck would lecture to them about the dangers posed by all the socialists, communists and Nazis within the Obama administration. In an attempt to appear professorial and to make the Tea-Baggers feel at home, Beck used a chalkboard upon which he often misspelled words.

But then something strange suddenly happened on the way to the Neilsens. Now even the Tea-Baggers are abandoning Beck’s comedy show. His viewership ratings have been dropping since the beginning of 2010. By last Friday, Beck’s television show hit an all-time low with only 1.7 million viewers. That is a drop of over 50% from his peak of 3.4 million viewers back in late 2009. Beck’s average number of viewers is now only 2 million which is a solid 1 million daily viewers less than last year.

This begs the question, how long will Fox endure a show that brings in virtually zero advertising revenue while losing at least 1 million viewers per day? Will Glenn Beck’s darling free market capitalism actually be the cause of his ultimate demise? Let’s hope so.

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along to the parody. Have fun, fellow Rocketeers.

Desperado song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b8vtYBbhINM

Desperado

(sung to the Eagles song “Desperado”)

Desperado, you better come to your senses
Your racist offenses, so public now
Oh, you’re a hard one
But this will be your last season
The Fox boys are teasin’ you
Your show’s all done now

After your unseemly cryin’, boy
We knew you were unstable
We have all seen you fall apart on your set

Now it seems to me, you don’t bring
One sane sentence to the table
But what could one expect from crazy Glenn Beck

Desperado, you better fetch that old plunger
You’ll soon be flushed under that porcelain throne
Your kingdom, your kingdom fell and it’s not all that shocking
You just kept on talking till you were all alone

Will your deep dark soul hibernate in slime?
Your name, Glenn Beck, constitutes a crime
As does most everything that you say
Your sponsors all fleeing your show
Ain’t it funny as we watch them go away?

Desperado, You’ve shown us all what nonsense is
The prevailing sense is, you only hate
Your tears are rainin’, cuz you know nobody loves you
The Lord in Heaven up above you
(heaven up above you)
The Lord in Heaven up above you will decide your fate

Hey Tea-Baggers, Don’t Eat The Brown Acid!

Any day that you can repeat the famous “Don’t Eat The Brown Acid” line from the 1968 Woodstock festival is a good day for Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off. Today, we can thank the Tea Party and its membership of Tea-Baggers for the opportunity. Unfortunately, the warning may be too late. It appears that they have been tripping on something bad for the last eighteen months since their manufactured creation. Oh, and “what a long, strange trip it’s been”!

The Des Moines Register (Iowa) reported this week that,

An event described as the “Woodstock” of tea parties is planned for Sept. 11 at the Monona County Fairgrounds in Onawa in western Iowa. Craig Halverson of Griswold, who is helping to organize the event, said supporters hope to attract at least 1,000 people from Iowa, Nebraska, South Dakota, Minnesota and other states. He said they are inviting prominent conservative speakers and plan to have bands perform patriotic music.


The event will have a “Take back our country” theme, Halverson said. Although the activities will occur on the ninth anniversary of the Sept. 11, 2001, terrorist attacks on New York and Washington, he said organizers don’t plan to spend the day reflecting on those events.

The whole idea of a group of socially awkward, old, white, conservative men gathering together is far more reminiscent of the early bird dinner hour at an AARP convention than the wildly famous counter-cultural youth phenomena which was Woodstock. The fact that the organizer only expects a group of “at least 1000 people” underscores the insignificance of the event. To add insult to injury, the gathering is scheduled to take place on September 11th. That tragic day will be remembered by all Americans and the horrible events that took place had absolutely nothing to do with taxes, bailouts, health care reform or anything else having to do with “taking back our country”. The Tea-Baggers should be ashamed of themselves for trying to capitalize on that day of tragedy.

Then again, what could we expect? The Tea-Baggers have been tripping on some sort of hallucinogen since their creation which has blurred and warped their perception of historical events. They have stripped founding father Thomas Jefferson from the history books. They think it is patriotic for their states to secede from the union. They deny that Medicare was created as and continues to be, a government program. Consequently, is it that much of a stretch for them to believe that September 11th was the day when taxes or bailouts went out of control? The Tea-Baggers are certainly suffering from a bad trip. Heck, their de-facto Queen, Sarah Palin named her oldest son Track after the marks left behind from intrvenous drug use and her grandchild (?) is named  Tripp. How appropriate.

At least the event will allow the rest of us to laugh our collective asses off at all of the Tea-Baggers’ now famous misspelled signs.


Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Magical Mystery Tour song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hnrsqf33MXA

THE TRAGICAL MISERY TOUR

(sung to The Beatles song “Magical Mystery Tour”)

Roll up, roll up for the tragical misery tour. Step right this way.

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up AND THAT’S AN INVITATION, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, DON’T NEED NO EDUCATION, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour is eating your brain cells away
Eating your brain cells away

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, WE DON’T CARE IF YOU CAN’T READ, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, SO LONG AS YOU CAN SCREAM, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour will even pay you for the day
Even pay you for the day

(The misery trip is waiting)

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, TO MAKE A RESERVATION, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, FOR INSANE CONVERSATION, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour wants insurers to keep their payday
Please help them to have their way
The tragical misery tour is hoping that you die away
After you make your co-pay, make your co-pay

His Irish Eyes Are Now Smiling

Ted Kennedy's dream has been realized with the passage of Health Care Reform

America wins! Last night’s historic passage of health care reform legislation was the largest social program to become law in the last forty years. Many of the health insurance industry’s greatest anti-consumer transgressions will now be curtailed. The pre-existing condition disqualification? Gone! The cap on benefits to premium paying consumers? Gone! The Medicare doughnut hole? Gone! Although the bill was not as comprehensive as most of us would have liked, it is nonetheless, a giant step toward  the ultimate goal of a single payer program. Furthermore, the Republicans have nothing to complain about. After all, wasn’t it their idea that health care reform legislation proceed incrementally? Well, we are now proceeding incrementally towards a public option and then single payer.

It is a bit sad that Ted Kennedy, the longtime champion of health care reform, did not live long enough to savor his victory. We can all be sure however, that wherever he may be, he is smiling and content. His dream has been realized. For those of us from Massachusetts, today is a day when we have exacted a little revenge against the Tea-Baggers and their centerfold child Scott Brown. When the Tea Party’s out of state money helped the nudist Republican capture Ted Kennedy’s vacant senate seat, he gloated that he would “not be the 60th vote for health care reform”, but “the 41st vote” against its passage. Unfortunately for Brown and the Tea-Baggers, his election galvanized the Democrats and he never even had an opportunity to cast a vote on the subject. In short, Brown had no effect and his election was a wake up call to the Democrats to fight even harder. As George W. Bush would say, “You’ve done a heck of a job, Brownie!”

The next interesting step will be the vote on the reconciliation package that will take place in the Senate this week. The reconciliation bill removes much of the pork that was included in the original Senate bill. Senate President Harry Reid has assured members of the House and the American people that he has the fifty votes (Vice President Joe Biden being the 51st) necessary to pass the reconciliation. Indeed, he can lose up to nine Democratic votes from the original bill and still succeed. The clothing challenged Scott Brown’s 41st vote will once again be of no consequence.

It should be particularly amusing to watch how the Republican senators vote on the reconciliation bill that will remove pork. If Republicans oppose reconciliation, the Democrats can campaign against them on the issue of their support for pork. If Republicans vote in favor of reconciliation so as to remove the pork, Democrats can campaign on the issue that Republicans ignored their base by means of voting in favor of health care reform. Oh, what a wicked web has been weaved! Can Tea-Baggers spell “dilemma”? Who cares? That is their problem.

Today, we can celebrate!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Good Day Sunshine song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qelpxf2cGu8

GOOD DAY HEALTH CARE

(sung to the Beatles song “Good Day Sunshine”)

Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare

It’s fun to laugh when Republicans pout
We’ve got something we can laugh about
We feel good, in a special way
Health care’s here and now we’ve had our way

Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare

Go take a walk, you nudist Scottie Brown
Obstruction has been shot right down

Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare

Palin lied, and got caught didn’t she?
Death Panels were a fallacy
It feels good to watch Beck cry and whine
Let’s watch his ratings as they decline

Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare
Good day healthcare

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 22

We’re Baaaaaaaaaaack. Just of few noteworthy news bits and comments thereon from this past week.

BREAKING NEWS: The U.S. Senate passed its version of a health care reform bill on Christmas Eve and this is how a typically irrational Tea-Bagger responds:

‘Nuff said.

THIS JUST IN: Moonbat Minnesotan Michele Bachmann has been exposed once again. No, not pictorially thank goodness. The uber-conservative socialism hating Republican Senator that rails against all forms of health care reform and foreclosure mitigation which might impede upon the perfection of the free market has been caught with her hand in the socialist cookie jar. TruthDig.com reports that Ms. Bachmann’s family farm has collected over $ 251,973.00 in socialized government farm subsidies since 1995. Just another example of a Republican imploring citizens to “do as I say, not as I do”.

BREAKING NEWS: In this week’s edition of “I Don’t Know What The F_ _ _ I’m Talking About”, we also feature Michele Bachmann. At a Tea-Bagger rally in Washington D.C. last week, the historically challenged Republican Senator, in an attempt to whip up the crowd, compared the Tea-Bagger movement to “The Charge of the Light Brigade”. Bachmann was apparently unaware that “The Charge of the Light Brigade” was a poem written by Lord Tennyson to commemorate a moment in the 1854 Crimean War, when British officers misdirected more than 600 troops into an area known as the Valley of Death to face 25,000 Russians. There were hundreds of casualties, the British officers were disgraced, and the Russians won the day. Like Sarah Palin, did Bachmann also attend the University of Idaho?

THIS JUST IN: Media Matters For America has just awarded Fox News host Glenn Beck its “Misinformer Of The Year Award”.

When he wasn’t calling the president a racist, portraying progressive leaders as vampires who can only be stopped by “driv[ing] a stake through the heart of the bloodsuckers,” or pushing the legitimacy of seceding from the country, Beck obsessively compared Democrats in Washington to Nazis and fascists and “the early days of Adolf Hitler.” He wondered, “Is this where we’re headed,” while showing images of Hitler, Stalin, and Lenin; decoded the secret language of Marxists; and compared the government to “heroin pushers” who were “using smiley-faced fascism to grow the nanny state.”


BREAKING NEWS: In response to PolitiFact.com deeming her “death panels” comment to be the biggest lie of 2009, Sarah Palin has scoffingly posted on Facebook against “Nancy Pelosi and friends who have tried to call ‘death panels’ the ‘lie of the year.’ “. Can this former ex-quitting governor of Alaska ever get her facts straight? If she is going to counter that one of her comments has been awarded the dubious distinction of being “the biggest lie of 2009″, shouldn’t she be aware that it was PolitiFact.com that bestowed the award and not Nancy Pelosi? What a maroon!

THIS JUST IN: A CNN/Opinion Research Corporation survey released last Wednesday indicates that a  majority of Americans, 51 percent, believe that the Democrats’ policies are good for the country. By contrast, 53 percent of people questioned in the poll say that the GOP’s polices would move the nation in the wrong direction. It is obvious that the Tea-Baggers are not as voluminous as they want everyone to think, nor are they very influential.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “The Numbers Don’t Lie Like Sarah Palin” features the obstructionist Republican Party. We now have proof-positive that the G.O.P. is the “Party of No”. People For The American Way reports:

So far, GOP foot dragging has forced the Senate leadership to file 67 cloture petitions and forced cloture votes on 38 occasions [1] .  Those numbers, while high, aren’t yet on pace to break the record set by the GOP in the last Congress of 139 motions filed and 112 forced votes.  But what is remarkable is that, of those 38 votes forced this year, cloture was invoked 34 times.

That means a full 89% of the time, the cloture vote did nothing but delay the inevitable—a huge increase from the previous high of 56%.

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

Help song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNcShXs_CMM

HELP

(sung to The Beatles song “Help”)

Help, Beck needs somebody
Help, not just anybody
Help, you know Glenn needs someone, help

When Beck was younger, so much younger than today
He would simply booze it up and toke his days away
But now those days are gone since Glenn Beck found the cure
Now it is the Racist Biz in which this small mouse roars

Help Beck if you can, for he may drown
And the President he hates for being brown
Help Glenn as his sponsorships go down
Won’t you please help Glenn B.

And now Glenn’s life has changed in oh so many ways
His advertisers have just vanished in the haze
First it was Geico and Men’s Wearhouse out the door
Now CVS has joined the rest, they’re pulling out for sure

Help Glenn if you can, his smile’s a frown
With all of his advertisers leaving town
How long will Fox News keep him around?
Won’t you please help Glenn B.

When Beck was stronger, way back when in his heyday
He never needed anybody’s help in any way
But now those days are gone and Glenn Beck is abhorred
Fox will find it’s in a bind if he’s not out the door

Help Beck if you can, he’ll make the rounds
His resumé will circulate from town to town
He might find employment as a clown

Sarah Palin and Republican Party Divorce Is Final (Updated)

mommy_stupid

The first important election day since President Obama won the White House is here today. This is also the day that might mark the official demise of Republicans as a viable political party. Regardless of whether New York’s 23rd District Congressional special election is won by the Democratic Party candidate or the third party Conservative Party candidate one thing is certain, the Republican Party will lose another seat in Congress. Despite the fact that the seat has been held by Republicans since the 1870′s and that the seat was most recently vacated by a popular Republican Congressman, the party now has no horse in this race. Republicans can thank Sarah Palin, Dick Armey and Glenn Beck for that.

In the eyes of Palin, Armey and Beck, the Republican party must be purged of all moderates so that only the wacky conservative wing will dictate policy. You are familiar with the wacky conservative wing aren’t you? You know, the Tea-Baggers, the Minutemen Militia, the Ku Klux Klan, Michele “Bat-Shit Crazy” Bachmann and the three aforementioned loonies. The problem is however, that only approximately 20% of the national electorate are registered as Republicans inclusive of the combined numbers of moderates and conservatives. The Palin clan’s plan of forcing Republican candidates to drop out of races by means of endorsing more conservative candidates from a bevy of third parties only ensures that membership in the Republican Party will continue to decrease. Only Palin and company could see any logic in this type of addition by subtraction. Then again, virtually all polling shows that conservatives do not fare well in education comparisons with liberals, so we cannot really blame them for not comprehending this funny math.

Hence, the future of the Republican Party appears to be doomed. Worse yet however, is that this new breed of ultra-conservative third party candidates appears to be as crazy and misguided as their supporters. The most vivid recent example of this is the aforementioned Conservative Party candidate in New York,  Doug Hoffman who recently said, “I pledge my sacred honor” to uphold Glenn Beck’s political principles. He also appeared on Beck’s radio show this week and referred to Beck as “his mentor.” If 23rd District voters send this guy to Washington they might then consider checking into the nervous hospital for a little electro-shock therapy. Let’s hope they see the light and elect Democrat, Bill Owens.

UPDATE: Palin and company have successfully wounded the Republican Party. Democrat, Bill Owens wins New York’s 23rd Congressional District. Republicans lose control of the seat that they held since the 1870′s. Good work, Sarah. Everything she touches turns foul.

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

California Dreamin’ song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2xN9r0bWe78

CONSERVATIVE DREAMIN’

(sung to the Mamas & The Papas song “California Dreamin’”)

All their shirts are brown
(All their shirts are brown)
And their hair is grey
(And their hair is grey)
Listen to them talk
(Listen to them talk)
As they loudly pray
(As they loudly pray)
Scandal is their norm
(Scandal is their norm)
They have one every day
(They have one every day)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
And politics of hate

Members of John Birch
Some won’t admit they’re gay
But when they get down on their knees
(Get down on their knees)
That’s when they like to play
(When they like to play)
These slimy creatures should be told
(Creatures should be told)
Membership’s gone away
(Members gone away)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has led them all astray

(musical interlude)

Glenn Beck is a clown
(Glenn Beck is a clown)
What does Limbaugh weigh?
(What does Limbaugh weigh?)
Palin cannot talk
(Palin cannot talk)
She’s no Tina Fey
(She’s no Tina Fey)
Somebody should tell her
(Somebody should tell her)
To just go away
(To just go away)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has become so cliché
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has lost all its cache´
(Conservative dreamin’)
Drives voters all away

Lynnrockets vs. Republicans

A young Lynnrockets at Nixon fundraiser in Boston.

A young Lynnrockets at Nixon fundraiser in Boston.

OK folks, I have had enough. The Republican Party and its right wing supporters on talk radio and on television’s Fox News have driven me over the edge. Oh, and do not allow me to downplay the role of their supporters, you know, the bat-crazy, racist, homophobic tea-baggers. The whole bunch of rock throwing glass house dwellers deserve a big giant dose of liberal backlash. So let’s give it to them.

The straw that finally broke this camel’s back is the recent opposition to the Obama administration’s attempts to secure Chicago as the site of the 2016 Summer Olympics. The point is now moot in that, as of today, the International Olympic Committee eliminated Chicago and Tokyo. Nevertheless the opposition by the likes of Hannity, Beck and Limbaugh was not only without merit, it was also without reasoned aforethought. To argue that the President has bigger things on his plate than to concern himself with having our nation host the Olympic games is a simple red herring of an argument. Didn’t Republican President Eisenhower have an overseas war to contend with while simultaneously pitching Lake Placid as the site of the 1960 Olympics? Also, since when does the job creation, foreign investment, exciting sporting events and all around goodwill promoted by these games cause harm to the hosting nation which becomes a world showcase for some two weeks?

Finally, where was all the right wing outrage when this letter was penned by former President George W. Bush?

President Bush Meets with Chicago 2016 Bid Committee and United States Olympic Committee Members
Union League Club of Chicago
Chicago, Illinois

// Video (Windows) <a href=”/news/releases/2008/01/20080107-3.wm.v.html” Play Videomce_href=”/news/releases/2008/01/20080107-3.wm.v.html”>/news/releases/2008/01/20080107-3.wm.v.html</a>
RSS Feed Presidential Remarks
Play Audio Audio

11:35 A.M. CST

THE PRESIDENT: I want to thank the members of the 2016 Chicago bid to get the Olympics. Listen, Mr. Mayor, you and your committee have put together a great plan. It’s a plan that will make America proud.

They say that the Olympics will come to Chicago if we’re fortunate enough to be selected, but really it’s coming to America, and I can’t think of a better city to represent the United States than Chicago.
President George W. Bush and Chicago Mayor Richard Daley hold up a T-shirt touting Chicago 2016, during a meeting Monday, Jan. 7, 2008, with with members of the Chicago 2016 Bid Committee and the U.S. Olympic Committee. Said the President, "This country supports your bid, strongly. And our hope is that the judges will take a good look at Chicago and select Chicago for the 2016 Olympics." White House photo by Joyce N. Boghosian This is a well thought out venue. There will be — the athletes will be taken care of. People who will be coming from around the world will find this good city has got fantastic accommodations, great restaurants. It will be safe.

And so I — this country supports your bid, strongly. And our hope is that the judges will take a good look at Chicago and select Chicago for the 2016 Olympics.

Thank you all.

END 11:36 A.M. CST

Hypocrites, one and all. The Olympic opposition proves beyond doubt that these morons are not interested in national pride. They are merely interested in returning to power for power’s sake and they hope to do so by opposing every single decision of the Obama administration regardless of its merits. It is this type of behavior that prodded me to declare war on the right wing. Without the two-faced behavior of the Republicans and their ilk, I may never have decided to start this blog. But start it, I did, and this next song parody sums up who I am and what my mission is. Will anyone join me?

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with this very autobiographical song parody.

I Write The Songs song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-fev20voMc

I WRITE THE SONGS

(sung to the Barry Manilow song “I Write The Songs”)

I sling the jive whenever,
I sit down and scribble a song
I put the words and Republicans together
I love music,
And I love these songs

I write the songs that I hope you folks sing
I write the songs to dethrone G.O.P. kings
I write the songs that expose all their lies
I write the songs, I write the songs

I’m from a state that’s deep blue,
And we make a damned good lobster roll
No, there aren’t many right wing guys
There’s some but then, all of them are very old

I write the songs that attack the right wing
I write the songs that I hope linger and sting
I write the songs that prompt Glenn Beck to cry
I write the songs, I write the songs

Oh, I’ll take a hostile stance
When Limbaugh begins to rave and rant
And I’ll lead you to a poll, he can’t disprove
Palin has no heart,
So, I will tear her life apart
Hannity, Coulter too,
Also, too, O’Reilly
None of them can hide from me !!!

I write the songs about Mark Sanford’s flings
I write the songs about Larry Craig’s stings
I write the songs about Mark Foley’s guys
I write the songs, I write the songs

I write the songs about Joe Wilson’s slings
I write the songs of Vitter’s diapery things
I write the songs about all of those guys
I write the songs, I write the songs

I love music, so I write these songs

Mt. Vernon City Council Says, “Get The Beck Outta Here !!!”

Glenn Beck on his Fox News show last week.

Glenn Beck on his Fox News show last week.

Last week was not a particularly good one for Glenn Beck. His first faux pas occurred when he tried to make a point on his Fox News program by throwing some frogs (he claims they were rubber) into a pot of boiling water. The only new fans he gained by that stunt were Michael Vick and his posse. The rest of civilized America was understandably disgusted by his actions.

Next, he was skewered by fellow conservative Joe Scarborough on Morning Joe which airs daily on MSNBC. Watch the clip below which also includes denunciations of Beck by Robert Frum, Mark Levin, David Brooks, Peter Wehner, the dim-witted Elisabeth Hasselbeck from The View and Republican congressman, Bob Inglis of South Carolina.

Finally, you might remember the announcement about one month ago that Mount Vernon, Washington’s (Beck’s former hometown) Republican mayor, Bob Norris had unilaterally decided to honor Glenn Beck by presenting him with the keys to the city. The mayor’s action however, triggered a firestorm which prompted 16, 000 of the city’s 26, 000 residents to present a petition to the city demanding that the honor be withdrawn because of Beck’s hate filled rhetoric. Although the mayor declined to withdraw the honor, Mount Vernon’s city council unanimously approved a resolution stating that the “City Council is in no way sponsoring the Mayor’s event…and is not connected to the Glenn Beck event in any manner.”

The event took place on Saturday, September 26th, but hundreds of protesters appeared. They wore t-shirts and placards which stated, “Hate is not a Mount Vernon value” and “Hate kills.” Additionally, a plane circled above the event pulling a sign which read, “Change the locks!” it must be tough when you are despised in your own home town.

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

That Smell song clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6q9nBusrq8

BECK’S SMELL

(sung to the Lynyrd Skynyrd song “That Smell”)

Whiskey bottles and drug filled jars
Those were Glenn Beck’s best days
Way too much coke and too much smoke
How does Fox News take pride in you?

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Yeah,

Angel of darkness is in our view
He’s a weasel doing harm (you fool, you)
The bloviating bloke, has a show that just blows
Have a drink, fool, you clown, you (hell, yeah)

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Righties call Beck prince charming
They take his word as the gospel truth
Yet Glenn Beck’s logic is hollow, and
Fox News just might learn he has no clue (no, clue)

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

(musical interlude)

Oh, Glenn Beck’s views
Do nothing else but spread alarm
Beck’s a fear-mongering bore

(musical interlude)

Beck has his own little Waterloo

It’s a monkey on his back
Sponsors have split from his racist schticks
One hell of a price and Beck’s show might get nixed (hell, yeah)

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Oh, Glenn Beck’s views
Do nothing else but spread alarm
Beck’s just a fool, just a fool, just a fool.

Being (Barney) Frank With Tea-Baggers

Anti-Health Care Reform Protesters and their clever signs

Anti-Health Care Reform Protesters and their clever signs

I do not mean to brag, but sometimes I am very proud that I live in Massachusetts, the “Cradle of Liberty.” In this most blue of all blue states, political discourse is welcomed. Starting with those “Founding Fathers” that conservative Republicans love to invoke so frequently, through those hate filled days of court imposed desegregated school busing in the 1970′s, and right up to today’s Anti-Health Care Reform protests at congressional town hall meetings, Bay Staters have encouraged vigorous public debate. Perhaps it is a by-product of the over 120 colleges and universities in the Boston metropolitan area, that the population is educated and enlightened enough to realize that well informed decision making will trump ill-informed rabble rousing most every time. That might also explain why the Commonwealth has never in its 389 year history, had a Republican Governor serve two full terms.

But I digress. The purpose of this particular post is to illustrate how to best conduct a town hall meeting when alleged protesters that are bought, paid for and bussed to the meeting by Republican interest groups funded by Republican lobbying firms attempt to disrupt the meetings rather than to engage in thoughtful discussion. To that end, please welcome Congressman Barney Frank.

On August 18, 2009, Frank held a town hall meeting in Dartmouth, MA. There were plenty of Health Care Reform supporters and vocal opponents. Unlike many of his brethren throughout the country however, Frank did not cancel his meeting, phone-in his meeting, or resort to accepting only written questions. On the contrary, he explained precisely why he supported health care reform, allowed opponents to question him and provided thorough fact based answers to those questions.

Whenever an opponent resorted to the Republican Interest Group tactic of simply disrupting the meeting by means of screaming and shouting out talking points, Frank confronted them directly. He shamed them, in no uncertain terms, by telling them that such behavior was counter-productive to their cause and would not be tolerated. When attacked by shouted myths of health care reform, such as mandated coverage for illegal immigrants, death panels and budget implosion, he calmly countered with facts taken verbatim from the draft of the most recent incarnation of the proposed bill. In short, he held his ground.

Most impressive however, was the way in which he handled those opponents that displayed personally derogatory illustrations of the President and/or made Nazi comparisons. He fired back at them without pulling any punches. To one woman that displayed a caricature of President Obama in which he resembled Hitler, Frank berated her by asking what planet she came from and then told her that trying to hold a conversation with her was akin to having a conversation with his living room table. She was silenced by her own absurdity.

Barney Frank has manufactured the template for all members of Congress to utilize at town hall meetings. Have a comprehensive knowledge of your material; express it thoroughly yet succinctly; allow opponents to question you civilly and respond in kind; and when confronted by ill informed obtrusive or insulting behavior, exercise your 2nd Amendment rights and fire back unapologetically. To you Mr. Frank, I say, “Bravo.”

Please do yourself a favor and watch this entire clip. They should make multiple copies and hand them out to every member of Congress.

OK, now for the funny stuff. Today’s song parody is my version of the Tea-Baggers’ National Anthem. As Sarah Palin would say, in honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along. (As an aside, please note that the music video link is in honor of recently deceased filmmaker, John Hughes and is a clip from his wonderful film, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off)

Twist And Shout song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUrOMB-iBLk&feature=related

BITCH AND SHOUT

(sung to The Beatles version of the song “Twist And Shout”)

Well, make it up, ladies, now (make it up, ladies)
Bitch and shout (bitch and shout)
C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, ladies, now (come on ladies)
Know what you’re talkin’ about (talking about)

Start spreadin’ some doubt, honey (spreadin’ some doubt)
Wear your pillowcase hood (pointy hood)
You got the bullshit flowin’ now (bullshit flowin’)
And you’re sportin’ some wood (didn’t know you could)

Just make it up, baby, now (make it up, baby)
Bitch and shout (bitch and shout)
C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, baby, now (come on baby)
You got to start spreadin’ doubt (start spreading doubt)

Just show your twisted little world (shit little world)
Hold up your twisted sign (twisted sign)
Go on up, bitch a little closer, now (bitch a little closer)
And just hold that party line (hold that party line)

Ah
Ahh
Ahhh
Ahhhh
Ahhhhh

Yeah, you’re frothing like rabies, now (frothing like rabies)
Bitch and shout (bitch and shout)
C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, baby, now (come on baby)
Jumping and screeching out loud (screaming out loud)

Just show your twisted little world (shit little world)
Hold up your twisted sign (twisted sign)
Go on up, bitch a little closer, now (bitch a little closer)
And just hold that party line (hold that party line)

Well, fake it, fake it, fake it, baby, now (make it up, baby)
Well, fake it, fake it, fake it, baby, now (make it up, baby)
Well, fake it, fake it, fake it, baby, now (make it up, baby)

Ah
Ahh
Ahhh
Ahhhh

Town Hall Protest Bus Tour Rolls Into Town

Health care reform protesters arrive at Town Hall Meeting.

Health care reform protesters arrive at Town Hall Meeting.

It has finally been factually established that the Tea-Bagger inspired Town Hall Protesters are actually reich-wing corporation-funded day-laborers. Gee, and we believed that it was actually a true grass-roots movement of informed citizens expressing their constitutionally protected opinions on health care reform (he said sarcastically). Have you actually looked at these pseudo protesters on television? If you have, it is evident that some sort of grass is involved.

But we digress. We all know that powerful rich folks cannot be bothered to take time away from the country club or yacht club to engage in the mundane, trivial, and dare we say working class, aspects of civil public protest. Remember the Major League Baseball strike of 1984 when the millionaire professional athletes could not be bothered with manning their own picket lines, so they hired homeless folks to walk the lines and carry signs for them? Well, the same thing is happening now with these Town Hall protests.

It turns out that one of the groups sponsoring and promoting the hiring and bussing of protesters is the Washington D.C. lobbying group, FreedomWorks. The chairman of FreedomWorks is former Republican Majority Leader, Dick Armey. FreedomWorks in turn, controls a subgroup known as Tea Party Patriots and a leaked memo from one of its volunteers explains the tactics used by the organization, not to engage in public discussion of a public policy issue of importance, but to simply disrupt public meetings. The memo (reproduced in its entirety by ThinkProgress here) instructs members as follows:

– Artificially Inflate Your Numbers: “Spread out in the hall and try to be in the front half. The objective is to put the Rep on the defensive with your questions and follow-up. The Rep should be made to feel that a majority, and if not, a significant portion of at least the audience, opposes the socialist agenda of Washington.”

– Be Disruptive Early And Often: “You need to rock-the-boat early in the Rep’s presentation, Watch for an opportunity to yell out and challenge the Rep’s statements early.”

– Try To “Rattle Him,” Not Have An Intelligent Debate: “The goal is to rattle him, get him off his prepared script and agenda. If he says something outrageous, stand up and shout out and sit right back down. Look for these opportunities before he even takes questions.”

These meeting-crashers are bussed to Town Hall Meeting sites by a group known as Americans For Prosperity. This is another Washington D.C. advocacy group founded and chaired by David Koch of Koch Industries (the largest privately owned oil refinery and pipeline business in the U.S.) and coincidentally, the 19th richest man in the world. The whole promotional event is known as the Americans For Prosperity’s Patients First Bus Tour.

So, if you are unfortunate enough to run into one of these busloads of fake grass roots protesters, ask them if Mr. Armey, Mr. Koch, or any of their buddies in the “richest people in the world club” are riding on the coach. You know what the answer will be. Do not be intimidated. Remember that these folks are simply day-laborors paid for by very rich conservatives that are not interested in the health of the citizens of (as Sarah Palin would say) “this great nation of ours.” They are only interested in preserving the profits of the insurance industry and pharmaceutical concerns.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Magical Mystery Tour song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7pvA4EHi08

THE TRAGICAL MISERY TOUR

(sung to The Beatles song “Magical Mystery Tour”)

Roll up, roll up for the tragical misery tour. Step right this way.

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up AND THAT’S AN INVITATION, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, A TOWN HALL DESTINATION, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour is eating your brain cells away
Eating your brain cells away

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, WE DON’T CARE IF YOU CAN’T READ, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, SO LONG AS YOU CAN SCREAM, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour will even pay you for the day
Even pay you for the day

(The misery trip is waiting)

Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, TO MAKE A RESERVATION, roll up for the misery tour
Roll up, JUST STOP THEIR CONVERSATION, roll up for the misery tour
The tragical misery tour wants insurers to keep their payday
Please help them to have their way
The tragical misery tour is hoping that you die away
After you make your co-pay, make your co-pay

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