Category Archives: Michelle Malkin

Childish Michelle Malkin Has A Meltdown

Why does Fox News consistently avoid utilizing mature adults as guests on its programs? It is understood that the number of legitimate and serious conservative pundits is extremely limited, but Fox News seems to revel in giving airtime to child-like whiners. Consider the number of times that Sean Hannity and Bill O’Reilly have hosted the likes of Sarah Palin, Ann Coulter and Donald Trump rather than George F. Will or Peggy Noonan.

Wednesday night was a perfect example of Fox‘s studio serving as a psuedo-televised day-care for what appeared to be an over-tired and cranky guest. This time the bratty baby du jour was conservative blogger Michelle Malkin. She and Juan Williams were guests on the Hannity program and the topic was the alleged leaking of information from the Obama administration regarding proposed cyber attacks on Iran’s nuclear facilities.

Setting aside the actual content of the subject and debate between Williams and Malkin (and her cheerleader Sean Hannity), it was entertaining (and disturbing) to witness the histrionics of Michelle Malkin. She was so overly concerned with attacking her debate opponent that she resorted to making faces, eye-rolling, sneering and huffing. Most entertaining was her kindergarten-like schoolyard repetitive mocking of Williams when she exclaimed, “All you can do, Juan, is say, ‘Plame, Plame, Plame’ and ‘blame, blame, blame, Bush, Bush, Bush!” She also went on a childish name-calling tantrum when she said, “The American people are sick of the kind of snotty condescension from liberal elite journalists like Juan Williams.” But as they say, “a video is worth a thousand words”, so let’s enjoy the show:

It is people like Michelle Malkin that make blogging so fun for so many of us.

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along to today’s song parody.

The Monster Mash song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FeZftK2kO6U

THE MALKIN MASH

(sung to the Bobby “Boris” Pickett song “Monster Mash”)

She was mouthing off with gab late one night
Malkin’s strange visage, an eerie sight
My blood pressure and pulse both began to rise
What’s up with that weird lazy eye?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

She was ruminating on Obama’s speech
When her logic and her brains went to the beach
We knew she was lying by her growing nose
Inside her skull, a mighty wind blows

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Dear Malkin was having fun
Her air-time had just begun
It was quite apparent that
Michelle had come undone

The show was rockin’ with her babbling sounds
Michelle spewing sentences without nouns
There were blood-shot lines in her crazy ass eyes
One thing missing was the strait-jacket guys

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Out from the closet came the Coulter thing
He was wearing his decoder ring
Waving it round because he was pissed
Have you ever seen so much hair on anybody’s fist?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Now everything’s cool, Coulter hid his big hand
And Malkin’s diatribe was critically panned
It was one giant laugh if it was viewed
Next time we see that jerk, she is sure to be booed.

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

A Saturday List To Think About And Comment Upon

Please read this list and then describe what thought comes to mind in the comment section:

  • Glenn Beck
  • Ron Paul
  • Rush Limbaugh
  • Donald Trump
  • Michelle Malkin
  • Newt Gingrich
  • Ann Coulter
  • Michele Bachmann
  • Sean Hannity
  • Sarah Palin
  • Laura Ingraham
  • Rand Paul
  • Tucker Carlson
  • Rudi Giuliani
  • Christine O’Donnell
  • Larry Craig
  • Michael Savage
  • David Vitter
  • Scott Brown
  • Dick Morris
  • Fox News
  • Dick Cheney
  • Tea Party

Here’s what comes to my mind:

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Strangers In The Night song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlSbSKNk9f0&feature=related

STRANGE ONES ON THE RIGHT

(sung to the Frank Sinatra song “Strangers In The Night”)

Strange ones on the right,
Fox News romancers
Not so very bright,
With our finances
This Tea Party love
Should be viewed as taboo

Palin shouting lies
And fear inciting
Rand Paul is hostile
And so damn frightening
Boehner has no heart
McConnell has no clue

Strange ones on the right,
Abnormal people
They are strange ones on the right
Not one sane moment
They should be in a freak-show
Little do they know
It would just enhance our day
If like Bristol they’d dance away and –

And on Fox every night,
They’re all together
Lovers on the right
In love forever
It’s an ugly sight
Those strange ones on the right

(Tea-Bagging break)

Don’t look now just glance away
Here comes their jailbird Tom Delay

You can join their fight
And hang together
Only if you’re white
Birds of a feather
Taking their last flight
Those strange ones on the right

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 81

Just a few newsworthy items (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week but may have escaped your attention. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS:  The Republicans have been correct all along. There is voter fraud. Unfortunately for the GOP however, it is their side that appears to be committing it. Firedoglake.com reports that in Wisconsin three of the recall elections against Republican state senators have been certified. Additionally, there is a hearing scheduled this week to deal with challenges to the other six – three against Republicans, three against Democrats. But the Government Accountability Board has delayed the decision on the Democratic recalls, because of allegations of faulty signature-gathering.

THIS JUST IN:  Conservative commentator George F. Will appeared on ABC’s “This Week” and said this about the possibility of Sarah Palin being trusted with nuclear weapons,

“The threshold question, not usually asked, but it’s in everyone’s mind in a presidential election. ‘Should we give this person nuclear weapons?’ And the answer [in Palin's case], answers itself.”

Ouch! That is going to leave a mark.

BREAKING NEWS:  Question of the week. How many more innocent people must be gunned down in Arizona before that renegade state gets serious about gun control?

THIS JUST IN:  A California Federal court judge has ruled that the civil lawsuit filed by a former ACORN employee against propaganda film-maker James O’Keefe III and an associate can move forward. O’Keefe is the person who posed as a pimp and secretly recorded a conversation with the ACORN employee before publishing an extensively edited version. The California Attorney General’s Office investigated Acorn in 2009, but ultimately found that the conversations, while “highly inappropriate,” were not in violation of state criminal laws. In the case at bar, U.S. Judge M. James Lorenz ruled that the First Amendment does not protect the alleged illegal conduct of the two conservative activists.

BREAKING NEWS:  It was nice to see Fox News take a beating this week. Newscorpse.com reports that “This was a really bad month for Fox News which lost viewers in the demo for every primetime show. Bill O’Reilly dropped 9%, Sean Hannity dropped 6%, and Greta Van Susteren dropped 12%. These declines occurred while almost every primetime program for both CNN and MSNBC gained by double digits. The only good news for Fox is that Glenn Beck, which sunk 17% in the demo, has already been canceled so he can’t do too much more harm. An interesting wrinkle in this book is that MSNBC was also the number one cable news network among 18-34 year-olds in primetime, with a 7% advantage over CNN and a 14% lead over Fox News.”

THIS JUST IN: Sarah Palin quote of the week. While participating in the Rolling Thunder motorcycle rally last week in Washington DC, the former ex-quitting half-term governor of Alaska said, “I love that smell of the emissions!” ‘Nuff said.

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s episode of “Publicity Stunts That Keep Repeating Themselves” features Donald Trump. The bankrupt billionaire now says that he has not ruled out running for President in 2012. This time however, The Donald states that he may run as an Independent. Let’s hope that he does and thereby splits the Republican vote!

THIS JUST IN: Mark your calendars and begin planning the party. it has been announced that Glenn Beck‘s Fox News program will finally be cancelled on June 30th. Can I have an “Amen”?

BREAKING NEWS:  Fox News comment of the week. Headline: “Los Angeles Police Nab ‘Main Aggressor’ In Giants Fan Beating”. Comment: “a thousand Mexocans should die for what happened to Mr. Stow. why do we continue to put up with this race of brown vermin.. why???”

THIS JUST IN:  The newest Republican Presidential candidate has put himself at odds with his party and its base yet again. Mitt Romney yesterday reaffirmed his view that global warming is occurring and that humans are contributing to it. This may spell doom for his election chances as conservatives do not believe in science.

BREAKING NEWS: Just in case you somehow missed it, here is Sarah Palin‘s version of Paul Revere’s ride which she gave while in Boston this week:

He was warning the British? He was ringing bells? Wouldn’t ringing bells defeat the whole purpose of quietly lighting the lanterns so as not to alert the enemy? Palin really should have Netflix send over those school-House Rock dvd’s before she makes any more public statements.

THIS JUST IN:  Just wondering, but has anyone heard from Ann “The Man” Coulter or Michelle “Anchor Baby” Malkin lately? Where have these two big mouths slithered off to? Their 15 minutes must have expired.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

AM Radio song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDiCJkITtes&feature=player_embedded

RIGHT WING RADIO

(sung to the Everclear song “AM Radio”)

Portions of this lame programming are reproduced
By means of electronical transcriptions or tape recordings.

Radio
You can hear that bullshit on the right wing radio

There’s Ann Coulter and Sean Hannity
There’s lots of that Glenn Beck’s crap
Heavy on insanity

It’s simulcast along
The world wide webs

They’re pouring out pitchers full of Kool-Aid
Through the internets grid

Tea-Bagging clowns
On the air waves

Won’t talk to you if you’re black, young or gay

Limbaugh taught ‘em
The EIB chair
Is so toxic and vile
And it is unbalanced and unfair

Yo!
You must listen
To the poison on
That right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Yeah… there’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)

Savage is without a clue
Steers clear of every single neighborhood
In a state if that state is “Blue”

Malkin
Makes an ungodly sound
Crazy shit she’s into
Cruisin’ with that Glenn Beck clown

These nuts are broadcast across the nation
To the dumb and poor
Who mimic them like apes

They’re all right their at prime-time
Sean Hannity looks fried
Bill O’Reilly and that Sarah P. lie all goddamn night

Don’t lie in bed with the radio on
You will lose your sanity before long
When you hear Glenn Beck and his song

There’s lots of hate
And you can hear it
On that right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Yeah… there’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)

Listen to Limbaugh say
“Boy…Let’s bring Obama down!”

Oh no, “The Glenn Beck” show again.
I don’t wanna hear that show
Talk about “end times” and socialism, man, he such a fool
Turn it off
(Turn it off, turn it off, turn it off)

Sean Hannity is on at five
I feel like throwing up
When he spins
All that lame jive
Lives in a bubble where he is “the man”
Can’t be trusted
Cuz he lies
Like Glenn Beck and that’s a fact, man

Remember way back in two-thousand-seven
They said Romney and his cohorts
Would be leading us to heaven
If ol’ Rush Limbaugh
Could have had his way
“Operation Chaos”
Would have had Hilary Clinton
On election day
Hey!
Election day!
Hey!
No way!
Hey Rush, go away!

There must be a place we can tell them to go
A real hot place where they don’t have any snow
But they’re sure to have right wing radio

Huh-uh huh-uh huh-uh huh

Yeah, things get real stupid
On those stupid shows
The hosts are really daffy

There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)
There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio)
There’s no need for music
On right wing radio (right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Make it stop (right wing radio, right wing radio)…It grows old
Please make it stop
Reminds me of bad disco
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
Reminds me of bad disco (right wing radio)
…No I never liked (right wing radio) disco! (right wing radio)
Nooooo (right wing radio) oooooo! (right wing radio)
(right wing radio, right wing radio)
Nooooooo!
(right wing radio, right wing radio)

Hannity and Malkin: A Fox News Duo of Dimwittery

By now, everyone that pays attention has heard about the brutal sexual assault in Egypt of Lara Logan, the CBS News journalist. While reporting on the celebration by Egyptian protesters which erupted when it was announced that President Hosni Mubarak was stepping down, Logan was somehow separated from her security team and thereafter was brutally sexually assaulted for a period of 20 to 30 minutes. It is assumed that the attack was carried out by some protesters. After the assault, Logan immediately returned to the United States where she received medical treatment. She has since been released from the hospital and she plans to return to work in the very near future. She suffered a terrible ordeal and most everyone hopes that she recovers both physically and emotionally.

Those are the facts. That is what has been reported on the Lara Logan situation. That being said however, the folks over at Fox News have decided to put the conservative spin on things. As usual, the network has elected to provide an unfair and unbalanced assessment of the situation. One example is the misinformation and spin by Sean Hannity and his guest Michelle Malkin on Wednesday evening.

On “Hannity”, the host briefly repeated the facts as we know them, but then he jumped right into the spin and misinformation with his guest. Hannity said, “And I read this and I was thinking about, you know – wasn’t this supposed to be the peaceful demonstration and we have one journalist after another…” First of all he was mistaken by blaming all of the journalist harassment incidents on one side. It appears at this point in time that Logan was attacked by anti-Mubarak protesters but many other journalists were attacked by pro-Mubarak supporters and officials. Indeed, just 8 days prior to her sexual assault, Lara Logan and her crew were arrested and beaten and jailed by the Egyptian police. Logan said of that incident, “We were not attacked by crazy people in Tahrir Square. We were detained by the Egyptian army. Arrested, detained, and interrogated. Blindfolded, handcuffed, taken at gunpoint, our driver beaten. It’s the regime that arrested us. They arrested [our producer] just outside of his hotel, and they took him off the road at gunpoint, threw him against the wall, handcuffed him, blindfolded him. Took him into custody like that.” Hannity however, made no distinction and failed to report the true set of circumstances. Moreover, he implied that the civilian uprising was far more violent than the mainstream media would lead us to believe despite the fact that as far as uprisings go, the Egyptian uprising was far more peaceful than most.

Michelle Malkin then jumped in and correctly stated, “It’s monstrous. Many women, in particular, will tell you this is business as usual for many parts of the Middle East.” This is true, it has been widely reported that  “gropings” and “assaults” of women have been witnessed throughout the uprising. It is no secret that women are treated as second-class citizens (and/or chattel) in many parts of the Middle Eastern world.

Yet as soon as she said that, Malkin began her conservative and baseless spin. She said, “I think that if CBS News and the rest of the mainstream media want to do right by her and right by all the other journalists who were attacked last week and over the course of the last two weeks, what they will do is finally find some spine and refuse to whitewash the truth about who these assailants were, what they were motivated by.” She then went on to continue criticizing the mainstream media (i.e. any media other than Fox News) by failing to report on “the root causes of anti-Americanism that is festering in these places in the Middle East”.

First of all, somebody at Fox should have informed Michelle Malkin that Lara Logan is not American. She is a South African (perhaps her accent should have been a clue). Secondly, Malkin failed to mention that during the attack, onlookers were reported to have been shouting “Jew, Jew, Jew”. It has been pretty well established over the years that Muslims and Jews do not always hold each other in the highest esteem. Perhaps Malkin missed that memo. In fact, it is interesting to note that when Logan and her crew were arrested by the military a week earlier, it was on suspicion that they were Israeli spies. There is nothing to suggest that Lara logan’s assault had anything to do with anti-Americanism.

It is somewhat understandable as to why Fox News always misrepresents facts and even lies to simplify a story. It is network policy to ensure that every story reinforces the radically conservative right-wing agenda. Additionally, complicated story-lines are simply beyond the grasp of the simple-minded Fox News hosts and their audience. Fox and its audience operate only on the simplest of mathematical equations:

Americans = Always good; Foreign Nations = Always bad; Republicans = Always good; Democrats = Always bad; War = Always good; Peace = Always bad

There you have it.

Inasmuch as both Sean Hannity and Michelle Malkin had a starring role in today’s blog post, Lynnrockets will treat you Rocketeers to a double dose of song parody. Please enjoy.

Please remember to click on the song links below to familiarize yourselves with the tunes and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parodies.

Saturday In The Park song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5bhBSb92LY

HANNITY IN THE DARK

(sung to the Chicago song “Saturday In The Park”)

Hannity in the dark
You’d think that he would open his eyes
Hannity in the dark
It’s rhetoric that the reich wing buys
Keeps us barfing, keeps us laughing
The man is a lame-brain
G.O.P. talking points
Ixnay on the truthiness
Do you dig it? (no, we don’t)
And he’s been at it such a long time
Sean Hannity

Hannity in the dark
You’d think that he would open his eyes
Hannity in the dark
It’s rhetoric that the reich wing buys
His tough talking, while he’s smiling
Scared of waterboarding
Chicken-hawk with gall
Olbermann exposed the fool
Can you dig it? (yes, we can)
And Alan Colmes was such a nice guy
Yesterday

Slow thinking dropout without a college degree
A bought man just can shill for the G.O.P.
Fox News execs know they’re his boss
Know they’re his boss (oh, yeah, yeah)

In a daze, in the dark
Every day’s a day full of lies
In a haze, off the mark
He’s just like Limbaugh in disguise
Embellishing and misleading
An abomination
Like the Berlin Wall
An idiot, pitching a fit
Can you dig it? (no, we can’t)
And he’s been at it such a long time
Hannity

The Monster Mash song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FeZftK2kO6U

THE MALKIN MASH

(sung to the Bobby “Boris” Pickett song “Monster Mash”)

She was mouthing off with gab late one night
Malkin’s strange visage, an eerie sight
My blood pressure and pulse both began to rise
What’s up with that weird lazy eye?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

She was ruminating on Obama’s speech
When her logic and her brains went to the beach
We knew she was lying by her growing nose
Inside her skull, a mighty wind blows

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Dear Malkin was having fun
Her air-time had just begun
It was quite apparent that
Michelle had come undone

The show was rockin’ with her babbling sounds
Michelle spewing sentences without nouns
There were blood-shot lines in her crazy ass eyes
One thing missing was the strait-jacket guys

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Out from the closet came the Coulter thing
He was wearing his decoder ring
Waving it round because he was pissed
Have you ever seen so much hair on anybody’s fist?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Now everything’s cool, Coulter hid his big hand
And Malkin’s diatribe was critically panned
It was one giant laugh if it was viewed
Next time we see that jerk, she is sure to be booed.

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Is Fox News And Tea Party Hatred to Blame For This Atrocity?

This is truly breaking (heart-breaking) news. CNN has just reported that at least 12 people were shot at a Tucson, Arizona grocery store on Saturday, and Democratic U.S. Rep. Gabrielle Giffords was among them. The network reports that, “Giffords, 40, was holding a constituent meeting at the grocery store when the shooting occurred, according to a schedule posted on her website.” The Tuscon Citizen newspaper reports that Giffords was shot in the head.

Giffords won her third term in a closely contested race against a Tea Party-sponsored candidate and was one of three Democratic legislators who reported vandalism at their offices following the March vote on health care reform.

It is obviously too early to place blame for this atrocity until we learn more about the assailant. Nevertheless, if it is determined that the shooter targeted the Democratic Representative for political reasons,  Fox News hosts such as Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck may be morally culpable for fostering an atmosphere encouraging revolution-like actions against the Democratic Party controlled government. Is it any wonder that at some point violence might be triggered by Palin’s inappropriate rhetoric such as “Don’t Retreat. Reload”, or her infamous website ad which targeted certain Democrats (including Giffords) for electoral defeat by means of placing gun-sight symbols over their judicial districts on a U.S. map? Has Glenn Beck’s near constant comparison of the Obama administration to communists, socialists or even Hitler fostered an atmosphere of sober and reasoned political discourse? Of course not. These far-right conservative radicals have stopped just short of actually calling for violence against government officials. On a daily basis they remind the easily influenced Tea Party members of the glory of our nation’s armed revolution. Indeed, during the most recent election cycle Tea Party candidate Sharron Angle went so far as to say that the public should bring down an out-of-control Congress with “Second Amendment remedies.”

The far-right media and politicians refused to castigate those people that attended Tea Party rallies armed with guns. They turned the truth upside down when they defended the Tea Partier that assaulted and stepped on the head of a defenseless woman at a Rand Paul event. Every time some far-right conservative takes their bait and like a hungry dog devouring raw meat, starts talking about “taking back the government” and stocking up on guns and ammunition, the likes of Beck, Palin, Limbaugh, Malkin, Coulter and Hannity defend these crackpots by claiming that they are simply expressing their frustration. Their thinly veiled encouragement of violence either threatened or actual is despicable.

I hope from the bottom of my heart that today’s shooting was the work of a person with a severe mental disability who picked a random target and not a person motivated by what seems to be an ever-increasing level of political hatred. The mentally disabled person works alone while the politically motivated person is likely only one of many that may resort to lethal violence. It is time for the hate-spreading far-right media and politicians to realize this and tone down their rhetoric and tacit encouragement of violence.

No song parody today. I see no humor in this tragic event. My prayers are with Ms. Giffords and the other innocent shooting victims.

Palin Shunned By Conservative Women’s Group (Again!)

They have done it again. As we have said before, sometimes you just can’t make this stuff up. I pull my head away from the football games for just one moment and I learn that the The Clare Boothe Luce (whoever the hell she is) Policy Institute has released its sixth annual “Great American Conservative Women Calendar for 2011“. Besides the fact that the words, “Great American” and “Conservative Women” are mutually exclusive, who in the mad, mad, mad, mad, mad world of marketing ever could believe that such a thing could sell? There are going to be so many unwanted copies of this thing that they should just hang them up at the U.S Post Office next to the photos of all of those wanted felons.

Rather than list the names of the morons that will be featured in the calendar, we felt that we should simply incorporate them into today’s song parody. Please take note however, that even this conservative brain-trust elected once again not to associate itself with Sarah Palin. The former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska and former beauty-queen runner-up is now persona non grata in her own political circles. Heck, even Senator Scott Brown (R-MA) was asked to pose nude for a centerfold. When will Palin’s Facebook/Twitter backlash take place?

Please enjoy.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

Lynnrockets needs your help. Boston’s largest talk radio station (WRKO AM) has chosen Lynnrockets as a finalist in its “Next Great Political Blogger Contest”. Yours truly has been selected  by the station’s staff (from over 200 entries) to be one of 10 finalists for a position with the station as a “liberal” blogger. There will be two winners (a “liberal” and a “conservative”) chosen by means of internet votes received. This is our chance to get even with the Palinbots for what they did for Bristol Palin on “Dancing With The Stars”. Like Bristol, I lack talent but with all of you voting for me, I may be able to pull-off an upset win. I offer my eternal gratitude if you loyal Rocketeers will visit the WRKO website (Here) and vote for wait…wait…here comes the spoiler…”Kevin McCarthy”. Looks like I’ve now been officially outed. Please vote early and often as the contest ends on Saturday, December 11th at 11:59pm EST. I would truly appreciate your help and if you really want to be of assistance, please encourage your family and friends to vote also, too!

Calendar Girl song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qUlOyj9F5gM

Remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the parody.

CALENDAR GALS

(sung to the Neil Sedaka song “Calendar Girl”)

Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Right wing calendar gals
Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Preaching those politics of fear

(January) Who is Kate Obenshain?
(February) Some Claire Boothe Luce dame
(March) Ann Coulter has a mannish smile
(April) Michelle Malkin’s breath smells just like bile
Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl
Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

(May) Monica Crowey is a Fox alum
(June) Ms. Tantaros is so very dumb
(July) Michele Bachmann looks like a ‘ho
(August) Michelle Duggar must really need the dough
Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl
Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

(musical interlude)

Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl
Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

(September) Bay Buchanan’s from the 70′s
(October) Amanda Carpenter can’t count to three
(November) The Cupp chick goes by the name S.E.
(December) That Star Parker keeps strange company
Yeah, yeah, I just wanna hurl
Every time I take a look at those calendar girls
Every day (oh, dismay)
Every day (oh, dismay)
Of the year
(every day of the year)

Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Right wing calendar gals
Beck loves, Beck loves, Beck loves his calendar gals
Preaching those politics of fear

New Rule: Nobody Else Is Hitler!

Bill Maher of course, provides the inspiration behind the title of today’s blog entry. The Tea-Baggers, Glenn Beck, Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, Michele Bachmann, Sarah Palin and the rest of the out of control far-right conservatives should learn a lesson from the Germans about the absurdity of comparing people like President Obama to Adolf Hitler. Let’s hope this targeted audience is educated enough to read and comprehend the following excerpted portions from Germany’s Der Tagesspiegel newspaper titled, “Everyone Lately Is Just ‘Like Hitler’”:

“We Germans wince when we hear about people being compared to Hitler….But if Germans understand the enormity of the insult, others evidently do not. It’s ‘preposterous’ that President Obama can hardly get through a day without some Republican calling him Hitler, as if the mild-mannered democrat could have anything in common with history’s most evil dictator….Foreigners should get this clear: If your enemy started a world war and nearly exterminated entire ethnic groups, then fair enough; if not, he’s not ‘like Hitler’”

If only the extreme right-wing loonies could ponder that lesson, they would understand how ridiculous they appear when the rest of America and the world witness stuff like this:

Glenn Beck: “I am not comparing him (Obama) to this, but please read Mein Kampf for this reason. If you read it now you see that Hitler told you what he was gong to do…Please America, take this man (Obama) for what he says.”;

Rush Limbaugh: “Obama’s got a health care logo that’s right out of Adolf Hitler’s playbook…Adolf Hitler, like Barack Obama, also ruled by dictate.”;

Ann “The Man” Coulter: “With one association after another, that is beyond the pale with Barack Obama, I feel like we are talking to the Germans after Hitler comes to power, saying ‘Oh, well, I didn’t know. I had no idea he was gonna be like this.’ With this guy, Americans ought to know.”;

Michele Bachmann: Bachmann (R-Crazy Town) endorsed a conference sponsored by the Citizens Council on Health Care in which the featured speaker said, “Obama, like Hitler, is ‘a charismatic leader who promises full pocketbooks…He would pave the way for a future Antichrist. Obama scares me because he has no record and people flock to him. Hitler also had no record, people flocked to him and both wrote a book. Christians laid flat and Hitler came to power, just like with Obama.”;

Sarah Palin: The former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska encouraged her Twitter readers to read an article comparing the Obama administration forcing BP to establish an escrow fund to compensate victims of the Gulf oil spill to Nazism. Her tweet said, “This is about the rule of law vs. an unconstitutional power grab. Read Thomas Sowell’s article.” Of course Sowell’s article begins like this,

“When Adolf Hitler was building up the Nazi movement in the 1920s, leading up to his taking power in the 1930s, he deliberately sought to activate people who did not normally pay much attention to politics. In our times, American democracy is being dismantled piece by piece, before our very eyes by the current administration in Washington, and few people seem to be concerned about it.”

Michelle Malkin: A picture is worth a thousand words:

Michelle Malkin poses with "swastika/Obama" Tea-Bagger

Assorted Tea-Baggers: Once again, a picture is worth a thousand words:

That noise is the morning school bell. All of those mentioned above please report to class immediately so that you can potentially learn something.

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT

Lynnrockets needs your help. Boston’s largest talk radio station (WRKO AM) has chosen Lynnrockets as a finalist in its “Next Great Political Blogger Contest”. Yours truly has been selected  by the station’s staff (from over 200 entries) to be one of 10 finalists for a position with the station as a “liberal” blogger. There will be two winners (a “liberal” and a “conservative”) chosen by means of internet votes received. This is our chance to get even with the Palinbots for what they did for Bristol Palin on “Dancing With The Stars”. Like Bristol, I lack talent but with all of you voting for me, I may be able to pull-off an upset win. I offer my eternal gratitude if you loyal Rocketeers will visit the WRKO website (Here) and vote for wait…wait…here comes the spoiler…”Kevin McCarthy”. Looks like I’ve now been officially outed. Please vote early and often as the contest ends on Saturday, December 11th at 11:59pm EST. I would truly appreciate your help and if you really want to be of assistance, please encourage your family and friends to vote also, too!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Strangers In The Night song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDA33hGFNgQ&feature=related

STRANGE ONES ON THE RIGHT

(sung to the Frank Sinatra song “Strangers In The Night”)

Strange ones on the right,
Fox News romancers
Not so very bright,
With our finances
This Tea Party love
Should be viewed as taboo

Palin shouting lies
And fear inciting
Rand Paul is hostile
And so damn frightening
Boehner has no heart
McConnell has no clue

Strange ones on the right,
Abnormal people
They are strange ones on the right
Not one sane moment
They should be in a freak-show
Little do they know
It would just enhance our day
If like Bristol they’d dance away and –

On Fox every night,
They’re all together
Lovers on the right
In love forever
It’s an ugly sight
Those strange ones on the right

(witchcraft break)

Don’t look now just glance away
Here comes their jailbird Tom Delay

You can join their fight
And hang together
Only if you’re white
Birds of a feather
Taking their last flight
Those strange ones on the right

Newt Gingrich Is A Rotten, Stinking Liar

Remember when all the “serious” conservatives belittled President Barack Obama’s appearance on the “The View” last month? They said that an appearance on such a show demeaned the Presidency. Just wondering, but does the appearance on such a show demean a prospective presidential candidate? If so, then Limbaugh, Coulter, Malkin and all the talking heads at Fox News better start criticizing Newt Gingrich.

The philandering and disgraced former Republican Speaker of the House and potential G.O.P. presidential candidate appeared with Barbara, Whoopi and Co. on Tuesday morning. As soon as he took his position at the coffee table, he immediately began lying and misleading the show’s hosts and audience. The man who recently proclaimed that President Obama’s administration “represents as great a threat to America as Nazi Germany or the Soviet Union once did”, and overtly criticisized then candidate Obama’s 2008 trip and speech in Germany, now appears to idolize all things German. He especially loves the German health care system.

Gingrich vomited a diatribe on what a truly great nation Germany is and why the United States should emulate its policies. How’s that for “American exceptionalism” and patriotism? What would Gingrich and the Republicans have to say if a Democrat expressed that opinion? When one of the show’s hosts agreed with him and then questioned if whether Germany’s universal health care system should also be applauded, Gingrich started with the lies and misinformation.

To begin, he claimed that Germany has a private health care system which is run by over 350 private insurance companies with minimal government funding, supervision or regulatory authority. He then lied by saying that German citizens privately purchase their own health care insurance policies from these private insurers and that they can change their plans and providers whenever they choose. In essence, Gingrich stated that Germany’s health care system is even more privatized than the American system was prior to this year’s health care reform legislation. In the words of Stephen Colbert, Gingrich’s characterization of Germany’s health care system was devoid of “truthiness”.

The truth is, that Germany has Europe’s oldest universal health care system which dates back to 1883 with changes made thereafter. Currently 85% of the population is covered by a basic health insurance plan provided by statute, which provides a standard level of coverage. The remainder opt for private health insurance, which frequently offers additional benefits. According to the World Health Organization, Germany’s health care system is 77% government-funded and 23% privately funded. Additionally, the government partially reimburses the costs for low-wage workers, whose premiums are capped at a predetermined value. Higher wage earners pay a premium based on their salary. Those higher earners may also opt for private insurance, which is generally more expensive, but whose price may vary based on the individual’s health status.

Germany has a universal multi-payer system with two main types of health insurance, public and private.

Public Insurance

All salaried employees must have a public health insurance. Only public officers, self-employed people and employees with a large income above c. €50,000 (adjusted yearly) may join the private system.

In the public system the premium

  • is set by the Federal Ministry of Health based on a fixed set of covered services as described in the German Social Law (Sozialgesetzbuch – SGB), which limits those services to “economically viable, sufficient, necessary and meaningful services”
  • is not dependent on an individual’s health condition, but a percentage of salaried income (typically 10-15%, depending on the public health insurance company one is in, where half of that is paid by the employer)
  • includes family members of any family members, or “registered member” ( Familienversicherung – i.e. husband/wife and children are free)
  • is a “pay as you go” system – there is no saving for an individual’s higher health costs with rising age or existing conditions.

Private Insurance

In the private system the premium

  • is based on an individual agreement between the insurance company and the individual defining the set of covered services and the percentage of coverage
  • depends on the amount of services chosen and the individual risk and entrance age into the private system
  • is used to build up savings for the rising health costs at higher age (required by law)

A person that opts out of the public health insurance system and gets private health insurance can not go back later to the public system, even if income drops below the level required for private selection. Since private health insurance is usually more expensive than public health insurance one will be required to pay the higher premiums with less income.

In short, the German health care system is much closer to a full government funded and strictly government regulated system than is the health care system in the United States even subsequent to the passage of the health care reform act this year. Newt Gingrich however, does not want you to know this. The reason? Because he will lie and misinform whenever he believes that it will further his failed conservative agenda. It is unfortunate that none of the more liberal hosts of “The View” had a better understanding of the German system so as to call Gingrich on his lies. Indeed, even the conservative Elisabeth Hasselbeck was out of her league on the topic as evidenced by her only question to Gingrich which was, “Are you a FaceBook friend of Sarah Palin?” Shallow is as shallow does!

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s parody.

The Grinch That Stole Christmas song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPBS7dVrE1U

YOU’RE A HAS-BEEN, NEWT GINGRICH

(sung to the Dr. Seuss song “The Grinch That Stole Christmas”)

You’re a has-been, Newt Gingrich
You’re lacking in appeal
Your were ousted as The Speaker
No one wants to hear you squeal
Newt Gingrich

You’re a unicycle
Without even one wheel

You’ve had three wives, Newt Gingrich
A mistress in the hole
Philandering’s your day job
You’re a slimy ugly troll
Newt Gingich

These woman that like you, must
Be on work-release or parole

You’re a vile one, Newt Gingrich
Your words reek with rancid bile
Your criticizing ol’ Bill Clinton
As you’re cheating all the while
Newt Gingrich

There couldn’t be a bigger hypocrite
Within a Midwest country mile

You’re a foul one, Newt Gingrich
Your first divorce smelled of skunk
Your wife, Jackie fighting cancer
You told her she was junk
Newt Gingrich

The nicest words to describe you,
Are, as follows, and I quote, Pink. Wank, Punk

You’re a coward, Newt Gingrich
Avoided your army spot
Deferment-seeking chicken-hawk
That likes to talk real tough
Newt Gingrich

Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing
With the most disgraceful assortment of Republican
Sound-bytes imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots

You’re the racist, Newt Gingrich
It’s not Judge Sotomayor
You play the race card as a white guy
That’s so laughable I’m sure
Newt Gingrich

You’re a stinking pile of vomit
Sitting in the sun
With feces on top

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 57

Just a few newsworthy events (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS: Why does the US Chamber of Commerce hate America? Presently, the Chamber is hosting seminars with Chinese government officials to teach American businesses how to outsource jobs. How patriotic.

THIS JUST IN:  Tea Partiers are very stupid people. Don’t believe it? Watch this:

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “People That Make You Feel Uncomfortable” features Joe Miller. The Alaska G.O.P. Senate candidate and Tea Partier was not missed when he left at least one law firm. After graduating from Yale Law School in 1995, Miller moved to Anchorage to take a job as an associate at the firm then known as Condon Partnow & Sharrock. Attorney David Shoup (Miller’s supervisor) told Salon.com, “We at this firm were not eager to have him stay, and so when he announced he was leaving, we were relieved.” When Miller announces that he is leaving Alaska the residents of that state will also be relieved.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “What’s Up With That” features Sharron Angle. The moonbat-crazy Tea Party candidate for a Nevada Senate seat was speaking before an audience of Hispanic school children last week when she said, “Some of you look a little more Asian to me.” Vote for Harry Reid.

BREAKING NEWS: Politico reports, “The election is two weeks away, but the campaign trail reviews of Sarah Palin already are in, and they aren’t pretty. According to multiple Republican campaign sources, the former Alaska governor wreaks havoc on campaign logistics and planning. She offers little notice about her availability, refuses to do certain events, is obsessive about press coverage and sometimes backs out with as little lead time as she gave in the first place.” Politico mind you, is the voice of the Republican establishment. If that is how mainstream Republicans feel about the Queen of Quit, imagine how the rest of America feels.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “That Was Awkward” features Virginia Thomas. The wife of Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas left a voicemail message on the telephone of Anita Hill, asking her to say she was sorry for the allegations of sexual harassment that surfaced at Thomas’ confirmation hearings for a seat on the high court bench in 1991. Hill’s response? “I certainly thought the call was inappropriate. I have no intention of apologizing because I testified truthfully about my experience and I stand by that testimony.” Just wondering, but was this a case of drunk-dialing? come on now, you know what I mean.

BREAKING NEWS: The Tea Party Express spent $ 103,000.00 this summer to send six staffers on luxury cruises to Alaska during Teapublican Joe Miller’s Senate primary campaign. Mind you, the allegedly grassroots Tea Party movement prides itself on its principles of strict financial accountability.

THIS JUST IN: Speaking of the Tea Party Express, the wagon-train full of illiterate, racist anarchists will be pulling into Abilene and Waco, Texas today. The group is trying to get as far away as possible from Joe Miller and Alaska. The group had declared that it would do whatever it takes for Miller, but since the primary election, they have spent less than $ 11,000.00 on his behalf. How’s that for Teapublicans eating their young?

BREAKING NEWS: Is it just Lynnrockets, or is anybody else out there hoping that the Fox Network blackout on Cablevision continues forever? Fox executives have managed to silence themselves in a much better fashion than all of our boycotts. Way to go, guys!

THIS JUST IN:  Harry Reid had this to say about Sharron Angle during an MSNBC interview last Thursday, “She is extreme, she is dangerous, and embarrassing to the state of Nevada.” How do you like them apples, Sharron?

BREAKING NEWS: We haven’t heard much from Michelle Malkin since so many of her Teapublican conservatives have been calling for “anchor babies” to be stripped of their citizenship. The reason for her silence? Well as it turns out, Malkin is one of those “anchor babies”. But just last week Malkin reared her head into US airspace and lied about Pennsylvania’s Democratic candidate for US Senate. She said, “Look, you can’t finesse the truth. Joe Sestak voted for Obamacare. Obamacare in essence and essentially bottom line gives taxpayer dollars to abortions. Joe Sestak voted for taxpayer-funded abortions. Period.”

Truth be told, the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act, which Sestak supported, does not provide for federal funding for abortions beyond what is allowed under existing law. Under the Hyde amendment, first passed in 1976, taxpayer dollars can only be used for abortion procedures in cases of rape, incest, or when the mother’s life is in danger. consequently, Sestak’s vote in favor of the bill did nothing to advance taxpayer funding of abortions.

 

GO PACKERS!!!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s Halloween inspired song parody.

The Monster Mash song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FeZftK2kO6U

THE MALKIN MASH

(sung to the Bobby “Boris” Pickett song “Monster Mash”)

She was mouthing off with gab late one night
Malkin’s strange visage, an eerie sight
My blood pressure and pulse both began to rise
What’s up with that weird lazy eye?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

She was ruminating on Obama’s speech
When her logic and her brains went to the beach
We knew she was lying by her growing nose
Inside her skull, a mighty wind blows

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Dear Malkin was having fun
Her air-time had just begun
It was quite apparent that
Michelle had come undone

The show was rockin’ with her babbling sounds
Michelle spewing sentences without nouns
There were blood-shot lines in her crazy ass eyes
One thing missing was the strait-jacket guys

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Out from the closet came the Coulter thing
He was wearing his decoder ring
Waving it round because he was pissed
Have you ever seen so much hair on anybody’s fist?

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Now everything’s cool, Coulter hid his big hand
And Malkin’s diatribe was critically panned
It was one giant laugh if it was viewed
Next time we see that jerk, she is sure to be booed.

She’s talkin’ trash
She did the Malkin mash
The Malkin mash
I think she has a rash
She does the mash
She must be smokin’ hash
She does the mash
She did the Malkin mash

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 54

Just a few newsworthy events (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Do As I Say, Not As I Do” features California’s Republican gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman. It has been revealed that the “get tough on illegal immigration” candidate employed an undocumented illegal housekeeper for some nine years. The worker has also claimed that Whitman treated her poorly much of that time. it will be fun to see Whitman try to dig herself out of this one.

THIS JUST IN: Garrison Keillor says Republican Congresswoman Michele Bachmann, “embarrassing to me and a great many Minnesotans”. Good for you and all the citizens of Lake Wobegon, Mr. Keillor.

BREAKING NEWS: Republican Senate candidate and World Wrestling Entertainment CEO Linda McMahon (CT) this week stated that she believes Congress should consider lowering the minimum wage. When questioned by reporters as to what her state’s minimum wage is however, she was forced to admit that she did not know the answer. She then said that she “was just not going to comment any more on the subject. McMahon is just another example of an angry but uninformed Republican.

THIS JUST IN: As for Republican/Tea Party Delaware Senate candidate Christine O’Donnell, the OstroyReport says, “She’s scarcer than an Osama bin Laden video. Harder to find than Waldo. The burning question in Delaware these days is, “Where’s Christine?” As the NY Times reported Thursday, the state’s cracked-Tea-Pot Senate candidate, Christine O’Donnell, is apparently in hiding. And why not? She’s terrified of opening her mouth in public. I guess those grass roots have rotted.” “Nuff said.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Republicans Hurting the Country” features, you guessed it, the US Senate Republicans. On Sept. 30, the TANF Emergency Contingency Fund (TEF) — considered one of the most successful stimulus programs, having created 250,000 jobs for previously unemployed workers — expires. The Obama administration and Democrats had requested $1.5 to $2.5 billion to keep it going for another year. The House has passed two extenders, but yesterday, legislation failed again in the Senate because of Republican opposition. That means employers are now faced with laying off the TEF workers, as many as 100,000 into an economy that already has 14.9 million unemployed.

THIS JUST IN: Never mind that Republican New York gubernatorial candidate Carl Paladino has a taste for racist emails, a desire to put welfare recipients into prison dorms and teach them “personal hygiene… the personal things they don’t get when they come from dysfunctional homes.” Just last week he threatened to “take out” a New York Post reporter. Does that sound like a criminal threat to anybody else?

BREAKING NEWS: Cable news ratings for the third quarter reveal that FOX NEWS’ ratings have fallen 21% in total viewers – and 26% for younger viewers. To add insult to injury, MSNBC‘s audience is growing. Does this mean that Americans are waking up?

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Whatever Happened To … ?” features Ann “The Man” Coulter and Michelle “Anchor Baby” Malkin. Has anybody seen or heard from the Coulter guy or Malkin in the last number of Months? Is it time to put their pictures on a milk carton?

BREAKING NEWS: Bill Mahar did us a solid on Friday night when he released his newest embarrassing clip of Republican/Tea Partier, Christine O’Donnell. In this clip O’Donnell is revealed as being amenable to any religion which includes her eating habits. The clip shows her admitting, “I would have become a Hare Krishna, but I didn’t want to become a vegetarian. And that is honestly the reason why, because I’m Italian and I love meatballs.” So, forget spirituality, it is the menu that is important when it comes to worship in the mind of Christine. Also, just wondering, but isn’t O’Donnell an awfully Irish sounding Italian name?

Well, until next week…

GO PACKERS!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Fox On The Run song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MDCbIhTa_w

FOX ON THE RUN

(sung to the Sweet song “Fox On The Run”)

Why is that network insane
No one there has a brain
So easy to abhor
Each day they add a new pretty face
But they’re losing in the gene pool race
They speak like sidewalk whores

Fox on the run
They scream and everybody starts a-running
Beck, Britt Hume and big Bill O’Reilly
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.

Koo-Koo, that is the Fox network brand
As “fair and balanced” as DisneyLand
So easy to ignore
News, that is so God damned lame
Should hide their heads in shame
And show their hosts the door

Fox on the run
They scream and everybody starts a-running
Beck, Britt Hume and big Bill O’Reilly
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.

(musical interlude)

F-foxy, Fox is on the run
They scream and think that we’re having fun
Take a run and hide yourself away
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.

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