Category Archives: Elisabeth Hasselbeck

Newt Gingrich Is A Rotten, Stinking Liar

Remember when all the “serious” conservatives belittled President Barack Obama’s appearance on the “The View” last month? They said that an appearance on such a show demeaned the Presidency. Just wondering, but does the appearance on such a show demean a prospective presidential candidate? If so, then Limbaugh, Coulter, Malkin and all the talking heads at Fox News better start criticizing Newt Gingrich.

The philandering and disgraced former Republican Speaker of the House and potential G.O.P. presidential candidate appeared with Barbara, Whoopi and Co. on Tuesday morning. As soon as he took his position at the coffee table, he immediately began lying and misleading the show’s hosts and audience. The man who recently proclaimed that President Obama’s administration “represents as great a threat to America as Nazi Germany or the Soviet Union once did”, and overtly criticisized then candidate Obama’s 2008 trip and speech in Germany, now appears to idolize all things German. He especially loves the German health care system.

Gingrich vomited a diatribe on what a truly great nation Germany is and why the United States should emulate its policies. How’s that for “American exceptionalism” and patriotism? What would Gingrich and the Republicans have to say if a Democrat expressed that opinion? When one of the show’s hosts agreed with him and then questioned if whether Germany’s universal health care system should also be applauded, Gingrich started with the lies and misinformation.

To begin, he claimed that Germany has a private health care system which is run by over 350 private insurance companies with minimal government funding, supervision or regulatory authority. He then lied by saying that German citizens privately purchase their own health care insurance policies from these private insurers and that they can change their plans and providers whenever they choose. In essence, Gingrich stated that Germany’s health care system is even more privatized than the American system was prior to this year’s health care reform legislation. In the words of Stephen Colbert, Gingrich’s characterization of Germany’s health care system was devoid of “truthiness”.

The truth is, that Germany has Europe’s oldest universal health care system which dates back to 1883 with changes made thereafter. Currently 85% of the population is covered by a basic health insurance plan provided by statute, which provides a standard level of coverage. The remainder opt for private health insurance, which frequently offers additional benefits. According to the World Health Organization, Germany’s health care system is 77% government-funded and 23% privately funded. Additionally, the government partially reimburses the costs for low-wage workers, whose premiums are capped at a predetermined value. Higher wage earners pay a premium based on their salary. Those higher earners may also opt for private insurance, which is generally more expensive, but whose price may vary based on the individual’s health status.

Germany has a universal multi-payer system with two main types of health insurance, public and private.

Public Insurance

All salaried employees must have a public health insurance. Only public officers, self-employed people and employees with a large income above c. €50,000 (adjusted yearly) may join the private system.

In the public system the premium

  • is set by the Federal Ministry of Health based on a fixed set of covered services as described in the German Social Law (Sozialgesetzbuch – SGB), which limits those services to “economically viable, sufficient, necessary and meaningful services”
  • is not dependent on an individual’s health condition, but a percentage of salaried income (typically 10-15%, depending on the public health insurance company one is in, where half of that is paid by the employer)
  • includes family members of any family members, or “registered member” ( Familienversicherung – i.e. husband/wife and children are free)
  • is a “pay as you go” system – there is no saving for an individual’s higher health costs with rising age or existing conditions.

Private Insurance

In the private system the premium

  • is based on an individual agreement between the insurance company and the individual defining the set of covered services and the percentage of coverage
  • depends on the amount of services chosen and the individual risk and entrance age into the private system
  • is used to build up savings for the rising health costs at higher age (required by law)

A person that opts out of the public health insurance system and gets private health insurance can not go back later to the public system, even if income drops below the level required for private selection. Since private health insurance is usually more expensive than public health insurance one will be required to pay the higher premiums with less income.

In short, the German health care system is much closer to a full government funded and strictly government regulated system than is the health care system in the United States even subsequent to the passage of the health care reform act this year. Newt Gingrich however, does not want you to know this. The reason? Because he will lie and misinform whenever he believes that it will further his failed conservative agenda. It is unfortunate that none of the more liberal hosts of “The View” had a better understanding of the German system so as to call Gingrich on his lies. Indeed, even the conservative Elisabeth Hasselbeck was out of her league on the topic as evidenced by her only question to Gingrich which was, “Are you a FaceBook friend of Sarah Palin?” Shallow is as shallow does!

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s parody.

The Grinch That Stole Christmas song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPBS7dVrE1U

YOU’RE A HAS-BEEN, NEWT GINGRICH

(sung to the Dr. Seuss song “The Grinch That Stole Christmas”)

You’re a has-been, Newt Gingrich
You’re lacking in appeal
Your were ousted as The Speaker
No one wants to hear you squeal
Newt Gingrich

You’re a unicycle
Without even one wheel

You’ve had three wives, Newt Gingrich
A mistress in the hole
Philandering’s your day job
You’re a slimy ugly troll
Newt Gingich

These woman that like you, must
Be on work-release or parole

You’re a vile one, Newt Gingrich
Your words reek with rancid bile
Your criticizing ol’ Bill Clinton
As you’re cheating all the while
Newt Gingrich

There couldn’t be a bigger hypocrite
Within a Midwest country mile

You’re a foul one, Newt Gingrich
Your first divorce smelled of skunk
Your wife, Jackie fighting cancer
You told her she was junk
Newt Gingrich

The nicest words to describe you,
Are, as follows, and I quote, Pink. Wank, Punk

You’re a coward, Newt Gingrich
Avoided your army spot
Deferment-seeking chicken-hawk
That likes to talk real tough
Newt Gingrich

Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing
With the most disgraceful assortment of Republican
Sound-bytes imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots

You’re the racist, Newt Gingrich
It’s not Judge Sotomayor
You play the race card as a white guy
That’s so laughable I’m sure
Newt Gingrich

You’re a stinking pile of vomit
Sitting in the sun
With feces on top

Glenn Beck Has A Dream Too!

Most of you are by now aware that Fox News’ Glenn Beck plans to lead a rally which he calls “Restoring Honor” on the steps of the Lincoln Memorial on the 47th anniversary of The march on Washington and at the place where the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. gave his landmark “I Have a Dream” speech. To what end? Well, Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off has found a terrific blog post which seems to put things in perspective. Most of this enlightening post is found below, but please read the whole thing (as well as the other insightful posts) at Nadra’s Race Relations Blog.

“Beck says the purpose of the rally is to celebrate “upstanding citizens who embody our nation’s founding principles of integrity, truth and honor,” New America Media reports. Sounds like an honorable event, right? There’s just one problem, civil rights activists aren’t buying that the rally will be used to raise awareness about the poor and oppressed. Perhaps that’s because the reported aim of the rally is to “take our country back.” Read the rest of this entry

Sunday Mid-Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 45

Just a few newsworthy events and comments thereon that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Fright on The Right” features the multitude of violent conservative right-wing crazies that have telephoned or emailed threats of harm to Federal Judge, Susan Bolton as the result of her ruling to issue a preliminary injunction against most of the provisions of Arizona’s racist immigration law. The right is simply comprised of sore losers. Rather than accept the loss at the District Court level and move the case peacefully through the appellate process, the right wingers resort to what they do best: talk about armed insurrections and violence to peaceful individuals. How predictable.

THIS JUST IN: It was nice to see a Democrat call out the hypocritical Republicans on the House floor last week. Congressman Anthony Weiner of New York took to the House floor to denounce the GOP for using parliamentary tactics to try and prevent a fund for the health of 9/11 responders from being established. The G.O.P. will do anything to oppose Democrats, even if that means turning against the victims of the 9/11 tragedy. Let’s go to the film:

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Don’t Mess With The Blue Hairs” features Nevada’s Republican candidate for US Senate, the deranged Sharron Angle. Angle says, “We need to phase out Medicare and Social Security in favor of something privatized.” The Nevada chapter of the Alliance for Retired Americans, a national organization of retired union members says otherwise: “It’s a big concern for us. Seniors can’t afford Sharron Angle in the Senate, simple as that.” The message to Sharron Angle? Be careful because senior citizens in Nevada are many and they vote.

THIS JUST IN: Senator Ben Nelson of Nebraska will become the first (and probably only) Democrat to vote against the nomination of Elena Kagan as Justice of the Supreme Court. Nelson says, “(I) have heard concerns from Nebraskans regarding Ms. Kagan, and her lack of a judicial record makes it difficult for me to discount the concerns raised by Nebraskans, or to reach a level of comfort that these concerns are unfounded.” Nelson didn’t however, outline what those worries were and Kagan is certain to win the seat. This is the same jerk that voted against the Health Care Reform Law. Nelson is also anti-choice and defends the Defense of Marriage Act. Why doesn’t he just end the charade and switch parties?

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Don’t Make Me Laugh” features Republican US Senator from Louisiana, David “Diapers” Vitter. Notwithstanding his 2007 prostitute (and diaper wearing) scandal and a more recent controversy surrounding his retention of a top aide who attacked his girlfriend with a knife, Sen. David Vitter (R-LA) is seeking the endorsement of the Louisiana Sheriffs’ Association. Talk about the fox guarding the whorehouse, oops we meant henhouse!

THIS JUST IN: Republican Texas governor Rick Perry lives in an alternative universe where truth is fiction and fiction is fact. On a radio program this week, Perry proclaimed that Texas “has the best health care in the country.” However, the truth is that while Texas’ health care system might work well for those who can afford to use its “fabulous” facilities, the state also has the highest rate of uninsured residents of any state in the country. Nearly 26 percent of Texans lack coverage — the national average is just 15.4 percent — meaning there are more uninsured residents in Texas than there are people in 33 states. If Perry follows through on his threat to secede from the United States he will be vindicated because Texas will then have “the best health care in the nation of Texas”!

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Take That!” features Shirley Sherrod who announced this week that she will file a defamation lawsuit against serial liar Andrew Breitbart for his publication of a doctored videotape of one of her speeches. Breitbart will soon learn how it feels to be on the defensive.

THIS JUST IN: Let’s end today’s post by watching President Barack Obama slap down The View‘s Elisabeth Hasselbeck with a fact-based, yet polite, retort to her question about job creation. The best part is when the audience shows its agreement with the President’s view by means of its loud applause. Please click on the link (Here) to see the video.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

American Woman song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=leSdvfYcDw0

REPUBLICAN WOMEN

(sung to the Guess Who song “American Woman”)

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women, they’ve really lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Say “R”, say “E”, say “P”
Say “L”, say “I”, say “C”
Say “A” “N”

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Republican women, stay away from me
Republican women, from the G.O.P.
You are someone I’ll just ignore
I don’t wanna see your face no more
I got more important things to do
And I will never be sold on you

Now women, I said stay away

Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, have no dignity
Republican women, and their tea-parties
Like I told you the time before
Michele Bachmann is just a bore
Mann Coulter I do despise
Malkin has a lazy eye
Now women, I said get away
Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, it’s clear as day
Republican women, they’re no Tina Fey
Talk about defending our shores
Their husbands prefer time with whores
Jean Schmidt always makes a scene
Sarah Palin thinks she’s queen
Mary Matalin’s hypnotized
Ingraham’s mouth is super-sized
Now women, from the G.O.P.
Republican women, mama let me be

Go, gotta get away, gotta get away
Now go go go
Gonna leave you, women
Gonna leave you, women
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
You’re no good for me
I’m no good for you
Gonna look you right in the eye.
Tell you what I’m gonna do
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go, women
I’m gonna leave, women
Goodbye, Republican women

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 44

Just a few newsworthy events and comments thereon that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “The Dixie Dregs” features Zach Wamp (yes, that is a real name), one of the G.O.P. candidates for Governor of Tennessee. Like Texas’ crazy Rick Perry, Wamp would like Tennessee to secede from the United States of America. Wamp says, that mandates forced on the states by the Obama administration’s health care bill have put secession on the table. “I hope that the American people will go to the ballot box in 2010 and 2012 so that states are not forced to consider separation from this government.” Putting aside for the moment, the fact that secession is treason, just imagine the federal government benefit dependent state of Tennessee trying to govern itself autonomously with the likes of “Stonewall” Wamp at the helm.

THIS JUST IN: Disgraced Tea Party Express spokesman and former chairman Mark Williams has resigned his post. The National Tea Party Federation, an organization that seeks to represent the Tea Party political movement around the country, expelled Williams and his Tea Party Express organization because of a racist blog entry authored by Williams last week. This is just another example of truth trumping fiction because the NAACP’s call for the Tea Party to denounce (or as Sarah Palin would say, “refudiate”) the racist elements of its movement were fact based whereas FOX News’ allegations of Shirley Sherrod’s racism were fabricated. Consequently, Sherrod now has been cleared for return to her position while Williams is now unemployed.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Birth Of A Fiction” features Kansas Republican congressional candidate Tracey Mann. Twice in the span of 30 days, this crackpot called on President Obama to come forward with proof of his American citizenship. His status as a “Birther” however, has cost Mann’s campaign an important endorsement. As the result of Mann’s discredited view on the President’s citizenship, the Hutchinson News emphatically withdrew its endorsement of him.

The reason [for withdrawing the endorsement] is that it turns out Mann is what is known as a birther,” the newspaper’s editorial board wrote Wednesday night. “He questions the citizenship of President Barack Obama despite evidence that is irrefutable to most objective, rational people – including a birth certificate released by the Hawaii secretary of state and birth announcements printed in Honolulu’s two major newspapers.

So long Tracey Mann, we hardly knew ye.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “The Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World of Michele Bachmann” features none other than Michele Bachmann, the moonbat crazy Republican  from Minnesota. When U.S. Rep. Michele Bachmann announced Wednesday the names of House members that had joined her House Tea Party Caucus, it left some congressmen scratching their heads. Many hadn’t actually signed up to be members, and the list put out by Bachmann was quickly removed from her website. The Frum Forum, a website by conservative commentator David Frum, contacted ‘members’ of the Tea Party Caucus, and many indicated they were surprised to know they had joined and others were under the impression that the list of members wouldn’t be released. Do I hear a tea kettle whistling or is that just the sound of Bachmann’s poor excuse for a brain boiling over?

BREAKING NEWS: Windycitywatch.com reports, “while the rest of America understands that Shirley Sherrod was the victim of an attempted media lynching THE VIEW’s Elisabeth Hasselbeck, most likely reading from a script provided by Sean Hannity, went on the attack. First she took issue with Sherrod stating her belief that some of the Republican opposition to Obama’s health care plan was racist, then she questioned whether or not she violated the Hatch Act. Sherrod wasn’t having it, at one point looking at her like she was a simple idiot before putting her in her place with a strong response.” The best part of the segment was when the audience loudly applauded each fact which contradicted the conservative Hasselbeck. Let’s go to the video…

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Despicable Me” features conservative pundit Ann “The Man” Coulter. He appeared on Sean Hannity’s program and defended Andrew Breitbart (the conservative blogger that posted the doctored video tape of Shriley Sherrod) by claiming that he was the victim of a scheme in which he was framed! Watch this…

Coulter is a racist apologist. This guy will do anything he can to defend Breitbart. In Coulter’s world, it was not Breitbart’s obligation to fact check his source or the doctored video before publishing it. Rather, he contends, only the source should be criticized. It is clear at this point that every time Coulter opens his mouth, he is being disingenuous.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along to the song parody.

I Wanna Be Sedated song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_rxJroWIg1Y

ANN WANTS TO BE CASTRATED

(sung to the Ramones song “I Wanna Be Sedated”)

Twenty-twenty-twenty Mann-hours to go, Ann wants to be castrated
Nice new hairdo and nothing that show-o-ohs, his sex can be debated
Get Coulter to the airport and put him on a plane
Hurry, hurry, hurry the surgery’s in Spain
He only wants ten fingers and a woman’s brain
Oh no no no no no

Twenty-twenty-twenty Mann hours to go, Ann wants to be castrated
Nice new hairdo and nothing that show-o-ohs ,his sex can be debated
Just slather his legs with Nair then he’ll be a dame
Hurry, hurry, hurry before he goes insane
He looks a lot like Klinger isn’t that a shame?
Oh no no no no no

Twenty-twenty-twenty Mann-hours to go till his breasts are inflated
Get some new shoes, Ann’s ready to go-o-o, the change has been belated
Put Coulter in that wheelchair, let’s begin the show
Hurry, hurry, hurry before it starts to grow
He wants some girlie sneakers and new Ann Taylor clothes
Oh no no no no no

Twenty-twenty-twenty Mann hours to go, Ann wants to be castrated
Boobs that are new and sheer nylon hose, Ann wants to be castrated
Just put Ann in a wheelchair, let’s begin the show
Hurry, hurry, hurry he wants to be a ‘ho
Trinkets on his fingers and trinkets on his toes
Oh no no no no no

Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba Ann wants to be castrated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba Ann wants to be castrated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba Ann wants to be castrated
Ba-ba-bamp-ba ba-ba-ba-bamp-ba Ann wants to be castrated

Palin’s Boobs Were Made For Talkin’

Sarah Palin's Oil Spill Solution.

Poor Sarah Palin. She made a boob of herself yet again last night. When the former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska agreed to appear on The O’Reilly Factor last night to critique the President’s address about the BP oil spill, she apparently expected the usual fawning treatment she always receives when on the Fox network. Such was not the case. Host Bill O’Reilly actually went on the attack. Newshounds showed us that he repeatedly challenged her non-fact based assertions and then demolished her credibility altogether by asking what she would do to stop the leak. Not only couldn’t Palin answer the question, she also made the ridiculous statement that Norwegians are experts at dikes.

It is a pleasure to watch Palin silently stare in red faced ignorance when Bill O’Reilly asked “What is your solution, here, Governor? What would you do tonight – tell the nation tonight, what you would have said, the main point in that speech. Go.” Palin’s hilariously superficial answer? “Stopping the gusher, that’s the number one priority of the nation.” This woman truly is a boob. Her plan for stopping the gusher is stopping the gusher! How insightful!

O’Reilly then pushed her harder. He said, “BP says, ‘We don’t know how to stop the leak.’ …Obama obviously doesn’t know how to stop the leak. Do you know how to stop it?” Of course Palin has no idea how to stop the leak, but rather than admit her ignorance, she said Obama must accept “the assistance from foreign countries” such as “The Dutch, they are known and the Norwegians. They are known for dikes and for cleaning up water.”

So that is Sarah Palin’s solution. Call the Netherlands and have them send over The Little Dutch Boy to stick his finger in the oil well. Stop it Sarah, you’re killing us!!! But let’s watch the video anyway…

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

These Boots Were Made For Walking song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ow1l8ymXlm4

THESE BOOBS WERE MADE FOR TALKING

(sung to the Nancy Sinatra song “These Boots Were Made For Walking”)

Beck keeps saying Obama’s a commie
Hannity has Tea-Bagger guests
Bill O’s guessin’ he’s teachin’ a right-wing lesson
And now Sarah Palin’s sportin’ brand new breasts

These boobs were made for talkin’ and that’s just what they do
One of those right-wing boobs can be seen daily on The View

Yeah

Coulter’s lyin’ when he oughta be truthin’
Rush said he’s leavin’ in protest on his jet
Malkin’s blamin’ when she oughta be shamin’
Now what’s right is right but they ain’t been right yet

These boobs were made for talkin’ and that’s just what they do
But none of these right-wing talking heads even has a clue

They keep sayin’ that they are only playin’
Every time they’re lyin’ and then they get burnt
Ha! They turn red like the heads on top of matches, yeah
Still, what we know they ain’t had time to learn

These boobs were made for talkin’ and that’s just what they do
But none of these right-wing talking heads even has a clue

Are you ready boobs?
Keep talkin’

Sump Pumps And Sarah Palin Both Suck

First she appeared before the Bowling League Convention. Next it was the Liquor Wholesalers’ Convention and Wednesday Sarah Palin spoke at an event sponsored by a firm that specializes in the manufacture of battery backup sump pump systems. Really, can it get any better than this? What is next, the Toilet Scrubber Convention?

We will not even get into the content of her speech. Suffice to say it included the words, “rogue”, “hope-y change-y”, “clinging to guns and religion”, “socialism”, “Obama Care” and a completely inane diatribe having something to do with a girls’ high school basketball team and the new Arizona racist immigrant law. You know, the usual Palin word salad.

This is a beautiful Saturday here in Boston, so let’s just pull out one of our old Sarah Palin television theme parodies.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song.

Gilligan’s Island theme link: http://www.televisiontunes.com/Gilligans_Island.html

SARAH’S ISLAND

(Sung to the theme of tv’s “Gilligan’s Island”)

Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale
A tale of a strange kinship
That started with the First Dude, Todd
And ends with Baby Tripp

Wife Sarah was Alaska’s guv’nor
Her husband a drop-out
Five children with really strange names
Hillbillies there’s no doubt.    Hillbillies there’s no doubt.

The election started getting rough
Mack needed a V.P.
He focused his attention on the Great White North
His savior Sarah P.    His savior Sarah P.

She could not handle interviews her strategy was
Senile
Too “Mavericky”
“You Betcha’s” too
“Joes Sixpack and the Plumber”
“Hockey Moms”
“The Pitbull with Lipstick on”
and, a Beehive hairstyle.

So this is the tale of the Palin Clan
The campaign was reduced to dust
Bristol had a baby boy
Levi’s mom, a bust

Sarah and her husband, Todd
Returned to the family nest
She had some softball interviews
Tough issues weren’t addressed

No Charles, no Kate, no CNN
Sure no M-S-N-B-C
They all use “Gotcha Questions”
That’s not her cup of tea

So join them here each week good friends
Fox, you can stay awhile
Greta and Hasselback will be here too

Here on “Palins Isle”

Mother’s Day Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 36

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you that may be mothers. For the rest of you, please do something nice for your own mothers on her special day. You have no way of knowing how many more of these days you will have the opportunity to share together. Make the most of all of them.

OK, no more proselytizing. Let’s have some fun. Rather than the usual recap of newsworthy events from the last week, today’s post will provide a list of appropriate Mother’s Day gifts for a bunch of well known conservative women. Please feel free to add to the list in the comment section. Let’s roll…

Barbara Bush:  A “do over” regarding son George W.

Ann Coulter: A definitive male or female sexual status.

Carrie Jean Prejean:  A map of the United States.

Condoleezza Rice: A “Where’s Condi?” placemat.

Michelle Malkin:  Non-”Anchor-Baby” status.

Ohio Rep. Jean Schmidt:  An official “Birther” T-shirt.

Laura Bush: A Stepford Sister.

Conservative radio pundit Laura Ingraham: A more feminine voice.

Congressional candidate Carly Fiorina: An endorsement from Hewlett Packard directors and shareholders.

Greta Van Susteren:  A contestant’s spot on tv’s Extreme Makeover.

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer:  An all expenses paid trip to Mexico.

Liz Cheney:  A chance to show her courage via a stint in the U.S. Army.

Michele Bachmann:  An unlimited prescription of Thorazine.

Elizabeth Hasselbeck:  Employment with Fox News.

Bristol Palin:  A time machine.

Sarah Palin: An English/Palin – Palin/ English dictionary.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

American Woman song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9o8SUSy_tY

REPUBLICAN WOMEN

(sung to the Guess Who song “American Woman”)

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women, they’ve really lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Say “R”, say “E”, say “P”
Say “L”, say “I”, say “C”
Say “A” “N”

Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds
Republican women they’ve all lost their minds

Republican women, stay away from me
Republican women, from the G.O.P.
You are someone I’ll just ignore
I don’t wanna see your face no more
I got more important things to do
And I will never be sold on you

Now women, I said stay away

Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, have no dignity
Republican women, and their tea-parties
Like I told you the time before
Michele Bachmann is just a bore
Mann Coulter I do despise
Malkin has a lazy eye
Now women, I said get away
Republican women, listen what I say

Republican women, it’s clear as day
Republican women, they’re no Tina Fey
Talk about defending our shores
Their husbands prefer time with whores
Jean Schmidt always makes a scene
Sarah Palin thinks she’s queen
Mary Matalin’s hypnotized
Ingraham’s mouth is super-sized
Now women, from the G.O.P.
Republican women, mama let me be

Go, gotta get away, gotta get away
Now go go go
Gonna leave you, women
Gonna leave you, women
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
Bye-bye
You’re no good for me
I’m no good for you
Gonna look you right in the eye.
Tell you what I’m gonna do
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go
You know I’m gonna leave
You know I’m gonna go, women
I’m gonna leave, women
Goodbye, Republican women

Sarah Palin Is A Schmidt-Head

sarah-palin-solemnly-swear-vp

The Arkansas News reports that at a speech at the University of Arkansas Clinton School of Public Service, former McCain adviser and Sarah Palin critic, Steve Schmidt had some kind words for Alaska’s quitting ex-governor. Schmidt said,

I believe to this day that had she not been picked as the vice presidential candidate, we would never have been ahead — not for one second, not for one minute, not for one hour, not for one day.

Then again, when Schmidt was reminded that just a few weeks ago he said that a Palin presidential candidacy would be, “catastrophic” for Republicans in 2012, he stated that he stood by those remarks also. “I said what I said on the 2012 (race). … I said what I said today,” was his retort.

So, apparently Schmidt believes that although Palin was helpful to the McCain campaign while she was an unknown character, her light has been dimmed as the public learned more about her to the extent that her future candidacy would destroy the Republican Party. That does not sound like a vote of confidence for Caribou Barbie.

This seems like an appropriate time to re-visit those lazy-hazy days of the Palin candidacy.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the parody.

Gilligan’s Island theme link: http://www.televisiontunes.com/Gilligans_Island.html

SARAH’S ISLAND

(Sung to the theme of “Gilligan’s Island”)

Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale
A tale of a strange kinship
That started with the First Dude, Todd
And ends with Baby Tripp

Wife Sarah was Alaska’s guv’nor
Her husband a drop-out
Five children with really strange names
Hillbillies there’s no doubt.    Hillbillies there’s no doubt.

The election started getting rough
Mack needed a V.P.
He focused his attention on the Great White North
His savior Sarah P.    His savior Sarah P.

She could not handle interviews her strategy was
Senile
Too “Mavericky”
“You Betcha’s” too
“Joes Sixpack and the Plumber”
“Hockey Moms”
“The Pitbull with Lipstick on”
and, a Beehive hairstyle.

So this is the tale of the Palin Clan
The campaign was reduced to dust
Bristol had a baby boy
Levi’s mom, a bust

Sarah and her husband, Todd
Returned to the family nest
She had some softball interviews
Tough issues weren’t addressed

No Charles, no Kate, no CNN
Sure no M-S-N-B-C
They all use “Gotcha Questions”
That’s not her cup of tea

So join them here each week good friends
Fox, you can stay awhile
Greta and Hasselback will be here too

Here on “Palins Isle”

It’s A Glenn Beckian Backlash

Beck Facts

Recently, there have been more dark days for Fox News network host, Glenn Beck. Last Sunday morning on CNN‘s State Of The Union program, Democratic strategist James Carville when asked about what he thought of Beck, responded, “I think he’s nuts, OK?” and, “Just out and out nuts. And I also think that he’s a blatant hypocrite. Here’s somebody that sits on his show … weeping about how much he loves America and … and then he’s absolutely giddy when his country doesn’t get the Olympics. And this is … I’ll tell you another thing about Glenn Beck. He wouldn’t know the difference between a football, a bat and a hockey court (sic). This guy is not … he’s just all … he’s just all weeping.” Ouch !!!

Carville’s remarks followed those of Republican Senator Lindsey Graham during his appearance on Fox News earlier that day. Graham said, “[H]e doesn’t represent the Republican Party. When a person says he represents conservatism and that the country is better off with Barack Obama than John McCain, that sort of ends the debate as for me as to how much more I’m going to listen.”

Both of those negative assessments of Glenn Beck follow directly on the heels of other recent Republican and conservative criticisms of the bat-crazy host. As Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off reported on September 29th, Beck was also skewered by Joe Scarborough, Robert Frum, Mark Levin, David Brooks, Peter Wehner, Elisabeth Hasselbeck (The View) and Republican Congressman Bob Inglis of South Carolina. Oh, and we almost forgot to mention that Beck was also disavowed by the entire city council from his hometown of Mount Vernon, Washington. How many more sponsors will flee his show now?

It almost seems as if Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin are in a contest to determine who is most unpopular among Republicans and conservatives in the know. Nevertheless, is there anything more entertaining than watching Republicans feed on their young?

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along to the song parody.

You’re No Good song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hr9vKWLgZzo

YOU’RE NO GOOD

(sung to the Linda Ronstadt song “You’re No Good”)

Feeling better now that Beck’s through
Feeling better cuz his fans are few
They learned their lesson, it left a scar
Now they see that Glenn Beck’s no star

He’s no good
He’s no good
He’s no good
Glenn Beck, you’re no good

Let’s all just sing it again
He’s no good
He’s no good
He’s no good
Glenn Beck, you’re no good

You’ve come apart and don’t have a clue
Well, you have no heart and we all know it’s true
All of Glenn Beck’s sponsors starting to flee
They wouldn’t stay there if the ads were free

He’s no good
He’s no good
He’s no good
Glenn Beck, you’re no good

Let’s all just sing it again
He’s no good
He’s no good
He’s no good
Glenn Beck, you’re no good

(musical interlude)

We’re telling you now Glenn Beck, they’re going away
There’s nothing you can do now to convince them to stay

He’s no good
He’s no good
He’s no good
Glenn Beck, you’re no good

Let’s all just sing it again
He’s no good
He’s no good
He’s no good
Glenn Beck, you’re no good

Oh, oh no
He’s no good
He’s no good
He’s no good
Glenn Beck, you’re no good

Mt. Vernon City Council Says, “Get The Beck Outta Here !!!”

Glenn Beck on his Fox News show last week.

Glenn Beck on his Fox News show last week.

Last week was not a particularly good one for Glenn Beck. His first faux pas occurred when he tried to make a point on his Fox News program by throwing some frogs (he claims they were rubber) into a pot of boiling water. The only new fans he gained by that stunt were Michael Vick and his posse. The rest of civilized America was understandably disgusted by his actions.

Next, he was skewered by fellow conservative Joe Scarborough on Morning Joe which airs daily on MSNBC. Watch the clip below which also includes denunciations of Beck by Robert Frum, Mark Levin, David Brooks, Peter Wehner, the dim-witted Elisabeth Hasselbeck from The View and Republican congressman, Bob Inglis of South Carolina.

Finally, you might remember the announcement about one month ago that Mount Vernon, Washington’s (Beck’s former hometown) Republican mayor, Bob Norris had unilaterally decided to honor Glenn Beck by presenting him with the keys to the city. The mayor’s action however, triggered a firestorm which prompted 16, 000 of the city’s 26, 000 residents to present a petition to the city demanding that the honor be withdrawn because of Beck’s hate filled rhetoric. Although the mayor declined to withdraw the honor, Mount Vernon’s city council unanimously approved a resolution stating that the “City Council is in no way sponsoring the Mayor’s event…and is not connected to the Glenn Beck event in any manner.”

The event took place on Saturday, September 26th, but hundreds of protesters appeared. They wore t-shirts and placards which stated, “Hate is not a Mount Vernon value” and “Hate kills.” Additionally, a plane circled above the event pulling a sign which read, “Change the locks!” it must be tough when you are despised in your own home town.

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

That Smell song clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p6q9nBusrq8

BECK’S SMELL

(sung to the Lynyrd Skynyrd song “That Smell”)

Whiskey bottles and drug filled jars
Those were Glenn Beck’s best days
Way too much coke and too much smoke
How does Fox News take pride in you?

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Yeah,

Angel of darkness is in our view
He’s a weasel doing harm (you fool, you)
The bloviating bloke, has a show that just blows
Have a drink, fool, you clown, you (hell, yeah)

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Righties call Beck prince charming
They take his word as the gospel truth
Yet Glenn Beck’s logic is hollow, and
Fox News just might learn he has no clue (no, clue)

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

(musical interlude)

Oh, Glenn Beck’s views
Do nothing else but spread alarm
Beck’s a fear-mongering bore

(musical interlude)

Beck has his own little Waterloo

It’s a monkey on his back
Sponsors have split from his racist schticks
One hell of a price and Beck’s show might get nixed (hell, yeah)

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
Don’t Glenn smell like hell?
Ooh, ooh Beck’s smell
The smell of Beck surrounds you

Oh, Glenn Beck’s views
Do nothing else but spread alarm
Beck’s just a fool, just a fool, just a fool.

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