Category Archives: Dick Cheney

A Saturday List To Think About And Comment Upon

Please read this list and then describe what thought comes to mind in the comment section:

  • Glenn Beck
  • Ron Paul
  • Rush Limbaugh
  • Donald Trump
  • Michelle Malkin
  • Newt Gingrich
  • Ann Coulter
  • Michele Bachmann
  • Sean Hannity
  • Sarah Palin
  • Laura Ingraham
  • Rand Paul
  • Tucker Carlson
  • Rudi Giuliani
  • Christine O’Donnell
  • Larry Craig
  • Michael Savage
  • David Vitter
  • Scott Brown
  • Dick Morris
  • Fox News
  • Dick Cheney
  • Tea Party

Here’s what comes to my mind:

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Strangers In The Night song link:


(sung to the Frank Sinatra song “Strangers In The Night”)

Strange ones on the right,
Fox News romancers
Not so very bright,
With our finances
This Tea Party love
Should be viewed as taboo

Palin shouting lies
And fear inciting
Rand Paul is hostile
And so damn frightening
Boehner has no heart
McConnell has no clue

Strange ones on the right,
Abnormal people
They are strange ones on the right
Not one sane moment
They should be in a freak-show
Little do they know
It would just enhance our day
If like Bristol they’d dance away and –

And on Fox every night,
They’re all together
Lovers on the right
In love forever
It’s an ugly sight
Those strange ones on the right

(Tea-Bagging break)

Don’t look now just glance away
Here comes their jailbird Tom Delay

You can join their fight
And hang together
Only if you’re white
Birds of a feather
Taking their last flight
Those strange ones on the right

Sunday Mid-Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 67

Just a few newsworthy events (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS: The family of Christina Taylor Green, the nine-year-old girl killed when a gunman opened fire on Rep. Gabrielle Giffords at a “Congress on Your Corner” event, has donated some of her organs, and they are already saving another child’s life. Some of her organs were transplanted to a little girl from Boston.

THIS JUST IN: Speaking of transplants, it has been reported that former Vice President and Torturer in Chief, Dick Cheney may require a heart transplant. Is anyone else out there surprised to learn that he had one in the first place?

BREAKING NEWS:  Joe Lieberman, the sometimes Democrat, sometimes Republican Senator from Connecticut has announced that he will retire at the end of his term. At least this way his dismissal from the Senate will be on his own terms and not those of the Connecticut voters. Hey Joe, don’t let the door hit you in one of your two faces on the way out!

THIS JUST IN: North Dakota’s Blue-Dog Democratic Senator Kent Conrad has also announced that he will not seek re-election. Conrad was one of the Democrats who helped sink the public option during the health care reform debates. Hey Kent, please take note of what we had to say to fellow traitor Joe Lieberman just above!

BREAKING NEWS: Speaking of health care reform, the state of Vermont may be moving towards a single payer system. The Bennington Banner reports that Vermont’s congressional delegation joined Governor Peter Shumlin Tuesday to announce legislation that would allow states to seek federal health care waivers in 2014, and the flexibility to craft their own state-level health care plans. Landmark health care reform legislation signed into law last year by President Barack Obama provides states the option of seeking a federal waiver to opt out of some requirements of the bill as long as certain standards are maintained. That provision was sought by U.S. Sen. Bernie Sanders, a Vermont independent. Shumlin, a Democrat sworn in to office earlier this month, promised during the campaign that he would seek a single-payer health care system for the state. Let’s hear it for the progressive state of Vermont!

THIS JUST IN: The polar opposite of Vermont of course, is the backward state of Alabama. Speaking on Martin Luther King Jr. Day in the very church where Dr. King once pastored, new Alabama Governor Robert Bentley gave a speech in which he said that those who have not accepted Jesus Christ as their savior are not his “brothers.” How is that for an all inclusive Republican umbrella?

BREAKING NEWS: The Reagan boys may be bickering as to whether or not their father, Ronald Reagan had lost his mind while in office, but former CBS reporter Leslie Stahl knows the truth. In the book she published in 2000, Reporting Live, Stahl recounts a disturbing encounter she had with Reagan in the summer of 1986. Stahl was finishing up a stint as CBS News’ White House correspondent, and she was awarded the customary farewell audience with the president. She wrote,

“…Reagan didn’t seem to know who I was. He gave me a distant look with those milky eyes and shook my hand weakly. Oh, my, he’s gonzo, I thought. I have to go out on the lawn tonight and tell my countrymen that the president of the United States is a doddering space cadet. My heart began to hammer with the import…I was aware of the delicacy with which I would have to write my script. But I was quite sure of my diagnosis.”

THIS JUST IN: We are happy to report that both Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity had their nationally syndicated radio shows dropped from WPHT in Philadelphia, which is the second radio station to drop both of the conservative commentators. A few weeks ago Beck was dropped from station WOR in New York, and Hannity was dropped from KSL Radio in Utah. Speculation is that poor ratings and an industry-wide advertiser desire to distance itself from the rhetoric spouted by hate radio may have been the catalyst for the cancellations.

BREAKING NEWS: The most recent Washington Post/ABC poll reveals that 52% of Americans now hold unfavorable views of the Tea Party which is a new high. Only 35% like the Tea Baggers which is the same percentage that hold favorable views of Saudi Arabia. Shockingly, more Americans favor Russia (47%) and socialism (36%) over the Tea Party.

THIS JUST IN: Lynnrockets is by no means a fan of Howard Stern, but he uttered one of the more memorable lines about Sarah Palin this week. No, we are not referring to his expletive-laced diatribe against the Queen of Quit. We liked this one simple sentence: “This woman is a vomit.” Short and to the point.


Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody which features the whole bunch of conservatives.

California Dreamin’ song link:


(sung to the Mamas & The Papas song “California Dreamin’”)

All their shirts are brown
(All their shirts are brown)
And their hair is grey
(And their hair is grey)
Listen to them talk
(Listen to them talk)
As they loudly pray
(As they loudly pray)
Scandal is their norm
(Scandal is their norm)
They have one every day
(They have one every day)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
And politics of hate

Members of John Birch
Some won’t admit they’re gay
But when they get down on their knees
(Get down on their knees)
That’s when they like to play
(When they like to play)
These slimy creatures should be told
(Creatures should be told)
Membership’s gone away
(Members gone away)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has led them all astray

(musical interlude)

Glenn Beck is a clown
(Glenn Beck is a clown)
What does Limbaugh weigh?
(What does Limbaugh weigh?)
Palin cannot talk
(Palin cannot talk)
She’s no Tina Fey
(She’s no Tina Fey)
Somebody should tell her
(Somebody should tell her)
To just go away
(To just go away)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has become so cliché
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has lost all its cache´
(Conservative dreamin’)
Drives voters all away

Whatever Happened To Baby-Cheney?

Liz "Mini-Me" Cheney and Dick "Dr. Evil" Cheney

Just when you thought that you had heard the last from former Vice President and Torturer-in-Chief Dick Cheney’s daughter, up pops her venomous head. On Wednesday, Liz Cheney donned her horn-ensconced battle helmet and made one of the most idiotic hawk-like pronouncements in recent history. It was an honest to goodness head-scratcher.

Liz Cheney’s statement followed a report in The Washington Post which quoted a portion of journalist Bob Woodward’s new book detailing the Obama administration’s deliberations over U.S. strategy in Afghanistan and more specifically with the threat of future terrorist attacks on American soil. Obama told Woodward,

“We can absorb a terrorist attack. We’ll do everything we can to prevent it, but even a 9/11, even the biggest attack ever . . . we absorbed it and we are stronger,”

Let’s disect and analyze what Obama said. He explained that the United States is strong enough to survive any type of terrorist attack including one on the scale of the 9/11 attacks. Indeed, he warned any future terrorists that not only will his administration “do everything we can to prevent it”, but he also explained that even the 9/11 attacks did not topple the government and we are now an even stronger and more committed nation in the battle against terrorism. That sounds like a pretty strong warning addressed to any future would-be terrorists, doesn’t it?

Well, it sounds like that to any sane person, but as we know, Liz Cheney has proven to be reality challenged. Remember, this is the woman that still contends that “waterboarding” is both safe and legal. So, what was Liz Cheney’s take on President Obama’s quote? She said that the…

“comment suggests an alarming fatalism on the part of President Obama and his administration. Once again the President seems either unwilling or unable to do what it takes to keep this nation safe. The President owes the American people an explanation.”

The President expressed “an alarming fatalism”? He is “either unwilling or unable to do what it takes to keep this nation safe”? Liz Cheney is a certifiable crazy woman! If memory serves us correctly, wasn’t it her father’s administration that was actually either “unwilling or unable” to keep the nation safe during the nine month’s leading up to and including September 11, 2001? Apparently in Cheney-World you are expressing fatalism and not safeguarding your nation as President if you threaten any potential would-be terrorists with the warning that the United States withstood the worst attack they could conjure up and is even stronger and more committed to fight back since that moment. But you are blameless and strong if your administration was actually in power and was “either unwilling or unable to do what it takes to keep this nation safe” when the country was actually attacked by terrorists. That reasoning is so warped that it is almost Palinesque.

Where was the young Cheney’s outrage when shortly after the actual 9/11 attacks, then-President Bush actually goaded any future terrorists to “Bring it On!”? He may as well have added, “I double dare ya!” Honestly, where was Liz Cheney and her criticism then? Bush did not express a sense of fatalism that there might be another attack. Instead, he actually enticed another terrorist attack. But Little-Liz Cheney was silent.

If I were a supporter or donated to Cheney’s “Keep America Safe” foundation, at this point I would begin questioning my own sanity.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s very topical song parody.

Welcome To My Nightmare song link:


(sung to the Alice Cooper song “Welcome To My Nightmare”)

Welcome to my nightmare
You ain’t seen nothin’ like it
I think you’re gonna feel
Something’s wrong

A cerebral vacation
Republicans need sedation
Their mouths will be filled with foam
Before too long

Welcome to my nightmare, ohh

Welcome to my breakdown
Does Lizzie Cheney scare you?
That’s just the way they are
In Red State towns

They sweat and laugh and scream there
Mann Coulter’s their wet dream there
He really makes them feel
Right at home, there

Welcome to my breakdown, ohh
You’re welcome to my nightmare, yeah

(musical interlude)

Welcome to my nightmare
You know I just don’t like it
G.O.P. makes me feel
I don’t belong

They lie and shout and scream there
And Palin is their queen there
They all giggle and squeal
At her throne, there

Welcome to my nightmare, ohh
Welcome to my breakdown

(great instrumental fade out)

Tales From Cheney’s Darkside

Cheney Gun

Everybody remembers when Dick Cheney justified the torture of prisoners by claiming that sometimes it is necessary to venture over to the dark side. Well, this is the first in an ongoing series of articles about Dick Cheney’s “Dark Side”.

It seems like only yesterday, when on February 11, 2006, then Vice President Dick Cheney shot his 78 year old longtime friend and attorney, Harry Whittington in the face while hunting. We all remember that it seemed as if a full blown cover-up was in effect when we learned that the incident was not reported to the local authorities for hours and that even the dimwit George W. Bush was not notified immediately by Cheney’s cronies. The story got even better when the public began to hear stories that Cheney was drinking shortly before the hunt. Best of all, however, was when the victim, Whittingham, ended up apologizing to Cheney for “ruining his (i.e. Cheney’s) day“ or something to that effect.

Boy, we really do miss those good old days.

If any readers would like to suggest another episode from Cheney’s “Dark Side”, please post same on the comment board. Please, oh pretty please?

Janie’s Got A Gun song link:


(sung to the Aerosmith song “Janie’s Got A Gun”)

Dumb, dumb, dumb, Dickie what have you done
Dumb, dumb, dumb, that’s the sound of your gun
Dumb, dumb, dumb, Dickie what have you done
Dumb, dumb, dumb, that’s the sound, that’s the sound…
Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah…
Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah…

Cheney’s got a gun
Cheney’s got a gun
He’s having lots of fun
While drinking out in the sun
What did the VP do?
Nobody’s saying, “boo”

They say while he was out huntin’,
He shot his buddy in the face
He should have seen it comin’
Cuz that Cheney had a gun
And the drinkin’ sure made him a waste

Cheney’s got a gun
Cheney’s got a gun
The cover-up’s begun
Those chicken-hawks are on the run
What did Dick Cheney do?
Will his best buddy sue?

He gun blasted Harry Whittington
And then told him to shut his mouth
Cheney told him not to say a peep
Or he would take the big sleep
That’s the way we handle things down South

Run away, run away from the blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

Run away, run away from the blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run, run away

Cheney’s got a gun
Cheney’s got a gun
The cover-up’s begun
This guy would tell lies to a nun
What did W do?
That jerk didn’t have a clue

Bush had to let him off easy
Cuz he needs Dick to be his brain
Bush says we gotta go on TV
But Dick is such a sleaze
He’ll find someone else to pin the blame

Run away, run away from the blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

Run away, run away from the blame
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
Run away, run away, run, run away

Cheney’s got a gun
Cheney’s got a gun
Cheney’s got a gun
Dick and George are on the run

Cheney’s got a gun
Shootin’ folks is so fun
Now Dick and George are on the run (Cheney, Cheney what’s your problem)
Cuz Cheney’s got a gun (Tell me it ain’t right)
Cheney’s got a gun ( Bush is Cheney’s little Robin)
The cover-up’s begun (Who will Cheney shoot tonight)
Chicken-hawks on the run
Cheney’s got a gun

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 42

Just a few newsworthy events and comments thereon that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please chuckle a bit before enjoying Fathers’ Day.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “The Other Crazy Carolina” features North Carolina mountain man, Tim Peeler who claims to have encountered Bigfoot. Rather than describe the situation, let’s just go straight to the video, shall we…

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Republicans Living In A World Of Fiction” features Pat Buchanan. He not only defends “Brain Fartin'” Joe Barton’s apology to BP for having to cough up $20 Billion for an oil spill victims’ escrow fund, but likens Attorney General Eric Holder to the fictional Godfather enforcer Luca Brasi making “a deal they couldn’t refuse”. This is just the latest example of Republicans like Dick Cheney so often defending torture in the event of a 24 like ticking time bomb. What’s next, will Sarah Palin compare Barack Obama to the “Smoke Monster” from Lost?

BREAKING NEWS: Oops! We spoke too soon. This week’s second edition of “Republicans Living In A World Of Fiction” features conservative pundit Ann “The Man” Coulter. While appearing as a guest on the Fox network’s The O’Reilly Factor, the Coulter guy began comparing liberals to children who supposedly think that President Obama is either the tooth fairy or Santa Claus. Keep trying Coulter but you’ll never out-crazy Beck, Palin and Bachmann.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Republicans Doing The Flip Flop” features California Gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman. You might remember that during the primary, Whitman supported a no amnesty and zero tolerance posture towards illegal immigration in an effort to grab the conservative vote. However, now that she has secured the Republican spot, she must cater to the vast number of California Hispanics. Hence, she has released a campaign ad in which she portrays herself as “the Republican who opposed the Arizona (racist immigrant) law”. Nice try Meg. We are sure you will be embraced by the Spanish speaking community.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “You Can Run But You Can’t Hide” features Sarah Palin the former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska. After months of requests from reporters, California State University, Stanislaus (rhymes with Santa Claus) on Friday agreed to allow members of the media to attend a fundraiser next week Palin. The unusually secretive reality tv host and fence builder will now be on public display for the world to ridicule. Just wondering, but will they be serving word salad at the event?

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Do As I Say, Not As I Do” features Florida’s Republican Gubernatorial candidate Marco “Polo” Rubio. You might recall that Rubio has been basing his campaign on fiscal conservatism and he repeatedly criticizes the Obama administration for spending money that it does not have. Well, a funny thing happened on the way to election day. Rubio is reportedly facing foreclosure on a Tallahassee home that he stopped making mortgage payments on last February. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Maybe Charlie Crist will rent him a room.

BREAKING NEWS: TPM/Muckraker gives us ” The 7 Dumbest Things BP Has Said About The Spill – – So Far.”

  1. “The Gulf of Mexico is a very big ocean. The amount of volume of oil and dispersant we are putting into it is tiny in relation to the total water volume.”
  2. “everything we can see at the moment suggests that the overall environmental impact of this will be very, very modest.”
  3. BP CEO Tony Hayward says, “Y’know, I’d like my life back,”
  4. BP Chairman Carl-Henric Svanberg told the Financial Times on May 25 — his first newspaper interview since the April 20 Deepwater Horizon explosion — that his company still has a future in the U.S. because BP is “big and important.”
  5. “The oil is on the surface,” Hayward said. “There aren’t any plumes.”
  6. BP COO Doug Suttles told the Associated Press on June 8 that the oil leak should slow to “a relative trickle” soon.
  7. “I care about the small people. I hear comments sometimes that large oil companies are greedy companies or don’t care, but that is not the case at BP. We care about the small people.”

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Tepid Tea” features Mark Williams. The conservative radio talk show host and prominent Tea Party activist is giving up his role as the chairman of the Tea Party Express. It seems that even this bigoted jack-ass can read the tea leaves and see that the Tea-Baggers are on the way out. The Tea Party will be remembered as a flash in the pan.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody which features the whole bunch of conservatives.

California Dreamin’ song link:


(sung to the Mamas & The Papas song “California Dreamin’”)

All their shirts are brown
(All their shirts are brown)
And their hair is grey
(And their hair is grey)
Listen to them talk
(Listen to them talk)
As they loudly pray
(As they loudly pray)
Scandal is their norm
(Scandal is their norm)
They have one every day
(They have one every day)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
And politics of hate

Members of John Birch
Some won’t admit they’re gay
But when they get down on their knees
(Get down on their knees)
That’s when they like to play
(When they like to play)
These slimy creatures should be told
(Creatures should be told)
Membership’s gone away
(Members gone away)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has led them all astray

(musical interlude)

Glenn Beck is a clown
(Glenn Beck is a clown)
What does Limbaugh weigh?
(What does Limbaugh weigh?)
Palin cannot talk
(Palin cannot talk)
She’s no Tina Fey
(She’s no Tina Fey)
Somebody should tell her
(Somebody should tell her)
To just go away
(To just go away)
Conservative dreamin’
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has become so cliché
(Conservative dreamin’)
Has lost all its cache´
(Conservative dreamin’)
Drives voters all away

Torturer In Chief Rears His Ugly Head

This week former Decider in Chief, George W. Bush admitted (finally) that his administration ordered the illegal torture of detainees. On Wednesday, while speaking at the Economic Club of Grand Rapids, he said he has no regrets about authorizing the controversial waterboarding technique to interrogate terrorist suspects and wouldn’t hesitate to do so again. His exact words?

Yeah, we waterboarded Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, I’d do it again to save lives.

Problem number one with Bush’s assertion is that the waterboarding of Mohammed did not save any lives. Indeed, it likely only produced misinformation. As the Los Angeles Times reported last summer, the torture only resulted in misinformation:

Self-proclaimed Sept. 11 mastermind Khalid Shaikh Mohammed told U.S. military officials that he had lied to the CIA after being abused, according to documents made public Monday. The claim is likely to intensify the debate over whether harsh interrogation techniques generated accurate information.

Mohammed made the assertion during hearings at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, where he was transferred in 2006 after being held at secret CIA sites since his capture in 2003.

“I make up stories,” Mohammed said, describing in broken English an interrogation probably administered by the CIA concerning the whereabouts of Al Qaeda leader Osama bin Laden. “Where is he? I don’t know. Then, he torture me,” Mohammed said of his interrogator. “Then I said, ‘Yes, he is in this area.’ “

Mohammed also appeared to say that he had fingered people he did not know as being Al Qaeda members in order to avoid abusive treatment. Although there is no way to corroborate his statements, Mohammed is one of the militants whom the CIA repeatedly subjected to the simulated-drowning technique known as waterboarding.,0,316330.story

Problem number two with Bush’s assertion is that he directly contradicted his previous assurances to the American people that “We do not torture”. If Bush is trying to conclude that waterboarding is not torture, he is wrong. U.S. Code section 2340 defines torture as follows:

(1) “torture” means an act committed by a person acting under the color of law specifically intended to inflict severe physical or mental pain or suffering (other than pain or suffering incidental to lawful sanctions) upon another person within his custody or physical control;

(2) “severe mental pain or suffering” means the prolonged mental harm caused by or resulting from—

(A) the intentional infliction or threatened infliction of severe physical pain or suffering;
(B) the administration or application, or threatened administration or application, of mind-altering substances or other procedures calculated to disrupt profoundly the senses or the personality;
(C) the threat of imminent death; or
(D) the threat that another person will imminently be subjected to death, severe physical pain or suffering, or the administration or application of mind-altering substances or other procedures calculated to disrupt profoundly the senses or personality; and
The technique of waterboarding is commonly defined as,

immobilizing the victim on his or her back with the head inclined downwards, and then pouring water over the face and into the breathing passages. By forced suffocation and inhalation of water, the subject experiences drowning and is caused to believe they are about to die. {See,White, Josh (November 8, 2007). “Waterboarding Is Torture, Says Ex-Navy Instructor“. The Washington Post. Retrieved on December 17, 2007.}

Conservative columnist, Christopher Hitchens voluntarily experienced waterboarding twice in 2008. He lasted 12 seconds the first time and 19 seconds on the next attempt. Of the experience, he said,

There is a common misconception that waterboarding simulates the sensation of drowning, but you are to all intents and purposes actually drowning.if waterboarding does not constitute torture, then there is no such thing as torture. Believe me. It’s torture. {SeeHitchens, Christopher (August 2008). “Believe Me, It’s Torture“. Vanity Fair. Retrieved on April 17, 2009.

It is also worth noting that both John McCain and Mike Huckabee defined waterboarding as torture during their respective 2008 campaigns. It seems obvious that McCain knows a little bit about the subject of torture.

It would appear obvious from a reading of both definitions and from Hitchen’s description that waterboarding is torture. Furthermore, the United States has a past record of prosecuting water torture as a war crime. In 1947, a Japanese civilian who had served in the Japanese military as an interpreter was convicted for, among other things, committing water torture. The alleged water torture was specified as consisting of “forcing water into {the} mouths and noses” of two prisoners. .  Sounds a lot like waterboarding, doesn’t it? So, let’s not let former Bush administration officials and Fox News sycophants get away with denying that it is torture and it is illegal.

Next, we must deal with the justification for waterboarding on the basis that it yielded valuable intelligence. Forget it. This is a red herring of an argument. If waterboarding is torture and therefore a criminal act, it matters not what  valuable information was gleemed therefrom. The United States is a nation of laws. As an example, consider this scenario. Larceny is an illegal criminal act. Inasmuch as the U.S. Government’s computer systems seem to get hacked on a near daily basis, it would be quite valuable for the government to acquire a more sophisticated security system. It would be illegal, however for the government to acquire such a system by means of simply stealing it from say Microsoft. Indeed, the United States justice system would prevent or redress just such an action.

OK then, now that we’re finished with that, let’s have some fun with a song parody…

F Troop link:


(sung to the television theme of “F Troop”)

The dawn of the Iraq War was near
When coincidentally
Cheney and Bush got the limits pushed
And commenced torturous brutality.

The methods employed often maimed and killed
Which pleased Cheney’s vicious group.
The waterboard trick both chilled and thrilled
Nobody was appalled they were called Bush Troop.

With testicle bites and really bright lights
Their victims sure took a lickin’
From draft dodging war hawks
Who are just chickens.

When killing and maiming get them down
They know their morale can’t droop.
As long as they own old D.C. Town
They are sure to resume with a bang and a boom
Bush Troop.

Sunday Mid-Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 37

Just a few noteworthy news satellites that have been careening around the blogosphere this week…

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Why Am I Not Surprised” features Slick-Dick Cheney’s pal the Halliburton corporation. the company has become the object of several controversies involving the 2003 Iraq War and the company’s ties to Former U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney. Cheney retired from the company during the 2000 U.S. presidential election campaign with a severance package worth $36 million. As of 2004, he had received $398,548 in deferred compensation from Halliburton while Vice President. Cheney was chairman and CEO of Halliburton Company from 1995 to 2000 and has received stock options from Halliburton. The company has a long history of shoddy workmanship and of defrauding the US Government (and consequently, US taxpayers) by means of repeated and excessive overcharges regarding government contracts. Well, now it has been revealed that Halliburton is partially responsible for the recent catastrophic Gulf Coast oil rig explosion and spill. Halliburton provided well cementing services on the rig and now it looks as if flaws in that process led to the massive failure of the well’s structural integrity. Anyone surprised?

THIS JUST IN: We all understand the nexus between the State of Alaska and the oil industry, but enough is enough already. This week Alaska’s Republican Senator Lisa Murkowski objected to a voice vote request by Sen. Robert Menendez (D-N.J.) on the bill, which would have spiked the maximum liability for oil companies after an oil spill from $75 million to $10 billion. The legislation has significant support from Democrats, and the White House has indicated it backs an increase in liability caps. Republicans are on the side of the oil companies, not the American people.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “WTF Took You So Long” features former First Stepford Wife, Laura Bush who admitted on Larry King Live that she is pro-choice and in favor of gay marriage and has been so forever. Should she perhaps have publicly defended her positions at some point while her brain-dead husband of a President was forever advocating legislation in opposition to those beliefs? Please watch the clip…

Then again, Laura Bush is now hawking a book and as we know from Sarah Palin, nothing sells like shock and controversy.

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Conservatives Caught With Their Pants Down” features Longtime Religious Right leader Rev. Dr. George Rekers. He has been embroiled in a gay sex scandal for the past two weeks, and has now resigned from the board of directors of NARTH (National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality.) For those of you not in the know, it was revealed that Rekers hired a male prostitute to travel with him to Europe. As Queen would say, “another one bites the dust”.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Lies And The Lying Liars Who Tell Them” features Ergun Caner, the President of Liberty University’s (yes, Jerry Falwell’s Liberty University) seminary. Talk To Action reports that “Caner has made a name for himself by highlighting his unusual life story: He says he was born into a stridently Muslim family in Turkey, where he learned to hate America and Christians. As Caner tells it, he flirted with jihad before undergoing a life-changing conversion to fundamentalist Christianity. He then persuaded most of his family to convert as well, and they now spread the gospel.” A compelling story but untrue. “Despite his claims about having lived in Turkey, it now appears that Caner was born in Sweden and moved to Ohio when he was 4 years old. His father was a Muslim, but his mother was Lutheran. The couple divorced, and Caner’s mother retained custody. He became an evangelical Christian as a teen; it’s unlike he was ever recruited by jihadists.” Ahhh, the rarefied air of Liberty University!

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Daddy, Please Make The Crazy Lady Stop Talking!” features Minnesota’s Republican US Senator, Michele Bachmann. During a Tuesday night webcast with Ensuring Liberty, a Tea Party PAC, Rep. Michele Bachmann likened the financial reform bill that is being debated in Congress to Mussolini’s Fascist Italy. She said,

Let’s remember really what this is. This has a lot in common with Italy in the 1930s and they way Italy dealt with economics,” she said. “It still continues private ownership of business but government is in control.” She continued, “So government control of the private business, while it’s private ownership, that’s still at the end of the day the federal government virtually having a say over private business. We lose freedoms; we lose economic competitiveness.

OK Michele, now take your medicine and go back to sleep for awhile.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Let’s Blame God” features Rick Perry, the Republican Governor of Texas. Last week the secessionist and Sarah Palin fanboy said the massive oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico should not be lamed on the oil industry, calling such spills “acts of God that cannot be prevented.” Gee, who knew that God created that faulty rig.

THIS JUST IN: It wouldn’t be a weekly wrap-up without our favorite wingnut, now would it? So, this week’s edition of  “Tea (Party) For Two and Two For Tea (Party)” features Sarah Palin, the ex-quitting Governor of Alaska and Jan Brewer, the present Governor of Arizona. The two members of the G.O.P. “braintrust” appeared together yesterday in Phoenix to denounce President Obama’s  criticism of Arizona’s new racist immigrant law. The law requires immigrants in Arizona to carry their registration documents at all times and allows police to question individuals’ immigration status in the process of enforcing any other law or ordinance. Problem is, even legal “brown” skinned citizens and immigrants are likely to be “asked for their papers” even though they are not required to carry them. If they do not have those “papers” with them, they are subject to detainment and arrest. As president Obama said,

You can imagine if you are an Hispanic American in Arizona, your great grandparents may have been there before Arizona was even a state, but now suddenly if you don’t have your papers, and you took your kid out to get ice cream, you’re gonna be harassed. That’s something that could potentially happen. That’s not the right way to go.

Like the nativist “Know Nothings” of the 1840’s and 1850’s however, Palin and Brewer have deceived themselves into believing the “us” versus “them” scenario is the only solution to immigration problems. Indeed, in defending the concept of “presenting papers”, the snow-white Palin said, “I think for most American people the reaction to that would be, ‘Why aren’t (police) already doing that?'” What would she say if native Alaskans treated the Idaho transplant similarly? Keep up the good work on that Arizona products and travel boycott!!!

Today’s song parody takes a rapid-fire look at Republicans past, present and future. Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the parody.

We Didn’t Start The Fire song link:


(sung to the Billy Joel song “We Didn’t Start The Fire”)

Ronald Reagan, Larry Craig, Mark Sanford, Tom Delay
Michelle Malkin, Michele Bachmann, “Goin’ with the flow”

Joe McCarthy, Richard Nixon, Howard Baker, lack of vision
Spreading Fear, Acting queer, and ole Sixpack Joe

No icebergs, H-Bomb, “Pay for play”, “Hockey Mom”
Landrieu, Hamid Karzai, and that Michael Savage guy

Ivy tower, Van Flein, Tea-bagger party scene
Party of “No”, Tim Pawlenty, Let’s watch Glenn Beck cry

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Vitter’s fallin’, Ginny Foxx, Boehner and Inhofe
Mitch McConnell, small umbrella, Talking the talk

Spin Zone, Rent to own, Straight martini, Bank loan
Russian view and Pastor Haggard’s flock

Sex crimes, Grassley, John McCain is “Mavericky”
Lining pockets, health care plan, Giuliani, Limbaugh Land

Barrasso, Fake protest, Tom “The Hammer”, Chambliss
Senate race, Lack of grace, and Melvin Martinez

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Loaded Glock, SarahPAC, Sam Alito, Johnny Mack
Jindal, Right to die, Tripp’s father is Levi

Pentagon, Border wall, We must deport them all
Bed-wetters, genocide, No assisted suicide

Bush’s folly, Torture, Dick Cheney, Blackwater
Hate groups, Castro, John Ensign and his ‘ho

First Dude, Hannity, Mann Coulter and O’Reilly
Scooter Libby, Karl Rove, Sarah Palin’s “Sixpack Joes”

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Kay Bailey, Muslims, K Street is full of bums
Villains, Pearlman, Iraqi Invasion

Health reform hysteria, Sarah Palin mania
Shameless G-Men, War in Afghanistan

Ron Paul, Airport sex, They don’t want no litmus test
Kneel and pray, Always “nay”, Can’t get married if you’re gay

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it

Birth control, Lives of sin, They like folks that have white skin
Buckshot, Dow stock, Loud mouthed chicken-hawks
Takin’ Bacon, Palestine, Palin is no friend of mine
Now they have nukes in Iran, Couldn’t stop the Taliban

Makin’ fortunes, Soldiers die, Did we mention Glenn Beck cried?
Foreign debts, Homeless vets, Exposed by three jets
We voted them out the door, Now they’re just a mouse that roars
Spider holes and unjust wars, I can’t take them anymore.

These are G.O.P. liars
Shy away from learning
Keep our stomachs turning
Burning their cross of fire
We watched them light it
And they can’t deny it
(repeat chorus to fade)

The Homecoming Queen’s Got A Gun!

I apologize to all of you for the long delay in posting, but I am sure that you can understand that when you lose a loved one it takes a while to get your wits back and to fall back into the daily groove. I would also like to thank all of you that sent supportive messages during my absence. They were very comforting during this most difficult time.

That being said, now it is time to get back to business. Thankfully, once again Sarah Palin has leapt to the front of the daily news  queue. She seems to have a knack for injecting herself into the news cycle whenever the Democrats have a positive development. This time she chose the day of President Obama’s National Health Care Reform Summit to announce that she will be the headline speaker at the National Rifle Association’s annual meeting to be held in Charlotte, North Carolina on May 14th. The forum is undoubtedly  a step up from her already scheduled speaking gigs at the National Bowling Convention and The Liquor Wholesalers Convention. Just the same, it fits in neatly with the allegedly gun-toting mama bear’s manufactured persona as a sexy, tough “Joanne Sixpack”. Rumor has it however, that the former ex-quitting governor of Alaska was actually only the second choice of the NRA. The first choice of the riflemen was the former Face-Shooter in Chief, Dick Cheney but his fifth heart attack will sideline him for awhile.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

It’s Still Rock And Roll To Me link:


(sung to the Billy Joel song “It’s Still Rock and Roll To Me ”)

What’s the matter with the clothes she’s wearing?
I believe they’re made from wolf hide
Maybe she should buy a new pair of glasses
She’s lookin’ just a bit pie-eyed
Just when you think Sarah’s sounding kinda murky,
She gives an interview while someone kills a turkey
Everybody’s talkin’ ‘bout polar bears
Funny, but it’s still lock and load for she

What’s the matter with the plane that she’s flying?
It’s not the one she sold on Ebay
She likes to leave the State of Alaska
With her family every single day
First she gave a speech in Minneapolis
Next she was headed right out to Indianapolis
Next day, Green Bay, then it’s off to LA
It’s still lock and load for she

Oh, it doesn’t matter what they say in the papers
‘Cause it’s always been the same damn scene.
She has to leave the state,
‘Cause the politics of hate dictate a nasty travel routine…
Spending the taxpayers’ green.

How about those ethics violations?
And Sarah Baby’s song and dance
She would really love to jail the complainants
If she only had half a chance.
And then there’s Levi and his TV interviews,
If he isn’t careful, he’ll be sporting cement shoes
Defense funds, end runs, new guns for everyone
It’s still lock and load for she

What’s the matter with the company she’s keepin’?
Don’t she know that they’re out of touch?
Like Sarah, they lack a strong education
Can’t accuse them of knowin’ much
That seems to be OK with the G.O.P.
Who needs college when you have a G.E.D.
It’s the new cool, no school, milky eyes and mouth drool
And Sarah is the big Queen bee
Everybody’s talkin’ bout the new party
Funny, but it’s still the same G.O.P.

Memo To Sarah Palin: Nobody Asked Your Opinion

Here she goes again. Sarah Palin is now calling upon President Barack Obama to fire his top aide, Rahm Emanuel as a consequence of his using coarse language in a strategy session. Emanuel allegedly referred to liberal groups that attacked the president’s health care reform plan last August as “F-ing retarded”.

Regarding the remark, CNN reports that Palin says,

His recent tirade against participants in a strategy session was such a strong slap in many American faces that our president is doing himself a disservice by seeming to condone Rahm’s recent sick and offensive tactic. Just as we’d be appalled if any public figure of Rahm’s stature ever used the “N-word” or other such inappropriate language, Rahm’s slur on all God’s children with cognitive and developmental disabilities – and the people who love them – is unacceptable, and it’s heartbreaking.

Okay then, where shall we begin? First of all it is clear that Sarah Palin is not fit to serve in high office if she cannot tolerate the rough and tumble language of smoke filled rooms and closed door meetings. My goodness, would this delicate little flower wilt and crumble when Putin “rears his head over Alaska” and calls her a name? Where would she hide when Osama Bin Laden sends another audiotape? Has she never heard the tapes of Presidents Nixon and Johnson and the most recent Face Shooter in Chief, Dick Cheney? If she has then why has she never mentioned her outrage?

Additionally, aren’t her remarks a perfect example of the pot calling the kettle black? After all, it was only last October when her almost son-in-law Levi Johnston appeared on network television and revealed that Sarah Palin joked about her son Trig’s Down Syndrome, calling him her “retarded baby.” Ouch! Johnston added that the slur was not just a  one time occurrance, but was used quite frequently.

Finally, although Emanuel should have used different words, Palin has missed his point entirely. The context of his remark makes clear that he was not poking fun in any way at those actually suffering from mental disabilities. On the contrary, Emanuel was pointing out the irrational position of those persons that would oppose a form of health care reform that has a goal of providing insurance and therefore medical services to just those patients that may be denied medical services under the present system. But how could we expect Sarah Palin to understand that? The only two phrases she has ever associated with health care reform are “socialist” and “death panels”.

Sarah Palin is a dangerous, hypocritical one-trick pony who’s opinion should never be solicited on any subject of importance.

In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

My Way song link:


(sung to Frank Sinatra’s “My Way”)

And now, the end is near;
To all of you, I’m glad I met ya’
Alaskans, let’s make it clear,
Did I fool you?, Oh yeah, “ya betcha!”

You’ve met Todd, the “First Dude”,
His snowmachine is in the driveway.
Is he drunk? My God, he’s blitzed,
The D.U.I. way.

Regrets, I’ve had a few;
More than most, I will remember.
My lipstick and my hair-do
But most of all, 4th of November.

Each day since then has been
Another never-ending whine and cry day,
And I’ve been told by Newt Gingrich,
To hit the highway.

Yes, there were times, that now you know
I failed to declare “per diem” dough.
What’s this about “stimulus funds”?
Let’s just cling to, our God and guns.
Oh, I just winked and then I blinked;
And did it my way.

Nicknames, I’ve had a few
There’s “Caribou” and “Barracuda”
Now I’m known as “Sarah Who?”
Cuz Tina Fey is so much cuter.

To think I’m a has been;
And I can’t see – beyond next Friday
Woe, oh woe is me,
I won’t have my day.

For what is a gal, what has she got?
When her career, has gone to pot.
How to appear on nightly news;
When she’s inept at interviews.
She’s still exposed despite those clothes
Please hit the highway!

Yes, hit the highway.

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 24

Just a few noteworthy news stories and comments thereon that have been orbiting the galaxies this past week.

BREAKING NEWS: There was an interesting moment on MSNBC’s Hardball With Chris Matthews this week. The guest was Republican strategist Todd Harris. He was asked by Matthews to name just one thing that the Republican party has done for the country in the last 15 to 20 years. He could not come up with one thing.

MATTHEWS: I just wanted to get the Republican bragging points straight here. So the Republican Party has kept us safe, except for 9/11. Is that the argument? No, really, because you had the worst attack on the American homeland in history, but you`re bragging about your ability to defend the country because you say — you defended America, except for 9/11. That`s your defense, right?

HARRIS: Look, Chris…

MATTHEWS: That`s the bragging point of the Republican Party for the last — I asked you to name one thing they`ve done for this country in 15 to 20 years. I`ll keep going back further. And you`re having a hard time giving me an answer. What has the Republican Party…

HARRIS: No, no. I`m…

MATTHEWS: … done for the country?

HARRIS: I`m not…

MATTHEWS: I`m just — it`s a good question.

HARRIS: Chris, I`m not having…

MCMAHON: Squandered the surplus.

HARRIS: … a hard time giving you an answer.

MCMAHON: Don`t forget, squandered the surplus.

HARRIS: When I decide to write a book about the history of the last 20 years of the Republican Party, I`ll be happy to talk to you about that.

MATTHEWS: No, just give me one…

HARRIS: My job is to win elections — my job is to…

MATTHEWS: Just give me one.

HARRIS: … win elections in 2010.


HARRIS: And I`m going to keep my eye on the ball.

MCMAHON: He doesn`t have one. He doesn`t have one!

Yikes. Harris provided a whole lotta nuthin’.

THIS JUST IN: John Michael Farren, who served as deputy legal counsel to President George W. Bush, has been charged with strangulation and attempted murder after allegedly choking his wife and beating her with a flashlight. It is believed that Farren felt pressure to one-up Dick Cheney’s crime of shooting his friend in the face.

BREAKING NEWS: If the mainstream media is truly liberal, it has done a good job of hiding that fact this week. Most every televised news program at some point this week drew attention to Democratic Party Senators Chris Dodd and Byron Dorgan’s announced retirements and concluded that the party is in real trouble because of the number of vacated seats. The problem is that the media has failed to report the true facts. Those facts are that the Republicans have six Senate incumbents that are not seeking re-election (compared to the two aforementioned Democrats) and fourteen House members doing the same (compared to ten Democrats). Final score: Republicans vacating twenty congressional seats and Democrats vacating twelve. Looks like the Republicans have some real trouble of their own.

THIS JUST IN: Would someone please tell Liz Cheney that nobody cares what she has to say. This week the daughter of the former face-shooter in chief, Dick Cheney decided that she should give her opinion on how the Obama administration should handle terrorism. She should be reminded that she has absolutely no qualifications to comment on that subject.  She would be better served by accompanying the Bush twins on the party scene. Then again, she is probably not very fun to be around.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “Republicans Eating Their Young” features Republican National Committee chairman Michael Steele and wealthy Republican contributors. It appears that the contributors’ lack of faith in Steele is manifesting itself in a dearth of contributions to the RNC. Steele has responded to his Republican critics as follows in an ABC interview:

I’m telling them and I’m looking them in the eye and say I’ve had enough of it. If you don’t want me in the job, fire me. But until then, shut up. Get with the program or get out of the way.

Sounds like the Republican Party is in need of an intervention.

THIS JUST IN: Does anyone else find it a little ironic that although Hanes has terminated actor Charlie Sheen from his endorsement contract as the result of his pending spousal abuse charges, the underwear manufacturer continues to sell “wife-beater” undershirts?

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “Don’t Sugar Coat It, Go Ahead And Tell Us How You Really Feel” features Andrew Sullivan of The who says of Sarah Palin,

But it became almost immediately clear that she knew nothing about anything, had a private life that you usually see hashed out on Judge Judy, covered up her total lack of governing competence with so many lies they were hard to keep track of, and had next-to-no knowledge of any domestic or foreign policy issues, including energy. Isn’t that enough to regard her nomination as a total farce, the biggest insult ever delivered to voters since … well, Dan Quayle, who was far more informed, smart and serious than Palin ever was.

The idea that this person was qualified to run a country in one of its most serious crises, economically and militarily, beggars belief. The recklessness it revealed in McCain showed that he too was simply unqualified for high office, gambling with the core security of the US for cheap tactical advantage.

THIS JUST IN: Vice President Joe O’Biden says to the unemployed Sarah Palin, “Stay away from me lucky charms!” More on the sorry former ex-quitting governor of Alaska tonight on 60 Minutes which will feature a scathing synopsis of the 2008 Palin campaign by McCain campaign official Steve Schmidt.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s edition of “We Can’t Seem To Get Our Heads Out Of Our Asses” features those dimwitted curmudgeons known as Tea-Baggers. In December 2009, the group known as “Tea Party Support” announced the it would be sponsoring the National Conservative Symposium from January 22 – 24 in San Antonio, Texas. The speaker lineup included Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, Michelle Malkin and Laura Ingraham. The event was reported to be a symposium for “true” conservatives and would compete directly with the more celebrated annual CPAC conference which Palin has elected to shun. The price for attendance at the Tea Party event was announced to be $ 749.00.

Unfortunately, the group ran into a little trouble on the way to Texas. The event has now been canceled with no reason for cancellation announced by the group. This is noteworthy because it is the first event that has quit on Sarah Palin before she could quit on it. The cancellation also marks the most recent disaster of the Tea-Bagging campaign. Their “Die-In” event in Washington last December was remarkable only for its lack of attendance and they cannot seem to define what the heck their planned January 20th “strike” or “boycott” is supposed to be. Somebody better read their tea leaves and soon.

OOPS, ALMOST FORGOT: Here We Go Packers, Here We Go !!!

THIS JUST IN: This week’s edition of “Honesty Impaired Fox News Hosts” features Sean “The Cowardly Waterboarding Evader” Hannity. His most recent lie is that the CIA is diverting counter terrorism resources in an attempt to prove the existence of global warming. Hannity said,

The CIA director redirects manpower to monitor climate change, but is it all the cost — at the cost of our security, your security, your family’s security? In the wake of the attempted Christmas Day terror attack, you would think the spies at the CIA, that they would have their hands full securing America. But, believe it or not, assets at Langley are being used for other projects.

Hannity then quoted a National Center For Public Policy Research (NCPPR) press release which said,

As terrorists continue to infiltrate America, the Obama Administration is tasking some of our nation’s most elite intelligence-gathering agencies to divert their resources to environmental scientists researching global warming.

Of course Hannity failed to disclose that the NCPPR is sponsored and funded by the global warming denying Exxon Oil Company. Additionally, he failed to provide the CIA’s response to the ridiculous claim which is,

The monitoring program has little or no impact on regular intelligence gathering, federal officials said, but instead releases secret information already collected or takes advantage of opportunities to record environmental data when classified sensors are otherwise idle or passing over wilderness.

That is OK Mr. Hannity. Do not let the facts get in the way of a good lie. You just go on living in your Faux News fantasy world.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Dear Mr. Fantasy song link:


(sung to the Traffic song “Dear, Mr. Fantasy”)

Dear, Mr. Hannity you are a goon
Some even say you are daffy
Your nightly show is just like a cartoon
Hit that bong, chug that jar
Getting happy
You are the one that just makes us all laugh
Unlike Glenn Beck, you don’t go to tears
You should be sad that you do not have your gonads
You could face waterboarding fears

Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh
Oooo Ahhhhh Ahhhhh

Dear Mr. Hannity you’re no Brit Hume
Although, he too is unhappy
Insanity prevails throughout Fox News
Always wrong, that you are
Oh so crappy
Yeah, yeah

(musical interlude)

Dear Mr. Hannity  go back to your room
That would just make us all happy
Do anything, take us out of our gloom
Sing a song, play guitar
Make it snappy
We all just watch you to have a good laugh
We haven’t laughed so hard in ten years
You are one sad excuse for a real college grad
Just like all of your poor Fox News peers