Simply Stated, Rick Perry Is Too Stupid To Be President

The Republican Presidential field of candidates is fast becoming the most unqualified and ridiculous bunch of coconuts to ever fall out of the tree. Here is what some pundits are saying. “As a Republican, I am panicking”, said Debra Saunders of the San Francisco Chronicle. Philip Klein of the says the field is “incredibly weak” and the candidates are variously “uninspiring, unserious, unprepared, dishonest, unreliable, inexperienced, inconsistent or ideologically malleable,” and not one of them “seems up to the task at hand.” George Will of The Washington Post adds, “has conservatism really come so far, surmounting so many obstacles, to settle, at a moment of economic crisis, for this?”

Consider what we have witnessed even before a single primary vote has been cast. The self-described fiscal conservative Newt Gingrich was discovered to have approximately $1 million in credit charges at upscale jeweler Tiffany & Co. while his campaign is simultaneously approximately $1 million in debt. Ron Paul has advocated that people without health insurance should either rely on the charity of friends or die from lack of medical treatment. Mitt Romney continues to flip-flop by changing his positions on issues on a near daily basis and he believes that “corporations are people.” Rick Santorum believes that the certain result of same sex marriages is sex with dogs. Michele Bachmann believes that the HPV vaccination causes mental retardation and she also believes that her crop of uber-conservative GOP rivals are “frugal socialists.” Herman Cain has more sexual harassment charges levied against him than Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson combined and nobody knows who Jon Huntsman is.

The biggest joke of all however, is Rick Perry. This guy’s ten gallon hat is simply filled with ten gallons of dumb. Take for example, his bizarre stump speech antics last Friday in New Hampshire. His speech was slurred. He made crazy faces. He made odd references. Often times he made no sense at all. It appeared that he was either drunk or overly medicated. It was sad to see a potential Presidential nominee in this condition. It was even more tragic to think that a person such as this could aspire to occupy the highest office in the United States.

Things got even worse at the Republican debate which followed. Perry simply made a fool of himself in front of his GOP opponents, the moderators, the live audience and the television audience. The Texas Governor was asked a question about his tax and spending plan — but completely blew the answer by looking like a complete fool. Perry was listing the three Cabinet agencies he wants to abolish — and forgot the third one. Here is how it transpired:

  • Perry:  And I will tell you it is three agencies of government when i get there that are gone. Commerce, Education, and the — what’s the third one there? Let’s see…Okay. Commerce, Education, and the —”
  • Romney:  EPA?
  • Perry:  EPA, there you go.
  • Moderator:  Seriously, is EPA the one you are talking about?
  • Perry:  No sir, no, sir. We are talking about the  – agencies of government – EPA needs to be rebuilt.
  • Moderator:  You can’t – you can’t name the third one?
  • Perry:  The third agency of government I would – I would do away with education, the Commerce…Commerce and, let’s see. I can’t. The third one, I can’t. Sorry. Oops.

Stick a fork in Rick Perry because, like Herman Cain, he is done!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Wonderful World (Don’t Know Much) song link:


(sung to the Sam Cooke song “Wonderful World”)

Don’t know much about history
Don’t know much ecology
Don’t know much about that climate change
Don’t know why voters think I am strange

But I do know I have no clue
And my brain cells are so very few
What a right wing world this should be

Don’t have much of an education
I know a lot about procreation
Opposition should have no voice
Pregnant women should have no choice

But i do know one thing that is true
Pilgrims came in 1492
What a right wing world this should be

Now I don’t claim to be be an “A” student
Somethings I’ll never be
But maybe my being a “D” student, baby
Lets me revise history

Don’t know much about history
Don’t believe biology
Don’t know much about a science book
Won’t give climate change a second look

But I do know my time is due
And I’ll be there in 2-0-1-2
What a right wing world this will be

(Ponzi Scheme break)

And I do know you’ll love Rick Perry
The new brain-trust of the Tea Party
What a right wing world this will be

Posted on November 10, 2011, in Rick Perry and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. Texas Flood

    “It was like peeing your pants on the last day of school”- Alex Wagner, MSNBC

  2. Love this! and as a commenter on another blog says this morning: Somewhere in Texas, a village is missing its Idiot!

  3. It’s more like peeing in his pants the FIRST day of school! And there’s no good way to recover.

    TX, please collect your idiot. What I find most hilarious is that it was the ***Dept. of Energy*** he forgot–some whore from TX.

  4. Huckadoodle?

    But conservative voters are right about their central arguments against Romney — he is a flip-flopper, he is a slimy politician and he will say anything to get elected. These Republicans are thirsting for a real conservative to vote for. Meanwhile, there has been an absolute implosion of the other conservative candidates. Bachmann lasted about five seconds. Herman Cain is in a tailspin now, but was obviously never qualified to begin with. And Rick Perry might as well have screamed “Allahu Akbar!” as he blew himself up in last night’s debate.

  5. loved this. i’m from texas and absolutely horrified that this guy is being taken seriously on a national stage. a week AFTER this embarrassing showing…
    have to share:

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