Palin’s “Cougar Crush” And Possible Divorce

This week’s episode of “Sarah Palin and her Wasilla Hillbillies” features her husband Todd Palin and her almost son-in-law Levi Johnston. Tune in to witness family intrigue as the entire cast must deal with rumors of Caribou Barbie’s infidelity and the pressures it has placed on the entire Palin clan.

The episode begins as Levi Johnston gives an interview and says that Sarah Palin had a “Cougar Crush” on him. For those of you that may be unfamiliar with that term, it  is defined by UrbanDictionary.com as follows:

“The heart fluttering sensation experienced by women of a certain age upon seeing a man of much younger years, usually sporting six-pack abs, boyish innocence, and a clear willingness to learn. Side effects include: unclean thoughts, raised hemlines, and a deep desire to take on the role of tutor.”

Check out the E Online video here.

Come to think of it, from all that we have heard about Palin, the description seems quite believable. Inasmuch as Levi was sleeping and having a having a baby with the abstinence-only preaching daughter Bristol Palin at the same time, suffice to say that there must have been a lot of sexual tension in Chez Palin.

Scene two involves the allegation that Todd “First Dude” Palin is divorcing the former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska. The Enquirer reports that Todd is “fed up” with the constant scandals surrounding his marriage. The recent book written by author Joe McGinniss, The Rogue: Searching For The Real Sarah Palin reveals that Sarah Palin had a one-night stand with former NBA star Glen Rice just prior to her marriage to Todd Palin as well as a six-month affair with her husband’s business partner, Brad Hanson.

This is certainly “Must See TV” so tune in to every network (except Fox News) this week at prime-time for more salacious details.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody also too.

The Beverly Hillbillies song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_XAPku7SgE&feature=related

THE WASSILLA HILLBILLIES – PART 3

(sung to the theme of “The Beverly Hillbillies”)

Come and listen to a story ‘bout a gal named Sarah
Not too many brains but a whole lot of mascara.
Her hair is in a beehive and she has some lipstick too,
She tried to run for V.P. but she didn’t have a clue.

Knowledge that is,   Bush Doctrine?,    Job of V.P. ?

Well the first thing ya know Obama left her in the dust,
So she joined the Tea Party to engage in some blood-lust
She said, “The Johnston family are so dumb that they just drool”
Then daughter Bristol and Levi dropped right on out of school.

Embarrasment that is,   Birth’n Babies,    Quittin’ Jobs.

Well now its time to say good-bye to Sarah and her kin,
The First Dude and his wife have some wounds that need lick’n.
The whole Palin clan now studies the encyclopedia,
So they can handle “Gotcha Questions” from the “lamestream” media.

Couric, that is.   Charlie Gibson,    Tina Fey..

Y’all come back now, y’hear?

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Posted on September 22, 2011, in Sarah Palin and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. pretty lame

  2. Real Housewives of Wasilla

    David Letterman used Sarah Palin’s recent trip to New York as inspiration for a top ten list. The second “highlight” of Palin’s visit: “Bought makeup at Bloomingdale’s to update her Slutty Flight Attendant look”.

    Governor Palin herself responded to the joke by saying: “Pretty pathetic, good old David Letterman, that old David Letterman, what a commentary there … very sad to not recognize what this trip was all about… such a distortion.” (AP)

  3. Developmentally retarded Wasillabilies. Looking forward to that insurance fraud investigation…..

  4. Egad, the forever soap opera that is all things Palin. Curious that the Quitter Queen has only summoned her dwindling numbers of flying monkeys to attack Mr. McGinniss. You’d think instead she’d be filing a defamation of character lawsuit, but of course that would require that FALSE statements have been made about her!

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