Glenn Beck: Tears of A Rodeo Clown

Yes, that is the proverbial “Fat Lady” who you can hear singing. The show is now officially over. That’s right, we are finally rid of the hate-speak and misinformation-spewing Glenn Beck. Even the Republican propaganda arm known as Fox News finally realized that steadily declining ratings and the continued loss of millions of dollars in free market advertising dictated a divorce between the network and the crazy-man. In the end, even Fox News president Roger Ailes had his limits when it comes to a lost cause.

The break-up came after months of infighting between Beck and the network. The straw that broke the camel’s back however, was the fact that virtually all of the program’s sponsors fled along with their advertising revenue and Beck’s ratings have plummeted by approximately 40%. What show could withstand that type of double-whammy?

During its run, Beck’s show focused primarily on criticizing President Barack Obama. It is interesting to note that the program debuted on Fox News the day before President Obama took office It is also ironic to note that Obama will retain his position at the very least through 2012 while Beck will be long gone from Fox. That alone shows that Beck’s program was a massive “Mission Unaccomplished”. In fact, Glenn Beck’s steady fall from grace began in 2009 when he proclaimed that President Barack Obama has a “deep-seated hatred for white people”. That remark caused such a public backlash that over 300 advertisers pulled their commercials from his program.

Soon thereafter, Beck, the self-described rodeo clown, began to describe wacky conspiracies involving socialists, communists, leftists and Muslims all joining forces to infiltrate the Obama administration and then take down the world. Honestly, even Austin Powers’ arch enemy, the sinister Dr. Evil, could not come up with something that devilish. It appeared that he was having a mental breakdown on a nightly basis before our very eyes. He was reduced to tears more often than John Boehner. His television stage-set resembled the hidden-away attic classroom of an addle-minded professor who has been reduced to spewing unintelligible gibberish and writing inane code on a blackboard in a near empty classroom. His conspiracy theories were so wildly imaginative and unrealistic that even the other Fox hosts such as Bill O’Reilly and Sean Hannity steered well clear of all things Beckian. Simply stated, Glenn Beck had become a raving lunatic and a liability to Fox News.

Fox executives should have realized that Beck spelled trouble from the very beginning. He has no formal education or work experience in the world of politics. Glenn Beck’s college career consisted of ONE COURSE, not one semester mind you, but one course. His radio background consisted of merely a bunch of shock-jock jobs with a number of different stations. Add to that his history of alcohol and drug abuse, and you have a recipe for some kind of on-air nervous breakdown. That is exactly what we and Beck’s bosses seem to have been witnessing.

Don’t believe me? Watch this:

Need more evidence? let’s watch a few more of Beck highlights as well as his final exit:

That my friends is a caseload of canned-crazy. But now it is time to celebrate. This weekend we should celebrate not only the holiday which commemorates our great nation’s independence, but also the final departure of one of our great nation’s craziest wackos from the free public airwaves.

Lynnrockets wishes all of you and your’s a happy, healthy 4th of July Weekend!!!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Tears Of A Clown song link:


 (sung to the Smokey Robinson song “Tears of A Clown”)

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah

Now Fox wiped that smile from Beck’s face
Was only there trying to fool the public
And Glenn was a drug-abusing fool
And honey, since now we’re on the subject
Don’t you let Beck’s sad expression
Lead to misplaced adulation
Really Beck’s mad, and he’s sadder than sad
Beck’s gone and he’s hurtin’ so bad
Like a clown Beck pretends to be glad

Now there’s some mad things ‘bout this man
But ain’t too much sadder than
The tears of this clown, as Beck stumbles around
Uh hum, oh yeah Becky

Now if it appears Fox set him free
It’s only to minimize the badness
They want to conceal that wild-eyed guy
His sponsors all fled due to Beck’s madness
Fox won’t let his show continue
Beck has too many issues
He just had to go, along with his show
Glenn’s hurt and it really does show
That dumb Glenn Beck has lost his mojo, ooh yeah

Now there’s some mad things ‘bout this man
But ain’t too much sadder than
The tears of this clown, as Beck stumbles around
Oh yeah

Just like Liberace did
Glenn Beck lost it and flipped his lid
Telling conspiracy lies
Moisture filling his jaundiced eyes
The tears of a clown
And his faked sobbing sound, oh yeah baby

Yes, Fox wiped that smile from Beck’s face
Look at Ailes’ glad expression
He taught Glenn Beck a lesson
Don’t let the smile Beck wears
Make you think that he don’t care
Cuz really he’s sad…Beck’s hurting so bad…

Posted on July 1, 2011, in Fox News, Glenn Beck and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. Barbarians at the gate

    We’ll just have to make do with Marcus Bachmann. It is a Well-Known Fact that Michele Bachmann hates all the gays. But did you know that her husband is a Christian mental-health-therapist-helper-counselor who can wash that gay right out of your hair? This is a rumor, on the Internets. It IS true that he is a therapist and that he provided some helpful tips for curing the gayness on some wingnut radio show earlier this year! (Wonkette)

  2. YAY! Good riddance to this jerk.

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