Daily Archives: June 10, 2011

Newt Gets The Boot!

Rats fleeing the S.S. Gingrich

The AP is reporting that Newt Gingrich’s campaign manager and numerous other key aides have resigned together. Gingrich press spokesman Rick Tyler told The Associated Press that he’s resigned along with campaign manager Rob Johnson, as well as senior strategists Sam Dawson and Dave Carney. Also quitting were early primary state key consultants Katon Dwason in South Carolina and Craig Schoenfeld in Iowa.

Polico.com reports that one official said the last straw came when Gingrich went forward with taking a long-planned cruise with his wife last week in the Greek isles.

Gingrich of course, stumbled almost immediately out of the gate, after declaring in a May appearance on NBC’s “Meet the Press” that the House Republican budget plan was too “radical” and represented “right-wing social engineering.” It was then revelaed that he had purchased up to half a million dollars worth of jewelry at Tiffany & Company which had lobbied the agency which employed his third wife. Politico.com states that after his bumpy start, rumors began to circulate in the political community the former House speaker’s days as a candidate were numbered. The collective decision by his high command to quit makes it likely that his demise will be hastened.

This is a crushing blow to the thrice-married bling-buying Republican’s hopes for a presidential nomination. So long Newt, we hardly knew ye.

Please remember to click on the song link below before reading the lyrics because it is so much more fun to sing along while the actual song is playing.

You’re A Mean One Mr. Grinch song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzXKWKaxt3c

YOU’RE A HAS-BEEN, NEWT GINGRICH

(sung to the Dr. Seuss song “The Grinch That Stole Christmas”)

You’re a has-been, Newt Gingrich
You’re lacking in appeal
Your were ousted as The Speaker
No one wants to hear you squeal
Newt Gingrich

You’re a unicycle
Without even one wheel

You’ve had three wives, Newt Gingrich
A mistress in the hole
Philandering’s your day job
You’re a slimy ugly troll
Newt Gingich

These woman that like you, must
Be on work release or parole

You’re a vile one, Newt Gingrich
Your words reek with rancid bile
Your criticism of Bill Clinton
As you’re cheating all the while
Newt Gingrich

There couldn’t be a bigger hypocrite
Within a Midwest country mile

You’re a foul one, Newt Gingrich
Your first divorce smelled of skunk
Your wife, Jackie fighting cancer
You told her she was junk
Newt Gingrich

The nicest words to describe you,
Are, as follows, and I quote, Pink. Wank, Punk

You’re a coward, Newt Gingrich
Avoided your army spot
Deferment-seeking chicken-hawk
That likes to talk real tough
Newt Gingrich

Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing
With the most disgraceful assortment of Republican
Sound-bytes imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots

You’re the racist, Newt Gingrich
It’s not Judge Sotomayor
You play the race card as a white guy
That’s so laughable I’m sure
Newt Gingrich

You’re a stinking pile of vomit
Sitting in the sun
With feces on top

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