Palin’s Midnight Ride Through Historical Inaccuracy And Revisionism

Those are Sarah Palin’s words spoken while in Boston, the Cradle of Liberty last week. Let’s try to decipher that word salad, shall we?

“He who warned uh, the British that they weren’t gonna be takin’ away our arms, uh by ringing those bells, and um, makin’ sure as he’s riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells that we were going to be sure and we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed.”

“He who warned uh, the British that they weren’t gonna be takin’ away our arms, uh by ringing those bells”. OK, first of all the purpose of Paul Revere’s ride was NOT to warn the British about anything. It was intended to be a secret mission in which Revere was to inform Hancock and Adams that the British were advancing on them. That is why the silent communication of lanterns was utilized. Indeed, during his ride to notify Colonists, Revere was often cautioned to remain very quiet. At no time was Revere “ringing those bells”.

She also said, “as he’s riding his horse through town to send those warning shots and bells.” Again, Revere never rode through town ringing bells or sending warning shots. His ride was to be conducted surreptitiously because of the fear of spies in colonial ranks.

Palin also said that the purpose of the ride was to warn the British “we were going to be free, and we were going to be armed.” No, this was not the purpose. After completing his ride, Revere was captured by British soldiers. They held a gun to his head and said that they would blow his brains out if he did not confess the Colonists’ plans. Paul Revere then told them what he had done under threat of death. At no time prior to or during his ride did he intentionally warn the British of anything. As for the bells and musket shots, it was the Colonists who used that form of signal to instruct each other that it was time to amass. That happened however, after the ride was completed and Paul Revere had been apprehended.

These facts come directly from the official history posted at The Paul Revere House and from Paul Revere’s personal diary.

In the next few weeks you will read and hear a lot of Palin apologists attempting to revise what she said to more accurately reflect what really happened in 1775. Do not believe any of it and force them to use Palin’s own words to defend their assertions. Do not be persuaded by any unqualified pseudo-historians that Fox News is certain to trot out. Fox will never reveal that those folks will have had a history of either defending Palin or the conservative right. Remind them that Palin has a long history of getting historical facts completely wrong.

Remember, this is also the fool who said that the founding fathers recited the Pledge of Allegiance at their meetings when in fact, the pledge was not even written until more than 100 years later. She also said, that Susan B. Anthony opposed abortion by saying, “Susan B. Anthony saw the fight for the rights of the unborn as part of the broader fight for women’s rights.” She also said that the First amendment defends against media attacks!

Bill Maher summed up the Palin situation best when he said, “Sarah Palin should not be on summer vacation. She should be in summer school.”

In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

Johnny B. Goode song link:


 (sung to the Chuck Berry song “Johnny B. Goode”)

While visiting ol’ Boston in designer jeans
Sarah Palin told us what the “Midnight Ride” means
While at the Old North Church in Paul Revere’s hood
It all became quite clear just what she understood
She never ever learned to read or write so well,
And boy what a whopper of a tale she did tell

Go, Go,   Go, Sarah Go, Go
Go Sarah Go   Go
Go Sarah Go   Go
Go Sarah Go   Go
Palin, she’s good

She told us Paul Revere warned the Brits of our attack
By firing warning shots to make them go back
Oh, and he was ringing bells while riding through glen and glade
You just wouldn’t believe all the damn racket he made
People he passed by they would stop and say,
“What happened to the lanterns in the church today?”

Go, Go,   Go, Sarah Go, Go
Go Sarah Go   Go
Go Sarah Go   Go
Go Sarah Go   Go
Palin, she’s good

(publicity stunt break)

Revisionism is the Sarah Palin plan
She wants the children’s history books to be banned
Palin cannot tell a verb from a noun
But she knows men used to ride dinosaurs around
She thinks Ben Franklin discovered the kite
Do you think that she could be right?

Go, Go,   Go, Sarah Go
Go, Go, Go Sarah Go
Go, Go, Go Sarah Go
Go, Go, Go Sarah Go
Go, Palin, she’s good.

Posted on June 6, 2011, in Sarah Palin, Songs and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.

  1. JAYSUS! She’s such a moron!

    Good work on the post and song. Can we send her to Syria or Libya or some other hot spot where she can show what a great “shot” she is?

  2. Panic Stations

    Mama Grifter was forced into an emergency Fox guest appearance and had to made do with the Sunday host who insisted on having a good laugh at her, or at the whole fiasco- it wasn’t clear.

    Wonkette has the story: “She admitted that, yeah, okay, the Revere guy was trying to warn Americans that the British were coming, sure, but that in doing so, Revere was also mysteriously trying to warn the British. He was just cold warning anything in his path.”

    Case closed.

  3. In her refusal to admit her mistake Sunday (what a surprise) on Fox with Chris Wallace she claimed it was a ‘gotcha’ question. The question she was asked:

    “What have you seen so far today and what are you going to take away from your visit?”

    For cryin’ out loud, asking her what day it is would be a gotcha question!!

    Watching the video of her Paul Revere debacle, you can see the vacant stare while the neurons are firing furiously but not hitting anything in that vacant skull of hers, and then of course she goes into her annoying sing-song voice, surprised she didn’t add a wink and tongue flick. The arrogance of DOPE.

  4. When Germany’s Angela Merkel is in Washington on Tuesday, President Obama should ask her to explain how her country manages to succeed with jobs and exports despite high taxes and welfare.

  5. I do not want to hear Palin ever again complain about the media…they cater to her every lie, and smile while doing it. She is a moron…period. She does not deserve her millions, her RV, her celebrity…what has she ever done to earn that money? She talks about hard work all the time…can’t be too hard to wear designer clothes and run around in a moving 5 star hotel between visits to 5 star hotels, paid for my her followers. Gawd…she is such a does she sleep at night?

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