Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 78

Just a few newsworthy items (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week but may have escaped your attention. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS:  Former U.S. Sen. George Mitchell (a Bowdoin College alum I might add) is resigning as the Obama administration’s Mideast envoy. Mitchell played a key role in Clinton-era negotiations regarding the status of Northern Ireland that resulted in the Good Friday Peace Agreement. This is not good news.

THIS JUST IN:  In the latest AP poll, 60% of respondents said they approved of Barack Obama‘s job performance, compared to 39% who disapproved. That’s the best rating Obama has received since May 2009 when, riding high after his inauguration, 64% of Americans approved of his job performance. This is good news.

BREAKING NEWS:  In other polling news, Public Policy Polling, found Donald Trump garnering only 8 percent of potential Republican primary voters, down from 26 percent who said they would support him if he ran in PPP’s previous survey. That plunge in support was enough to drop him from a solid first place to a tie for fifth place. So much for The Donald and his birther obsession!

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of “Fighting The Good Fight” features Bernie Sanders and Jim McDermott. Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) announced this week that he introduced legislation to provide health care for every American through a Medicare-for-all type single-payer system. Rep. Jim McDermott (D-Wash.) filed a companion bill in the House to provide better care for more patients at less cost by eliminating the middle-man role played by private insurance companies that rake off billions of dollars in profits. The twin measures, both called the American Health Security Act of 2011, would provide federal guidelines and strong minimum standards for states to administer single-payer health care programs.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Really Distorted And Creepy Remakes Of School-House Rock” features failed 2008 GOP candidate for President, Mike Huckabee and his “Learn Our History” cartoon series. Have a look:

Sure makes you pine for “Conjunction Junction” doesn’t it?

THIS JUST IN: The Tea Party Patriots are advocating an initiative to pressure public schools into teaching the US Constitution based on the writings of W. Cleon Skousen who has suggested such outlandish things as slaves being a happy bunch of folks. MotherJones.com however, informs us that Doug Kendall, President of the Constitutional Accountability Center (a think tank and public interest law firm) is none to happy about this development. He says,

“I defy the Tea Party Patriots to find one credible historian willing to support their view of the Constitution’s history. Before the Tea Party gets to go into school and teach our children about the Constitution, they need to find a tenured professor on the history faculty on one of any of the 50 highest-rated universities in the United States who will vouch for the accuracy of their teachings. To qualify to teach America’s children about the Constitution you need to do more than dress up like James Madison.

The Tea Party Patriots are peddling constitutional gobbledygook masquerading as history. Yet whether it is Tea Party organizations misrepresenting American history, or Tea Party politicians like Rep. Michele Bachmann not knowing what state the battles of Lexington and Concord were fought in, the Tea Party has utterly disqualified itself from serious discussion of our Constitution’s text and history. America’s school boards must flatly reject the Tea Party Patriots’ attempts to muscle their bad history into our children’s classrooms.”

Bravo, Mr. Kendall!

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Republicans Behaving Badly” features the recently resigned GOP Sen. John Ensign. NPR.org reports, “Former Sen. John Ensign of Nevada broke federal law, made false statements to the Federal Election Commission and obstructed a Senate Ethics Committee’s investigation into his conduct, the panel said Thursday in a scathing report that sent the matter to the Justice Department for possible prosecution.” Ouch, that is gonna leave a mark!

THIS JUST IN:  Former failed GOP presidential candidate Mike Huckabee(Hound) announced last night that he will not run again in 2012. He joins other Republican scaredy-cats Haley Barbour, Marco Rubio, Chris Christy, Jeb Bush, Jim Demint, Bobby Jindal and Sarah Palin.

BREAKING NEWS:  This week’s episode of “I Double Dare You” features New jersey high school student Amy Myers who is is challenging Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) to a debate on civics and the U.S. Constitution. In an open letter to to Bachmann, Myers of Cherry Hill, N.J., said, “I have found quite a few of your statements regarding The Constitution of the United States, the quality of public school education and general U.S. civics matters to be factually incorrect, inaccurately applied or grossly distorted.” “I, Amy Myers, do hereby challenge Representative Michele Bachmann to a Public Forum Debate and/or Fact Test on The Constitution of the United States, United States History and United States Civics.” I’ll take Myers in this one!

THIS JUST IN:  After President Obama announced that he would not release photos of the slain Osama bin Laden because the terrorist “is not a trophy” and “we (i.e the US) do not need to spike the football” and because it would inflame the Muslim world and endanger our troops, conservative windbag Ann Coulter felt the need to speak up. While appearing on Sean Hannity’s Fox News (where else?) program, Coulter chastised the President and said, “We paid for it, we ought to be able to see it.” He then went on to insult the president by saying, “he seems to know less about Arabs than, you know, my dog. Certainly, this Irishman from Long Island knows more.” Who in the wide, wide world of Fox News is “the the Irishman from Long island”? He then wondered off into the ridiculous by saying, ” he’s spiking the football from now until Election Day on this. So, don’t talk down to us about your moral superiority, we don’t need a victory lap. That’s beyond us. And Americans can’t handle this? I think Americans just handled what you showed on your program. And if Americans can handle Hillary Clinton’s ankles, they can handle this photo.” Hilary Clinton’s ankles? Really, can this guy ever have a conversation without delving into the inane? Ann Coulter just might be the shallowest man in America.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Lola song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WJiHp-2CmVY

COULTER

(sung to the Kinks song “Lola”)

I saw her once last week on the Fox network
Where the hosts are lame and the guests are worse like Ann Coulter
She is a revolter
A big Adam’s Apple and masculine hands
She has the curves of a flagpole and a set of big huge molars
M-o-l-a molars mo-mo-mo-mo molars

It might be the world’s most unfunny joke
But if he’s a lady then my glasses are broke
That Ann Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Well I’m not dumb but I can’t understand
Why he walks like a woman but looks like a man
That Ann Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter

Well he sat right next to Hannity
And then was on Bill O’Reilly
They saw mascara on his eyes so blue
But I swear those guys didn’t have a damn clue
Well I don’t know if they are into men
But the next night on Fox he was on there again that Ann Coulter
Co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter

I changed the station
M-S-N-B-C
Re-luct-ant-ly
I then turned back to Fox
Then I was convinced she was a he

Well I don’t know what ol Rush Limbaugh thinks
But I like women, not some missing link-like Ann Coulter
Co-co-co-co Coulter’s
he says that her wisdom sells his books
It’s gotta be somethin’ cuz it ain’t his good looks that Ann Coulter
Co-co-co-co Coulter

I took a closer look at Hannity
Now I’m not really so sure that he’s not a she
But this might be the Republican way
A sex change is good cuz then you’re not gay

Well I’m not the world’s most masculine man
And I do not possess giant, hairy man-hands
Like that Mann Coulter
Co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter

(fade)

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Posted on May 15, 2011, in Ann Coulter, Barack Obama, Fox News, John Ensign, Michele Bachmann, Mike Huckabee, Sean Hannity, Tea Party and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Buzzkill

    These gory Republican fanatics are so bloodthirsty! If Coulter is so anxious for some of the old ultra-violence let her rent a copy of Mel Gibson’s “The Passion of Christ”.

    But, more importantly, what about the treasure trove of porn- modern, electronically recorded video according to UPI- we found on computers in the fortified compound? Yes, we paid for that too!

    Of course it would be unseemly to gloat- mustn’t endanger the troops- but Palin is absolutely right: “Release internet porn links! No pussy-footing around, no politicking, no drama; it’s part of the mission.”

  2. Billy Connolly weighs in
    (graphic language)

  3. Graphic language is what’s needed sometimes.

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