Daily Archives: February 3, 2011

The Alternative Universe Known As Fox News

Oh, where to begin?  If you are brave enough to ever tune into the Teapublican propaganda network known as Fox News, you will quickly realize that it is like visiting a parallel universe. Sort of a mirror image of the world we live in but where most things like logic, history and facts are diametrically opposite from those in our reality. You know, like when you gaze into the looking glass and notice that your left hand appears to be on the right and your hair is parted on the other side of your head? That is the world of the Fox News host and guests.

As evidence of this alternative reality, let’s take a gander at some of the things that happened in just the last week or so in the world of Fox. There was the absolute meltdown by Bill O’Reilly when milquetoast liberal Alan Colmes refused to sit idle when O’Reilly and co-host Monica Crowley (who, by the way, is Colmes sister-in-law) unequivocally said that members of the far left in this country are anti-American. The context of the discussion was criticism by O’Reilly and Crowley of former ABC News anchor Sam Donaldson when he praised Al Jazeera for continuing to cover the Egyptian uprising. Noting that Egypt had shut down Al Jazeera, Colmes said to O’Reilly and Crowley, “I would think a populist like you would support Al Jazeera and freedom of the press… I would think that as a journalist, you would take the side of Al Jazeera.” O’Reilly countered that his beef with Al Jazeera was its lack of balance, that there was never anyone on to counter its anti-American message. Oh, you can just taste the irony of a Fox host complaining about the imbalance of coverage on a news network. The next time that Glenn Beck or Sean Hannity has a credible Democratic guest on their programs to counter their criticisms of Barack Obama or Nancy Pelosi or Harry Reid will be the very first time. The best part of the program was when Colmes asked both O’Reilly and Crowley to specifically name a person on the far left who is anti-American and neither could or was willing to do so. Let’s go to the tape.

So let’s get this straight, O’Reilly and Crowley do not like Al Jazeera because it spreads propaganda and is not “fair and balanced”. Hmmm.

Next up, we have the aforementioned Glenn Beck. We really shouldn’t expect much sense from Beck in that his college education consisted of one course. Not one year or one semester mind you, ONE COURSE. If that were not enough to disqualify him from being considered a qualified news source, consider his multiple marriages and confessed drug and alcohol addiction as an indication of his lack of self control and commitment. This week Beck too chimed in on the Egyptian uprising and boy oh boy did he come up with the conspiracy theory to beat all conspiracy theories. In short, he stated that the long-oppressed Egyptian people are in the streets protesting an autocratic leader because of a plan written in The Coming Insurrection, which is an obscure book that French police believe was written by a member of a small group of anarchists. He then claims that the result of the Egyptian protest will be….Oh, let’s just read it in Beck’s own words…

I believe that I can make a case in the end that there are three powers that you will see really emerge. One, a Muslim caliphate that controls the Mideast and parts of Europe. Two, China, that will control Asia, the southern half of Africa, part of the Middle East, Australia, maybe New Zealand, and God only knows what else. And Russia, which will control all of the old former Soviet Union bloc, plus maybe the Netherlands. I’m not really sure. But their strong arm is coming. That leaves us and South America. What happens to us?

These are nothing other than the crazed rantings of a delusional person. Thus, they are the perfect stuff to broadcast on Fox News. Is it any wonder that Glenn Beck has lost virtually all of his sponsors and at least a third of his audience in the last year?

Shall we move on to Sean Hannity? His take on the certain outcome of the Egyptian uprising is that there cannot be a resultant democracy. In fact he said that the only popular uprising he knows of which has ever resulted in a democracy was in Iraq. Now putting aside for the moment the fact that there was no “popular uprising” in Iraq and that actually the United States invaded Iraq and toppled its government, Hannity is still an imbecile when it comes to historical uprisings. Indeed, it took comedian Stephen Colbert to remind him of the popular uprisings in the Czech Republic, India, France, Poland, East Germany and THE UNITED STATES, all of which resulted in democracies.

Over at Fox News they certainly have a strange crew that has been drinking some strange brew. I bet you Rocketeers can guess where this one is going!

“Strange Brew” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_NholHANoY

STRANGE CREW

(sung to the Cream song “Strange Brew”)

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

Does that Sean Hannity have a new hairdo?
And will Bill O’Reilly go back on “The View”
No clue
And what will Glenn Beck do?

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

There’s a long-faced sullen man that’s named Brit Hume
And a blonde-haired guy named Ann Coulter, too
Pee-you
That’s just to name a few

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

(Misinformation break)

They have a dumb Alaskan known as Sarah P.
And a weekend wimp named Mike Huckabee
Good Lord
Could they be more abhorred?

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

Strange crew, strange crew
Strange crew, strange crew

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News