Daily Archives: January 28, 2011

All Things Palin Are In Decline

Oh, where do we begin? Things have been going so poorly for the Palin clan of late that it is difficult to find a suitable starting point to chronicle all of their misfortune and bad publicity.

Sarah Palin appeared to be at the apex of her popularity sometime during the summer months of 2010. She was at the forefront of the Tea Party ascension as she bestowed endorsements like blessings upon a plethora of “Mama Grizzlies” in anticipation of the mid-term elections. By the end of the summer, she was all the rage as her very own reality television series was being endlessly promoted. The Queen of Quit was also teasing everyone with the possibility that she might run for President in 2012. Her guest host appearances on Fox News (where else) were increasing. Soon thereafter, daughter Bristol also, too was appearing in a reality television series known as “Dancing With The Stars”. Let’s face it folks, in the latter half of 2010 it was “all Palins, all the time.”

Suddenly however, Palin power and influence took a turn for the worse. Most of Sarah’s  more prominent and controversial “Mama Grizzlies” such as Christine “Witchy Woman” O’Donnell, Sharron “2nd Amendment Remedies” Angle, Linda “Women Are Sex Objects” McMahon, Carly “Worst CEO in History” Fiorina and Meg “Illegal Housekeeper” Whitman lost in the mid-term general elections. Her more prominent and controversial male “Papa Grizzlies” such as John “Lasers In The Sky” Raese, Tom “Bomb Mecca” Tancredo, Ken “No Abortion For Rape Victims” Buck and Dino “Repeal Wall Street Reform” Rossi also lost. Perhaps the biggest blow to Palin however, was that she could not influence the voters of her home state of Alaska to vote for Joe “Dump Social Security” Miller. He lost to a write in candidate of all things. In short, the nation’s voters “refudiated” Sarah Palin.

After the mid-term elections, Sarah Palin began to suffer a steady decline in national polls. The one-time “most popular Governor” began to witness her “approval” numbers drop more quickly than the snow in Alaska. Indeed, as of January 19, 2011 her approval rating descended to an all-time low of 19% according to a CBS/New York Times poll of registered voters.

Worse yet, prominent members of her own Republican Party began to publicly criticize her. Karl Rove stated that Palin lacked the “gravitas” to be President. Newt Gingrich said, “she keeps lowering the bar for herself.” Former First Lady Barbara Bush said she hopes Palin stays in Alaska. Her very first “Baby Grizzly”, Senator Scott Brown (D-MA) said he would not vote for her for president. Even co-worker Mort Kondracke over at uber-friendly Fox News said, “She’s a joke even within her own party. The idea that she would be the presidential nominee is unthinkable.”

In the meantime, Bristol Palin got caught up in a controversy of her own. It was alleged by many that despite the fact that she lacked the dancing skills of many other contestants on DWTS, she continued to survive only because of Palinbot robo-voting. Of course Bristol ultimately lost.

Palin popularity took its worst hit on January 8, 2011 when Democratic Rep. Gabrielle Giffords and several others were gunned down in Tucson, Arizona when a deranged lunatic exercised his “2nd Amendment remedies.” The previous March Sarah Palin used a sniper-sight symbol-laden ad which targeted Giffords’ district and  identified Giffords by name on what is now universally considered to be an ill-conceived campaign prop. It was obvious that Palin would now be linked (fairly or unfairly) to that tragedy forever. She made things worse when she attempted to rehabilitate her image via a self-produced video which is now known as her “I Was The Real Victim Of The Tucson Massacre” speech. That video resonated so poorly with Americans that Fox News‘ Sean Hannity unsuccessfully attempted to have Palin talk her way out of it on his program a few nights thereafter.

The Palin family’s bad news continues. First Sarah Palin was crushed by potential rival Mitt Romney in a New Hampshire straw poll which was heavily attended by Tea Partiers. Next, it was Michele Bachmann (R-MN) and not Palin (Q-AK) that was selected to provide the official Tea Party response to the President’s State of the Union Address. Then, last week the National Enquirer reported that husband Todd Palin was a frequent recipient of massages and possibly more from an Alaskan prostitute. Daughter Bristol was then invited and then rejected by Washington University in St. Louis to discuss sexual abstinence at an event scheduled for next month. University students were outraged that student union funds were to be paid to a non-college educated unwed pregnant teen in an effort to “teach” college students about abstinence. Sarah Palin then elected to provide her own response to the State of the Union Address, but in an attempt to cleverly mock the President’s “win the future” tagline, she resorted to refer to it by means of her potty-mouthed “WTF” (gee, I wonder what she meant by that) acronym. Once again, she has been roundly criticized for her vocabulary.

Finally, and potentially most damaging of all is the news that Alaska officials must release by May 31, 2011 an estimated 26,500 pages of personal emails exchanged between the former ex-quitting half-term Governor and her aides. The records release comes after nearly three years. The initial request was made by news entities back when Ms. Palin was running for vice president with Arizona U.S. Senator John McCain. The request includes emails between Ms. Palin and her husband, Todd, who was accused of wielding inappropriate governmental powers. MSNBC (the initial plaintiff in the lawsuit which sought the email release) plans to “post the e-mails online in a searchable archive” in effect, WikiLeaking Sarah Palin. It has been alleged and/or hinted by some Alaskan bloggers that the emails may just be the tip of the iceberg which sinks the good ship Palin as well as her dream of a political future.

The year 2011 is not shaping-up well for Team Palin. Will there be more bad news arising? I bet you Rocketeers can guess where this is leading!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.
“Bad Moon Rising” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iktMZy0CG30

BAD NEWS ARISING

(sung to the Creedence Clearwater Revival song “Bad Moon Rising”)

Palin sees bad news arising
She sees trouble on the way
She will stick to her lyin’
Emails are on the way

Sarah’s in a plight
And it’s bound to cause her strife
There’s some bad news on the rise

Palin’s secrets will be showin’
We know her end is coming soon
Soon all of us will be knowin’
Palin is a disgrace and ruined

Sarah’s in a plight
And it’s bound to cause her strife
There’s some bad news on the rise
Alright!

(email scrubbing break)

We will be thrilled to forget her
Palin will have tears in her eyes
Looks like she’s in for nasty weather
She’ll be exposed by all her lies

Well, Sarah’s in a plight
And it’s bound to cause her strife
There’s some bad news on the rise

Sarah’s in a plight
And it’s bound to cause her strife
There’s some bad news on the rise