Sarah Palin’s Battle Hymn Of The Teapublic

"Gosh darn, I smudged my crib-notes while massaging Todd!"

It has been awfully quiet on the Palin-front since the National Enquirer published its “First Dude In A Kinky Mood” story late last week. To date, there has been no Sarah Palin response to that embarrassing tale. Indeed, all we have heard from the Queen of Quit is that she will be speaking at some Christian school in Texas and we read her possibly ghost-written book-report about the lifeguard days of Ronald Reagan which appeared in The USA Today. Oh yes, we also learned that she was crushed by Mit(wit) Romney in the New Hampshire straw poll. When will the former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska emerge from her den to reveal if her shadow will doom us to 6 more weeks of silence? Sarah, come out, come out wherever you are!

Other than “Massage-Gate”, the only entertaining thing to emerge about Sarah Palin in the last week or so is that video of the two crazy Palinistas performing their re-working of “The Battle Hymn of the Republic” (see below) which has been drawing a ton of interest on Youtube. You can only work with what material you have, so please enjoy this re-re-working of “The Battle Hymn of the Republic” in true Lynnrockets fashion.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Sarah Palin’s Hymn song video: 


(sung to the “Battle Hymn Of The Republic”)

She’s a moonbat from Alaska
She has a ten foot fence
She’s not a Harvard lawyer cuz she has no common sense
A jack-ass from the North
For which we can blame Johnnie Mack
Palin and her Tea Party are always on attack

Sarah Palin should be locked up in a trunk
Sarah Palin talks just like a skid-row drunk
Sarah Palin is such an epic fail
And when she reads her palm it’s like a blind girl without Braille

Sarah has the wisdom of a crack-head sidewalk whore
Keeps throwing out “Ya Betchas” in her “Mama Grizzly” roar
She is known to substitute her lies for certain facts
Palin and the Tea Party are just a bunch of hacks

Sarah Palin, her election hopes are sunk
Sarah Palin’s “death panel” lies were debunked
Sarah Palin, she spells just like Dan Quayle
Her dreams of seeing Washington have all now been derailed

Palin’s White House dreams are now nightmares from the past
But Tina Fey and company would have had a blast
Now she’ll ride off with Todd on his brand new Ski-Doo
Sarah’s rosy lips will turn blue and cold
If Palin ever gave us anything,
It was just a great big case of heartburn, Sarah knows.

(Really awkward pause)

Sarah’s now long gone….

Closing Dedication:
“I’d like to dedicate this to Tom Brady and the Patriots!!!”

Posted on January 24, 2011, in Sarah Palin, Songs, Todd Palin and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. You nailed the lyrics, lynnrockets. She does talk like a skid-row drunk. Bravo!

  2. Cowgirl in the sand

    According to recent polls in Texas, Huckabee would defeat Obama by 16 points, a more lopsided victory than John McCain had there in 2008. Romney has a 7 point advantage over the President. A plurality of voters have an unfavorable opinion of Newt Gingrich but he would lead Obama by a 5 point margin nonetheless. It’s a whole different story with Palin though. A majority of Texas voters have an unfavorable opinion of her and she leads the President by just a single point in a hypothetical contest. (From the Daily Dish)

    • That is quite embarrassing to Palin inasmuch as Richard Nixon would beat Obama in backwards Texas by at least 15 points.

      • Nixon wouldn’t fare very well nowadays!
        Relations with China (Communist!), no tax cuts for the rich (Class warfare!), paying for the Vietnam war instead of cutting Social Security (Socialist!), Strategic Arms Limitations (Traitor-where’s the birth certificate?) the EPA (Tree-hugging Nazi!).

  3. Thank you for keeping so many of us entertained. Look forward to you one day publishing a Palin Song Book. It would be a best seller, do doubt.

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