Daily Archives: October 6, 2010

Thin-Skinned Palin To Run For POTUS?

First of all, Lynnrockets would like to give credit where credit is due for the content of this post. One of the best Alaska blogs in the entire blogosphere, The Mudflats, broke a story yesterday afternoon which hints that an email sent by Todd “Former First Dude” Palin may suggest that Sarah “Queen of Quit” Palin is considering a run for the office of President of the United States.

So as not to steal any thunder from The Mudflats, please read the entire juicy story there. We will simply provide a brief historical background of Todd’s email and a few select quotes therefrom as a set-up for today’s song parody. So, hang on to your seats, as away we go…

You will all remember that Sarah Palin (while wearing her crown as de-facto Queen of the Tea-Baggers) endorsed a very unknown Tea Party candidate named Joe Miller in the Alaskan Republican Senate primary race against heavily favored incumbent Republican Senator (and Palin antagonist) Lisa Murkowski. Well, against all odds, Miller won the primary election and consequently, he is now one of the Tea Party darlings of Fox News. That however, is how a lot of trouble began brewing between Miller and Palin.

You see, the love between Palin and Miller is not mutual. Despite the fact that Palin’s endorsement of Miller was highly instrumental in his primary election victory, Miller will not return the favor by expressing his support of her in a potential White House run. We know this because Miller appeared on Fox News (where else, right?) and when asked if he thought Palin was qualified to be President, he meekly responded only that, “there are a number of great candidates out there.” Not exactly a full fledged endorsement by any stretch of the imagination.

Now this is where the fun begins. Shortly after the Fox News interview was aired, Todd Palin sent an email to the SarahPAC Treasurer (and a bunch of people you can learn more about in the Mudflats post) instructing him to

“Hold off on any letter for Joe. Sarah put her ass on the line for Joe and yet he can’t answer a simple question ‘Is Sarah Palin Qualified to be President’. I DON’T KNOW IF SHE IS.”

Todd then addressed Miller directly in the same email and asked,

“Joe, please explain how this endorsement stuff works, is it to be completely one sided.”

Just what was Todd implying when he asked if “endorsement(s)” were to be “completely one sided”? Was he implying that Sarah Palin was seeking a mutual endorsement from Miller? If so, then for what purpose? Is she planning on running for President? Please do tell, Sarah. Enquiring minds want to know.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Born To Run song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IxuThNgl3YA


(sung to the Bruce Springsteen song “Born To Run”)

In the day she sweats it out on the streets, she’s a runner-up beauty pageant queen
At night she tears her hair out in worry atop Todd’s snow-machine
Hate filled rages at the five and dime
High heeled, misdirected and sporting a sixties beehive, Whoa
Wasilla town hopes she never comes back
She’s a dumb quack, a political hack
Sarah speaketh with a forked tongue
But tramps like her, baby they were born to run
(yes she will run)

Sarah’s got thin skin but she’ll run again
She can’t find work on television
SarahPAC will cater to her whims
Their dedicated to her mission
Together they will dish out crap
She’ll run till she drops, maybe from a heart attack, Whoa
All her friends, she’ll continue to hire
‘cause baby she wants to be the next “Decider”
But her wagon has lost all its wheels
She behaves like a little child girl, a pitbull refusing to heel
(full of baloney)

(instrumental interlude)

She’s filled with malice right down to the bones buried in her backyard
She casts no reflection in brand new mirrors
Like a vampire caught off guard
Her unfeeling heart, rises cold and dark
A dominatrix with an iron fist
She’s gonna try to befriend thee in the deep dark night
With a wink and a blown kiss, Huhh

(another instrumental)

(one two three four…)

She’s got a bunch of Fox News zeroes that fuel her hopes and drive
Sarah Palin likes you if you are white and have no use for gay pride
Every Wednesday she will give an address
That will reveal all the madness in her soul, Whoa
Someday girl, we don’t know when, you’ll learn that you’re a disgrace
Something we already know, her career will be done
But till then just like puss, Sarah will return to run

Oh, Sarah just like puss, baby we hope that you run

Please believe me, all of us baby, sure hope that you will run