Daily Archives: September 19, 2010
Just a few newsworthy events (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!
BREAKING NEWS: You have got to love Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell (D). He has canceled a $125,000 contract with a consulting firm that sent a bulletin to the state’s Office of Homeland Security in which it described opponents of natural gas drilling as “environmental extremists” and suggested they were a threat to the state. Rendell told reporters in a news conference on Tuesday (Sept. 15) that Pennsylvania would cancel its deal with the firm, the Institute of Terrorism Response and Research, which also identified animal rights demonstrations and anti-war events as potential security threats to the state. Good for you Ed! No use wasting the taxpayers’ money on that group of conservative thugs.
THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Republican Gifts To Democrats” features Christine O’Donnell. She is the Tea Party/Sarah Palin endorsed anti-masturbation, gay bashing, college degree feigning, debt evading Republican candidate for a Delaware Senate seat. As the result of an influx of out of state Tea-Bagger money and the highly publicized Palin endorsement, O’Donnell defeated the party backed Mike Castle. As the result of her primary win however, the Democratic Party candidate Chris Coons, now leads by double digits in a race that was a Republican lock had Castle won. Thanks guys!
BREAKING NEWS: Speaking of Christine O’Donnell and Sarah Palin, the “Queen of Quit” just gave some new advise to the “Sexless Sweetheart”. Sarah Palin appeared on the O’Reilly Factor Wednesday night and ordered O’Donnell to follow the Palin game-plan of refusing to submit to un-screened interviews and to only “speak through FOX News and let the Independents who are tuning in to you, let them know what it is that she stands for, the principles behind her positions.” As we always say, there is nothing like a friendly uninformed audience to lull you into thinking you have no detractors.
THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Hate is Great” features Glenn Beck. Think Progress reports, that ever “[s]ince First Lady Michelle Obama unveiled her Let’s Move! program to fight obesity, conservatives have portrayed the effort as a government assault on personal freedoms and liberties.Glenn Beck joined the act, criticizing Michelle Obama for encouraging restaurants to “offer healthier versions of the foods that we all love.” He also joked that fat people should die:”
BECK: When I heard this I thought, get your damn hands off my fries, lady. If I want to be a fat fat fatty and shovel French Fries all day long, that is my choice. But oh oh, not so fast anymore. Because now we have the new fact, whether you like it or not, we have government health care now. … You know those fat people sitting on their couches? And I mean really fat. I don’t mean not like me. I mean the people who’s skin grows into the couch. … I say let them die. I say punish the person who’s been bringing them the milk shakes that allowed them to eat and not get up off the couch. Am I too harsh?
No Glenn, you are simply clinically insane.
BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Republicans Eating Their Young” co-stars Rush “To Judgment” Limbaugh and Karl “Turd Blossom” Rove. TPM Muckraker reports that we can now “[a]dd Rush Limbaugh to the list of prominent conservatives tearing into Karl Rove’s hide.” Rove, you may remember, went public last week with his criticism of the aforementioned Chritine O’Donnell. He said “I’ve met her. I wasn’t frankly impressed by her abilities as a candidate.” He also said, “One thing that O’Donnell is now going to have to answer in the general election that she didn’t in the primary is her own checkered background.” And Rove followed that up with, “There were a lot of nutty things she has been saying that don’t add up. Why did she mislead voters about her college education? How come it took nearly two decades to pay her college bills so she could get her college degree? How did she make a living?”
Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.
Puff The Magic Dragon song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wik2uc69WbU&feature=related
RUSH THE TRAGIC MAGGOT
(sung to the Peter, Paul and Mary song “Puff The Magic Dragon”)
Rush the tragic maggot lives by the sea
Was born in 1951 in a state called Missouri
Limbaugh’s education went down in a flush
He made it two semesters and his family kept it hush, oh
Rush the tragic maggot had an injury
It was a pilonidal cyst in a place he could not see
Rush the magic maggot petitioned his country
Then they deemed him too unfit for the military
Therefore he did not travel off to the Ho Chi Minh Trail
Limbaugh the rabid chickenhawk was deemed to be too frail
So he became a disc jockey and pursued his fame
Alas he was a failure as his music taste was lame, oh
Rush the tragic maggot found ABC
And began his talk radio stint shilling for the G.O.P.
Rush the tragic maggot tried football on Monday
But when he showed his racist trait they canned his ass hastily
The maggot talks forever and his voice sure annoys
Calls his listeners “ditto heads” while he’s making noise
Rush thinks that he matters and is gen’rally adored
Poor Rush does not realize he’s like a mouse that roars
The mike that he speaks into bigger, than his brain
His brain-dead thoughtless audience is his gravy train
“Operation Chaos” failed in a big way
Despite all Rush’s efforts the Dems won running away, oh
Rush the tragic maggot lives happily
He doctor shops his days away and frequents pharmacies
Rush the tragic maggot loves his Oxy-C
And when he’s feeling a bit down, there’s the blue pill known as “V”