Plans To Build Library Next To Sarah Palin Cause Outrage

We just noticed this wonderful blog post on The DailyMash from last week and we had to reprint it here. Please visit The DailyMash for a slew of other great posts.

“PLANS to build a state-of-the-art library next to Republican catastrophe Sarah Palin are causing outrage across mainstream America.

Campaigners have described the project as insensitive and a deliberate act of provocation by people with brains.

The issue is forming a dividing line in advance of November’s mid-term congressional elections with candidates being forced to declare whether they have ever been to a library or spoken to someone who has books in their home.

Meanwhile President Obama has caused unease within his own Democratic party by endorsing the library and claiming that not everyone who reads books is responsible for calling Mrs Palin a fuckwit nutjob nightmare of a human being.

But Bill McKay, a leading member of the right-wing Teapot movement, said: “Sarah Palin is a hallowed place for Americans who can’t read.

“How is she going to feel knowing that every day there are people going inside a building to find things out for themselves and have thoughts, right in the very shadow of her amazing nipples.”

He added: “Our founding fathers intended for every building in this country to be a church containing one book, written by Jesus, that would be read out in a strange voice by an orange man in a shiny suit who would also tell you who you were allowed to kill.

“Building a library next to Mrs Palin is like Pearl Harbour. Or 9/11.”

And Wayne Hayes, a pig masseur from Coontree, Virginia, said: “I is so angry right now.

“It’s like something is on fire right in the middle of my head. Like I’ve eaten a real hot chilli, but it’s gone up my nose tubes rather than down my ass tubes.”

He added: “Would these library lovers allow me to set up a stall next to the Smithsonian Museum and start selling DVDs of bible cartoons as long as it was in accordance with local regulations?

“Oh they would? I see. So is that why they’re better than me?”

Great post from a great site. Please do yourselves a favor and visit The DailyMash.

In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with tonight’s song parody.

I’m A Believer song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfuBREMXxts

SHE’S A DECEIVER

(sung to the Monkees song “I’m A Believer”)

She tells about as much truth as fairy tails
She considers herself “mavericky”
Russia she claims to see
So say’s Sarah P.
She and Bristol were both pregnant teens

Nose grows on her face, cuz she’s a deceiver
Not a trace, of truth in her lines
Lord above, she’s a deceiver
Couldn’t believe her if I tried

She walked out the door cuz she’s a quittin’ thing
Palin up and caved when things got hot
She never stopped lyin’
Sarah sounds insane
Even though there’s sunshine, she says rain

When I see her face, I see a deceiver
Not a trace of truth in her lines
Lord above, she’s a deceiver
Couldn’t believe her if I tried

Ohhh, McCain didn’t vet she
When he formed his team
Then Palin went and blew his dreams

When I see her face, I see a deceiver
Not a trace of truth in her lines
Lord above, she’s a deceiver
Couldn’t believe her if I tried

When I see her face, I see a deceiver
Not a trace of truth in her lines
She’s a deceiver
She’s a deceiver
She’s a deceiver

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Posted on August 24, 2010, in Sarah Palin, Songs and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. building a library next to Sarah Palin, is like President Obama telling everyone imagine how bad the economy would be without his help. Nobdoy expects Sarah to quote Shakespeare, or believe President Obama knows how to improve the economy without more taxes and czars, and of course more commission reports at great expense.

    • Reagan and George W. each had more czars than Obama. By the way, imagine how bad the economy would be if we still had Bush or God forbid, if McCain had not been wiped out in the election?

      • Yeah, unemployment might have reached 10%. Oh never mind, we’re going back to 10% unemployment, with 13 trillionin debt! Hey, we’re trillionaires thanks to B.O.!

      • We try, but remember what Barney Frank said about arguing with a dining room table? They don’t let facts get in the way of the whining and complaining talking points. If McCain had won we’d be at war with at least Mexico and Iran by now. Him and Sarah fightin’ for rill Amurkins. {{{{shudder}}}}

  2. Really? We don’t think $P could say “To be or not to be. That is the question.”?

    lynnrockets, thanks for this post today–this is my favorite part of the above, after having the plumber over to fix a leak in the hot water line:

    And Wayne Hayes, a pig masseur from Coontree, Virginia, said: “I is so angry right now.

    “It’s like something is on fire right in the middle of my head. Like I’ve eaten a real hot chilli, but it’s gone up my nose tubes rather than down my ass tubes.”

    Sounds like a $P fan to me!

  3. Nobody expects Palin to quote Shakespeare

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