Stupid Tea-Baggers Seek Advice From Colonial Reenactors

This week’s episode of “Can You Believe They’re As Dumb As They Look?” features members of the Tea Party. The Washington Post reports that Tea Party activists are flocking to Virginia’s tourist attraction known as Colonial Williamsburg so as to seek advise from the costumed reenactment actors about how to rebel against 21st century politicians. We are not kidding. This is really happening.

They cheer and hoot when General George Washington surveys the troops behind the original 18th-century courthouse. And they shout out about the tyranny of our current government during scenes depicting the nation’s struggle for freedom from Britain.

“General, when is it appropriate to resort to arms to fight for our liberty?’’ asked a tourist on a recent weekday during “A Conversation with George Washington,’’ a hugely popular dialogue between actor and audience in the shaded backyard of Charlton’s Coffeehouse.

Standing on a simple wooden stage before a crowd of about 100, the man portraying Washington replied: “Only when all peaceful remedies have been exhausted. Or if we are forced to do so in our own self-defense.’’

The tourist, a self-described conservative activist named Ismael Nieves from Elmer, N.J., nodded thoughtfully. Afterward, he said this was his fifth visit to Colonial Williamsburg.

“We live in a very dangerous time,’’ Nieves said. “People are looking for leadership, looking for what to do. They’re looking to Washington, Jefferson, Madison.’’

“I want to get to know our Founding Fathers,’’ he added. “I think we’ve forgotten them. It’s like we’ve almost erased them from history.’’

“They all should come here and listen,’’ said Bob Rohrbacher, a retired plumber from Floral Park, N.Y., who opposes President Obama and was inspired to visit Williamsburg while watching Glenn Beck on Fox News. “They’ve forgotten about America.’’

One Tea-Bagger, wearing a red, white, and blue golf shirt emblazoned with the American flag and the text of the Declaration of Independence — joined the actors in exclaiming, “Well said!’’ every time a character uttered something patriotic.

The executives who oversee Williamsburg said they have noticed an alarming influx of Tea Partiers, and have also noted a rise in the number of guests who ply the costumed actors for advice. Think about the stupidity of these morons for a moment. Rather than taking the time to research and study the actual works of the real forefathers, these Tea-Baggers would rather just pack up the pick-up, travel to a tourist spot and ask soul searching questions to a bunch of costumed actors. Talk about the lazy man’s approach to learning. Heck, why don’t they just purchase the crib notes version of the Federalist Papers?

Is it any wonder that most Americans believe the Tea Party to be merely a misinformed radical fringe group?

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

It’s My Party song link:


(sung to the Lesley Gore song “It’s My Party”)

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you were in our zoo

Nobody knows just what planet we’re from
We have all lost our minds
But we will follow the plan
And misspell all of our signs

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you looked like we do

Playin’ the race card because we’re all white
Swastikas define our style
When Glenn Beck’s eyes get teary
That just makes all of us smile

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you were in our zoo

(musical interlude)

Our Sarah Palin behaves just like a whore
She’s a mean ding-a-ling
She tells us nothing but lies
We believe everything

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you looked like we do

Oh, It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you were in our zoo

Oh, It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to…


Posted on August 5, 2010, in Fox News, Glenn Beck, Songs, Tea Party and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. THAT, is about the dumbest thing I have ever heard.

    Tough times are ahead for me, I have family members who believe and follow this crap and as this all comes to a boil I’ll be more and more tempted to knock the pot off the stove.

    Why won’t these people learn for themselves instead of being molded by the likes of Limbaugh, Beck and Savage. It’s really sad.

  2. Shark Week

    To hear nagging, teabagging scholars like Beck harping on about liberty and freedom, one would think the GOP owns the Constitution.

    However, given the hysterical ranting about godless mosques in NYC, brown people in Arizona, gays in California, and “dropping babies” in South Carolina, it’s becoming increasingly obvious that the Founding Fathers’ greatest concern was defending us from reactionary right-wing twits!

  3. Why do these Tea Baggers get any media coverage when they are this stupid? How do they even get out of the house in the morning?

    “Her extremism is not so much fanatical as it is kooky–or even comical. The worst thing that can be said about her, so far, is that she is not too smart–wily, but dumb. In a nation that, arguably, has become progressively dumber (or, at least, less interested in what used to be considered smart), this isn’t much of a liability.”

    That and she couldn’t finish her job as the governor of a state with the population less than my county.

    I think this country is doomed.

      • Here’s another one for you. The idiots in the media are perpetuating this sham:

        The Saturday event was dubbed Uni-Tea, and was designed to feature mostly minority speakers as a way to send a message that not only isn’t the Tea Party movement racist, but that it seeks diversity amid its ranks.
        Optimistic organizers, who boasted that their website had attracted 2 million hits during the run-up to the big rally, predicted a crowd of 3,000-4,000 people for the Philadelphia event. And they had every reason to be confident. After all, right-wing celebrity Andrew Breitbart, fresh off his Shirley Sherrod star turn, was scheduled to speak at the event, which was held on a gorgeous summer day in downtown Philadelphia on Independence Mall, where throngs of tourists would already be milling around. So it made sense, as Talking Points Memo reported, that organizers had 1,500 bottles of water on ice to hand out for the throngs who descended on the rally to cheer the Tea Party message.

        But how many people actually showed up last Saturday for the national Tea Party rally? One local report put the number at 300. That’s right, 300, or less than one-tenth of the expected turnout. In fact, it’s possible more people showed up in Philadelphia last week to commemorate the opening of the new Apple computer store than showed up at the nationally promoted Tea Party rally featuring Andrew Breitbart.

      • More commentary on that same topic with my favorite comments below:

        “Memo to the media: The Tea Party movement has collapsed.

        And its collapse means it’s time for the press to rethink the way it covers the political equivalent of the Pet Rock, a fad that appears to be in its waning days of popularity.”

        • Ghost of LBJ 43 minutes ago

        It’s also time for the press to stop hanging on every word out of the trash-talking La Palin, as if it meant something.
        Like Reply Reply

        HereinDC 46 minutes ago

        The Teaparty Movement lasted almost as long as it’s head zooloo’s career as Governor of Alaska

  4. So much for the Tea Party’s wide umbrella of membership.

  5. The tea party is one of my dad’s favorite a couple of years ago. Everyone in the family loves tea because of its health benefits. The “It’s Our Tea Patry” song is such a nice song with an easy to memorize tune. Hahaha.

  6. On my blog I have a post called “Hands off Sarah Palin” and it outlines just how furociously someone can be attacked for criticizing her, even for conservatives.

    Now I am a champion of the Constitution, especially the Bill of Rights, but ask one of these numbskulls if they would be willing to take a gun to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and start shooting. They wouldn’t, and for two reasons: they’re chickenshits, and no one wants to trade their lives for an oversized government. I don’t know if they know this, but Rambo is a fictional character.

    Who would we fight against? Seriously, corruption is like a terminal cancer in Washington. You’ve asked the question yourself, Lynn, where were the teabaggers during the Bushes years?

    “A government that governs best governs least.”
    Thomas Jefferson

    • Thanks for the comment. We disagree somewhat on the ideal role of government but at least we can agree that Tea-Baggers are merely the ultra radical wing of the Republican Party.

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