David “Diapers” Vitter Catches The Conspiracy Coach

Senator David Vitter (R) Lousiana has become another gift that keeps on giving. Just a few years ago the philandering “family values” Republican was revealed to be a repeat customer of a prostitution ring. To add insult to injury, his favorite hooker also revealed that the big baby liked to don diapers during his sessions. You would think that a revelation such as that would have caused the G.O.P. leadership to call for his resignation but such was not the case. You see, the Governor of Louisiana was a Democrat and under state law she would have been allowed to appoint Vitter’s replacement. Hence the “do as we say, not as we do” Republicans turned a blind eye to Diaper Dave’s transgressions.

Then, just a few weeks ago it was revealed that one of his staffers had pled guilty to attacking a woman with a knife. Not only did Vitter fail to terminate the staffer’s employment, he also failed to even re-assign the man from his position as legislative assistant for women’s issues.

Now we have the third strike against Diaper Man. CNN reports that Mr. Huggies has recently made statements in which he shows support for the oft discredited “Birther” conspiricists. Before a group of Louisiana voters on Sunday, Vitter said of the issue as to whether President Barack Obama was born in the United States,

I personally don’t have standing to bring litigation in court, but I support conservative legal organizations and others who would bring that to court. I think that is the valid and most possibly effective grounds to do it. I know all the information I’ve been able to get my hands on through the media…But obviously with the mainstream media as a filter, that’s not a whole lot.

Wow, is this guy personally trying to sabotage his own re-election chances? If the voters of Louisiana return this imbecile to Washington, they deserve to be the subjects of all of the uneducated red-neck associations that they are sometimes victimized by.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody.

Walk Like An Egyptian song link: http://www.clipshack.com/Clip.aspx?key=65143F523EF415C0

WALK WITH AN ERECTION

(sung to the Bangles song “Walk Like An Egyptian”)

All the G.O.P.s in bedrooms
They do the sex dance with their hoes
They’re getting their kicks (oh whey oh)
They think that their wives will never know

There sat Larry Craig with a smile
Hoping to score a tete-a-tete
He set for awhile (oh whey oh)
On the airport Men’s Room toilet

Cleans his pipe with a Handy Wipe play
Ay oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh
Walk with an erection

Mark Sanford goes missing for days
In South America for a score
He’s got the moves (oh whey oh)
But he’s a fink and his gal’s a whore

John Ensign met his while at work
Along with her son and her husband
He paid them like kings (oh whey oh)
No talking of his erection

All the guys in the G.O.P. say
Ay oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh
Walk with an erection

(musical interlude)

Newt Gingrich left his wife with no tact
In the cancer ward on her back
Life is hard you know (oh whey oh)
He even took her new Cadillac

Mark Vitter pulled out all the stops
His escorts charged him the very tops
They sing and dance (oh whey oh)
Spent his way right into hawk

Then there’s Mark Foley with his men
He says he won’t do it again
But those heinies know (oh whey oh)
He works with a big erection

All the boys in the G.O.P. say
Ay oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh
Walk with an erection
Walk with an erection


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Posted on July 14, 2010, in David Vitter, Republican, Songs and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Huggies or “papmers” as one of your commenters spelled it? I don’t have much hope for LA and voting. Good work on the song and post.

  2. Ladies’ man

    Vitter, personally, doesn’t have standing to get much of anything done- he spends most of his time lying down, getting his hands on anything but information!

    And why is he bitching about the mainstream media? Even the seediest motels have cable TV!

  3. Hey! Vitter has a primary challenger-former Louisiana Supreme Court Justice Chet Traylor. “Traylor entered the race at the last minute on Friday, disenchanted by the scandal plagued incumbent.”

    http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/07/jindal-neutral-in-louisiana-gop-senate-primary.php?ref=fpb

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