David Vitter Hustles His Diapers To Gulf Coast

As most of you readers know, I like to analyze a current political issue and make a cogent point with a dash of humor or sarcasm. Sometimes this proves to be difficult either because I am not in a particularly humorous mood or the political issue of the day does not lend itself to laughter (i.e. the BP oil spill). On other occasions however, the blog posts simply write themselves because of the involvement of unique political persons or issues of the day. Today’s post is an example of the latter.

Anytime that I can write about Louisiana’s prostitute soliciting, diaper wearing Republican Senator, David Vitter, Hustler Magazine owner Larry Flynt and the BP oil spill all it once, it is a good day for Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off. Today is one of those days.

Hustler Magazine publisher, Larry Flynt, in a letter to Republican Senator David Vitter today, urged the Louisiana lawmaker to personally contribute “diapers and other personal items” in an effort to control the costly effects of the eleven week old British Petroleum oil disaster. Buzzflash.com reports, “Three years ago, Flynt and his team of investigators assisted in exposing Senator Vitter’s extracurricular activities with female prostitutes. Others have reported on the Senator’s penchant for diapers during his transgressions.  Vitter later apologized for his “very serious sin” after documents released by the D.C. Madam, Deborah Jane Palfrey, revealed that he had patronized her high-end, fantasy escort service.”

Here is the letter itself…

Senator David Vitter

516 Hart Senate Building

Washington DC, 20510

Dear Senator Vitter:

Forgive me for intruding on your valuable time.  I know you are a very busy man, especially in regards to the current problems in the Gulf of Mexico. But that’s exactly what I want to talk to you about. I concur that everybody must do their part to solve this serious catastrophe.  And that’s where I think you, in particular, can be of so much help.

As I understand it, you have some expertise regarding diapers.  I have no idea how many diapers you actually have on hand (quite a collection from what I hear) but as you know, diapers are quite absorbent. So, when it comes to blocking the oil that’s gushing into the Gulf, they might be a very effective way of solving that problem. With that in mind, I urge you to donate your extensive diaper collection to BP so they can use them to stop the leak by creating, for want of a better term, a giant “plug.”

It could be a historic moment: An ecological disaster thwarted. And you’ll get the credit for it.  In fact, when people hear the word “diaper” they will automatically think of you. Hell, they already do.

Please don’t piss away this golden opportunity.

Larry Flynt

Lynnrockets would like to wish all of you a happy and safe July 4th weekend. Please remember what I said in my last post and make sure that you find a way to express your love to family and friends.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

The Flintstones television theme song link: http://www.televisiontunes.com/Flintstones.html


(sung to the television theme song “The Flinstones”)

Vitter, meet Dave Vitter
He’s the diaper wearing Senator
From Louisiana
Where he purchases those kinky whores.

On his faithful wife he chose to cheat
Now he’s targeted for big defeat

When you’re David Vitter
Buying hookers on the state dime
It’s big mistake time
It was a vice squad crime

Vitter, David Vitter
Of the “Family Values” G.O.P.
Unlike Johnny Bobbitt
He escaped and kept his prized pee-pee

On his faithful wife he chose to cheat
Now he’s targeted for big defeat

When you’re David Vitter
You’re just wallowing in your slime
Endorsing sex crimes
Exposed during prime time

Exposed during prime time

Posted on July 2, 2010, in David Vitter, Republican, Songs and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 5 Comments.

  1. That letter was priceless. Thanks for sharing it. Why he’s still in office, I’ll never know.

  2. Our Man Flynt

    “An informed citizenry is the only true repository of the public will.”-Thomas Jefferson.

    Who better to keep tabs on a skanky whore like Vitter?

  3. As much as I am repulsed by that diaper pic:


    “Facing reporters for the first time in weeks on Wednesday, Sen. David Vitter (R-LA) denied a key element in the controversy surrounding a former legislative aide who remained on Vitter’s staff after pleading guilty to attacking his girlfriend with a knife in 2008. But records reviewed by TPM show clearly that Vitter’s claim is false.

    Brent Furer pled guilty in 2008 to attacking his girlfriend with a knife, but was nonetheless retained in Vitter’s DC legislative office in the role of legislative assistant for women’s issues until the details of Furer’s crime were publicized in late June. He subsequently resigned. In Louisiana today, Vitter categorically denied that Furer worked on women’s issues in any way. But numerous records and published accounts prove otherwise.

    Several DC-based information services publish detailed listings of staff assignments and contact information for Capitol Hill offices. And multiple directories, both online and in hard copy, name Furer as Vitter’s legislative assistant on women’s issues.


    We’ve reviewed other, similar directories which also list Furer as a women’s issues LA.

    These guidebooks are put together by a handful of companies, which get their information directly from legislative offices.

    Furthermore, in his capacity as Vitter’s Women’s Issues LA, Furer worked with at least one prominent Louisiana advocate — Beth Meeks, executive director of the Louisiana Coalition Against Domestic Violence — on domestic violence legislation, and she was personally informed that Furer was Vitter’s point man on the issue.

    According to ABC News, Meeks “had been in Washington in June – just before news of the incident went public.”

    A call placed this evening to Vitter’s congressional spokesman Joel DiGrado was not returned.

    At his press conference today, Vitter was asked why Furer was assigned to work on women’s issues even after Vitter knew about the assault.

    “Uh, he was not,” Vitter said.

    To clarify, a reporter asked, “He was not assigned to women’s issues?”

    “Correct,” Vitter responded. “And that’s just one of several issues that have been completely misreported. Tonya Newman, Nicole Hebert in my office are assigned to women’s issues. That’s always been the case.” ”

    Too bad there’s documentary proof in the link showing his guilty-pleaing, knife attacking aide’s name and contact info shows Vitter is a liar in addition to visiting hookers and wearing diapers. Is this really the best they can find in LA to represent them?

    • Evidently, someone said no. Interesting—I didn’t realize this Vitter was a Rhodes Scholar…


      “Just before the end of qualifying for the U.S. Senate race late this afternoon in Louisiana, a well-known former state Supreme Court justice jumped in to the Republican primary against incumbent David Vitter.

      It’s been a long time since I covered Louisiana politics, but if memory serves Chet Traylor was first elected to the court in the 1990s with major, major backing from the state’s biggest business group in an effort to steer the court to the right. It was a hugely expensive race by the standards of the day. We’ll be reporting more on this development, but what it suggests to me is that the business community is abandoning Vitter. And unless things have changed a lot in the dozen years since I moved away, Traylor is going to have access to boatloads of campaign cash for this primary.

      The other problem this potentially poses for Vitter is geographic and cultural. Traylor is a good ol’ boy from rural northeast Louisiana. Vitter is a Harvard-educated former Rhodes Scholar from the New Orleans area. That didn’t pose a problem for Vitter when he first won election in 2004, in what was then an open nonpartisan primary. But the law was since changed and it’s a closed Republican primary now, so he’ll be facing Traylor straight up. Throw in Vitter’s dalliances with prostitutes, and Traylor is in a strong position to exploit the old rural-urban (or New Orleans v. not New Orleans) fault lines.”

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