Daily Archives: June 9, 2010

Sarah Palin Says, “Call Me”

"Operator, please connect me with reality. It's urgent!"

Sarah Palin is blowing her own horn once again. The on again, off again part time Fox News guest host and reality television show host feels she should be consulted about the Gulf oil rig disaster. You heard that correctly, the former ex-quitting governor of Alaska believes that the President of the United States should telephone her for advise.

Yesterday, she utilized the sophomoric medium of FaceBook to criticize the Commander in Chief and to offer him her assistance. She appears to be outraged at the fact that Obama has not spoken directly to BP CEO, Tony Hayward. Obama told NBC Tuesday that he has not spoken with Hayward because “when you talk to a guy like a BP CEO, he’s gonna say all the right things to me – I’m not interested in words, I’m interested in actions.” Palin’s FaceBook response?

further proof that it bodes well to have some sort of executive experience before occupying the Oval Office,

Palin then claimed that Obama should call experts that lived through the 1989 Exxon Valdez spill in Alaska, including herself. She said,

We’ve all lived and worked through the Exxon-Valdez spill. They can help you. Give them a call. Or, what the heck, give me a call. Based on my experience working with oil execs as an oil regulator and then as a Governor, you must verify what the oil companies claim – because their perception of circumstances and situations dealing with public resources and public trust is not necessarily shared by those who own America’s public resources and trust.

To a certain degree Palin is correct, “you must verify what the oil companies claim – because their perception of circumstances and situations dealing with public resources and public trust is not necessarily shared by those who own America’s public resources and trust.”, and that is precisely why the President does not feel the need to listen to Hayward’s “perception of circumstances”. Apparently, Palin is also unaware that experts from across the globe (including a few from Alaska) are being consulted by the Obama Administration on a daily basis. It is easy to understand how Palin would be ignorant of this fact in that she only watches Fox News and therefore only receives a limited amount of factual information mixed in with talk of Communists, Fascists and Nazis. Perhaps she does not understand that the President is not interested in the opinion of a half term governor who quit under the pressure of ethics based attacks.

Palin’s overinflated description of her Exxon Valdez experience should also be questioned. After all, fifty days after the Exxon spill occurred, Palin was not exactly involved in plans for remedying that disaster. In fact, she had only earned her bachelor’s degree two years earlier and was busy eloping with her high school sweetheart. Indeed, it was not until 1992 when Palin first held public office in the lowly position of the Wasilla (Alaska) City Council. Not exactly oil industry expertise.

Palin actually never dealt with the oil industry in any capacity until 2003 when she she accepted an appointment to the Alaska Oil and Gas Conservation Commission, which oversees Alaska’s oil and gas fields for safety and efficiency. Although she had little background in the area, she said she wanted to learn more about the oil industry, and was named chair of the commission and ethics supervisor. She quit that position in 2004.

To put things in chronological perspective, the jury verdict in Exxon v. Baker occurred in 1994. This was nine years before Palin even sat on the Oil and Gas Conservation Commission and long before she had any real knowledge about the industry. Thereafter, the Exxon case went through a series of appeals culminating in the US Supreme Court decision in 2008 to drastically reduce the damages award. Palin played no part in the litigation at any time. In short, Sarah Palin has no expertise in the field of oil spill clean-up or the litigation necessary to enforce it.

Barack Obama knows this, so don’t wait too long by the phone Sarah darling. Now run along and play while adults deal with the Gulf oil spill crisis.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have way more fun singing along with today’s very topical song parody.

Today’s song contemplates President Obama actually calling Sarah Palin for advice.

867 – 5309 (Jenny) song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tBHJqtgo8RA

867 – 5309 (SARAH)

(sung to the Tommy Tutone song “867 – 5309 (Jenny)”)

Hey!
Sarah Palin, who can I turn to?
I need an expert that I can talk to
Your oil expertise is the stuff of folklore
I got your name and number on the wall
Sarah, I’ve got your number
I will drop you a line
Sarah, I’ll call your number
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)

Sarah, Sarah you’ll defeat BP
You’re not too bright and you lack a real degree
I should have called you before
But I lost my nerve
Only you can save our nation
Of that, I am sure
Sarah, I’ve got your number
And I can spare the dime
Sarah, I’ll call your number
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)

I got it (I got it), I got it
I got your number on the wall
I got it (I got it), I got it
“For a good time “
“For a good time call”

(solo)

Hey!
Sarah, don’t change your number
I need your feeble mind
Sarah, I’ll call your number
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)

Sarah, Sarah please give us a clue
(867 – 5309)
For the price of a dime I can always turn to you
(867 – 5309)
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)
867 – 5309 (867 – 5309)
5309 (867 – 5309)
5309 (867 – 5309)
5309 (867 – 5309)
(repeat to fade)

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