Sarah Palin, “Start Your Engine !!!”

Sarah Palin will drive the "Arctic Cat" car in the Daytona 500

The announcement last week that Sarah Palin will appear in some unspecified capacity at the Daytona 500 in February should come as no surprise to those that follow the less than mediocre career of the former ex-quitting governor of Alaska. After all, the NASCAR crowd dovetails quite nicely with the audiences she will entertain  at the Bowling Proprietors’ Association of America’s Bowl Expo (i.e. the Bowlers’ Convention) and at the Wine and Liquor Wholesalers of America Convention (i.e. the Boozers’ Ball). In fact, inasmuch as all three of these events take place on different dates, it would not be surprising if the attendees of all three functions are exactly the same people. There is an undeniable symbiosis between drunks, bowlers and racing fans. Sarah Palin should mesh seamlessly.

In other news, CNN reports today that two key G.O.P. speakers have canceled their attendance and speeches at the Tea Party Convention on February 4-6, 2010 in Nashville, TN. Conservative congresswoman Marsha Blackburn of Tennessee and moon-bat crazy congresswoman Michele Bachmann of Minnesota have each backed out of the event at the last minute. Each of their offices has stated that the cancellations come as the result of the fact that the House Committee on Standards has advised them that the sponsor, Tea Party Nation’s for profit tax status could potentially place the elected officials in ethical jeopardy depending upon how the sponsor elects to spend the profits.

The most noteworthy aspect of the last minute cancellations however, is that the two Republicans upstaged keynote speaker Sarah Palin by stealing the thunder of quitting before she does. This puts Palin in a bind. She has attained the status of United States Quitter in Chief by means of her last minute backing out of numerous planned speaking engagements dating back to when she quit her job as Alaska’s governor last July. In order to retain that status, Palin might need to retroactively quit the Tea Party Convention to a date before yesterday. By quitting on the Tea Baggers however, she might irritate the exact same audience that she must appear before at the aforementioned Bowlers’ Convention, Boozer’s Ball and Daytona 500. Decisions. Decisions.

Factoid: The Tea Party Convention will be held at the seemingly inappropriately named Gaylord Opreyland Hotel.

In honor of Palin’s new-found road-racing affection please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s NASCAR inspired song parody.

Roadrunner cartoon theme song link:


(sung to the “Roadrunner” television cartoon theme)

If you’re on the highway and Ms. Palin goes “beep, beep”
Let her pass by cuz she once ran for VP
Ms. Palin, Ms. Palin runs from the truth all day
Even the fact checkers can’t make her change her ways

Ms. Palin, the media’s after you
Ms. Palin, even Glenn Beck says you’re through
Ms. Palin, we see every thing you do
Ms. Palin, no 2-0-1-2  for you

Sarah Palin is really a crazy clown
When will she learn she’ll always be voted down?
Poor Sarah Palin won’t say if she will run
Cuz starring on Fox News has turned out to be such fun

Ms. Palin, the media’s after you
Ms. Palin, even Glenn Beck says you’re through

Poor Sarah Palin seems to bother everyone
She’s runnin’ down the road like a nut with a loaded gun!!!

Posted on January 29, 2010, in Fox News, Glenn Beck, Michele Bachmann, Sarah Palin, Songs, Television, Theme, TV and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 12 Comments.

  1. Marsha Blackburn Voted FOR:
    Omnibus Appropriations, Special Education, Global AIDS Initiative, Job Training, Unemployment Benefits, Labor-HHS-Education Appropriations, Agriculture Appropriations, U.S.-Singapore Trade, U.S.-Chile Trade, Supplemental Spending for Iraq & Afghanistan, Prescription Drug Benefit, Child Nutrition Programs, Surface Transportation, Job Training and Worker Services, Agriculture Appropriations, Foreign Aid, Vocational/Technical Training, Supplemental Appropriations, UN “Reforms.” Patriot Act Reauthorization, CAFTA, Katrina Hurricane-relief Appropriations, Head Start Funding, Line-item Rescission, Oman Trade Agreement, Military Tribunals, Electronic Surveillance, Head Start Funding, COPS Funding, Funding the REAL ID Act (National ID), Foreign Intelligence Surveillance, Thought Crimes “Violent Radicalization and Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act, Peru Free Trade Agreement, Economic Stimulus, Farm Bill (Veto Override), Warrantless Searches, Employee Verification Program, Body Imaging Screening.

    Marsha Blackburn Voted AGAINST:
    Ban on UN Contributions, eliminate Millennium Challenge Account, WTO Withdrawal, UN Dues Decrease, Defunding the NAIS, Iran Military Operations defunding Iraq Troop Withdrawal, congress authorization of Iran Military Operations.

    Marsha Blackburn is my Congressman.
    See her unconstitutional votes at :

    • If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, then it is a duck. Marsha Blacburn is, without doubt, a conservative.

      Blackburn is a vocal opponent of President Obama’s Health Care Reform Legislation, which she characterizes as “a government run, government ensured, government financed, government delivered healthcare system”. She says that the legislation “mandated” “death panels” for the elderly, a position which considers incorrect.

      According to her campaign website, Blackburn has received the following honors:
      * National Journal described Blackburn as a “freshman to watch” and a “top House conservative” in 2003 and 2004.
      * Americans for Tax Reform called Blackburn a “taxpayer hero” in 2003.
      * The Family Research Council gave Blackburn the “true blue” award for the first half of the 108th Congress.
      * National Right to Life praised Blackburn for supporting the Medicare Prescription Drug and Modernization Act.

      Blackburn scored 100% on American Conservative Union’s 2007 Ratings of Congress.

      According to the 2009 annual vote studies by Congressional Quarterly, Blackburn is one of the most partisan Republican members of the House nationally.

      That’s pretty darn conservative quacking.

  2. Nice work on the song. I’d prefer it if she were the coyote in this situation. Maybe she is…we’ll have to wait and see.

  3. Both congresswomen were scheduled to speak for free. Their intent was to raise money for the Tea Party movement. Sarah is (was?) going to be paid about $100,000 for speaking at the Tea Party Convention. Sarah’s intent is to raise money for Sarah.

    I like to believe both congresswomen decided to stick it to Sarah on this one.

    Love the Road Runner song (How do you do it? How do you keep coming up with these funny lyrics? It’s like a bottomless pit.).

    • It might be “last call” at the Tea Party!

      As for the songs, I do not know how they seem to just keep coming. Believe me, I am expecting to hit the wall at some point. I never wrote a lyric in my life before last May. Who knew?

  4. Con Air

    The Profiteer Ball already felt “scammy” to the distrustful, insanely paranoid teagabbers; even without the expensive GOP fundraiser-style dinner. Of course, to the grifter, ethical jeopardy is as foreign as the English language!

    Besides, didn’t Palin mumble something to O’Reilly about donating her speaking fee to the Republican cause (her daughter’s consulting firm)?

  5. $115,000.00 Scarah will NOT be cancelling!
    AND REALLY, if she cancelled her palinbots would adore her it, and if didn’t cancel, they would love her for it….there isn’t one thing she could do or NOT do to alienate the rubes that pay her way.

  6. Ignorant-apolis 250

    To honor Sarah Palin, this year the Indy 500 will end after 250 laps, at which point all the drivers will just up and quit in a huff.

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