Bristol Palin Hits The Tabloids (Again !!!)


Bristol Palin

On its website back in June, MSNBC posted an article which explores recent celebrities and whether they are actual “role models” to younger Americans. In other words, are young people savvy enough to distinguish between true role models and hypocrytes?

MSNBC utilized Bristol Palin as in example:

Recently, Bristol Palin, the 18-year-old daughter of Alaska governor and former vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin, set out on a campaign to urge young people to practice abstinence. “If girls realized the consequences of sex, nobody would be having sex,” she told People Magazine. “Trust me. Nobody.” She became pregnant by former boyfriend Levi Johnston and gave birth to a son in late December.

Strangely however, the MSNBC article omitted any mention of the young Palin’s previous on-air declaration on the Fox network, to wit:

I think abstinence is … I don’t know how to put it … everyone should be abstinent or whatever, but it’s not realistic at all. (emphasis added)

Bristol’s most recent foray into the world of tabloid magazines is this week’s issue of  In Touch. The cover story features both Bristol and her mother, Sarah Palin and is titled, “We’re Glad We Chose Life”. The most curious quote of Bristol’s is,

I’m not going to have sex until I’m married. I can guarantee it.

Jeesh, talk about closing the barn door after the horse has gone!

Inasmuch as Ms. Palin is now a spokesperson (along with Britney Spears the twice divorced unwed mother) for the Candies (shoe company) Foundation and its program to prevent teen pregnancy, we thought a song parody was in order…

I Want Candy song link:


(sung to the Bow Wow Wow song “I Want Candy”)

I know a girl who’ll take some heat
Candies pays this gal to speak
She’s got a mother that is a liar
Sarah sucks like a vampire

She wears Candies
She wears Candies

Bristol’s preachin’ all over town
She should shut-up and sit down
She don’t know squat about abstinence
She’s got a big case of arrogance

She wears Candies
She wears Candies

(musical interlude)

Bristol is a gal that should know better
She should be sporting a scarlet letter
She left school cuz she was failin’
Just like almost every Palin

She wears Candies
She wears Candies
She wears Candies
She wears Candies

Hey, Hey, Hey, Hey

Posted on January 19, 2010, in Bristol Palin, Fox News, Levi Johnston, Sarah Palin, Songs and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 16 Comments.

  1. I guess for us as humans it is easy to pick out each other’s faults. Maybe that is why Jerry Springer and Maury Povich are still popular – or at one time were, I don’t watch their shows. Everyone wants to see the blood flow. But in the big picture Bristol Palin is not the only teenager in this country to have a child by the time she was twenty. My mother had three by the time of twenty-two.

    We live in a day and age when sex is seen as something to share with someone you love, and even love has lost it’s true meaning. Divorce rates are up because people marry for money and looks. Not to mention everyone has visions of a sweet Hollywood ending. I don’t think that young Americans are looking at Bristol Palin and say, “Oh, I want to have sex like her.” Because in reality, Bristol has a safety net and that is mommy and money.

    Speaking of “role models”, how great of a role model was Bill Clinton? He was once the most influential person in America. He lied, cheated, and committed perjury, and walked away scott free.

    How great a role model is John Edwards? He confessed to having an affair with another woman, and now the tabliods are saying that he is having more affiars.

    What about that New York governor who bought prostitutes – I forget his name. Tiger Woods has far more reaching influence and the skeletons in his closet have been revealed to be not skeletons, but ghouls. Teenagers today are getting their infuence from movies like the new American Pie series – sex, beer, and more sex.

    But lets not forget the influence of music, movies, television, magazines, the internet. I could be at this for hours. While Sarah Palin and her family are in the spotlight and are suseptible to praise and scrutiny, and while Bristol Palin can be considered a “role model”, I think that she is probably on the bottom of the totem pole.


    • My problem with your position is that the Palin’s believe in an “abstinence only” position on birth control which would prevent sex education and contraception. You just said, “sex is seen as something to share with someone you love”, so you too must disagree in abstinence only. Abstinence means that there is no sex to share. You also have not addressed Bristol’s hypocritical change of position on whether abstinence is feasible.

      The youth of today need and are entitled to fact based sex education.

    • … and what about that California governor who later became president? You remember him, don’t you: The Hollywood actor of the “sweet endings” who committed adultery with his first wife (she was married at the time) and who impregnated his second wife before getting hitched to her while carrying on with another woman he really wanted to marry? Ah yes, yesteryear when we were less seamy and everyone was purer of heart and married for the right reasons, etc.

  2. I laughed out loud when I saw you’d chosen “I Want Candy” for today’s song. Then again at the vampire line.

    I’m guessing the kids in that household are doomed being in close contact with the psycho-grifter-liar mom that is $P.

  3. Prosperity gospel

    Palin probably has enough skeletons in her closet to sink a ship. She’s become the punch line to a national joke. Even the pundits at Pox struggle to treat her as anything but a notorious novelty.

    Why not reinforce your appeal to the fundamentalist faithful? God knows, it’s easy! Drag your daughter into the spotlight, and remind everybody that, although abortion’s legal… you both have children!

  4. While I think that abstinence is the best option, in todays world I don’t think that people are going to do as the Apostle Paul advised when he said, “to go ahead and get married, for it is better to marry than to burn with lust.”

    To me the teaching of the use of contraceptives in high schools and middle schools says it is okay to go out and have sex. Even condom companies will tell you that it is not a 100% safegaurd against STD’s. Notice that I also said “even love has lost it’s true meaning.” Society has had a way of replacing love with sex. For Paul’s definition of love see 1 Corinthians 13.

    While I don’t like the teaching of birth control and condoms in schools, it’s almost a must to fight the society that we have allowed to rise in this country. A little conflicting, I know, but that is just the way that it is.

    As for Palin’s double-standard – I can about bet that she is not for abstinence. If you have any children, you, know just as well as I do that once you have sex it’s hard to turn it down. Bristol Palin probably has twenty people advising her on what to say, because we wouldn’t want momies image tarnished when she runs for president in 2012.

    • As always, I welcome your reasoned thought. I too, believe that abstinence would be best but I also understand that it is not feasible to be taught as the only type of sex education. You and I may differ sometimes, but as I always like to say, “reasonable people may differ”. Be well.

    • I beg to differ with you about teaching something = permission.
      In my daughter’s high school the pregnancy rate went up 1000%, yes THREE zeroes, the first year they did NOT teach comprehensive sex education.
      People who are sexually interested are going to have sex and it is way smarter to give them the whole story of it instead of letting them pick up their information from sexually illiterate and immature peers.

  5. Speaking of abstinence; something for golfing rocketeers.

  6. Lynn – You really nailed it! And the I Want Candies spoof is awesome 🙂

  7. Speaking of marriage:

    “With the advent of Jesus Christ and the New Testament, marriage fell from grace. The early Christian ideal was a utopian human family, an earthly mirror of Heaven above, unafflicted by the rivalries and allegiances of bloodlines. Jesus was not the marrying kind. “If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters,” Jesus taught, “he cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:26). St. Paul decreed, in his First Letter to the Corinthians, “It is good for a man not to touch a woman,” and said he wished “that all men were even as I myself”—celibate. “If they cannot contain,” Paul conceded, “let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.” This is, as Gilbert notes, “perhaps the most begrudging endorsement of matrimony in human history.”

    For contemporary political purposes, marriage is often depicted as a timeless and unchanging institution; actually, it has been enormously elastic throughout history and across cultures. In nineteenth-century China, it was perfectly acceptable for a young woman to marry a dead man, an arrangement called a “ghost marriage,” which enabled families to consolidate their wealth and power and allowed enterprising young women to pursue their ambitions without the interference of a living husband or children. (Such husbands were very popular. “It was not so easy to find an unmarried dead man to marry,” a ghost bride is quoted as saying in Janice Stockard’s “Daughters of the Canton Delta.”) Among Eskimo in northern Alaska, there was a tradition of creating co-spousal arrangements in which a quartet swapped husbands and wives. Shiites and Babylonian Jews recognized mut‘a: temporary marriages. If a man was granted a “wife for a day,” the couple could be seen in public together and even have sex. “The man and woman had no obligation toward each other once the contract was over,” Stephanie Coontz writes in “Marriage, a History.” “But if the woman bore a child as a result of the relationship, that child was legitimate and was entitled to share in the father’s inheritance.” Couples in modern revolutionary Iran can still petition mullahs for a similar marital day pass.”

  8. I am critical of Bristol Palin being a spokesperson for abstinence for the example she sets for young impressionable girls. Sex is wrong, but my son is the best thing that has happened to me logic spewing from Bristol. Bristol is lucky to have parents who are helping her with her decision, an extended family to help with the duties and plenty of money to finish her education and raise her child.

    Most unwed mothers are not able to get People and InTouch to pay them $100,000 for photos and a fluff article. The women who should be sending the message are poor young girls who don’t have a supportive family and who are waiting tables and going to night school. No matter, how Bristol tried to spin her woes or working and going to night school, her comments don’t make a lot of sense in light of the money she is earning off the publicity and the lack of expenses by still living at home where Mama and Papa are picking up the tab.

    • That, and the hypocritical Candies Foundation “cover” for their pornographic ads….like people don’t see through that “whitewashing.” Or “lipglossing”, or whatever you want to call it.

  9. and most people are not entitled to free health care like Bristol is because her father is part eskimo.

    she has been seen taking Tripp for appointments at the free clinics. Maybe this is the “job” at the doctor’s office that SP claims she has.

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