Sarah Palin, Fox News and The Tea Stooges

The universe is finally in order. The circle has been completed. America will survive because the three elements of conservative right wing craziness are now in symbiosis. First we had Fox News, the “unfair and imbalanced” network which prides itself on promoting non-fact based opinion as news. Next we had Sarah Palin, the confirmed lying, uneducated, language-challenged, manic depressant former ex-quitting governor of Alaska. Then we had the formation of the Tea Baggers, that crazy bunch of racist, hate spewing, paranoid, spelling-challenged, directionless know-nothings. The problem for these three misguided entities however, was that they were all independently orbiting their own inner moron with no real atmosphere to bind them as one. Not anymore, the problem has been solved.

First, Fox News began promoting every Tea Bagger event that it could find or imagine. The network’s hosts such as Glenn Beck began referring to those lunatics as “true patriots”. Fox even went so far as to have its employees attend Tea Bagging events under the false suggestion that they were there only to cover the event. That charade was exposed however, when the Fox employees were filmed by other networks actually taking the stage and inciting the crazy protesters. Hence, Fox News and the Tea Baggers had joined forces.

Next we had Sarah Palin constantly praising Fox News and its hosts while simultaneously bashing every other media outlet that she could name. Luckily for some of them however, Katie Couric revealed that Palin was incapable of naming any brands of print media. Palin’s next step was to begin praising the Tea Baggers and encouraging them with the big lie known as “death panels”. Finally, Sarah Palin has accepted the invitation to be the keynote speaker at the first Tea Party Convention in Nashville this February. It remains to be seen however, if she will actually attend the event because she has a habit of pulling no-shows or dare we say, quitting things (but that is a story for a different post).

Finally, things came full circle this week when it was announced that Sarah Palin has accepted a position to appear as a guest host on Fox News. The stars have aligned. Palin, Beck, Hannity and an assortment of other misguided gasbags like Ann “The Man” Coulter and Michelle “Anchor Baby” Malkin can go on encouraging the Tea Baggers in the name of fair and balanced journalism and Palin and the network can instruct the Tea Baggers to promote Palin for President in 2012. The Tea Baggers will in turn continue to get all of their misinformation from Fox News. All of this of course, is being financed by Rupert Murdoch.

Let’s celebrate by looking at various photos of this insane contingent. After all, isn’t a picture worth a thousand words?

Morans?

Now that's classy.

Hmmm?

Some witty Tea-Party-Crashers!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

It’s My Party song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRbsz1Ha7Zo

IT’S OUR TEA PARTY

(sung to the Lesley Gore song “It’s My Party”)

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you were in our zoo

Nobody knows just what planet we’re from
We have all lost our minds
But we will follow the plan
And misspell all of our signs

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you looked like we do

Playin’ the race card because we’re all white
Swastikas define our style
When Glenn Beck’s eyes get teary
That just makes all of us smile

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you were in our zoo

(musical interlude)

Our Sarah Palin behaves just like a whore
She’s a mean ding-a-ling
She tells us nothing but lies
We believe everything

It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you looked like we do

Oh, It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to
You would cry too if you were in our zoo

Oh, It’s our tea party, and we’ll cry if we want to
Lie if we want to, die if we want to

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Posted on January 13, 2010, in Ann Coulter, Fox News, Glenn Beck, Katie Couric, Michelle Malkin, Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, Songs, Tea Party and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 15 Comments.

  1. Favorite part here:
    “they were all independently orbiting their own inner moron.”

    That is one of your all-time best, lynnrockets.

  2. Very Special Guest Star

    McCain’s advisors had concluded that, were he to be elected, Palin would be relegated to a purely ceremonial role. Management at Pox is in agreement: she’s simply too dimwitted, and frankly, boring, to carry a show on her own.

    In a statement provided by Pox, Palin said she “was thrilled to be joining the management team as a contributor, and would use her new platform to continue her attacks on the mainstream media”.

  3. Sarah’s appearance with Glenn Beck could be a “hoot.” Maybe they’ll talk about why he thinks that HE should be at the top of the ticket. Beck may have been genuinely offended when Sarah called him a “hoot,” because he began to talk about how he’s a “serious” person.

    • Palin and Beck, the “Dyslexic Duo” !!!

      • Dumbass Duo is more like it. I’m sorry, but it had to be said. I think there have been many creative people who were dyslexic who have gone on to do truly productive, constructive things. These two are DEstructive and deserve the ridicule and scorn that they get for their screaming, whining ways.

  4. nswfm:

    You’re right. My last comment was an insult to dyslexics. For that, I apologize.

    • After I wrote that, I thought, “Well, the teabaggers certainly can’t spell. Maybe lynnrockets was right.”

      If you want to hear the teabaggers trying to make sense of their “movement” you should check out today’s “On Point” with Tom Ashbrook on WBUR. They may post a transcript.

  5. Americans don’t care about crap in books

    “It’s pretty made-up, too, I, I think that these reporters who were not in any part of what I was doing there, as a VP candidate, I think that I explained a lot of this in “Going Rogue”, in my book (on sale now), I was there, they were not there… these new revelations of the chaos or the frustration are alarming, quite irrelevant, though, to what is important in this world today.”

    • Yes Sarah, it is irrelevant as to what is going on today, except in that it reminds us that you (with your lack of education and attention) should have absolutely no input on the issues of the day.

      • What a hoot-after the “60 mins” piece, Palin’s on the early flight to NY to announce that, no, she’s not getting a show!
        She will appear on Billo’s show -at a moment’s notice-whenever Murdoch deems it necessary to rehabilitate her reputation.

        And she is such a bore-Beck’s conspiracy minded audience is certainly used to a bit more excitement than Palin’s grating word salad.

  6. Honestly, who else wanted her? She is perfect for “Fake News”, enough said.

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