Sarah Palin, The Sometimes Reluctant Covergirl

There she goes again. Sarah Palin, the former ex-quitting governor of Alaska is once again claiming to be a victim of the mainstream media. This time the target of her accusation is the November 22, 2oo9 edition of Newsweek magazine (see above). On Monday, Palin posted the following on her Facebook page:

“The choice of photo for the cover of this week’s Newsweek is unfortunate. When it comes to Sarah Palin, this ‘news’ magazine has relished focusing on the irrelevant rather than the relevant. The out-of-context Newsweek approach is sexist, and oh-so-expected by now.”

But is it really the photo that Ms. Quittypants is upset about for being “sexist”? After all, she did pose for that photo and never objected publicly to the nearly identical photos published this year in a running magazine. And do “sexist” magazine covers always bother her? If so, then why did she not complain about being referred to as “America’s Hottest Governor” on the cover of the February 2008 edition of Alaska magazine? No, we would venture to guess that Palin is not as upset at the photo which appears on the cover of Newsweek, but rather the caption which accompanies it. It says, “How do you solve a problem like Sarah? She’s bad news for the GOP – and for everybody else, too.” It seems that the clearly “sexist” caption of the Alaska magazine was okay for Sarah because it was flattering to her. The Newsweek photo however, was highly objectionable it seems, because the accompanying caption cast Palin in such an unflattering light.

Poor Sarah, she can’t help it. She was born with a simple mind in her mouth.

And that brings us to today’s parody. In honor of the troops, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the parody.

Simon Says song link:


(sung to the 1910 Fruitgum Company song “Simon Says”)

She likes to play a game,
That is so much fun,
And it’s something even she can do,
The name of the game is “Simple Sarah Says”,
And she would like for you to play it too

Put style gel in your hair,
Simple Sarah says,
Lipstick on your mouth,
Simple Sarah says,
Do it when Palin says,
Simple Sarah says,
And they will vote you right out

Simple Sarah says,
Put glasses on your head,
Don some pants that stretch,
Sarah says,

Simple Sarah says,
Get Bristol out of bed,
That Levi is stiff,
Sarah says,

A beehive on your head,
Simple Sarah says,
The First Dude by your side,
Simple Sarah says,
Hate speech for the left,
Simple Sarah says,
Kind words for the right

(musical interlude)

F-me pumps that are red,
Simple Sarah says,
A gun strapped to your side,
Simple Sarah says,
Diversity left,
Simple Sarah says,
Only whites on the right

Now that we have learned,
To play this game with she,
Sarah Palin has something to do,
Let’s try it once again,
We’ll mimic Sarah P.,
But let’s do it while we’re drinking too

Go kill a polar bear,
Simple Sarah says,
Give your shoes a shine,
Simple Sarah says,
Dress yourself like a whore,
Simple Sarah says,
Ah, you’re looking fine,
Simple Sarah says,
Now, interview if you dare,
Simple Sarah says,
Mingle with the slime,
Simple Sarah says,
Get your ass out the door,
Simple Sarah says,
Make it double time

Posted on November 19, 2009, in Sarah Palin, Songs, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 22 Comments.

  1. Who can forget Rich Lowry’s review of Palin’s VP debate performance?

    “I’m sure I’m not the only male in America who, when Palin dropped her first wink, sat up a little straighter on the couch and said, “Hey, I think she just winked at me.” And her smile. By the end, when she clearly knew she was doing well, it was so sparkling it was almost mesmerizing. It sent little starbursts through the screen and ricocheting around the living rooms of America”.

    Any word yet from those other GOP horndogs, Buchanan and Kristol?

  2. Yes, the “professional victim” nonsense is getting really old.

  3. How did I ever not see this blog?
    My teenage daughter sent me a link!

    Just hangin out, living the good life about 70 miles past the bowels of Wasilla, drinking my morning cup of joe and trying to get one last look at the stars…

    So, yeah, my girl was right, this is a really good blog.
    You got a talent for picking out the music association.
    Thank you!

  4. $P,
    Act like a bimbo, people treat ya like a bimbo, honey!

    Nice work, lynnrockets.

    • Just like her bimbo buddy Carrie Prejean:

      ….in her book Palin writes about, how, during the campaign, she took a call from Pastor Rick Warren when she was showering and that he offered to pray with her.”I said, absolutely! Pray away! I would never turn down prayer even with limited hours in a campaign day, standing in a few inches of water with a shower curtain for a wardrobe. You do what you’ve got to do.”

      She even admits it, just for her other GOP horndogs, Buchanan and Kristol, BigPete…

  5. Blogger/Author/Foreign policy wonk/Real American

    Palin rebuts the sexist media with her breathless policy prescriptions regarding Iran, or is it Iraq?…..whatever!…. “taking steps towards the sanctions that we hear all about but we never take any actions towards those….” (So there!).

  6. So sad to see supposed intelligent articulate people spewing hatred and critism about someone who stands up for what she believes in. I’m most shocked at the large pecentage of women this foul behavior comes from, I can understand the men’s point of view, they have always been afraid of a strong woman who isn’t afraid to speak her mind, but shame on you women out there who go off on Sarah Palin and when asked have no idea why they hate her and are such spiteful cats. Could it may be you’re just a little bit jealous that you aren’t strong enough to a whole woman?

    • Isn’t it more likely that women dislike Palin because of her stance on women’s issues. Palin is against a woman’s right to choose in pregnancy issues. Palin is against legislation that would enforce equal pay for equal work in the workplace. Also too, Palin is a bit of a hypocrite for advising Hillary Clinton to “stop whining” about media coverage last election season when all Palin has done since then is complain about the media coverage of her. By the way, Democratic Party men are not afraid of strong women. Please remember that it was the Democratic Party that first put a woman on the ticket as a Vice Presidential candidate and Hillary Clinton nearly won the Presidential nomination last year. Neither of them could have done so without male Democratic and Independent support.

      • Lynnrockets is right and only scratches the surface of this, Kathy.

        Intelligent, strong women know the difference between Iraq and Iran. $P sets intelligent strong women back with the garbage that falls out of her mouth every time she opens it. Also, Nancy Pelosi is a Democrat and the Speaker of the House of Representatives. If you think women get a hard time, ask Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton about what they have had to endure.

        $P is a world-wide joke.

      • Yes Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton have gotten a bad deal, but have you listened to the garbage that falls out of their mouths? You can disagree with someone’s beliefs without running them into the ground with hateful and vile comments . When I see Nancy Pelosi with her deer in headlights look I want to throw a brick thru the tv, her zany comments and beliefs are over the top, but hey that’s what makes America great, we are able to agree to disagree without retribution. Think about what direction you want America to go, what you want in your children’s and grandchildren’s future, at this time I don’t like to think what my children’s and grandchildren will be like. Pretty scary!

    • Jeannie Sheppard

      I totally agree Kathy!

  7. Kathy, in your first post you said, “So sad to see supposed intelligent articulate people spewing hatred and critism about someone (Palin) who stands up for what she believes in.”

    When I pointed out to you that Hillary Clinton received the same type of treatment you agreed and even added Nancy Pelosi to the list. In your very next sentence however, you did exactly what you criticized others for doing in your first comment by saying, “have you listened to the garbage that falls out of their mouths? ” You then said that when you see Nancy Pelosi, you “want to throw a brick thru the tv, her zany comments and beliefs are over the top”. Aren’t you now one of those very same, “supposed intelligent articulate people spewing hatred and critism about someone who stands up for what she believes in”?

    Face it, you do not like Clinton and Pelosi’s stand on the issues and as a result you have resorted to the same type of insulting behavior that you have accused others of using towards Palin.

    Finally I tend to agree with Pelosi and Clinton’s position on most of what I consider to be the most important issues of our day. I believe our children will prosper and live better lives under those policies than they would have under a McCain/Palin administration. Remember, it was john McCain who first publicly uttered the tasteless joke: “Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly? Because Janet Reno is her father.” Pretty classless to call a teenage girl ugly

    • Kathy, if you have kids and grandkids, think about your hero getting us into a war with another country because she can’t keep her talking points straight. They’ll likely be drafted since our armed forces are already stretched to the max. But maybe you’d like that since you like throwing bricks.

      • Did I say she was my “hero”? No I did not, I haven’t thrown any bricks, I said I would like to and not only at Pelosi and Clinton but at all the other knuckle heads who are out there throwing our country out with the pot! That includes left, right, and anyone in between! No I do not want war, but I also don’t want another country attacking ours and then having more rights than we do.

  8. Kathy, huh? What is this other country that attacked ours and now has more rights than we do? I must be missing something. Were we recently attacked by another country? If so, I do not know which country that was. Are you implying that Al Qaeda is a country rather than a terrorist organization? Does Al Qaeda somehow have more rights than we do? Please explain.

  9. Jeannie Sheppard

    Some people need to get a life. I mean, really, thinking up stupid songs about somebody you don’t even know and putting them, along with your hateful spew, out there. Why spend so much of your time on being so hateful?
    I dislike politics, I don’t trust politicians and question every word they put out there to sell themselves. To me, Palin does not come across to me as your typical politician. Read her books, investigate what she has done for Alasda and come to your own conclusions people. Don’t let ‘haters’ poison your minds. Think for yourselves.

    • The people have spoken. All three polls released last week reveal that the majority do not want Palin as a leader. In fact, a whopping 60% of those polled said that they would not even consider casting a vote for her. It is hard to support someone who just up and quit the last position she was elected to.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: