My Love Song To Sarah Palin

Sarah, will you be my Valentine?

Sarah, will you be my Valentine?

It is time to be honest, folks. We here at Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off have a crush on the ex-quitting-Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin. It is time for us to admit that this blog would not have been born in the first place were it not for Caribou Barbie’s unfaltering pro-life stance. You see, while the idea of this blog had barely been conceived in our mind, we were already contemplating putting that idea out to pasture. But then Sarah Palin started saying and doing more stupid things on a daily basis. We began to wonder just how on earth we could deny mankind all of the wonderful satire and comment that our precious little blog-child would contribute as it grew to adulthood. Hence, our decision was made. We chose life for the blog and the rest is history.

Were it not for Sarah Palin’s butchered television interviews, slutty flight attendant fashion sense, inability to speak a single coherent sentence, vast world travel experience, child birth mysteries, penchant for quitting jobs more frequently than Brett Favre and all around cluelessness, we would never have had the sustaining source material for this blog. For that Sarah, we love you. So, in honor of the troops please enjoy this love song that was penned especially for you.

Love always,


Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song.

You Are The Woman song link:


(sung to the Firefall song “You Are The Woman”)

You are the woman that I’ve always dreamed of
I knew it from the start
You’re like the apple that fell off of the apple cart

It’s all those things you say that make me pee
Because you have no clue
And those interviews you gave on TV
Came right back and bit you, woh, oh

You are the woman that I’ve always dreamed of
You are a work of art
You have no grace and a black rotting thing for a heart

It’s not so much your gross duplicity
Sure not the clothes you wear
It’s all those foreign countries you can see
And you shoot polar bears, who, oh, woh

You are the woman that I’ve always dreamed of
I don’t know where to start
You’re dumber than most of the gals at the mini-mart

It’s hard to tell you just how glad I’m feeling
When you are reviled
You have a way to send my song skills reeling
I just love your style, woh, oh

You are the woman that I’ve always dreamed of
I knew it from the start
You’re in a place that occupies a space in my heart
You’re in a place that occupies a space in my heart

In my heart
Oh, oh in my heart.

Posted on October 7, 2009, in Sarah Palin, Songs and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 7 Comments.

  1. With a song in my heart, I saw our President surrounded by a lot of white coats. I was scared he was being taken away, but then I was happy to see they are dressing up for Haloween. VP Biden dressed up like a general! It’s great to see our leaders cheering up the country. Now that we got a 1 in 10 chance of being unemployed, us hoboes are proud to see more hoboes because of our White House!

  2. Sarah please run in 2012 PLease Please Please Please Please Please….

  3. She looks a mess

    Republicans have only one thing on their minds (no, not money), but even that horn-dog Buchanan seems to have lost his ardent passion for the Quitterator. Yes, losing is like a cold shower!

    The minority neo-cons might still have eyes for Palin, but then, they never stumbled upon an apocalyptic catastrophe they didn’t love.

  4. Thanks for chosing life for the blog.

    And thanks for not denying mankind all of the wonderful satire and comment that your precious little blog-child contributes.

    It is a daily dose of laughs that I am addicted to, and I freely admit it.

  5. BANZAI7 NEWS–Leaderless leading Republicans echoed Sarah Palin on Thursday in attacking President Barack Obama over the weakness of the U.S. dollar.

    Palin, the former Republican vice presidential candidate, ex-governor of Alaska, pulp biography author and economic commentatress launched her dollar tirade on her Facebook page shortly following her CLSA financed Hong Kong shopping trip. She linked dollar weakness to U.S. dependence on foreign oil, large U.S. deficits and designer fashion prices in Hong Kong.

    “We can see the effect of this in the price of designer fashions in Hong Kong, which has hit a record high in response to fears about the weakened dollar,” Palin wrote on Facebook this week. Do you have any idea what it costs to buy lingerie in Mongkok?”

    “That man Obama has really screwed things up economically since George Bush left office.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: