Sarah Palin’s Little Helper

Sarah Palin at the Wasilla Home For Needy Governors

Sarah Palin at the Wasilla Home For Needy Governors

We are still awaiting some sort of confirmation of the “truthiness” of the Globe Magazine‘s recent allegation that Alaska’a former governor, Sarah Palin has suffered a nervous breakdown. The Globe state’s on its website,

CONSERVATIVE darling Sarah Palin is suffering a nervous breakdown as her marriage collapses, her family is rocked by crisis and her political career sinks, insiders fear. This week’s GLOBE bares all the blockbuster details of the former Alaska governor’s secret life. It’s must reading for every American.

All we can say is, “Enquiring minds want to know.”

In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and have more fun singing along.

Mother’s Little Helper song link:


(sung to the Rolling Stones song “Mother’s Little Helper”)

What a drag it is getting old
Palin’s different today
Todd has locked his wife away
Sarah needs something today to calm her down
Thanks to our new Health Care Bill

She’s entitled to a pill
Though she’s gone quite helter skelter, she’s got Palin’s little helper
She takes four or five a day, helps those voices go away

Sarah’s different today
I just overheard her say
That she thinks the tabloid Globe is just a rag
She says that the rumor’s fake, that she’s really not half baked
And goes running for the shelter of her Palin’s little helper
Before they put her away, she gets on her knees to pray

Doctor please, some more of these
Sarah needs more, don’t lock that door
She’s a hag and she’s getting old

Men just aren’t the same today
She wants Todd to go away
It’s his antics that caused her to just retire
Sarah’s never satisfied and now must pacify her mind
Let’s all watch her sweat and swelter as the white coats try to help her
Is the strait-jacket too tight? Can she still put up a fight?

The C4P’s and G.O.P.’s
Try to ignore, that mean press corps
What a drag she is to behold

Life’s just much too hard today
I heard Sarah Palin say
That she thinks that Tina Fey is just a whore
She just wants to stand and pose in her brand new store bought clothes
Now she’s gone quite helter skelter is there anyone can help her?
Or will she stay locked away, straight on through her dying day?

Posted on August 25, 2009, in Sarah Palin, Songs, Talk Radio, tina fey, Todd Palin, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. Funny, I had thought of this song for Sherry’s problem, but the pic and your lyrics for this song are great parody. Well done, sir, well done.

  2. @ “Not Slurping Without Frozen Mudslides”

    Come out, come out wherever you are.

  3. Was a busy day today. Didn’t have anything I could slurp for lunch, either.

  4. Best you can do?

    A couple of Facebook notes and she has the Division Street Duce on the run. Pretty good for a washed up, crazy Quitter, wouldn’t you say?

    • Best I can do? Come on now, you must be kidding. That song sums things up pretty accurately. You must admit that you are humming the tune in your head right this moment. But you are correct, Palin is an inconsequential, unelectable, washed up, crazy Quitter.

      • Oh, by the way, I noticed that your moniker is “Section9”. Isn’t that the section of the Wasilla Home For Ex-Governors in which Palin is being confined?

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