The G.O.P(hilanderers)

Republican Adultery

Let’s take a little break from Sarah Palin and draw some attention to her Republican partners in crime. You know, all those hypocritical “family values” adulterers. The list goes something like this: Ronald Reagan, Newt Gingrich, John McCain, David Vitter, Mark Foley, Larry Craig, Rudolph Giuliani, Ted Haggard, Bob Allen, Glenn Murphy, Jr., Mark Sanford and John Ensign.

Shall we take a little look-see at what some of the members of this rogues gallery have said about philandering.

Newt Gingrich

Former House Speaker Newt Gingrich acknowledged he was having an extramarital affair even as he led the charge against President Clinton over the Monica Lewinsky affair, he acknowledged in an interview with a conservative Christian group.

“The honest answer is yes,” Gingrich, a potential 2008 Republican presidential candidate, said in an interview with Focus on the Family founder James Dobson to be aired Friday, according to a transcript provided to The Associated Press. “There are times that I have fallen short of my own standards. There’s certainly times when I’ve fallen short of God’s standards.”


“I think you can write a psychological profile of me that says I found a way to immerse my insecurities in a cause large enough to justify whatever I wanted it to” – Newt, speaking to Gail Sheehy.

How about this doozy from his former mistress:

“We had oral sex. He prefers that modus operandi because then he can say, ‘I never slept with her.'” – Anne Manning (who was also married at the time.)

David Vitter

After telephone records revealed that he had frequent visits with prostitutes in the DC Madame, Deborah Jeane Palfrey’s employ he said:

“This was a very serious sin in my past for which I am, of course, completely responsible.” “Several years ago, I asked for and received forgiveness from God and my wife in confession and marriage counseling.”

We can understand that his wife may have told him that she forgives him, but how did he receive this message of forgiveness from God? Are we to believe that they are on speaking terms? Even the alleged forgiveness from his wife is questionable in light of a statement from her about adultery which she uttered prior to her knowledge of the Vitter philandering. She was asked by a reporter: If her husband were as unfaithful as Livingston or former President Bill Clinton, would she be as forgiving as Hillary Rodham Clinton? Her response:

“I’m a lot more like Lorena Bobbitt than Hillary.”  “If he does something like that, I’m walking away with one thing, and it’s not alimony, trust me.”

“I think fear is a very good motivating factor in a marriage,” she added. “Don’t put fear down.”

Mark Foley

This is the upstanding Republican that sent the sexual emails to a 16 year old boy that went like this:

Congressman Mark Foley (R-Fla.): “Do I make you a little horny?”
Teen: “A little.”
Foley: “Cool.” –from the transcript of a sexually explicit IM chat Foley had with a 16-year-old male, the revelation of which prompted him to resign (read full transcript; warning: contains explicit language)

Prior to his sexual predilections becoming public, Foley said:

“Anybody even contemplating a sexual offense against a child, understand your life will be ruined.” –Rep. Mark Foley, co-founder of Congressional Missing and Exploited Children’s Caucus


“It’s vile. It’s more sad than anything else, to see someone with such potential throw it all down the drain because of a sexual addiction.” –Mark Foley, on Bill Clinton, in 1998 (Source)

And here is our final Republican culprit for today.

John Ensign

This is the Republican that called upon President Clinton to resign as the consequence of an extramarital affair. He said:

“I came to that conclusion recently, and frankly it’s because of what he put his whole Cabinet through and what he has put the country through,” Ensign said Thursday, becoming the first member of the Nevada delegation to call for Clinton to quit. “He has no credibility left.”

Now that Ensign has admitted to an affair however, he refuses to resign and has confirmed that he will seek re-election in 2010. How much credibility does he have left?

We believe that you will find today’s song parody quite fitting. Enjoy.

Remember to click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Walk Like An Egyptian song link:


(sung to the Bangles song “Walk Like An Egyptian”)

All the G.O.P.s in bedrooms
They do the sex dance with their hoes
They’re getting their kicks (oh whey oh)
They think that their wives will never know

There sat Larry Craig with a smile
Hoping to score a tete-a-tete
He set for awhile (oh whey oh)
On the airport Men’s Room toilet

Cleans his pipe with a Handy Wipe play
Ay oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh
Walk with an erection

Mark Sanford goes missing for days
In South America for a score
He’s got the moves (oh whey oh)
But he’s a fink and his gal’s a whore

John Ensign met his while at work
Along with her son and her husband
He paid them like kings (oh whey oh)
No talking of his erection

All the guys in the G.O.P. say
Ay oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh
Walk with an erection

(musical interlude)

Newt Gingrich left his wife with no tact
In the cancer ward on her back
Life is hard you know (oh whey oh)
He even took her new Cadillac

Mark Vitter pulled out all the stops
His escorts charged him the very tops
They sing and dance (oh whey oh)
Spent his way right into hawk

Then there’s Mark Foley with his men
He says he won’t do it again
But those heinies know (oh whey oh)
He works with a big erection

All the boys in the G.O.P. say
Ay oh whey oh, ay oh whey oh
Walk with an erection
Walk with an erection

Posted on July 19, 2009, in David Vitter, John Ensign, John McCain, Larry Craig, Mark Foley, Mark Sanford, Newt Gingrich, Republican, Rudolph Giuliani, Sarah Palin and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 4 Comments.

  1. God help ’em

    Since Republicans are so repressed, it’s almost reassuring to see them behaving like normal people-even if it’s self centered, lying, cheating, reactionary, hypocritical, crocodile tear shedding, “normal” people.

  2. Republicans are the WORST when it comes to “family values”. LOL. Say, any news on Sarah Palin today…?

  3. There is a new Sarah Palin post up today. I love the photo. Also, tomorrow’s post will either be about Palin and her Twitter account or that guy Ann Coulter and his recent racist remarks. Stay tuned.

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