Palin and Levi – Mullett and Beehive


We are back from vacation and back to reality. Boy oh boy, did a lot of reality happen while we were away. First and foremost (at least for purposes of this blog) was Sarah Palin’s giving up on the State of Alaska by means of quitting the governorship. For selfish reasons we are sorry to see her go, because she was, without doubt, the single greatest source of our entertainment here at Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off. Then again, we are sure that she was the single greatest source of angst for Alaskans. We are hopeful, however that her recently expressed plans to travel the Lower 48 in support of “like minded candidates” will continue to provide hilarity to us here at the blog as well as to allow Alaskans to join in the laughs without also suffering from Palin’s policies. Perhaps every cloud does have a silver lining.

Even Palin’s resignation speech was loaded with her usual confusing logic and word salad. Consider this quote from the speech wherein she attempts to explain why, inasmuch as she has decided not to seek re-election in 2010, she must simply up and quit the governor’s office now, nearly two years prior thereto:

“Many just accept that ‘lame duck’ status and they hit the road. They draw a paycheck and they kind of milk it. I’m not going to put Alaskans through that. I promised efficiencies and effectiveness.”

Well, Sarah how about trying this approach instead of just quitting? How about “walking the walk” as you always say and not acting like those “other” lame duck governors? You have consistently said that you are not like other politicians and that you do things differently. So, how about if you do not broadcast nearly two years in advance that you will not seek re-election in 2010. You see, then the world would not know that you are a lame duck during that period. Secondly, who says that you have to simply, “draw a paycheck and … kind of milk it” during that time? If you are not like those “other” politicians, perhaps you could try something different and actually work diligently during those next two years and not milk it. How does that sound?

We are beginning to think that Levi Johnston is the smartest of the extended Palin family. At least he realized when it was time to up and quit his relationship with his crazy in-laws to be and we understood his reasoning therefore. Remember, as the result of the First Dude’s interference, he was about to be traded in for a new model (car, that is). Just consider the type of grandfather that would induce his daughter to leave the father of their child (and his only grandchild) in return for a new car. This is another example of those sterling Republican “family values.”

This Monday however, Levi Johnston got even by telling CNN that Sarah Palin had considered leaving politics to star in a reality show and/or to simply cash-in on her star status. Note to Sarah Palin: You and your family are simply a television reality show and nothing more. Johnston added that he would not vote for her in the future. Well. Levi, join the crowd.

Please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.

Lido Shuffle song link:


(sung to the Boz Scaggs song “Lido Shuffle”)

Levi missed the vote
That day he caught some flack
Sarah was so damned pissed
But she was just a hack

At a Juneau bar
Drinkin’ from a jar, he heard a pop
She had enough
Good Ol’ Sarah fired a shot

He ran downtown, Sarah had an angry frown, an a-hole
He said, “One more jab oughta get her”
“Since she quit, things are better”
“Now hit the road !”

Levi, Whoa oh, oh, oh
Was Bristol’s honey, now he’s her foe
Levi’s fixin’ to make some dough

Levi, Whoa oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
He took one more stab at poor Sarah
“What’s with all that mascara?”
Now she’ll hit the road

Levi’s a dumb one
Havin’ great big fun rockin’ Palin’s boat
Dishin’ out all those low blows
For her, he will not vote

Palin’s flying ‘neath the tree-line
Levi in her sight line, goin’ for broke
Sayin’ “One good shot oughta do it”
Take this bullet and chew it”
“I’ll just lock and load!”

Levi, Whoa oh, oh, oh
He’s for the money, he’s for the show
He’s Bristol Palin’s former beau

Levi, Whoa oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Palin should just forget it
But she just doesn’t get it
One mean horny toad!

Levi, Whoa oh, oh, oh
He’s for the money, he’s for the show
He’s Bristol Palin’s former beau
Levi, Whoa oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

Posted on July 14, 2009, in Bristol Palin, Levi Johnston, Republican, Sarah Palin, SarahPAC, Songs, Todd Palin and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. The Hillbilly Grifter is gone, but we’ll still have plenty of laughs.

    As soon as Palin steps down, her status will be downgraded to that of an “Anne Coulterish right wing windbag”, and it will be increasingly difficult for the media to justify covering her every move.

    Will Palin accept her new “pundit” status? Heck no! So we should look forward to increasingly bizarre, and desperate, stunts to garner media attention. We’re going to be laughing a lot more than the Republican Party.

  2. I hope you are correct. She is simply the greatest laughing stock that we presently have.

  3. uhm. i dont think so…

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