OMG!!! The President Invited Black People To The White House!!!

The next time that someone tells you that Fox News is “Fair and Balanced” and has no political agenda, tell them about the Fox Nation headline titled, “Obama’s Hip-Hop BBQ Didn’t Create Jobs”. Just below the title there are photos of Charles Barkley, Chris Rock and Jay Z who attended the President’s 50th birthday celebration at the White House. Fox News found no need to mention any of the white celebrities (like Tom Hanks) who also attended the event.

As for the hip-hop? Not so much. The musical portion of the event included performances by the United States Marine Band (one of the most notorious hip-hop groups in the world), R&B singer Ledisi, Herbie Hancock and Stevie Wonder who performed “Signed, Sealed, Delivered I’m Yours.”  I’m sure those cop-hating musical artists were busy all night flashing their guns and throwing f-bombs like hand-grenades!

How dare President Barack Obama!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

“Strange Brew” song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_NholHANoY

STRANGE CREW

(sung to the Cream song “Strange Brew”)

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

Does that Sean Hannity have a new hairdo?
And will Bill O’Reilly go back on “The View”
No clue
And what will Glenn Beck do?

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

There’s a long-faced sullen man that’s named Brit Hume
And a blonde-haired guy named Ann Coulter, too
Pee-you
That’s just to name a few

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

(Misinformation break)

They have a dumb Alaskan known as Sarah P.
And a weekend wimp named Mike Huckabee
Good Lord
Could they be more abhorred?

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

Strange crew, strange crew
Strange crew, strange crew

Strange crew
They’ve got there at Fox News

Hey Sarah, How’s That Abstinence-Only Thingy Working Out For Your Kids? (Updated)

Daryl Cagle, MSNBC.com

Lynnrockets and Co. would like to apologize to you loyal Rocketeers for our failure to post a blog entry yesterday. My “real life” job as an attorney kept me a bit too busy to blog. Today however, we have a little more free time.

So, it is back to work!

Sarah Palin has been denouncing sex education and contraception since she was disastrously thrust upon the American people by John McCain. She has been one of the nation’s foremost advocates of abstinence only education. Of course Sarah Palin did not personally practice abstinence. It would appear that oldest son Track was conceived prior to her wedding on August 29, 1988 inasmuch as he was born on April 20, 1989.

The former ex-quitting half-term Governor of Alaska was also apparently not a very good teacher when it came to instilling the virtues of abstinence on her own children either. First, teen daughter Bristol gave birth out of wedlock. She claims that her “virginity was stolen” (rape?) by her boyfriend one night while she got drunk while on a camping trip. The veracity of that statement is called into question however, inasmuch as Bristol continued to have sex with the same boy for a long time after that. Now we have eldest son Track who also seems to have violated the abstinence only rule. Track was married only last May, yet today we learned that his new wife gave birth to a baby girl  over the weekend.

Geesh Palins, how’s that abstinence-only thingy working out for ya?

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

The Ballad Of John And Yoko song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_t3oaPNJieg

THE BALLAD OF TODD AND SARAH (Version Two)

(Sung to the Beatles song “The Ballad of John and Yoko”)

Standing in the airport at Juneau,
Todd sporting his new campaign-bought pants.
But then SarahPac
Said,“They’ve got to go back”,
“You look just like a homo from France.”

Christ you know it ain’t easy,
You know how hard it can be,
To play second fiddle,
To the Caribou-Barbie.

Finally flew into Indiana
Sarah giving a Pro-Life speech
Her decision rejoiced,
As to her Baby Trig choice.
Because she practiced exactly what she preached.

Christ you know it ain’t easy,
Sarah admitted as much.
She did have a choice, though
She would deny one to us.

Meanwhile in his home-state of Alaska,
The First Dude was beginning to cheat.
He had not one fear
That a massage to his rear,
Would be reported in a tabloid broad-sheet

Christ you know they’re so sleazy,
Just watch them on the TV
The whole Palin family
Lives out a life of deceit

Keeping every penny of per-diem pay,
Lying about clothes to charity,
Daughter that’s unwed,
Boyfriends in her bed.
Her chances of  election
Pretty low – Think!

Relatives all getting arrested.
Family dignity in free-fall.
Constituents claim,
“Sarah is to blame”
Not much of a role-model at all.

Christ you know it ain’t easy
You know how hard it can be.
You know where she’s going?
Into the Party of Tea.

How did we choose Sarah to begin with?
She is just a political hack.
A dumb “hockey mom”,
That can’t think and chew gum.
Why didn’t we elect “Joe Sixpack?”

Christ she makes us uneasy.
In Yiddish we say, “Oy Vey.”
We’d love to replace her
With our good friend, Tina Fey.
We’d love to replace her
With our good friend, Tina Fey.

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 87

Sorry about the late post but these beach days are cutting into Lynnrockets’ productivity!

Just a few newsworthy items (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week but may have escaped your attention. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS:  It is OK if the House Republicans have not passed one single job creation bill since they made the promise to do so back in 2010. Who needs them? Great news this week was that 117,000 jobs were added last month and the numbers for the last 2 months were revised upwards by 56,000 jobs. These job numbers surpassed all predictions. all gains were in the private sector and unemployment is decreasing. Change we can count on.

THIS JUST IN:  The latest example of sleazy Republican tactics to reduce the Democratic vote. Americans For Prosperity (a Koch Bros. owned front) is mailing absentee ballots to Democrats in at least 2 Wisconsin state Senate recall districts with instructions to return the paperwork after the election date. This follows shortly after the GOP Gov. (facing recall) announced closing 10 voter ID issuing DMVs in Democratic districts. Why is the GOP afraid of voters?

BREAKING NEWS:  All Americans should know this. ABC News reported this week that 4 of the 8 Republicans running for President and who claim they know how to bring manufacturing jobs back to the US have their campaign t-shirts manufactured in other countries. The offenders are Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, Herman Cain and Ron Paul.

THIS JUST IN: Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT) has summed things up pretty well. He says, “The rich are getting richer. Their effective tax rate, in recent years, has been reduced to the lowest in modern history. Nurses, teachers and firemen actually pay a higher tax rate than some billionaires. It’s no wonder the American people are angry.”

BREAKING NEWS:  The next time somebody tells you that the Tea Party is gaining momentum, inform them of this. The St Louis Tea Party had scheduled a rally on August 4, 2011 which was expected to fill the Kiener Plaza. Instead, the event received only 3, yes 3, confirmations of attendance and the rally was cancelled. This follows upon the cancellation of the Tea Party’s 2011 convention for lack of reservations and the disastrous showing of only 50 people at last week’s Capitol Hill Tea Party rally.

THIS JUST IN:  This week’s episode of “Tea Party Hypocrites” features Teapublican Wisconsin state senate candidate Kim Simac. She is attempting to unseat incumbent Democrat Jim Holperin. Talking Points Memo reports that it has been revealed that the uber-patriotic themed children’s books authored by Simac are published not in the USA but in China. How is that for patriotism?

BREAKING NEWS:  Sometimes when you hear an idea for the first time, it simply sounds stupid. Then, when you take the time to really ponder it, you understand that it is even more stupid than you originally thought. That is the case with Republican Fox News host Mike Huckabee and his idea that President Obama should fire Timothy Geithner and “Ask Donald Trump to be Treasury secretary.” So, in Huckabee’s opinion, the way to guide the nation out of its economic problems is to have the economy presided over by a man who has declared bankruptcy four times. Here is a better idea: Mike Huckabee should stay out of politics and continue to play the guitar!

SPECIAL NOTE ONE:  It was great to see the Boston Red Sox turn things around yesterday at Fenway Park and wallop the New York Yankees while regaining sole possession of first in the American League East standings. Here’s hoping the trend continues in Game 3 of the series tonight.

SPECIAL NOTE TWO:  The J, Geils Band concert last night at the Pavilion in Boston was terrific. Here is a portion of the review from the Boston Herald:  “Seeing the Boston Whammer Jammers at a sold-out Bank of America Pavilion on a fine summer Saturday night … was great. During that old, brilliant warhorse “Must of Got Lost,” it was damn near transcendent. Last night, Wolf was the consummate showman — still as scrawny, screwy and fun as he always was. And he held court all night long, leading the boys through rock ’n’ roll ser-mons including “Homework” and “Night Time.” Guitarist J. Geils proved why he’s the namesake, with his burn-down-the-house-slowly solo on “One Last Kiss” and the churning Chicago blues of “Detroit Breakdown.” Then there was harmonica maestro Magic Dick —the dude is killer (monster moment: the dirty groove harp on “Sanctuary”). And I didn’t even get to their secret-weapon organist Seth Justman or guest guitarist Duke Levine. The diehards dug it when Geils and Co. reached into their back pages with the bar-band favorites that conquered every honky-tonk and gin joint from here to the Motor City.

There is not yet any video of available from last night’s show. So, in the meantime please enjoy this clip of Peter Wolf joing Elvis Costello and The Imposters on stage at Boston’s Wang Theatre last May:

Saturday With Friends, The Red Sox And The J. Geils Band!

There does not appear to be too much newsworthy news to comment upon this morning. Consequently, Lynnrockets will simply tell you a little bit about the plans for this beautifully sunny day.

First there will be a some of the usual Saturday morning maintenance. Clean the koi pond filters, re-stack that pile of firewood that fell over in last week’s storm and water the potted plants. Next we have to de-scale the Keurig coffee maker which is an hours-long and tedious process involving white vinegar. As that is taking place we will be more than ready for a walk down the hill to Dunkin’ Donuts (think of Krispy Creme for New Englanders, but much bettah) for a couple of refreshing ice coffees.

Speaking of Kurt Schilling, the afternoon of course, will be dominated by the Boston Red Sox/New York Yankees game at venerable Fenway Park. The arch-rivals are tied atop the American League East standings but the Sox will be looking to avenge last night’s 3-2 loss before the home crowd. Needless to say, nothing gets Red Sox Nation more riled-up than when the Yankees are in town. Here we go, Red Sox, here we go!!!

After the baseball game we will be meeting up with some friends visiting from the UK for a few quick libations at one of Boston’s many great watering holes. We will only have a few because the 4 of us will then be off to the waterfront pavilion for the J. Geils Band concert. As many of you longtime Rocketeers know, the J. Geils Band is Lynnrocket’s favorite all time live act. They are a Boston blues and rock band that was notoriously popular in both Beantown (Boston) and the Motor City (Detroit) in the 70s and early 80s. They were known for their raucous and very long stage performances which were dominated by the stage antics of frontman Peter Wolf and lick-stick master Magic Dick. They played most every New Year’s Eve at the old Boston Garden to sell-out crowds. The band changed-up its sound to a more pop-influenced style with its 1981 “Freeze Frame” album. The album included the smash hit “Centerfold” and catapulted the J. Geils Band into the national spotlight. This was fortunate for the band and their wallets, but unfortunate for their long-time fans who still yearned for the rock/blues. The change in style also created a little strife within the band and by 1985 they broke-up.

On May 22, 2006 all six original members had a surprise reunion at bassist Danny Klein’s 60th birthday party at Scullers Jazz Club in Boston. The magic was back and so on February 19, 2009 the band reunited once again to perform the opening concert at the new House of Blues in Boston. We attended that show and were thrilled that the magic was still there. Subsequently they played two more shows in 2009 on April 24 and 25 at Detroit’s Fillmore Theater (formerly State Theater). They also did a second show Boston’s House of Blues on April 28. On July 11, 2009, the J. Geils Band reunited again at the Borgata Hotel/Casino in Atlantic City, New Jersey. On Dec 31, 2009 (yes, New Year’s Eve), they  reunited for a one-night-only live gig at the Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, CT. The band then played a benefit in Boston for Big Brothers/Big Sisters on January 23, 2010, which Peter Wolf called the “last” Geils show. “You never say never,” Wolf noted, “but I can tell you in my heart of hearts that as far as I know — and I’m a pretty good source — there is nothing I can think of that’s planned. So this is basically it right now.”

Not exactly. On August 14, 2010 The J. Geils Band reunited once again to open up for Aerosmith (also a Boston band) at a sold out show at Fenway Park. Lynnrockets also attended that show and felt that the Geils band outperformed the headlining Aerosmith because of their back to roots blue/rock selection of songs. Aerosmith instead, unfortunately relied heavily on newer power ballads and post “Rocks” material from the 1990s and 2000s.

Tonight will be the J. Geils Band’s first show since the Fenway Park gig and we cannot wait!

Interesting J. Geils Band Note: The band has released three live concert albums, one of which is a double album. There is not one repeat song on any of those albums.

Please enjoy these video-clips of the J. Geils Band in action from their early days to the present:

Make sure you watch this one till the very end. it is quite entertaining!

Rick Perry Is Now Praying For Attendees At His Failing Prayer Rally

Dear God please sell some tickets!

There is no question that Republican voters are not fired-up about their League of Unextraordinory Gentlemen (and woman) posing as candidates for the 2012 Presidential election. Can you blame them? Just look at the present contenders. Mitt (Flip-Flop) Romney; Newt Blingrich; Tim (Vanilla) Pawlenty; Rick (Man on Dog) Santorum; Michele (Pray the Gay Away) Bachmann; Jon ( I Love Obama) Huntsman; Ron (Dr. No) Paul; Herman (Convert or Kill Infidels) Cain; Gary (Who?) Johnson; Fred (Who?) Karger; Andy (Who?) Martin; Thaddeus (Who?) McCotter; Roy (Who?) Moore and Buddy (Who?) Roemer. Ouch! This group needs some new blood. But who?

Right now the consensus celebrity of the moment is Texas Governor Rick Perry. He is the soup of the day for conservative Teapublicans because of his outspoken disdain for all things Obama, his southern red-neck locale and his discriminatory “Christianity or Bust” agenda of commingling the affairs of church and state. It just might be the last of those characteristics however, which diminishes his chances of nationwide electoral success.

Perry was riding a big wave of national Republican support and then something funny happened on the way to the GOP nomination. Perry announced last month that he was organizing and sponsoring a seven-hour “Christian prayer gathering” at Houston’s Reliant Stadium this Saturday. The event is called “The Response” but non-Christians have been banned from the 71,500 seat stadium. Consequently, Perry has been facing fierce criticism from those who believe he is going too far with mixing church and state and for discriminating against Texans and Americans with alternative religious beliefs.

Perry is also facing non-interest from those with whom he shares an evangelical background. With only 2 days remaining before the event, Perry has only sold about 8,000 tickets. That is a glaring indication of a disastrous lack of enthusiasm for the potential candidate. Moreover, Perry faces even more negative publicity if, as expected, some of the more controversial speaking pastors sermon long and hard about “the homosexual agenda”. The anti-gay message has been losing steam of late not only with independents, but also with middle of the road Republicans. Additionally, any such homophobic rhetoric could be used against Perry by his opponents.

Perry’s event will be hosted by the American Family Association, a 501(c)3 organization that opposes pornography and abortion and describes homosexuality as the product of “a sinful heart.” The group’s website states:

“We believe the core goal of the homosexual movement is to abolish the traditional, Judeo-Christian view of human sexuality, marriage and family.”

The American Family Association is also classified as a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center. Rick Perry’s association with such a group is remarkable in that it is certain to reflect poorly upon him in the eyes of the national electorate. Then again, perhaps Rick Perry’s “The Response” is just his subtle way of announcing that he has no plans to seek the Republican Presidential nomination after-all.

So, here’s to you Sarah Palin. Our nation’s Tea Party Republicans turn their lonely eyes to you! Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Please remember to click on the song link below before reading the lyrics because it is so much more fun to sing along while the actual song is playing.

Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpPdl0StUVs

HAVE YOURSELF A MERRY PERRY WISH-LIST

 (sung to the Frank Sinatra song “Have Yourself A Very Merry Christmas”)

Have yourself a merry Perry wish-list
Rick loves the far right
He loves you, if you are Christian, rich and white

Have yourself a merry Perry wish-list (merry Perry wish-list)
That’s if you’re not gay (that’s if you’re not gay)
If you are, then simply pray that gay away

Rick Perry loves those olden days
Church-beholden days of yore
All those blacks that were near to us
In the rear of bus for sure

Tea-Baggers will vote for Rick together
Jews are not allowed
Muslims too are barred and for that Rick is proud
So have yourself a merry Perry wish-list now

(Rick Perry loves those olden days
Church-beholden days of yore
All those blacks that were near to us
In the rear of bus for sure)

Souvenirs of us and Rick together
He’s our sacred cow
Rick is our God on earth in the here and now
So have yourself a merry Perry wish-list now

Perry wish-list
Perry wish-list

Fox News Finally Tells Truth: Admits It Softballs Palin

BREAKING NEWS: Hell just froze over!

Fox News just told the truth about something. Yes, the Unfair and Unbalanced network just broke its string of 15 consecutive years of misinforming its audience. It has been reported by CNN that two Fox News Channel anchors said Wednesday they sometimes feel awkward about commenting on former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin because she’s a fellow Fox employee.

“The only problem with talking about Sarah Palin is that she works here, and it’s like a co-worker,” said Greg Gutfeld, co-host of “The Five,” the network’s 5 p.m. ET show. “And if I say something bad and I see her in the hallway, I feel really awkward and wrong, so I just kind of say, ‘good job’.”

Gutfeld’s co-host, Bob Beckel, agreed, saying he’s also held back his criticism of Palin, a Fox News contributor who makes more than $1 million per year from the network. Palin is flirting with a run for president in 2012.

“It has nothing to do with that, it has everything to do with your paycheck. That’s what you feel awkward about,” Beckel said. “I know exactly what you mean. I’ll be honest: I’ve pulled my punches on her.”

What in the wide, wide world of sports is going on here? Does the Fox News brass realize that it faces a massive audience backlash if this proud group of uneducated and misinformed miscreants realizes that it might sometimes be spoon-fed bits of truth?

Yikes! The Murdoch empire is crumbling!

Please remember to click on the song link below before reading the lyrics because it is so much more fun to sing along while the actual song is playing.

Copacabana song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JMHp9a5FwrI

COPACAVILLA

(sung to the Barry Manilow song “Copacabana”)

Her name was Sarah, She was a schoolgirl
With lots of style gel in her hair and a dress cut down to there
She used to play flute, no not the skin type
And yes she was a sportscaster, a job that she could not master
Although she was a pup, with Todd she got knocked-up
They were young and they had each other
Just a mere hiccup

At the Copa, Copacavilla
The hottest spot north of Wasilla
At the Copa, Copacavilla
Those rimless glasses made them look like asses
At the Copa…they fell in love

(Copa Copacavilla)

His name was Toddie, she liked his body
They got married one fine day, He insisted he’s not gay
They said a prayer, then she was mayor
But to add some attitude, she changed his name to the “First Dude”
Sarah then hired some crooks, and then she banned some books
There was trouble with city contracts
So they cooked the books

At the Copa, Copacavilla
The hottest spot north of Wasilla
At the Copa, Copacavilla
Handouts and kickbacks and lots of “Joe Sixpacks”
At the Copa…next it was Guv

(Copa..Copacavilla)
(Copa Copacavilla) (Copacavilla, ahh ahh ahh ahh)
(Ahh ahh ahh ahh Copa Copacavilla)
(Wasilla,  rhymes with vanilla)
(Dumbness and fashion… were always her passion)

Her name is Sarah, she was a Guv’nor
She even tried to be V.P.,  cuz she was so damn “Mavericky”
That was a pipedream for our gal, Sarah
The job was above her pay-grade. More substance in lemonade
Her inlaw getting high. Now she just hates Levi
She lost the race and she lost her mojo
Now she’s lost her mind!

At the Copa (CO), Copacavilla (Copacavilla)
The hottest spot north of Wasilla (Here)
At the Copa (CO), Copacavilla
No education. Unwed procreation
At the Copa…That’s our ex- Guv

(Copa) That’s our ex- Guv
Copacavilla
Copacavilla
(Fade to end)

Gingrich Buys Both Bling And Tweets

Gingrich conducts Jobs Fair in El Salvador

The sinking ship known as the S.S. Gingrich Campaign continues its descent to the abyss.

The thrice-married, thrice-religion-changing former ex-disgraced Speaker of the House and present Republican candidate for President, Newt Gingrich is beginning to look as moonbat-crazy as Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann. First we learned that the self-described frugal conservative had run up about $ 1 million on his credit line at posh jeweler Tiffany & Co. Next, virtually his entire campaign staff up and quit on him in a matter of days. We then learned that the candidate who claims to know exactly how to get the nation out of debt has a campaign that is over $ 1 million in debt. That was followed by the revelation that the man who claims that he will bring manufacturing jobs back to the U.S. actually has his campaign t-shirts manufactured in El Salvador.

Suffice to say, Newt Gingrich has had a troubling 2011. His travails have certainly been more than most unqualified GOP Presidential candidates could withstand. And yet, it continues to get worse. What else could possibly have happened you might ask?

Well, just the other day, Gawker.com published an item “based on a former Newt Gingrich staffer’s claim that Gingrich assembled his 1.3 million Twitter followers—a number that he’s taken to bragging about—in part by buying fake Twitter followers.” The Gawker source claimed that about “80 percent of [Newt's followers] are inactive or are dummy accounts created by various ‘follow agencies’” paid by his campaign. The social networking search firm known as PeekYou has now confirmed that allegation according to Gawker.

PeekYou conducts research on how to measure the quality of Twitter audiences, a project that included looking at politicians’ Twitter followers. And by their count, just 8% of Newt Gingrich’s followers are real people. In other words, only 92% of Gingrich’s Twitter followers are fake!

“We just started running the 2012 candidates’ numbers three weeks ago,” said Josh Mackey, PeekYou’s general manager of business and product development, “and when we saw your story, we went back to pull the Gingrich numbers. The huge majority of his followers are either completely anonymous people who have no other web presence, or they are spambots.”

Gawker.com reports that Mackey said PeekYou actually scrubbed each and every one of Gingrich’s 1.3 million followers, using 23 criteria—including name, location, and inbound and outbound links in their feed—to determine whether they were real people. “We usually find out that real people have real web identities,” he says. For the vast majority of Gingrich’s followers, that wasn’t true. They were either business accounts, private accounts, anonymous accounts that had only a user ID and no other discernible connection to the internet, or spambots. The average Twitter user, Mackey says, has a follower count that consists of anywhere from 35% to 60% real people. At 8%, Gingrich’s is the lowest PeekYou has ever seen. “When was saw it, we actually had our quality assurance people go over the numbers for two days to doublecheck,” he says.

So now, along with expensive bling, Newt Gingrich is also buying Twitter followers. Anyone surprised. Looks like the good ship Gingrich Campaign will soon be nestled right alongside the Titanic. Ahh Newt, we hardly knew ye.

Please remember to click on the song link below before reading the lyrics because it is so much more fun to sing along while the actual song is playing.

You’re A Mean One Mr. Grinch song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzXKWKaxt3c

YOU’RE A HAS-BEEN, NEWT GINGRICH

(sung to the Dr. Seuss song “The Grinch That Stole Christmas”)

You’re a has-been, Newt Gingrich
You’re lacking in appeal
Your were ousted as The Speaker
No one wants to hear you squeal
Newt Gingrich

You’re a unicycle
Without even one wheel

You’ve had three wives, Newt Gingrich
A mistress in the hole
Philandering’s your day job
You’re a slimy ugly troll
Newt Gingich

These woman that like you, must
Be on work release or parole

You’re a vile one, Newt Gingrich
Your words reek with rancid bile
Your criticism of Bill Clinton
As you’re cheating all the while
Newt Gingrich

There couldn’t be a bigger hypocrite
Within a Midwest country mile

You’re a foul one, Newt Gingrich
Your first divorce smelled of skunk
Your wife, Jackie fighting cancer
You told her she was junk
Newt Gingrich

The nicest words to describe you,
Are, as follows, and I quote, Pink. Wank, Punk

You’re a coward, Newt Gingrich
Avoided your army spot
Deferment-seeking chicken-hawk
That likes to talk real tough
Newt Gingrich

Your soul is an appalling dump heap overflowing
With the most disgraceful assortment of Republican
Sound-bytes imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots

You’re the racist, Newt Gingrich
It’s not Judge Sotomayor
You play the race card as a white guy
That’s so laughable I’m sure
Newt Gingrich

You’re a stinking pile of vomit
Sitting in the sun
With feces on top

Donald Trump, The Bankrupt Billionaire For President, Again?

Sorry about the absence of blog entries for the past few days. Lynnrockets and company were enjoying a wonderful long weekend on Cape Cod, Massachusetts with some dear friends from the UK and the laptop was inadvertently left back in Boston. But enough of that, now it is time to get back to work.

It is deja vous all over again in the world of Republican politics. Donald Trump has announced that he may jump back into the GOP Presidential race. Trump, of course was already in the mix of Presidential candidates until he was forced into quitting as the result of the ridicule he endured as a consequence of his “Barack Obama Has No Birth Certificate” campaign. Remember how angry and ridiculous he looked at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner In May as television cameras focused on his scowling face while President Barack Obama publicly belittled him?

Well some time has now passed and Trump has been out of the spotlight busy licking his wounds. Problem is, Donald trump hates being out of the spotlight. So, on the eve of the passage of a debt ceiling bill, the bankrupt billionaire pulled his head out of the sand and announced another possible run. First he lied by saying , “I’m still at the top of the polls” for the best choice of Republican Presidential nominee. Then, in an interview on CNBC, he said, “If the economy continues to be bad, and I believe it will, and the Republicans choose the wrong candidate, [I’ll give my candidacy renewed serious consideration].”

Let’s hope he runs for the simple fact that he will add some more humor to the race. After all, Donald Trump is a perfect fit for the Republican nomination because he shares so many traits with other Republican politicians. The thrice married “family values” Trump is a serial philanderer like Rudy Giuliani and Newt Gingrich. He is a reality television series host like Sarah Palin. The former enthusiastic proponent of universal health care has now flip-flopped on the issue just like Mitt “Personal Mandates are Good” Romney. He is employed by Fox News along with Sarah Palin  (and recently, Bolton and Santorum). Trump is also a “Birther” like Michele Bachmann, who doubts that President Barack Obama was born in the United States. When you consider that The Donald has also filed for bankruptcy on at least 4 occasions, it begs the question, “who would be more suited to lead our nation out of the worst economic downturn since the Great Depression?”

So, buy a box of popcorn and a horn of cotton candy, take your seat and enjoy this election cycle’s version of the Republican Bros. Flying Presidential Circus.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s topical song parody. Enjoy!

Big Bad John song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWKGhwwVgKY

BIG DUMB DON

(sung to the Johnny Cash song “Big Bad John”)

Dumb Don
Dumb Don

Every Tuesday at nine, you will see him arrive
He stands 6 foot 5, weighs 289
A reality show host who’s not very hip
He fires contestants if they should give him any lip, he’s Dumb Don

Dumb Don
Dumb Don
Big Dumb Don
Dumb Don

He wears a toupee atop his big dome
Donald Trump acts like a clown, still he seeks the throne
A dim-witted putz, he’s not a bright guy
Claims he robbed Quadafi but that’s a lie – Dumb Don
The nit-wit hails from the borough called Queens
And he has managed to file too many bankruptcies
Filed so many you can’t count them on one hand
Yet Trump still thinks he’ll lead the country to the promised land – Dumb Don

Dumb Don
Dumb Don
Big Dumb Don
Dumb Don

Head made of clay and he loses every dime
He owned a football team that lost all the time
Built a casino, it did not last
Then the taxpayers bailed out his sorry ass – Dumb Don
Through the dust and the smoke as his empire fell
Crawled this maggot of a man that will soon rot in hell
Called a willing banker and he begged for a loan
But when asked for collateral he said “it’s all been blown” – Dumb Don

Dumb Don
Dumb Don
Big Dumb Don
Dumb Don

And now Donald Trump thinks that the Lord up above
Will stroke his election dreams with a velvet glove
Yet little does he know that he can’t be saved
Donald’s campaign is headed to the grave – Dumb Don
Don Trump won’t earn his seat in DC Town
Let’s all watch his big smile turn to a frown
And as The Donald learns life is unkind
All of us just knew it was the end of the line, for Dumb Don

Dumb Don
Dumb Don
Big Dumb Don
Dumb Don

Let’s hope that we are done with this worthless twit
Even Tea-Baggers know Trump’s an idiot
If only the future could be planned
We would love to say, “You’re Fired!” to this shell of a man – Dumb Don

Dumb Don
Dumb Don
Big Dumb Don
Dumb Don