Palin follows “Gang Rape” and “Cajones” with “Impotent” and “Limp”

Sarah just loves the "F-Word"

Nevermind the fact that the recently released Vanity Fair article titled, “Sarah Palin: the Sound and the Fury” reveals overheard arguments between Sarah and husband Todd in which “F-Bombs” are dropped like so many Alaskan snow-flakes, we only need read Palin’s books and tweets and listen to her interviews to witness her sex-obsessed toilet-mouth in action.

The aforemention non-flattering Vanity Fair article includes the following segment detailing  Sarah and Todd’s marital chemistry:

One person who has been a frequent houseguest of the Palins’ says that the couple began many mornings with screaming fights, a fusillade of curses: “ ‘Fuck you,’ ‘Fuck this,’ ‘You lazy piece of shit.’ ‘You’re fuckin’ lucky to have me,’ Sarah would always say.” (This person never saw Todd and Sarah sleep in the same bed, and recalls that Todd would often joke, “I don’t know how she ever gets pregnant.”)

If you are unwilling to believe the words of that particular unnamed source, simply take a look at some of Palin’s own published or recorded words to get a taste of her often sexually charged language. For Instance, Palin has long held that her children are unfairly exploited by the media and that their personal lives should be off bounds. However, in her ghost-written memoir titled “Going Rogue” she unabashedly wrote,

In that first year, I was alerted to threats against Willow by students at her Juneau school, one particularly disturbing. Someone posted a note on an Internet site threatening to gang-rape her at school. I never felt safe for her after that. Later, the same thing happened to Bristol.

There is no denying the fact that threats of gang rape are serious matters, especially when allegedly made against two young girls. The problem with the Palin allegation however, is that both school officials and local law enforcement have stated that these threats were never reported to them by the Palins. Was that because Palin did not believe them to be credible threats or was it simply to protect her daughters’ privacy? In either case then, why would Palin then publicize these events in a widely read book? Is it because “gang rape” is a spicy term sure to attract attention?

Another example of Palin’s off-color, sexually tinged language occurred just last month. While appearing as a guest on “Fox News Sunday”and discussing the Obama administration’s partial judicial victory in the litigation over Arizona’s controversial immigration law, Palin said  that Arizona’s female Republican governor has “the cojones that our President does not”. Palin claimed, in essence, that Jan Brewer has bigger “balls” than Barack Obama. How is that for showing respect for the office of the President of the United States of America.

Sarah Palin is obsessed with references to genitalia. Just last Thursday evening, while appearing on Sean Hannity’s program on the Fox network, Palin was discussing the unflattering Vanity Fair article. She was upset that the author had quoted many anonymous sources so she said,

Those who are impotent and limp and gutless and they go on their anonymous – sources that are anonymous – and impotent, limp and gutless reporters take anonymous sources and cite them as being factual references. It just slays me because it’s so absolutely clear what the state of yellow journalism is today that they would take these anonymous sources as fact.

Really Sarah, “impotent” and “limp”? Is that the best you could do with your limited vocabulary? Perhaps Washington Post media critic Howie Kurtz put it best when he said, “I agree [with] Palin on overuse of unnamed sources, but calling reporters ‘impotent’ and ‘limp’? Did she have to go there?”

The answer to Kurtz’s question? Of course she did. With Palin, it is always either the “F-Bomb” or “gang rape” or “cajones” and now “impotent” and “limp”. She is a classless woman that must always resort to potty talk because she lacks the education and intellectualism to carry on a more socially acceptable adult conversation. Any respectable host would be embarrassed to invite her to a gathering at his/her home for fear that Palin’s language would devolve into gutter talk.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

You’re Going To Lose That Girl song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7ABWbnuQhk

YOU’RE JUST A LOSER GIRL

(sung to the Beatles song “You’re Going To Lose That Girl”)

You’re just a loser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loo -ooser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)

Sarah Palin is so far right
She’s a Tea Party pawn (She’s a Tea Party pawn)
All of her fans are lily-white
They are deaf, dumb and blind (They are deaf, dumb and blind)
You’re just a loser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loo -ooser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)

Palin has gone off the deep end
She’s got her blinders on (She’s got her blinders on)
And she just built a twelve foot fence
So Joe cannot look on (He’s not the only one)
You’re just a loser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loo -ooser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loo –ooser… (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)

She’ll make a point of tellin’ only lies to you (That’s what she’ll do) Yeah
She’s such a cheater what else can she do?

{Guitar} (You’re just a loser, girl)
{Guitar} (You’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loo -ooser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loo –ooser… (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)

She’ll make a point of tellin’ only lies to you (That’s what she’ll do) Yeah
Let’s go defeat her, what else can we do?

I think her hair’s pulled much too tight
She’s clearly lost her mind (She’s clearly lost her mind)
She really is just Glenn Beck-Lite
They are two of a kind (They are two of a kind)
You’re just a loser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loser, girl (Yes, yes, you’re just a loser, girl)
You’re just a loo –ooser, girl. You’re just a loo –ooser

Sunday Morning Coffee (or Tea) – 51

Just a few newsworthy events (and comments thereon) that have been making their way through the political universe this past week. Please ponder and maybe chuckle a bit before enjoying a wonderful day!

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “People Who Get It” features Susan Retik of Boston, Massachusetts. This Jewish woman who lost her husband in the 9/11 attacks is planning to speak at a mosque in Boston today. She will be trying to recruit members of the mosque to join her battle against poverty and illiteracy in Afghanistan. Sarah Palin and Rev. Terry Jones could learn a lot from Ms. Retik.

THIS JUST IN: Time Magazine reports that a former National Republican Congressional Committee treasurer has pleaded guilty to embezzling more than $840,000 from several political committees, including more than $670,000 from the congressional committee. Christopher J. Ward of Bethesda, Md., who has been under investigation for some time, entered the guilty plea Friday in federal court in Washington. Anyone surprised?

BREAKING NEWS: Sarah Palin this week endorsed gay-baiting, anti-sex Republican Christine O’Donnell for a Delaware US Senate seat. Salon.com reports that O’Donnell is a Tea Party candidate that “keeps insinuating that Mike Castle (her G.O.P. opponent) is gay. She is also opposed to masturbation.” oh Sarah, you really know how to pick-em!

THIS JUST IN: In a shocking turn of events, Moonbat-Crazy, Tea-Bagging Nevada Senate candidate Sharron Angle may need to hire one of those liberal elitist trial lawyers to defend her. In a lawsuit filed last Friday, Las Vegas-based Righthaven LLC alleges Angle has violated copyright laws by posting two newspapers stories in their entirety on her campaign website. The proposed remedy: Righthaven is asking a federal district judge for statutory damages for willful infringement of the two articles, attorneys’ fees and control of Angle’s domain name, sharronangle.com.

BREAKING NEWS: This week’s episode of “Ain’t The Bay State Great?” features the registered voters of Massachusetts. Despite US Senator Scott Brown’s January surprise, Massachusetts Republicans are still bleeding voters. The latest voter data show Republican registration has slipped to a recent low — just 11.34 percent of those registered to vote identify themselves as members of the Grand Old Party.

THIS JUST IN: California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger took a shot at former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin on Friday, writing that he was “looking everywhere but can’t see Russia from here” as his plane flew over Alaska. Don’t you just love it when Republicans ridicule each other?

BREAKING NEWS: Not to be outdone, Sarah Palin the half-term ex-quitting Governor of Alaska shot back at Arnold Schwarzenegger. “Arnold should have landed,” Palin tweeted. “I could have explained our multi-billion dollar state surplus & US energy security efforts. What’s he been up to?” Then again, Schwarzenegger should as k Palin why she tries to spend the majority of her time away from Alaska. Maybe the weather? Like we just said, don’t you just love it when Republicans ridicule each other?

THIS JUST IN: This week’s episode of “Fox Feasting On Fear” features, who else but Fox News. On Wednesday, Imam Feisal Abdul Rauf of the proposed NYC Muslim cultural center went on CNN’s Larry King Live and warned of the dangers of perceived anti-Islam sentiment in the United States, especially as it relates to his Park51 project. Specifically, Rauf said that outspoken opposition to his project creates “danger from the radicals in the Muslim world to our national security.” In essence, he echoed the words of both Gen. David Petraeus and President Obama. How did Fox News react? Fox Nation broadcast as its top story that “Imam Threatens U.S., Says If Mosque Moves, Terror Will ‘Explode.’” Pam Geller — whose anti-Muslim bigotry leads her to view the world as a Magic Eye book filled with hidden Islamic crescents –announced in a headline that “Ground Zero Supremacist Imam Rauf Threatens America.” Jim Hoft claimed in a post about Rauf’s “threat” that the “radical” Rauf “warned that if America did not get down on its knees and allow the victory mosque to be built on the bones of dead Americans that …’They will attack.’” Hoft instructed Rauf to ”take your victory mosque and shove it.” Face it, Fox no longer broadcasts news, but only broadcasts a spin on events that fits its conservative narrative. Fox News is nothing more than a cheerleading squad for Republicans and Tea-Baggers.

FINALLY: This post would not be complete without mentioning The Beck/Palin Traveling Prayer and Gibberish Revival which found itself in Alaska last night. You know, the event where Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck charged people up to $ 225.00 to remember 9/11. Nothing of importance was said by either Sarah Palin or Glenn Beck but there were a couple of head-scratchers thrown out there. First, Sarah Palin completely fabricated a story about the Statue of Liberty (the place where she claims she first met Beck). She said the statue was given to us by France as “a gift to warn us against socialism.” Not even close Sarah. The inscription on the statue itself declares the statue to be a gift from the people of the Republic of France that honors “the Alliance of the two Nations in achieving the Independence of the United States of America and attests their abiding friendship.” Better yet however, was when Glenn Beck proclaimed that the Palins actually dissuaded him (and many others, we’re sure) from ever visiting Alaska. Beck said that he once planned to vacation in Alaska, “We didn’t come to Alaska because your husband (Todd Palin) scared us to death.” The Palins sure have a strange way of promoting Alaskan tourism. It was refreshing to learn that at least one heckler shouted truthfully that Beck and Palin were hypocrites. At least someone in that audience was not brain-washed. By the way, does anybody know the total money-count Beck and Palin clawed from the wallets of their audience for the privilege of remembering the solemn events of September 11, 2001? President Obama and Vice President Biden did not charge a penny at their services.

Go Packers!!!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

I Write The Songs song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-fev20voMc

I WRITE THE SONGS

(sung to the Barry Manilow song “I Write The Songs”)

I sling the jive whenever,
I sit down and scribble a song
I put the words and Republicans together
I love music,
And I love these songs

I write the songs that I hope you folks sing
I write the songs to dethrone G.O.P. kings
I write the songs that expose all their lies
I write the songs, I write the songs

I’m from a state that’s deep blue,
And we make a damned good lobster roll
No, there aren’t many right wing guys
There’s some but then, all of them are very old

I write the songs that attack the right wing
I write the songs that I hope linger and sting
I write the songs that prompt Glenn Beck to cry
I write the songs, I write the songs

Oh, I’ll take a hostile stance
When Limbaugh begins to rave and rant
And I’ll lead you to a poll, he can’t disprove
Palin has no heart,
So, I will tear her life apart
Hannity, Coulter too,
Also, too, O’Reilly
None of them can hide from me !!!

I write the songs about Mark Sanford’s flings
I write the songs about Larry Craig’s stings
I write the songs about Mark Foley’s guys
I write the songs, I write the songs

I write the songs about Joe Wilson’s slings
I write the songs of Vitter’s diapery things
I write the songs about all of those guys
I write the songs, I write the songs

I love music, so I write these songs

Tea-Bagger Sharron Angle Morphs Into “Chicken Lady”

Remember back in August when moon-bat crazy Tea-Bagger Sharron Angle defeated Sue Lowden in the Nevada Republican US Senate primary. Lowden was known as “The Chicken Lady” because she insisted that Americans don’t need health-care reform when they can simply raise chickens and barter them in exchange for medical care. Angle of course, is the radical nut-job that wants to ban all abortions even in the case of rape, wants to privatize the Veterans’ Administration, wants to abolish the Social Security and Medicare programs, wants to outlaw the sale and consumption of alcohol and remove the fluoride from our water supply. Oh and by the way, Angle says that if candidates like her are not elected this fall, the masses should resort to their “2nd Amendment remedies” (she advocates assassinations of public officials?). Wow, was that ever a race between imbeciles!

Well, a funny thing happened on the way to the general election against Democratic Party incumbent, Harry Reid. First, the Tea-publican Angle began calling press conferences in which she refused to answer questions from the press. Next, she decided that she would not make herself available to the mainstream press in any way. And most recently we learned that she campaigned against a high school football team’s black uniforms because “black is the color of the devil”.

She also appeared on Fox and Friends (which nobody would consider mainstream media) and challenged Harry Reid to a debate. Indeed, just last week she appeared as a guest on Nevada’s  “Face to Face” and agreed to debate Harry Reid in an hour-long live broadcast from Reno on October 21st. Angle said, “What I would like to see is Harry Reid come into this studio with you and I and have a true debate.”

What Angle said and what she meant are two entirely different things however. We learned on Thursday that Angle has, shall we say “chickened out” of the debate. “Face to Face” host Joe Ralston said,  “that within hours of Reid accepting the debate challenge, Angle’s campaign called to say, well, its backing out now.” Ralston went on to say,

“I thought I had seen it all in this campaign. I guess not. I had agreement from Angle’s deputy campaign manager for this debate, but soon after we announced Reid had agreed to the date and place, her campaign spokesman called to say there was no agreement. I’m not making this up, folks. A campaign spokesman overrules a deputy campaign manager? I really don’t understand the hierarchy in that campaign.”

Fact is, absolutely everything about the Sharron Angle campaign is incomprehensible. By backing out of the debate that she requested, Angle has morphed into Nevada’s new “Chicken Lady”. She is a crazy woman of the highest degree and if she wins this election perhaps the sane people of Nevada should resort to their “2nd Amendment remedies”.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Psycho Killer song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Smge23DCE8

PSYCHO CHICKEN

(sung to the Talking Heads song “Psycho Killer”)

Sharron Angle is a Tea-Bagging hag
What her mouth needs is a silencing gag
She tells her fans to “open fire”
If her race comes down to the wire

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away

She starts a conversation she can’t even finish it
She’s talkin’ a lot but she’s not sayin’ anything
If she has her way, Medicare’s repealed
Sharron said once, that God hates gay men

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!!!

Angle is just so yellah
She spins like a propeller
She’s as cold as vichyssoise
Nevadans hope she just goes…away
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

She is vain and she is blind
She is the Tea Party kind

Psycho Chicken
Won’t debate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Rather,
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Psycho Chicken
Spreading hate
Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck
Better
Run, run, run, run, run, run, run away
Oh, oh, oh, oh, Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi!!!

Sean Hannity: A Faux News Calamity

Sean Hannity has lost a lot of clout over at Faux News during the last year or so. Glenn “Crying Eyes” Beck has vaulted to the top of the propaganda network’s pecking order by means of his publicly televised long-running nervous breakdown. Hey, they may be gruesome, but nobody can look away from a train wreck, right? Let’s take a little gander:

Bill “Felafel Thing” O’Reilly has also jumped ahead of Hannity by means of his new approach. O’Reilly is now the only Fox News toady that will actually ask a tough question or challenge Sarah Palin’s ridiculously ignorant assertions. Here is an example:

So where does this leave former Fox golden boy, Sean Hannity? The brainless idiot schtick belongs to Beck. The “go against the Fox News grain” schtick now belongs to O’Reilly. Consequently, Hannity is left with the unenviable role of attempting to appear serious and interested while providing a platform for recently publicly embarrassed conservatives to rehabilitate their damaged images without having to face a tough question.

One recent example of this occurred last week when his guest was Arizona Governor Jan “Beheadings” Brewer. She had just been publicly humiliated during a televised debate during which not only did she refuse to admit that there were no beheadings in her state, but when challenged on the topic, she declared that she would not participate in any future debates. In short, Brewer announced that she was taking her ball and going home. She then suddenly appeared on Hannity’s show a few days later where he failed to mention the debate at all and instead, introduced Brewer as, “the woman who refuses to back down.” Wait a second, didn’t she just back down from previously scheduled debates? Hannity then allowed Brewer to assert without challenge that “the Federal Government is against Arizona and they’re going against everybody because they just don’t want to do their jobs”. Every other credible news source reported on Brewer’s debate performance and her stance on the mythical beheadings, yet Hannity never touched those subjects.

Sean Hannity does share at least one trait with all other Fox News hosts. He can be counted on to do very little research and then to misquote, misconstrue and take all sorts of President Obama’s words out of context. Case in point:  Newshounds reports that on Wednesday night’s show, Hannity said, “Now the president did have a rare moment of honesty during his speech and I hope voters around the country are watching this.” He played a clip of Obama saying, “Taxes are scheduled to go up substantially next year. For everybody.” Hannity then sneered, “I know the anointed one will make sure that that happens.”

Of course the quote was taken entirely out of context. Hannity did not tell his viewers that Obama was talking about how Republicans scheduled that tax increase and how he wants to avoid it for the middle class. Here is the excerpt from that portion of Obama’s speech in its entirety:

I’ll give you one final example of the differences between us and the Republicans, and that’s on the issue of tax cuts. Under the tax plan passed by the last administration, taxes are scheduled to go up substantially next year — for everybody. By the way, this was by design. When they passed these tax cuts in 2001 and 2003, they didn’t want everybody to know what it would do to our deficit, so they pretended like they were going to end, even though now they say they don’t. Now, I believe we ought to make the tax cuts for the middle class permanent. (Applause.) For the middle class, permanent. These families are the ones who saw their wages and incomes flat-line over the last decade -– you deserve a break.

This is just another example of why those people that seek their news from Sean Hannity and all the other Fox News hosts are so dreadfully uninformed. In the realm of news coverage, Sean Hannity is a disastrous calamity.

On a personal front. Sean Hannity is also an uneducated lying chicken-hawk. You might remember that the NYU dropout (that’s correct, Hannity has no college degree ala Limbaugh and Beck) insisted that “water-boarding” was not torture and that he could withstand the ordeal. Indeed, Hannity offered to undergo the procedure for charity. However, when MSNBC‘s Keith Olbermann agreed to donate $ 1,000.00 for every second that Hannity could endure the process, Sean put his tail between his legs, ran away and buried his very large head in the sand. He was too chicken to accept the challenge and in so doing, he also cost a worthy charity some much needed money. You are a girlie-man, Sean Hannity.

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

Saturday In The Park song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5bhBSb92LY

HANNITY IN THE DARK

(sung to the Chicago song “Saturday In The Park”)

Hannity in the dark
You’d think that he would open his eyes
Hannity in the dark
It’s rhetoric that the reich wing buys
Keeps us barfing, keeps us laughing
The man is a lame-brain
G.O.P. talking points
Ixnay on the truthiness
Do you dig it? (no, we don’t)
And he’s been at it such a long time
Sean Hannity

Hannity in the dark
You’d think that he would open his eyes
Hannity in the dark
It’s rhetoric that the reich wing buys
His tough talking, while he’s smiling
Scared of waterboarding
Chicken-hawk with gall
Olbermann exposed the fool
Can you dig it? (yes, we can)
And Alan Colmes was such a nice guy
Yesterday

Slow thinking dropout without a college degree
A bought man just can shill for the G.O.P.
Fox News execs know they’re his boss
Know they’re his boss (oh, yeah, yeah)

In a daze, in the dark
Every day’s a day full of lies
In a haze, off the mark
He’s just like Limbaugh in disguise
Embellishing and misleading
An abomination
Like the Berlin Wall
An idiot, pitching a fit
Can you dig it? (no, we can’t)
And he’s been at it such a long time
Hannity

Doltish Duo of Palin And Beck Exploit 9/11

What better way to honor the memory of the victims of the September 11th terrorist attacks on our nation than to reap personal financial gain by charging everyday Americans $ 225.00 to listen to you speak? That is precisely what Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck plan to do on September 11, 2010. The Doltish Duo will appear jointly in Alaska on that date.

Sarah Palin announced the event via her preferred and sophomoric means of communication known as Facebook. On September 7th she posted as follows:

Glenn’s coming to the Last Frontier! I hope my fellow Alaskans (and anyone visiting from Outside) will join me this Saturday, September 11, 2010, at Anchorage’s Dena’ina Center at 8:00 p.m. Glenn Beck will be there – you won’t want to miss it. Tickets are available at Ticketmaster.com.

We can count on Glenn to make the night interesting and inspiring, and I can think of no better way to commemorate 9/11 than to gather with patriots who will “never forget.” Hope to see you there!

Honestly Sarah, didn’t you really mean to say, ” I can think of no better way to commemorate 9/11 than to gather with patriots who will ‘never forget their wallets’”? Why is it that whenever Sarah Palin is involved in an event, there is either an admission fee, a book signing fee or a photograph fee? It is particularly tasteless for Palin and Beck to host a fee-based event on this solemn occasion.

In stark contrast to the Palin/Beck disgrace, President Obama will participate in a wreath-laying ceremony at the Pentagon and Vice President Biden will join in services at Ground Zero in New York City. There will be no admission fee for either of those events.

Here are a few actual comments which appear on Palin’s Facebook page announcing the event (with Lynnrockets’ comments thereon appearing in italics).

Janice Barnes Sarah, I would love to see Glenn Beck. I watch him every day. I have a transportation problem and I only get $100 a month. I am 61 and living in assisted living. All of this is threatened by Obama. (No, actually Ms. Barnes, your $ 100.00 a month is threatened by the Palin/Beck $ 225.00 admission fee).

Habib Usmani sweet heart miss you a lot. (Um, just wondering Mr. Usmani, but are you the secret lover of either Palin or Beck? If so, then who?)

Ann Crawford Wish I could be there. My two favoirite news people… (“news people“?)

Mosby’s Confederate Border Rangers If any of you are not on my facebook friendship list, please add me? (Mosby’s Confederate Border Rangers? Please give us a break!)

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

American Girl song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=akiBVlrRvEQ

UN-AMERICAN GIRL

(sung to the Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers song “American Girl”)

Well, she’s an un-American girl
Breakin’ promises
Not much of a thinkin’ girl bear
We wish Palin would live life – somewhere else

After all it is a great big world
And she could take her gun too
And she could go on a –  lyin’ spree
Start one little foreign based new G.O.P.

Oh yeah, far right
She’s a sleazy lady
Makes us laugh all night
She’s an un-American girl

The truth may just unfold alright
Joe Mac stands alone on his balcony
Yeah, even though her fence is high, Sarah Palin can’t run
And she can’t stop Joe’s free speech

Palin’s one ornery mama bear
Yet she has many enemies
God, we’re so thankful she’ll never get those votes
Election’s far out of reach

Not wrapped, too tight
She’s a sleazy lady
Makes us laugh all night (makes us laugh all night)
She’s an un-American girl

Lynnrockets Is A Romney-esque Flip-Flopper

Lynnrockets: Coming or Going?

After careful reconsideration lasting all of about 10 minutes, Lynnrockets has decided to jump right back into the blogosphere after a 6 hour retirement. Like Brett Favre, life after blogging did not suit me. Like Mitt Romney, please feel free to label me a flip-flopper.

Your many thoughtful comments made me realize that not only do I have a lot of fun penning these posts, but I would miss all of you that I now consider friends. Thanks for pulling me back.

I guess that it is only fair to poke fun at myself this time. So, please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s self-effacing song parody.

Should I Stay Or Should I Go song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZBPu7jJbJU

WILL YOU STAY OR WILL YOU GO

(sung to The Clash song “Should I Stay Or Should I Go”)

Rockets you’ve got to let us know
Will you stay or will you go?
Will you stay and pen some rhymes
Or leave for social drinking times?
So you’ve got to let us know
Will you stay or will you go?

We won’t say “please, please, please”
And we won’t beg while on our knees
One day you’re gone and then you’re back
An indecisive singing hack
Well come on and let us know
Will you stay or will you go?

Will you stay or will you go now?
Will you stay or will you go now?
Will you blow just like a bubble?
Or will you stay and stir up trouble?
So come on and let us know

Your indecision’s bugging me
If you don’t love us then just flee
Back to your island in the sea
Which overlooks ol’ Boston City
Come on and let us know
Will you carry-on your show?

Will you stay or will you go now?
Will you stay or will you go now?
Are you having rocket trouble?
Then get back here on the double!
If you want your blog to grow
You cannot be a big no-show!

Will you stay or will you go now?
Are you having rocket trouble?
Then get back here on the double!
So you’ve got to let us know
Will you stay or will you go?

(Diaper)Dave Vitter Dissed By Bobby Jindal(Bells)

Louisiana's Gov. Bobby Jindal(Bells) and Sen. (Diaper)Dave Vitter

The most crooked political party in one of the crookedest states in the Union has a genuine case of infighting. CNN reports that Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal(Bells) has finally answered a questioned asked of him for months: Will he endorse embattled Republican Sen. (Diaper)David Vitter’s reelection bid? Jindal’s answer is “no”. He told local television station WDSU that, “Voters can make up their own minds”.

Jindal added he doesn’t like to get involved in federal races, though the station reports he has backed federal-office seekers in the past.

Jindal’s rejection of Vitter exacerbates the problems that have arisen from reports in 2007 that the married Senator was involved with a Washington, DC prostitute (while he was wearing diapers) and revelations earlier this year that a high-ranking staffer who’s position was to oversee “women’s issues” was permitted to stay on the job after being convicted of domestic abuse charges involving the stabbing of a female.

It is always most enjoyable to watch Republicans eat their own.

Please remember to click on the song links below to familiarize yourselves with both of the tunes and to have more fun singing along with today’s duo of song parodies.

Getting Better song link:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jk0dBZ1meio

DAVID VITTER

(sung to the Beatles song “Getting Better”)

It’s David Vitter all the time
That David Vitter is a fool (only half a brain)
His hookers tell him that he’s cool (as they drain the vein)
Just like Scottie Brown (oh,oh)
Trousers are down (oh, oh)
Vitter just stutters and drools (Oooh)

You’ve got to admit that David Vitter (Vitter)
Wears baby diapers all the time (it can’t get no worse)
You’ve got to admit that David Vitter (Vitter)
That David Vitter
Just loves vice crimes

A useless and angry young man
Dave’s now universally panned
Let’s give him the bird, that obnoxious turd
Let’s give it to him with both hands

You’ve got to admit that David Vitter (Vitter)
Wears baby diapers all the time (it can’t get no worse)
You’ve got to admit that David Vitter (Vitter)
That David Vitter
Just loves vice crimes

We know David Vitter crawls in slime

Wears baby diapers all the time
Vitter, Vitter, Vitter
He leads a secret life of crime
Vitter, Vitter, Vitter

Dave loves to be cruel to his woman
He cheats and he spends all his time with the hookers he loves
Vitter is mean and he’s oh so obscene
Just like all those Republican men (ooh)

Just admit it David Vitter
You’re an offender all the time (you can’t get no worse)
Please just admit it David Vitter, your baby sitter
She dropped a dime

We know David Vitter crawls in slime

Wears baby diapers all the time
Vitter, Vitter, Vitter
He leads a secret life of crime
Vitter, Vitter, Vitter

We know David Vitter crawls in slime

Jingle Bells song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O2MFducncsg

JINDAL-BELLS

(sung to the song of “Jingle Bells”)

Dashing through Naw’Leans
Sporting his brand new short pants
Taking in the scenes
While practicing a dance

Down in Baton Rouge
He’s a resident
But he can’t wait to move up north
And be the President

Oh, Jindal-Bells, Jindal-Bells
Jindal  I say, “Nay”
Oh how dull it is to be the Guv’nor of LA

Hey, Jindal-Bells, Jindal-Bells
Can Bobby come to play?
He looks like a nine year old out playing in the hay

(musical interlude)

A month or two ago
While climbing in a tree
Bobby was surprised
By the G.O.P.

They said they needed him
And not that Sarah P.
To replenish all their hopes and dreams
As their next nominee

Oh, Jindal-Bells, Jindal-Bells
Jindal  I say, “Nay”
Oh how dull it is to be the Guv’nor of LA

Hey, Jindal-Bells, Jindal-Bells
Can Bobby come to play?
He looks like a nine year old out playing in the hay

(musical interlude)

Bobby then replied (bobby then replied)
What about Romney? (what about romney)
He’s too on our side (he’s too on our side)
And much smarter than me (ha, ha, ha)

Then there’s Newt Gingrich (then there’s newt Gingrich)
And good old Huckabee (and good old Huckabee)
Let’s not forget that other bitch
The Texan, Kay Bailey

Oh, Jindal-Bells, Jindal-Bells
Jindal  I say, “Nay”
Oh how dull it is to be the Guv’nor of LA

Hey, Jindal-Bells, Jindal-Bells
Can Bobby come to play?
He looks like a nine year old out play-ing in the hay!

A Short Personal Post From Lynnrockets (Updated)

Nothing to do with politics tonight. Also, thankfully for me, no story of personal tragedy either (God, I’ve had enough of those already this year). I just thought that inasmuch as so many folks are beginning to put the pieces together and figure out who I am that maybe I would just post a little something about my night tonight. Sort of a diary thing.

As many of you now know, I lost both of my parents (and best friends) in the last few months. I then moved back into the house that I grew up in which is located on an island off the coast of Boston. All in all, not a bad place to be. It is somewhat odd to live in the smallest town in Massachusetts with many folks that I grew up with and have never left. Odd mind you, but now I think I am the luckiest person in the world ( or at least in the northeast).

Everyone comes from somewhere and this is my “where”. Tonight I rambled down to my local pub. This is not a rare occurrence by the way, as I’ve been known to do the same from time to time (OK, most of the time). I had so much fun drinking and playing around (and more drinking, did I ever mention I am Irish?) with so many of my old time school chums. It felt like something out of an old time Currier & Ives illustration. I’m very lucky to live in New England. Quite picturesque and all.

In any event, I was kidding around with some old high school chums of mine ( bookies, killers and thieves) and realized that we all share this same little world of ours. Here I am concerning myself with politics and the big picture while guys just like me are more concerned with the trials and tribulations of everyday life. I then realized that …

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L–cqAI3IUI&p=8E6CCF93DFB9690C&playnext=1&index=37

It’s not so bad being a beach boy.

UPDATE:

This may be it. I think that I am burned out. I will post a few more articles that have been pre-written, but I don’t know if I’ll be back for awhile (if ever). Until then, here is something that always makes me cry. I hope you folks remember me as fondly…

Glenn Beck Lies To His Naive Followers (Again)

Beck: The Kool Aid Nazi

The formerly drug-addled and uneducated Glenn Beck has a bad habit of lying and misconstruing facts on his radio and television programs. The Fox host is known to fabricate stories and resort to misleading hyperbole on a nightly basis. His exaggerations and falsities are all designed to lend support to his fiction-based conspiracy theories and wildly inaccurate character assassinations. Once Beck starts lying, he simply cannot stop.

For example, Glenn Beck lied that Van Jones was arrested and went to prison for taking part in the Rodney King riots. It never happened. Beck lied when he said that no President had been sworn into office without the Bible.  John Quincy Adams used a law book. Franklin Pierce wasn’t even sworn in.  Teddy Roosevelt used no Bible. He lied when he said that the Director of White House Science and Technology Policy, ” has proposed forcing abortions and putting sterilants in the drinking water to control population.” Glenn Beck lied when he said that when consumers used the government’s cash for clunker site they had to agree that their computers would become government property. And he lied when he said that the US was the ONLY country that had a natural birthright provision. The list goes on and on and on and on and….

But as the saying goes, a picture is worth a thousand words, so let’s go to the moving picture show, shall we?

Want more?

Not convinced yet?

Just last week Beck told a real whopper to his sycophantic worshippers in Washington D.C. at his “Restoring Honor Rally”. In fact, his lie involved George Washington, the President that allegedly could not tell a lie. Beck proclaimed,

“I went to the National Archives, and I held the first inaugural address written in his own hand by George Washington.”

Problem is, Beck lied yet again. Archives spokeswoman Susan Cooper insists that Beck didn’t lay a finger on any precious documents, much less George Washington’s inaugural address. That would be a major violation of policy. “Those kinds of treasures are only handled by specially trained archival staff,” she explains. Cooper acknowledges that someone at the archives did show the document to Beck, but that was the extent of it.

You see, like the true compulsive liar that he is, Glenn Beck cannot speak the truth even on matters of little to no consequence. He could have made his point (whatever it was) merely by saying that he read Washington’s inaugural address. But he could not tell the truth. Beck was compelled by his own lack of veracity to embellish the story to the effect that he actually held the original document in his bare hands.

Glenn Beck is an untrustworthy liar of the highest order. We can only wait in excited anticipation for this September 11th when Beck and sister serial liar, Sarah Palin appear together at an event in Alaska. Who knows what doozies these two crackpots can come up with if they put their confused heads together?

Please click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with the song parody.

Last Train To Clarksville song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ScXXaBu1Ing

LAST TRAIN TO NUTSVILLE

(sung to the Monkees song “Last Train To Clarksville”)

Take the last train to Nutsville
Beck will meet you at the station
You can be there by four-thirty
Cuz Fox made your reservation
The Beck Show, oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no!

Glenn lost his mind without warning
And it won’t be back again
Glenn Beck’s facing stormy weather
And it’s causing quite a strain
So, he must go, oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no
He might have a lobotomy on his dome.
Take the last train to Nutsville
Glenn Beck is their famous patient
If he’s not crying he’ll blow some kisses
But don’t attempt conversation
Oh… oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no!

Take the last train to Nutsville
That’s where Glenn Beck now calls home
We can’t hear him making noisy
Conversation all alone
He’s feelin’ low. Oh, no, no, no!
Oh, no, no, no!
And I don’t think that Glenn’s ever coming home.

Take the last train to Nutsville
Take the last train to Nutsville
(repeat and fade)

Lighthearted Labor Day Laughs (at the Palins’ Expense, of Course)

Sarah Palin says, "Talk to the hand!"

Sarah Palin’s favorite holiday is Labor Day. After all, her husband Todd has been a card-carrying labor union member in the oil industry (although neither he nor she ever bring that subject up). Also too, Sarah has been in labor either four, five or six times depending on who you believe. That being said, we can be sure that the grills were be serving up plenty of moose meat at Chez Palin today. Will neighbor/author Joe McGinniss be invited to share in the warm-hearted Palin frivolity which includes such things as expletive laden shouting tirades between Sarah and Todd, the “four letter word maximum” Scrabble tournament, or the three legged mukluk races? Let’s hope the entire Palin clan has a little light-hearted fun as the summer ends and Sarah begins to prepare for her her big September 11th surprise with Glenn Beck.

In the meantime, Lynnrockets would like to take all you faithful Rocketeers on a little stroll down memory lane. Here is wishing you all a wonderful day!

Please remember to click on the song link below to familiarize yourselves with the tune and to have more fun singing along with today’s song parody.

The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6U219P_zs7w

THE WRECK OF THE SARAH L. PALIN

(sung to the Gordon Lightfoot song “The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald ”)

The legend lives on from the North Slope on down
To the town they call Sandpoint, Idaho
The Heath’s one would say, had a daughter that day
Why they kept her, I must say, “I don’t know”

They loaded up the truck and they tested their luck
When they moved to Wasilla, Alaska
Sarah enrolled in school and was nobody’s fool
On the court they called her “Barracuda”.

In 1982 she left for Honolulu
Off to Hawaii Pacific College
She did not last long there nor at anywhere
In her quest for some meaningful knowledge.

She finally did see a journalism degree
After stints at 5 or 6 safety schools
Sometime in between she was a pageant queen
Then she worked in TV for KTUU.

She met up with her fate sometime in ’88
When her TV career was a failin’
And everyone knew, as her parents did too
She would soon be the Bride of Todd Palin.

Long before she did wed, she conceived in his bed
That was the end of her abstinency
While laid out on her back, she gave birth to Lil’ Track
The result of an unwed pregnancy.

She was now in a lurch cuz of her right wing church
But she carried on without a care
She had a beehive hairdo, but had nothing to do
That all changed when she became the Mayor.

She appointed some crooks then she banned some good books
No one lasted if they weren’t on her team
Wasilla’s deficit grew, kids fired-up on homebrew
Not to mention the methamphetamine.

She became the next Guv and to show the state love
She proposed to unite remote shore banks
But once in a bind she politely declined
To the bridge she said,”Thanks but no thanks”.

John McCain now you see had to choose a VP
His campaign was certainly failin’
He wanted a she that was trés “mavericky”
So he chose Alaska’s Sarah Palin.

But poor press reviews of her live interviews
With Couric and Gibson oft replayed
Showed she could not spar with the nightly news stars
Let alone outperform Tina Fey

The election was lost and poor Sarah was tossed
From her seat on “The Straight Talk Express”
She went home and did pose in her new store-bought clothes
But  Alaskans were not now impressed

She’s no longer a saint due to ethics complaints
She has nobody left now to wink at
Her appointees ignored and her actions abhorred
She’s reduced to shilling for “Arctic Cat”

She gave Levi some lip about visiting Tripp
And Todd’s sister is facing some jailin’
But paternity laws might be the final straw
For the wreck known as Sarah L. Palin