Monthly Archives: August 2009
Being (Barney) Frank With Tea-Baggers
Anti-Health Care Reform Protesters and their clever signs
I do not mean to brag, but sometimes I am very proud that I live in Massachusetts, the “Cradle of Liberty.” In this most blue of all blue states, political discourse is welcomed. Starting with those “Founding Fathers” that conservative Republicans love to invoke so frequently, through those hate filled days of court imposed desegregated school busing in the 1970′s, and right up to today’s Anti-Health Care Reform protests at congressional town hall meetings, Bay Staters have encouraged vigorous public debate. Perhaps it is a by-product of the over 120 colleges and universities in the Boston metropolitan area, that the population is educated and enlightened enough to realize that well informed decision making will trump ill-informed rabble rousing most every time. That might also explain why the Commonwealth has never in its 389 year history, had a Republican Governor serve two full terms.
But I digress. The purpose of this particular post is to illustrate how to best conduct a town hall meeting when alleged protesters that are bought, paid for and bussed to the meeting by Republican interest groups funded by Republican lobbying firms attempt to disrupt the meetings rather than to engage in thoughtful discussion. To that end, please welcome Congressman Barney Frank.
On August 18, 2009, Frank held a town hall meeting in Dartmouth, MA. There were plenty of Health Care Reform supporters and vocal opponents. Unlike many of his brethren throughout the country however, Frank did not cancel his meeting, phone-in his meeting, or resort to accepting only written questions. On the contrary, he explained precisely why he supported health care reform, allowed opponents to question him and provided thorough fact based answers to those questions.
Whenever an opponent resorted to the Republican Interest Group tactic of simply disrupting the meeting by means of screaming and shouting out talking points, Frank confronted them directly. He shamed them, in no uncertain terms, by telling them that such behavior was counter-productive to their cause and would not be tolerated. When attacked by shouted myths of health care reform, such as mandated coverage for illegal immigrants, death panels and budget implosion, he calmly countered with facts taken verbatim from the draft of the most recent incarnation of the proposed bill. In short, he held his ground.
Most impressive however, was the way in which he handled those opponents that displayed personally derogatory illustrations of the President and/or made Nazi comparisons. He fired back at them without pulling any punches. To one woman that displayed a caricature of President Obama in which he resembled Hitler, Frank berated her by asking what planet she came from and then told her that trying to hold a conversation with her was akin to having a conversation with his living room table. She was silenced by her own absurdity.
Barney Frank has manufactured the template for all members of Congress to utilize at town hall meetings. Have a comprehensive knowledge of your material; express it thoroughly yet succinctly; allow opponents to question you civilly and respond in kind; and when confronted by ill informed obtrusive or insulting behavior, exercise your 2nd Amendment rights and fire back unapologetically. To you Mr. Frank, I say, “Bravo.”
Please do yourself a favor and watch this entire clip. They should make multiple copies and hand them out to every member of Congress.
OK, now for the funny stuff. Today’s song parody is my version of the Tea-Baggers’ National Anthem. As Sarah Palin would say, in honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along. (As an aside, please note that the music video link is in honor of recently deceased filmmaker, John Hughes and is a clip from his wonderful film, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off)
Twist And Shout song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUrOMB-iBLk&feature=related
BITCH AND SHOUT
(sung to The Beatles version of the song “Twist And Shout”)
Well, make it up, ladies, now (make it up, ladies)
Bitch and shout (bitch and shout)
C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, ladies, now (come on ladies)
Know what you’re talkin’ about (talking about)
Start spreadin’ some doubt, honey (spreadin’ some doubt)
Wear your pillowcase hood (pointy hood)
You got the bullshit flowin’ now (bullshit flowin’)
And you’re sportin’ some wood (didn’t know you could)
Just make it up, baby, now (make it up, baby)
Bitch and shout (bitch and shout)
C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, baby, now (come on baby)
You got to start spreadin’ doubt (start spreading doubt)
Just show your twisted little world (shit little world)
Hold up your twisted sign (twisted sign)
Go on up, bitch a little closer, now (bitch a little closer)
And just hold that party line (hold that party line)
Ah
Ahh
Ahhh
Ahhhh
Ahhhhh
Yeah, you’re frothing like rabies, now (frothing like rabies)
Bitch and shout (bitch and shout)
C’mon, c’mon, c’mon, c’mon, baby, now (come on baby)
Jumping and screeching out loud (screaming out loud)
Just show your twisted little world (shit little world)
Hold up your twisted sign (twisted sign)
Go on up, bitch a little closer, now (bitch a little closer)
And just hold that party line (hold that party line)
Well, fake it, fake it, fake it, baby, now (make it up, baby)
Well, fake it, fake it, fake it, baby, now (make it up, baby)
Well, fake it, fake it, fake it, baby, now (make it up, baby)
Ah
Ahh
Ahhh
Ahhhh
Palin’s Panels Of Death
Sarah Palin reacts to Death Panel verdict regarding her political future.
As Sgt. Joe Friday from television’s Dragnet would say, “Just the facts, Sarah. Just the facts.” It would behoove all of Red America to heed those words of wisdom when it comes to health care reform. Honestly, is this all that health care reform opponents have left? These uneducated morons that keep showing up at Town Hall Meetings are making jack-asses of themselves every time they scream out one of their baseless talking points.
First there are the oh, so confused senior citizens who are screaming that they oppose a public health care option because they do not want their Medicare to be tampered with. Do they not realize that Medicare itself is a government taxpayer funded public health care plan? It would seem that their grey matter must have already appeared before one of Sarah Palin’s “death panels” because these folks are brain-dead.
Next, we have the flip floppers like Glenn Beck who go on Fox News every night and bemoan the potential demise of the greatest health care system on earth. Problem is, just two short years ago, while he was with CNN he said,
This is one of the most eye opening experiences of my life to receive health care in the United States. This is one of the hospitals where the President of GE is going. If they don’t care about the president of GE, do you really think they care about schlubs that are just average working stiffs?
A few days later he went on to say,
No matter how much our health care system would try to keep me down, I’m back. We seem to be a society or a system in health care that is that is just trying to shove the patients out that door as fast as they can. Getting well in this country can actually almost kill you.
Really, you cannot make this stuff up to be any funnier than it is. Please do yourselves a favor and watch the absolutely hilarious film clip of Glenn Beck And The Amazing Technicolor Flip Flop here.
Please stay tuned for more stories of the incredibly stupid Town Hall Protestors.
Today’s song parody is one in which we simply express the desire to get the actual facts of health care reform out there in front of the public. Please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.
Taxman song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Maz9ddxEQnM&feature=related
FACTS MAN
(sung to The Beatles song “Taxman”)
1,2,3,4,1,2
Let me tell you how it will be
Health care reform for you and me
So here’s the facts, man
Yeah, here’s the facts, man
Top two percent, they have it all
Fine health care and taxes that fall
But here’s the facts, man
(In those lands afar, far) Health can’t be beat
(It just costs a bit, bit) It’s quite a feat
(If you catch a cold, cold) Your script’s complete
(If you need nerve block, block) It’s down the street
Facts, man
(musical interlude)
So here’s the facts man
Yeah, here’s the facts, man
We need it like no time before
(Ah, ha please just fill us in)
Health reform will even the score
(A bill with some teeth)
So here’s the facts, man
Yeeeah, here’s the facts, man
Those “death panels” were just a lie (Facts, man!)
No-one wants grandparents to die (Facts, man!)
Those are the facts, man
Yeah, just the facts, man
Health reform for you and for me
(Facts, man)
The Palin Posse Parties Like It’s 1999!!!
Sarah Palin interviewing for slutty flight attendant position
The Palin Posse has pushed its way into the papers again. just when you thought it was safe to read the news again, you learn that Levi Johnston and Willow Palin are making headlines. It makes us Lower 48ers (why aren’t we Lower 49ers by the way?) wonder if the Palin extended family was always this public about things (with the exception of quasi-public/private emails that is).
Today we learned via a photograph published by the tabloid The Star, that 15 year old Willow Palin enjoys to quench her thirst with an Absolut and Mountain Dew. We also learned via US Magazine, that Levi Johnston is willing to pose nude if the price is right. Do these Palin attention seekers have no shame?
Today’s song parody harkens back to the days of David Letterman and Sarah Palin’s “slutty flight attendant” look.
In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.
Slit Skirts song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0C-8hyn4TI&feature=fvw
SLIT SKIRTS
(sung to the Pete Townsend song “Slit Skirts”)
She is just forty-five years old and she is still wandering in a haze
It’s no wondering why everyone I meet is laughing about those Palin days
I don’t know why she thought she should have some kind of divine right to the news
It’s apathy not cheers that she needs when she voices her warped views
Her incense burned away and her stench began to rise
And Sarah is so strange with those fetching wink-blinking eyes
The mis-haps of her children make her blood begin to boil
The hat atop her beehive should be covered with tinfoil
She had to quit Alaska cause of bridges that she burned
From all this you’d imagine that there must be something learned
Slit skirts, Palin always wears those slit skirts
Clothes that are so tight that it hurts
Can’t pretend that growing older never hurts
Scream rants, Sarah’s tweeting out her scream rants
It’s really about time for a new dance
If she wants to buy voter romance
Slit skirts, slit skirts
Slutty flight attendant look slit skirts, slit skirts
Her beehive hair and those slit skirts, slit skirts
High heels that are red and those slit skirts
Romance, romance is Sarah thinking of romance?
She’s like a stripper doing a pole dance
She may as well peel her pants
Let me tell you some more about herself, you know she’s starting to roam just now
Her days as governor are long passed and there’s no need for her to hang around
She’s number one on the drone team and still says, “Drill Baby Drill”
A silent voice in her broken heart knows her dreams will go unfilled
Just guess who will her next husband be, and will he be like HIM?
Will Sarah P. start to work off her frustrations in the gym?
Recriminations fester and the past can never change
And Palin’s expectations run from odd to outright strange
A careless and untrained mother and her best friend Meg
Put their brains together and it looks like scrambled eggs
Slit skirts, Palin always wears those slit skirts
Clothes that are so tight that it hurts
Can’t pretend that growing older never hurts
Scream rants, Sarah’s tweeting out her scream rants
It’s really about time for a new dance
If she wants to buy voter romance
Slit skirts, slit skirts
Slutty flight attendant look slit skirts, slit skirts
Her beehive hair and those slit skirts, slit skirts
High heels that are red and those slit skirts
Slit skirts, slit skirts
Palin’s always wearing those slit skirts, slit skirts
Practically bare in those slit skirts, slit skirts
She looks obscene in those slit skirts
Romance, romance is Sarah thinking of romance?
She’s like a stripper doing a pole dance
She may as well peel her pants
Coulter The Revolter
This is not really a newsworthy post this morning. It is a blistering hot and humid day here in Boston and we thought it might be fun to spend some time at the beach. We do not know really why the beach looks so appealing inasmuch as this week was comprised of a mini vacation that stretched from the mid-coast of Maine to Provincetown on Cape Cod. Nonetheless, nature calls (so to speak).
What do you folks think about having some laughs while simply making fun of that guy, Ann Coulter?
In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.
Lola song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRopmfinsWk
COULTER
(sung to the Kinks song “Lola”)
I saw her once last week on the Fox network
Where the hosts are lame and the guests are worse like Ann Coulter
She is a revolter
A big Adam’s Apple and masculine hands
She has the curves of a flagpole and a set of big huge molars
M-o-l-a molars mo-mo-mo-mo molars
Well I’m not the world’s most perceptive bloke
But she is a lady that I wouldn’t dare poke
That Ann Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Well I’m not dumb but I can’t understand
Why she walks like a woman but looks like a man
That Ann Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Well she sat right next to Hannity
And then was on Bill O’Reilly
They saw mascara on her eyes so blue
But I swear those guys didn’t have a damn clue
Well I don’t know if they are into men
But the next night on Fox she was on there again that Ann Coulter
Co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
I changed the station
M-S-N-B-C
Re-luct-ant-ly
I then turned back to Fox
Then I was convinced she was a he
Well I don’t know what ol Rush Limbaugh thinks
But I like women when they don’t have dinks like Ann Coulter’s
Co-co-co-co Coulter’s
She says that her wisdom sells her books
It’s gotta be somethin’ cuz it ain’t her good looks that Ann Coulter
Co-co-co-co Coulter
I took a closer look at Hannity
Now I’m not really so sure that he’s not a she
But this might be the Republican way
A sex change is good cuz then you’re not gay
Well I’m not the world’s most masculine man
But I’m never gonna take it right up the can
From no Mann Coulter
Co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter co-co-co-co Coulter
Poll Points To Palin Popularity Plummet
Just love that alliteration, don’t you? Well, it appears that the third time is not a charm for Sarah Palin when it comes to her approval rating. As we have noted here at Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off, on two previous occasions poll results have shown Palin’s popularity rating to be on the decline. It has now happened again. A recent CNN/Opinion Research Poll has revealed that the share of Americans who have a favorable view of her has dropped since May, to a new low of 39% as compared to 46% then. (See story here) It is also nearly a 20% drop from last September when her favorability rating was 57%. Like the Limbo Sarah, how low can you go?
In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.
Rawhide tv theme song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eWa7cuM5CXA
POLL-SLIDE
(sung to the TV theme of, “Rawhide”)
Fallin’ Fallin’ Fallin’
Keep movin’, movin’, movin’
People disapprovin’
Sarah’s not improvin’, Poll-Slide!
She cannot understand ‘em,
She hopes results are random,
Soon she’ll be in a double-wide.
There’s no way of definin’
Just why the polls declinin’, declinin’ like a massive
Landslide.
Headin’ down, movin’ fast,
Losin’ ground, ship her out,
Headin’ down, movin’ fast
Poll-Slide!
Kick her out, shoot her down,
Send her home, push her out,
Kick her butt, fallin’ fast
Poll-Slide!
Fallin’ Fallin’ Fallin’
Fallin’ Fallin’ Fallin’
Fallin’ Fallin’ Fallin’
Fallin’ Fallin’ Fallin’
Poll-Slide!
Fallin’ Fallin’ Fallin’
Her eyeballs are ballin’
How come no-one’s callin’?
Poll-Slide!
It looks like stormy weather
And she’s light like a feather
She’ll be swept under by the tide.
She’ll be unemployed soon,
A wolf killin’ buffoon,
And all this resultin’ from her lies
Headin’ down, movin’ fast,
Losin’ ground, ship her out,
Headin’ down, movin’ fast
Poll-Slide!
Kick her out, shoot her down,
Send her home, push her out,
Kick her butt, fallin’ fast
Poll-Slide!
For Glenn Beck, It Is Crying Time Again
Glenn Beck preparing for his show backstage.
The Fox News resident crybaby, Glenn Beck is at it again. Bawling and weeping and wailing. These repeated episodes of spontaneous outbreaks of tears lead us to believe that this reich wing pundit needs some serious psychological treatment. This week’s chapter in “The Jeers and Tears of a Clown” features Beck not only crying, but also comparing Democrats to Nazis yet again. (See clip here). When will Fox News and its hosts finally realize that not only is the Nazi comparison misplaced, old and stale, but that it is also disrespectful to those people and families that have personally experienced the actual horrors of Nazi Germany? To compare industry bailouts and health care reform proposals to the genocide and torture committed by Nazis, is to demean the victims of those atrocities and to lesson the true outrage that should be directed towards those monsters.
In Beck, Fox News has also found another person that seems to fit it’s employment criteria. Like the “family values” minded Newt Gingrich and Rush Limbaugh, he has been married multiple times. His educational background also measures up well with Limbaugh’s in that his college career lasted for all of one course. Yes, we said “course” not year or semester. Additionally, he also shares an alcohol and substance abuse history with Limbaugh. Two peas in a pod.
So Glenn, why don’t you just keep crying us that river.
In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.
Crying song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=074_qFG4Y0U
CRYING
(sung to the Roy Orbison song “Crying”)
He was all right for a while
With his own senile style
But now most every night
As he shills for the right
He’s a weepy strange fellow
Right wing crap he sells
He’s not too well
Beck begins crying right on cue
Crying, sobbing too
It just feels so wrong
When Beck’s singing his sad song
Alone and crying, crying
Crying, crying
It’s hard to understand
The thoughts of this sorry man
And why he’s crying
We thought that Glenn had quit the brew
It’s not true, not true
He’s drinking even more
Than he did before
That moron hasn’t a clue
And the G.O.P.
Cheers for him when he’s crying right on cue
Crying, sobbing too
Yes, now he’s gone
And from this moment on
He’ll be crying, crying
Crying, crying
Yeah crying, crying
Right on cue
Tweedle Dumb And Tweedle Dumber (McCain and Malkin)
Michelle Malkin posing for college yearbook photo.
Meghan McCain with Dad at Republican Convention.
This week on Celebrity Deathmatch, the feisty femme fatal from Philadelphia, “Malicious Michelle” Malkin vs. the ferocious philly from Phoenix, “Mavericky Meghan” McCain. And the Republicans think that only the Democratic Party can boast of “talented, tiny starlets.” This latest battle between female Republican pundits or spokeswomen resembles a teenage girl schoolyard cat fight. MEOW!
Of late, Meghan McCain (erstwhile daughter of former Republican Presidential nominee, John McCain) has advocated that the Republican Party should attempt to include more “moderates” in effort to stem its diminishing membership and become competitive in elections once again. She believes that by catering to its small conservative base, the party has become increasingly more irrelevant.
Uber-conservative pundit Michelle Malkin’s response? “Shut up!” How clever a retort.
To add fuel to the fire, McCain then said that although Malkin’s latest book rides atop the New York Times Best Seller List, McCain reaches far more people with her views because her Twitter followers more than double in number those of Malkin. Now them’s certainly fightin’ words.
The winner of this week’s battle will square off next week with the winner of the much anticipated Laura Ingraham vs. Ann Coulter pairing in their mixed sex match-up. Stay tuned.
In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.
We Can Work It Out song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HT2hElMqlFs
THEY CAN’T WORK IT OUT
(sung to The Beatles song “We Can Work It Out”)
Try to see Malkin’s way
All she does is keep on squawking till she can’t go on
Try to see McCain’s way
Just a kid foregoing all the love of neocons
They can’t work it out
They can’t work it out
All Meghan is saying
Neocons were wrong and moved way too far to the right
But Michelle is saying
McCain’s a kid that must learn to hate with lips locked tight
They can’t work it out
They can’t work it out
No one shall abort for it’s a crime
Keep fussing and fighting, my friends
G.O.P. group thought by Fox is fine
Broadcast from six till after ten
But to see Malkin’s way
So easy to tell that the far right is so damn wrong
She can’t see McCain’s way
And the chance that the right will fall apart before too long
They can’t work it out
They can’t work it out
Sight is very short in Malkin time
Nonplussing and fighting with friends
McCain’s only thought, not worth a dime
But she still “tweets” time and again
They should hit the highway
They emit a smell that is both ripe and very strong
Passing through a doorway
That will hit them in the ass as we shout out, “So Long!”
They can’t work it out
They can’t work it out
Palin Gets Slapped Down On Stimulus Veto
Congratulations to the Alaska State Legislature for over-riding former Governor Sarah Palin’s veto of federal stimulus funds. This is another clear indication that the quitter was not as popular in her home state as her supporters claim. Indeed, she must be very unpopular inasmuch as Alaska is a very Red State with Republican majorities in its legislature. Is it just me, or can you also begin to hear that proverbial “Fat Lady” beginning to sing?
In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along.
I’ve Got A Feeling song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtKT6QDYOQ8
I’M SARAH PALIN
(sung to The Beatles song “I’ve Got A Feeling”)
I’m Sarah Palin, a Palin deep inside
Oh yeah, Oh yeah (that’s right)
I’m Sarah Palin, a fact that I can’t hide
Oh no, no, Oh no! Oh no
Ya betcha! I’m Sarah Palin. Yeah!
Oh God believe me, I think I’ve gone insane
Oh yeah, yeah, oh yeah
And if you see me, I’m on the Crazy Train
Oh no, oh no, oh no
Ya betcha! I’m Sarah Palin. Yeah!
I’m Sarah Palin
All these years I’ve been living in Alaska,
Wondering why folks thought it was so great,
When all I ever really wanted was to live in the
Lower Forty-Eight
I’m Sarah Palin, Naughty Monkeys on my toes
Oh yeah, Oh yeah
I’m Sarah Palin, sporting “Arctic Cat” clothes
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh yeah
Ya betcha! I’m Sarah Palin. Yeah!
Every Palin had a hard year
Every Palin had a good whine
Every Palin has a snowmachine
Every Palin hates Ol’ Levi
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh yeah
Every Palin had a brain cramp
Every Palin loves both the “Joes”
Every Palin had a junket
Every Palin sportin’ new clothes
Oh yeah, Yeah! WOOOOHOO!
(repeat with both parts sung simultaneously)
[Oh my soul…it’s so hard]
Fox On The Run
The Crazy News Network just keeps getting crazier. Glenn Beck and Michelle Malkin are now telling conservatives to lay down their lives, if necessary to defeat health care reform. Lay down their lives? What is this, some kind of World War III? Fox News and it’s hosts and contributors are Koo-Koo for Cocoa Puffs.
As the result of some business obligations, we must be headed off to the coast of Maine and then Cape Cod for the next few days. We will try to post regularly, but if we cannot do so, please be patient with us for a few days.
In honor of the troops, please click on the song link below to have more fun singing along to this 1970′s hit song parody.
Fox On The Run song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MDCbIhTa_w
FOX ON THE RUN
(sung to the Sweet song “Fox On The Run”)
Why is that network insane
No one there has a brain
So easy to abhor
Each day they add a new pretty face
But they’re losing in the gene pool race
They speak like sidewalk whores
Fox on the run
They scream and everybody starts a-running
Beck, Britt Hume and big Bill O’Reilly
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.
Koo-Koo, that is the Fox network brand
As “fair and balanced” as DisneyLand
So easy to ignore
News, that is so God damned lame
Should hide their heads in shame
And show their hosts the door
Fox on the run
They scream and everybody starts a-running
Beck, Britt Hume and big Bill O’Reilly
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.
(musical interlude)
F-foxy, Fox is on the run
They scream and think that we’re having fun
Take a run and hide yourself away
Fox is on the run
F-foxy, Fox is on the run. They’ll fade away.
