Lynnrockets’ Blast-Off

Glenn Beck backstage preparing for his show

Next up on our list of reich-wing pundits is Glenn Beck of the Fox News network. Mr. Beck recently expounded on his theory that Adolf Hitler and the Nazis were liberal “left wingers”. Is Beck back on the bottle? If not, somebody better tell all those white supremacists, skinheads and KKK members that they have been voting for the wrong party. What will they think when they learn from professor Beck that the famous dictator that they loved so much for killing labor unionists, Jews and gays was actually more like a Democrat than a Republican. And what will the G.O.P. do when their voter registrations decline even more?

Even more astounding is how Beck has put the spin on the recent Holocaust Museum shootings and killing. It is Beck’s contention that the shooter, James von Brunn, a long term white supremacist and hater of Jews and African Americans was actually incited to carry out his shooting spree at the Holocaust Museum not because of his racist inclinations, but rather as a form of protest against President Obama’s “socialist” economic stimulus plan. Good lord, Beck better get to an AA meeting on the double.

In Beck, the right wing punditry has found another person that seems to fit it’s employment criteria. Like the “family values” minded Newt Gingrich and Rush Limbaugh, he has been married multiple times. His educational background also measures up well with Limbaugh’s in that his college career lasted for all of one course. Yes, we said “course” not year or semester. Additionally, he also shares an alcohol and substance abuse history with Limbaugh. Two peas in a pod.

As for today’s song parody, we had to venture over to cable television to find a theme song with lyrics as we seem to have already exhausted most all of those gems from broadcast television. We hope you enjoy this variation on Monk.

Please click on the song link below so that you will have more fun singing along.

Monk tv theme song link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvG8INRrWhM

BECK

(sung to the TV theme of “Monk”)

It’s Beck’s jungle out there
Liberals and Democrats everywhere
No one seems to care. But guess who?
Hey, Beck’s in charge here
It’s Beck’s rumble out there
Obama is Glenn’s biggest pet peeve
He don’t know what’s in the Kool-Aid that he drinks
But we do, and it’s hell raising
People think he’s crazy, cause he’s crying all the time
With no education, you’d be worried too
Beck better pay attention
Cuz if ratings drop Fox will, fire you know who
I could be wrong now, but I don’t think so.
Cuz it’s Beck’s jungle out there
And he’s got no damn hair.